Marill Re-Reads The Atamit
I'm so glad this one is short.
*goes to open file, sees that its bigger than Suicidal and Heiress*
Ah The Atamit, aka Stigmata backwards without the g and s. The one with the "main" plot of the former kids, still kids now teens being stigmatad/atamited. The one with the side plot being simply shippers boarding the ship after they finally get a pron scene. Yes, the one with the fruit pron. I think it was fruit? Marill once more proves she knows nothing about pregnancy, so maybe we can call it The Interactions Spell. Oh and before I forget, it's the one where James has an inappropriate conversation with a 16 or 17 year old girl.
OH BOY THIS ONE'S GONNA BE FUN
Lol that banner is so Season Three era-y. Shorter, PSP light effects, the textured font. Bless. I wonder if it had one before, or I for some reason decided to make one later for this horror.
Tom finished fixing a small holocamera onto his head, and he placed his off duty hat over it. Obviously having it back to front so the camera could see through the usual gap.
Hurray it's Paris Camera. I quite like that one.
Tom sighed, nothing interesting was going on.
Tom was about to walk back out of the room, when he saw the doors opening again.
Meanwhile, the Bridge:
F$$$$ HELL, DON'T LEAVE ME ON THAT CLIFFHANGER!!!
It was the night shift, as usual there was people asleep on consoles, people playing computer games, and some people were listening to personal CD players.
"Well this scene looks familiar," a guest star muttered.
"Good point," Vulpix's voice said.
Suddenly a white flash engulfed the room. Once it was gone, people were working at their stations, and the ones in charge weren't asleep in the chairs.
"Now, that's unexpected," the same guest star muttered. A console exploded next to him, and he died instantly.
"That wasn't," Lena said.
You know the rule people. Good ones start crap, so a bad one must start good.
Writer's Break 1, Marill's bedroom (very small one at that):
Vulpix sat back in the computer chair
well that didn't take very long at all
Raichu yells at my poor, sweet cat (RIP), tells off Vulpix for ?? writing something funny?, Marill is naive enough to think she'll get into Heaven, sequel movies are watched, Marill watches Vulpix's head, and I'm still wondering what came into the Mess Hall for Tom to film.
Lena and James were walking down the corridor, like you do, but instead of talking about nothing in particular, they were actually talking about something in particular.
Hmph I don't walk down corridors, don't ever speak for me
"What time, then?" James was asking.
"I dunno ten," Lena replied.
WAIT, TEN WHAT? 1000 HOURS OR O1000 HOURS
James looked around the room, it was dark and nobody was around. He headed towards one of the bedrooms, and went inside. Jessie was half lying on the bed playing on his Game Boy.
I can already hear the pron music
Jessie loves denying so much, she denies playing a game for more than a few minutes. I dunno OK
"So is Duncan with Danny and Ian?"
"Yeah, probably explains why I was so bored," Jessie replied.
Isn't it the nightshift, er time.
lol I typed nightshit
The Atamit's really getting to me
"Do you want to go to the Holodeck then, I've got two hours before Lena and I are going to training," James said.
WHAT TIME IS IT? I'M SO CONFUSED
IT'S REYN TIME
TIME TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE
Seriously though, this is only a few lines later, how can you muck this up. They agreed to meet at 10, so 10pm or 10am. If it's two hours to go, then it's either 8pm or 8am. Neither of which is a night shift.
"No, I can't be bothered to go anywhere," Jessie said.
"But there's nothing to do in here, we both can't play on the Game Boy," James said.
Holy naivety louise. If we ignore the time errors, it is pretty clear from everything that's happened what Jessie is up to. James is so dense, he needs to go on a massive diet for 10 years.
"Actually, there is something we can do," Jessie said and she looked towards the replicator.
"What, eat?" James asked.
"Half right, why don't we have a picnic in here," Jessie replied.
Jessie: Do you wanna do it?
James: Do what?
Jessie: You know, the nasty
James: I'm always nasty
Jessie: *sigh* Sleep together
James: It's only 8 in the morning, or 8 at night. I'm not tired
Jessie: Neither am I *wink*
James: Oookay then
Jessie: FFs, lets make love you idiot
James: What, since when can it be made?
Jessie: Oh come on, you know I'm allergic to the word. *whispers*
James: Ohno, the Kazon are back?
James Dies Count: 1
Lena walked into the room via the right door. She looked behind her as a group of people followed her in. She shrugged her shoulders and she sat down in front of Craig. She didn't notice that the people who followed her in were still watching her.
Ohno Tom has a filming crew
Lena and Craig looked at each, confused, then suddenly it hit them.
"Aaah, they're shippers!" Lena stuttered.
"No, you're wrong. J-Steps is the best ship here," one member of the group said.
"Nah, they're slow and annoying. They took ages to get together," one shipper said.
And sometimes they still don't act like they're together. Exhibit Z just above
"So, think of all the chemistry," a J-Stepper said.
"Aaaw," all the J-Steppers sighed.
Normally I'd agree, but James' "if you want to" naive passiveness in the last scene begs to differ.
"We can't find them, where can we find them? We might be missing something," a J-Stepper said.
Hahaha how right you are going to be
"What? Clearly C/7 is better," one person said
HANG THEM, BURN THEM AT THE STAKE, PLAY JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE FOR THEM... NO THEY'D PROBABLY LIKE IT
"Nothing shippy, lets go Craig," Lena said and she stormed out. Craig quickly followed her. They both ran into another group of people.
"You're not going anywhere with him Lena. You are suppose to be with James," one person said. Craig put on his jealous face.
Oh dear, are these shippers gonna be so embarrassed later
Then again Game of Thrones is popular. They'd probably gain more fans not lose em. Eeeew
Vulpix appeared in front of them
"What the hell are you doing here, you fools. Slayer shippers are not allowed," she said.
"You Slayer shipper betrayer, you used to believe," a Slayer shipper said.
Raichu decided to appear. "Ok, can you explain to me how all these shippers got aboard Voyager?" she asked Vulpix after she finished throwing up.
Cos The Atamit is so s$$$ it hasn't even happened yet
"I er, couldn't think of a sub plot so I pressed the 'Automatically Make Up Sub Plot' button," Vulpix replied.
From the makers of the Discuss Evil in the Dark Room and See You Soon Harry room.
Back in Jessie/James' Quarters:
Get the cold showers on standby people, it's about to get hot in here.
The pair had gotten the picnic all set up. They were a little hyper off the Cherry Coke they had, and they were having a fruit fight. They finally got tired of throwing small fruit at each other, and they started eating all the ones that had landed on the bed.
Good thing that fruit fight was on screen
Jessie picked up a Strawberry from the bed. She waved it in front of her. James saw, and he reached over to try and get it, but she'd already ate it.
You know what I've just realised.
No, it's probably best if I keep that realisation to myself. It's funny but kinda weird and gross
"No it wasn't," Jessie said as she found another one beside her. She started waving that one around. "If you want it, you're going to have to come and get it." James tried to catch her arm, but she was too fast for him, and she kept swapping the Strawberry to her other hand.
"You're going to have to do better than that," Jessie giggled. She spoke to soon, James tried something else, he pushed her instead. She fell onto her back, but she just laughed. She threw the Strawberry as far as she could. "Go get it."
I dunno, it was a lot more kinky when it was chips
James looked at her with a shocked expression on his face. "I can't believe you did that," he managed to say.
Are you sure that was strawberry she threw? Getting worried now that it's an euphanism for something else.
"I saw where it went, I'd tell you, but you have to pay me with something," Jessie said, she couldn't stop laughing. James collapsed next to where Jessie had landed earlier.
Yeah thought so.
James Dies Count: 1
"I haven't got anything," he said finally after a few minutes. Jessie sat up a little bit, and she leaned over him.
OMG FIFTH VOYAGER RATED 18 FOR SMUT
"Forget about it, it landed on the floor," she said and she giggled. She gently placed her right hand on the side of his face, and she started kissing him.
I dunno, how he can forget about his strawberry when you're doing that. yeesh
and a bit hours later, Lena's Quarters:
Lena was sitting impatiently on the sofa, while Craig just sat on the chair looking bored.
"Can you remind me, what the hell are we waiting for again?" Craig asked.
"James and I were suppose to go to the Holodeck to train," Lena replied.
Oh he's working out at least
"And you didn't invite me?" Craig asked huffily.
ugh, yeah this shipping is totally awesome with all the jealousy
"Busy?" Craig said questioningly.
"I doubt he would be," Lena said.
"That's what I thought. He'd better be, or I'll kill him," Lena said.
"Can I watch if you do?" Craig asked. Lena laughed slightly.
At least he'll die happy this time
OK I'LL STOP HAVING FUN, THE ACTUAL ATAMIT'S ABOUT TO START ANYWAY, KILLJOYS
"She said she's going to perform a murder," Kiara replied.
"Ok then. Having just the three of you will make it easier for me," Tuvok said.
Wait, this is Tuvok's idea?
"She's going to kill James," Kiara said cheerfully.
"That's nice, Miss Janeway, we had better be going to the Shuttle Bay," Tuvok said.
Tuvok: and? He'll be back by tomorrow
"We're going to have a piloting lesson today," Tuvok replied. The three teenagers looked at each other and they grinned like idiots.
Correction one sorta teenager and two looklikes teenagers but are kids, one's a baby
James stopped eating what he was eating as soon as a shadow loomed over him. He slowly looked up nervously to see Lena staring at him with a killer look in her eyes.
"Would you believe me if I said I forgot," James replied quietly.
"Nope," Lena said.
"Well I forgot," James said.
To be fair, Jessie did tell him to forget something and it sure wasn't the strawberry
"How could you forget, we've been discussing this all week. You can't just forget," Lena said angrily.
I know it sucks when plans are forgotten, but er, this was a little training in the holodeck. She's making a massive deal out of it, though then again she had to put up with Craig instead. Ok I get it
Lena rolled her eyes and she sat opposite him. "Did you have an argument with Jessie?" she asked.
"No, I just lost track of time," James replied.
Lena tried not to laugh. "A picnic? Tell me, how could you lose track of time when you're doing that?"
well it was on the bed, and this time some weird teenager didn't invite herself in to help herself to the chips
"You know what me and Jessie are like after two bottles of Cherry Coke," James replied.
At least it isn't booze this time
"I only noticed the time once it was midnight, so there was no point in turning up," James said.
Oh so it was supposed to be 10pm. Nightshifts at 8pm. I don't believe you.
Anyone interested in shippy maths, that's somewhere between 2-4 hours.
No wonder he's such a chick magnet
"Well I didn't get an apology over the comm for not turning up," Lena muttered.
"I never thought of that at that particular time, I wasn't in the mood," James said.
I'm so glad Lena's not using telepathy right about now, surprised though.
"What mood were you in, and it can't be a hyper mood," Lena said.
God damn it, it's like she's doing this on purpose
It's not like Lena to tease like this so I know she's not
"Erm, that wasn't the answer I wanted but never mind," Lena muttered. She watched him continue eating his chips, and she thought for a few seconds. "So what's with the long face?"
Ok, here comes the dumb, the retconny denial and s$$$
"It's embarrassing, I don't want to say," James said.
Unless that 2-4 hours were fruitless, that doesn't answer the question at all
"Yeah you did, you just thought it. Something to do with fruit," Lena said.
Ohno Lena. You don't want to know about the strawberries, trust me
"No, nothing else happened. We finished the picnic, went to bed late, slept in, now I'm trying to have breakfast," James said.
"That's your breakfast?" Lena said questioningly while eyeing the plate of chips.
"I got up at twelve, so it's half my dinner," James said.
I'm getting YWF flashbacks and it's making me smile... too bad I know it's gonna be retconned in a moment
So, 2-4 hours was the minimum? J-Steppers were right, they're the king of the shippers
But enough with that, James needs to go back to being a meek little manbaby. We can't keep assuming he had fun all night or anything, and has done so before
Gotta share this gem first though
"Why are you being so mean?" James asked.
DON'T CRY LOZ
I'M NOT CRYING
"Lena don't, I feel bad enough about it already," James muttered.
Ohno, no. I'm getting this all wrong aren't I? All of this happened off screen. Poor poor Jessie.
Danny: poor? *drools*
"Don't be such a baby, James. I won't judge you, I won't laugh at you, I'm your friend for god's sake! I don't see why you won't tell me, it can't be that bad. I mean..."
"I slept with her," James muttered. Lena just looked at him in a confused way.
OMG YOU SLEPT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND, SHE INSTIGATED IT TOO OMG, YOU EVIL SON OF A BITCH. OFF TO THE STOCKS WITH YOU
"I slept with Jessie, are you happy now?" James replied.
"No, I'm pretty p****d off now. You wouldn't tell me this," Lena said.
Um wtf Lena
Why should he, and why would you ever want to know?
"No offense Lena, but it's none of your business," James said.
"I understand that, why didn't you say that in the first place. I wouldn't of asked," Lena said.
"I'm sorry I didn't meet you in the Holodeck, something came up..........."
Oh lordie I'm already going to hell
"We couldn't help it,
Yeah, strawberries are known aphrodisiascs and booze at the same time. We had no choice
"What I'd like to know is why were you looking like it was the end of the world?" Lena asked.
Poor poor Jessie. This is giving my off screened joke a whole new meaning
"Mainly because I care about what happened, and she's acting strangely about it," James replied.
"Define strangely," Lena said.
Yeah I'm already on Jessie's side here
"She was already awake when I woke up. She was bloody happy, so it looked. I'm sure she's just faking it to make me feel better, but it's made me feel worse," James said.
Maybe she likes being beaten up off screen? Kinda weird but don't kink shame
HOW DARE SHE BE NOT JUST HAPPY, BUT BLOODY HAPPY AFTER AT LEAST 2 HOURS OF STRAWB...ER...FUN...LOVING... STOP LOOKING AT ME
Lena tried not to laugh. "You're just paranoid, I think she understands that because you're a couple it isn't such a big deal, unlike the ceremony incident and the love spell."
Yeah paranoid doesn't even begin to cover it. This is all messed up, I know why and that's why I'm joking around. It makes this easier.
"No she's mad at me, she's just pretending that she's not," James said.
If you don't stop talking like this, you're getting a badass off screen point. Don't make me do it.
"I just started to apologise when she said something like, don't waste your breath, and then she left the room to pick up Duncan. Secondly, she'd be here if she wasn't mad at me," James said.
Okay this is a seriously massive self esteem problem. At least I'd prefer to see it as just that. I know better. Once it's over then, ugh I'll blab about it.
Lena stood up. "I'll leave you two lovebirds alone." She giggled and she walked away.
and then when her back was turned she punched a wall, started sobbing and ran off
"Er, I hate to ask, but what are you looking at?" James asked.
Jessie shrugged. "You, who else?"
swoon that chemistry
Jessie started laughing. "Mad at you? Why would I be mad at you?"
Look when even Jessie isn't sweating this incident, maybe it's time to stop being such a weird paranoid asshat and chill the f$$$ out
"You know why," James replied.
No, no we don't. No. No.
"I suppose I do, but for some reason I'm not," Jessie said.
For some reason=obviously
Jessie tried to stop a grin from coming onto her face. "I'm pregnant," she whispered. James stared at her in shock, then he accidentally slipped off his chair. Jessie burst out laughing, and she tried to eat as many chips as she could off his plate. She tried to look innocent once he got back onto the chair.
Okay,maybe Jessie's a bit drunk or possessed. Maybe that's why he's a bit weird about it.
"Jessie, you're cruel. Don't ever do that again," James moaned.
"I'm hungry, I couldn't resist," Jessie said.
The usual denially and prudeish Jessie is merely having fun, clearly happy they're no long denying s$$$. Get with the program Jamesy
Though I'm still suspecting posession. I dunno how to sin this
"I can't believe you fell for it. Doctor Jones said it would be nearly impossible for me to have another kid because of the accident in Interactions," Jessie replied.
"It's not funny," James muttered, without realising it he was still pouting.
"You're cute when you pout, I really should do this sort of thing more often," Jessie said.
yes, you should, maybe when James stops pretending he's committed a crime against humanity
Jessie stood up, and she walked over to him. She put her right hand on his head, and she messed up his hair.
This is sort of thing you do to your son, not your boyfriend. Weird. Maybe that's why James is all mopey
She dumped it on the table, and she sat opposite James again. He looked at what she had, on one plate she had Cheese Macaroni, and on the other she had a pile of chips.
Two plates? I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED, LENA AND JESSIE HAVE SWAPPED BODIES. EEEW/OMG
Jessie tried the chips, and she looked back at the replicator. "I could do with some chocolate sauce," she muttered.
"What for?" James asked nervously.
"I don't fancy gravy, salt or vinegar, the chips need some savoury," Jessie replied and she stood up.
oh it's over
ffs. This side story. The main one hasn't even started yet, we're halfway through. Gosh this side story. I dunno where to start.
Please, oh please go back to read the beginning of YWF before Lena walks in. Then read this s$$$e. AND then continue reading that same YWF scene until it's over. I might not have to explain what the problem is here.
It's almost like two different people wrote it, for real and not pretended to be. One wants James/Jessie together as a proper couple, can sometimes write some chemistry full scenes of them, and even can stomach a scene like the strawberry one. Then there's the other writer, the one squeamish and embarrassed, the one that regrets that J/J aren't a chaste pairing and desperately wants to fix it, without actually fixing anything. They want them to still be childish Team Rocket.
You know what this reminds me of? Fry and Leela in Futurama, after it came back from cancellation... the second time. Some writers just could not write them. One episode even bothered to pretend they didn't get together.
FV does not actually have this excuse no matter how much it pretends to.
And yeah, Jessie was wanting chocolate on her chips and macaroni. It is exactly what you think its implying. nospoilersomg
It's dumb, so dumb and that rant will be much later.
I need a break before The Atamit gets bloody.
Naomi went over the console and she had a look at it. "A ship is approaching from that, er planet? Where did that planet come from?"
"They always appear when a shuttle is in use," Kiara replied.
Finally something true
"Our sensors detected females on your vessel. We demand that you turn them over," the guy said.
I told you, this episode is utterly awesome. Resistance is gonna get bent over Atamit's knee to get its butt smacked. The rest of Season Two will cower from Atamit's brilliance.
"We don't have enough females on our ship to clean up and cook for us," the guy replied.
"Do it yourself!" Kiara said angrily.
"What a disrespectful young lady, she needs discipline," the guy said.
I'll say this for the Atamit, and seriously instead of sarcastic for once, having the awayteam run into a mysognistic species a few scenes after a woman made the first move in a love scene, is actually a bit clever. Since my skin is itching, I'm sure it wasn't done on purpose.
"I have an idea, Mr Paris, get ready to take us to full impulse," Tuvok said. Bryan nodded nervously. "Miss Wildman, get ready to fire a phaser beam directly at their tractor emitters. Miss Janeway, take that station, and get ready to put a tractor beam on that ship."
It's no "here are the sequence of events" but what is?
"Mr Paris, fly us in the opposite direction of Voyager, once in mid flight, I want the tractor beam released," Tuvok ordered.
You getting this so far?
The Flyer flew into the planet's atmosphere, and the ship was let go. For some reason the Flyer kept flying towards the planet.
"Mr Paris, take us back to Voyager," Tuvok commanded.
"I can't, there's some sort of weird error on the helm," Bryan said.
See, replace "for some reason" with obviously and it works so much better
On the computer it said 'Warning, the plot is being initiated at long last, going back to Voyager wouldn't work out too well, so get bent. Have a nice day.'
Vulpix strikes again
"So what's the plot then?" Kiara asked. Naomi screamed and collapsed. "Remind me to never ask that again," Kiara muttered. Tuvok and Bryan rushed over to Naomi. Strange whip marks were appearing on her arms and face like if somebody was actually whipping her at the very moment.
Man Out Of You: oy, that's my thunder
Bittersweet: lol that ship's sailed, chump
Doctor Jones appeared out of nowhere with the usual smile on his face. "Please state the nature of the medical emergency," he said cheerfully. He looked around the room to see his 'patient', but all he saw was James. "Is there something I can do for you?"
James: doc help me find my strawberry
The Doctor: excuse me!?!
YES THIS IS MY NEW JAMES MEME, ACCEPT IT
"She's eating strange stuff. She ordered Macaroni Cheese, she hates the stuff. Plus she was going to put chocolate sauce on her chips," James replied.
"Is it just me or do you think you already know what's wrong with her?" Doctor Jones asked.
James: strawberry overdose?
The Doctor: I'm not touching that one
yes I know, it's not my best
"Well you don't have to be. She has 30% less chance of being pregnant than a normal woman does. On another note, I don't think she has a boyfriend," Doctor Jones said.
"I suppose you're right, so why is she eating like that?" James asked.
He's very commited to this denialy lie, isn't he?
"Well, the chocolate sauce thing is a completely different thing all together. I tell you what, I'll examine her and see what's wrong with her. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about," Doctor Jones replied.
I assume you'll ask her first. Right?
This really is Interactions Part 2
"What?" Kiara asked. The doctor looked at her strangely, and he turned to Bryan and Tuvok.
"Has this girl been disrespectful in anyway, like disobeying orders or mouthing off at one of you two?" the alien doctor asked.
"She's always like that," Bryan muttered. Kiara elbowed him hard. The doctor gave Kiara another strange glance.
Eeew, eeew, I can't say it enough
"Well this girl has the Atamit, my guess it won't be long until the other girl you have will get it," the doctor said.
"What is the Atamit?" Kiara asked. The doctor looked at her funny again. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
I'm sure some people would feel right at home on this planet. Maybe we should swap all the poor women for them. Problem solved.
"Then why don't you punish her?" the doctor asked.
Hang on a mo. We have no context or anything yet, but it still warrants the question; why would he *gag* need to punish Kiara if you have this Atamit thing that gets disrepectful girls anyway. Oh sorry, feeeeeeeeeeemales. He even implies Kiara's going to get infected anyway.
"I hate explaining this to off worlders. The Atamit is the Gods' word for Spiritual Punishment. Any female which breaks the amendments will be spiritually punished by the gods," the doctor replied.
Ho boy. I don't remember Stigmata other than the gorry details, but I really doubt it was like this
"Basically a female is suppose to be a faithful servant to the males. That means they have to be respectful, fully obedient. If they argue back, yell at a man, hurt a man in anyway, or be disrespectful, they are breaking the amendments," the doctor replied.
Yeah um, so all this has ever said to me and forever will, is that men like this are infantile little babies who can't look after themselves, and if they could they'd marry their mummy instead. Of course they won't admit this directly so puff out their chest, pretend to be all tough and manly so the "inferior" ones will do everything from cooking to putting Timmy's socks on for him. They're pathetic and nothing will change my mind
Make me a sandwich: I hear "I'm too incapable of putting buttering two slices of bread, slapping some cheese and/or meat in between it. It's too hard, help me mummy wah"
Back on topic, this planet the men have utterly fragile little egos (ahem) that long ago when a woman spoke words on the internet, some prat summoned a demon, pretended it was a god, made up a religion over it, all so he and no other man has to worry about having to wipe his bum after a poop ever again.
"Those gods must be insane, it should be men who have rules like that against them," Kiara growled. The doctor glanced at her oddly again.
In this planet's case, absolutely
In Earth's case? Yeah maybe try a trial run on a certain few men, a few months should do.
"There is none, I suppose some alien women who are being punished in this way are cured when they leave the planet," the doctor replied.
I'm starting to wonder if this doctor only ever treats men, and bars women even from the maternity ward
"I have no idea, but you should keep her at the hospital just in case something does happen," the doctor replied.
"That'll slow down repairs," Tuvok said.
"It will slow them down even more if we had to rush Kiara to the hospital if something did happen," Bryan said.
Pfftsnigger, yes cos Kiara and Naomi are vital in the repair of the shuttle
It's okay, they have Bryan. He's smart for his only a year old age
"Why are we having a break now, we've only done one scene?" Raichu asked.
*finger hovers over scroll thing on mouse* ATCHOO... oh look it's the next scene
"Hey, this is my series. I know what I'm doing!" Marill snapped.
F$$$ HOW LONG IS THIS THING
STOP MAKING ME WISH I WAS READING THE ATAMIT
"Kiara, what are you doing here, and what happened to you?" Bryan asked. Kiara was facing him with blood coming down her face, and blood was also pouring from her hands. She looked at him with bright red eyes.
A strange devilish voice came from Kiara's mouth, "live eurt morf devas eb llahs selamef ruoy dna edis ruo ot emoc, neila ynup!"
bwahahahaha, plead do you how
"Pots!" Kiara bellowed with her new voice.
This is almost too easy
"Mr Paris, step away from her. If I understand correctly, the being inside of her is speaking backwards. When you thought she said pots, she said stop," Tuvok said as he stepped out of the shuttle.
Oh my bad, quoted wrong episode. Flobidob blip blop bleep
"I think the being said something about to the dark side, and the females will be saved," Tuvok said.
Oh boy we're in Star Wars now. Maybe James will be redeemed by off screening Kylo Ren
I MEAN ADD TO HIS KILL COUNT
"No Mr Paris. The being wants us to turn to this planet's version of the devil for help," Tuvok said.
No he wants the past to die, kill it if you have to
James: now you're speaking my language
"Tey uoy htiw dehsinif t'nsah eh syas eh, kcuf, retsam ym tlusni uoy!" Kiara snapped. Her normal voice screamed in pain, and she collapsed onto the floor. Blood continued to pour from her body as she lay there. Bryan and Tuvok knelt down beside her. Tuvok checked her pulse.
lol sneaky swearword uncensored there.
Is it too late/early to remind everyone again that Kiara's something like 5 years old here?
One grabbed James' arm tightly. "Leave Jessie, you'd be great with Lena," she said. More shippers surrounded the poor pair.
Kill Count, Kill Count
"Come on, just one little kiss and we'll leave you alone," one shipper said, the others agreed. James and Lena turned slightly pale, they looked at each other
Hey guys, there's a kiss in an episode called New Earth. Go nuts, enjoy
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Lena asked.
"Yep," James replied.
Lena went over to the nearest corner, and James went to another, both pretended to throw up.
"Away," Lena replied, she and James walked faster. They both smiled as they turned the corner. The Slayer shippers hit the corner, they quickly turned around and went back the way they came. A few seconds later the Aquarius shippers and the J-Steppers came around the corner and they chased after the Slayer shippers.
Ah teamwork, gotta love it
And yes I'm still thinking of a better way to Playing With My Dolls score this sucker. Maybe a point per scene?
The pair quickly ran off leaving the shippers to fight for their opinions on couples.. when you say it like that, it sounds sad doesn't it, but I can't say anything.
It is sad. Guilty.
"Yes, she has the Atamit. But the possession was not caused by the gods," the doctor said.
"So how and why did she get possessed?" Bryan asked.
"It happens very rarely, but sometimes a messenger from the Dark Caverns takes over an Atamit victim to try and claim their souls," the doctor said.
"How is your repairs getting along?" the doctor asked.
"We'll be able to leave in a few hours, I don't see why Voyager hasn't found us yet," Tuvok replied.
"Tom, Harry, what are you doing with that opps station?" Kathryn asked angrily when she stepped out of her Ready Room. As it looked Tom and Harry were redesigning the opps station.
"Chakotay, why did you let them do this?" Kathryn asked. Chakotay looked up from reading a magazine.
"What?" he said questioningly. Kathryn groaned and she snatched the magazine off him. She looked at it and she gave Chakotay a strange look.
"Star Wars magazine, what are you, a traitor?" Kathryn asked angrily.
YES, I SHIP REY AND FINN. COME AT ME YOU WEIRDO REYLOS
Not just any gross either, Timeless gross.
Kathryn angrily threw it onto the floor. A passing crewmember picked it up to look at it but it exploded, killing the crewmember instantly, nobody could of cared less.
I'm sorry, I laughed
"Now that's just stupid, where would you get that idea from?" Chakotay asked.
"This 'Spoilers or Rumours' book," Kathryn replied as she pulled out a note book.
"Nooooooooooooo, how did she get that!" Vulpix's voice screamed.
The book disappeared instantly.
This, I did not laugh at
"Well I'd think that the Delta Flyer being totally raided leaving nothing but metal is a bit of a problem," Bryan replied.
my guess is they were mugged off screen while carting Kiara off to the hospital. That's all I got.
"Well if these girls stay on this planet any longer, they will die of loss of blood," the doctor said.
"Can't you replace it?" Tuvok asked.
"No, that would anger the gods," the doctor replied.
This planet may need nuking from orbit
Where's the F9 when you need it?
"You know what to do, I'll be there in a minute," the doctor said. The nurse nodded his head and he rushed back down the corridor. "The girl you know as Kiara has been having more of the Atamit, the girl called Naomi has only had the whiplashes."
Not surprising when you said this other fakegod had cursed her or something, I dunno, I couldn't care less
"It should have ended by now," the doctor said, he walked away from the bed and he knelt down on the ground. Everyone looked at him like if he was crazy. "Uiloi iutej sertic pilou, ira yuter!" he said like if he was saying a prayer. Nothing happened. "Uiloi iutej sertic pilou, ira yuter!" he repeated.
That's not backwards! HOW DARE YOU
"It's an old religious phrase, it means spare this girl from your wrath," one of the nurses said.
too late for him to change his belief system and get a conscience
"It's working, the knife wounds have ceased!" another nurse exclaimed.
Honestly I don't care. It's over, nearly. Well Atamit is anyway
"If something else happens, she will most probably die," the doctor said.
"But I thought they spared her from their wrath," Bryan said.
Oh FU Atamit, getting my hopes up
"It's connected to that video camera in the transporter room, and various other places I can't name... I'd better stop talking," Tom replied.
"Tell me, Tom, did you place those video cameras?" Kathryn asked.
"No, it was that unknown crewman that got blown up," Tom replied.
OK I BELIEVE YOU
"They're in Sickbay, Captain. Doctor Jones says the reset button is ready after Suicidal's little usage," Harry said.
Oh is that why the wounds weren't healing. Here I thought it was a supernatural side effect or something. mybad
"A nice harmless examination of you, won't take long," Doctor Jones replied. Jessie shrugged her shoulders and she sat on the biobed. Doctor Jones walked over and he scanned her.
"I take it I'm ok then," Jessie said.
Doc: brb I've got to consult my office first, series traditions, you understand
"Well you're erm, pregnant," Doctor Jones replied. Jessie just stared at him in shock.
"That is bloody impossible!" she stuttered.
Really, didn't you tell James earlier that it was NEARLY impossible. words matter, or they should
"So who is it then, or do I have to find out for myself?" Doctor Jones asked.
lol what a d$$$head
"Oh for f**k sake, it's James, we've been sort of seeing each other since August. Are you happy now!" Jessie muttered, she folded her arms and she pouted.
I'm really struggling to decide how to handle Jessie's sins in this one. I'll try to figure it out at the end.
"Actually no, those damn J-Steppers will be in here any..." Doctor Jones said.
Then why did you ask/demand, you nosey moron
"This is just sooo cool, I love it when things happen early," one said.
"Yeah, Season Three is too far away isn't it?" one said.
o_0 am I misremembering?
Oasis of Abatua, the bodged copycat sequel to Resurrection and company, was started and intended to be in Season Two. I cannot remember why the plans changed, my theory is spoilerific so I won't say it. But anyway in the original draft, it followed after Territory somehere which unfortunately didn't change from its own draft (we'll get there, we'll get there), and I was absolutely sure Jessie was pregnant then too.
It happening in Season Three doesn't fit anywhere. So confused.
Nm that's the end. One poop down, four to go.
Muttered Count: 53 (1548)
Lena the Sue Count: 0 (39)
Lena (Child)Abuses Her Power: 0 (35)
Annika Dies Count: 0 (10)
James Dies Count: 0 (5)
James Kill Count: 0 (4)
James Badasses Off Screen For Our Sins: 0 (17)
Just A Little Bit More: 0 (39)
J/C are the worst (grand)parents ever: 1 (28)
Sexist Crap Count: Ho boy I wasn't keeping track... Quick skim time, yay.
Detected females 1, clean and cook for us 2, disrespectful 3, Naomi the kid gets whipped for talking which is a doubler at least 5, victim blaming/mouthing off at a man how dare she 6, Kiara merely says what and asks questions, the doctor looks at her as if she made a your mamma joke 7, punish=training 8, faithful servant 9, obediant 10, hurt a man 11, women can't even get blood transfusions 12, and finally the Atamit being a gorry/bloody punishement two kid characters get adds another 5.
Grand total 17
Jessie's Sin Points:
This one's tricky because Jessie was meant to be a little out of character the instant she and James played with strawberries for 2-4 hours. You know cos she was instantly pregnant the moment... yeah you get it. So I guess I can only judge from before she was knocked up and I don't see anything wrong other than the weird Game Boy embarrassement.
Earned 0, Lost 0 (2) Remember, she has 36 from Season One to still erase.
Marill's Playing With Her Dolls Again:
1 point for every scene + how many different pairings were mentioned. 4 scenes + 8 pairings = 12
1) Writer scenes. And lots of them. (2)
2) I'm not sure why the scene with JJ before their strawberry fun is so damn awkward. Game Boys are embarrassing, hint missing, go somewhere for 2 hours stilted dialogue.
3) The shippers plotline does absolutely nothing but fill, and the writers parts already do that.
4) Tuvok takes the 3 kids on a piloting lesson, and even says that one of their mums (Lena) being missing makes it easier. I took it the wrong way but I don't think there's a right way.
5) Lena makes such a massive stink over something as minor like a missed training session, which wouldn't be so bad cos yeh being jilted isn't nice, but it's her interrogation of him later which bugs me the most.
6) James' mopey attitude during the morning after is just so so weird. You can really stretch it thin by thinking that the two's night together was a little kinkier than they usually do and/or rough, so he's embarrased and/or feeling bad about it. Still, when Jessie's all smiles and teases he should really take the hint and stop stressing over it. At least this makes it in character for him, he's got massive issues in this subject.
I know it wasn't what I said, it was a retcon. It was meant to imply their first time together that wasn't love spells or rituals. Why? Cos I was the one that was embarrassed writing that foreplay scene, and I was backtracking so damn much I fell off the cliff. Which brings me to another related complaint...
7) Sure The Love Spell was also guilty of this (Interactions too), and were marked accordingly. It's implied that Jessie's pregnant because of this night, but she gets the cravings immediately. I'm definitely not an expert, but I'm not even sure that her pregnancy can even be detected at this point, let alone making her crave chocolate on chips.
It's easier to edit this to remove the first time implication, and leave the date of conception up to interpretation. Or just who gives a s$$$
8) The Atamit's main story is just so over the top, a few years ago I'd say it was too parody like to be taken seriously. It's clearly meant to be, nothing funny about it except for maybe "pots!" Nowadays I see a lot of people talking and thinking like these aliens, and so instead of the plot being just OTT stupid, and it is, it's also very uncomfortable.
It was not necessary either for the so called story. Kiara and Noami could've been hurt because of anything else. Or not at all. Why it had to be Naomi and Kiara is a sin on its own, they are children (2)
10) James goes to Sickbay cos he thinks Jessie's pregnant, and asks him to scan her. This is horribly familiar to his abortion visit in Interactions and DONOTWANT
11) The writers scenes again, yes, my complaint revolves around me this time. Yes I was a mess, fine, but the heaven remarks, the zoning out, the poorme remarks. Attention seeking/crying for help at its "best"
12) Why was Kiara's Atamit different from Naomi's? It lead absolutely nowhere.
13) What was the deal with Tom's camera on the head and putting up other cameras around the ship, with a TV screen attached to the helm and/or opps. Why do I get the feeling this is one of those pointless things that are going to be mentioned later?
14) Janeway and Chakotay are once again very casual when they find out their granddaughter is missing. Janeway even hints she knows exactly what's going on, which makes it really really bad.
15) Why does the Doctor want to know who the father of Jessie's baby is, so much so that he'd go against her wishes to find out?
1) I did like the fourth wall-y change to the night shift scene at the beginning, WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO???
2) An actual love scene, and it wasn't that bad... unless you take mainly James's reactions seriously. I didn't, I hope he was playing along.
3) Kiara's still cute, telling Tuvok about James's impending murder.
4) Random crewmember dies from picking up a Star Wars magazine. Everyone continues on as if nothing happened.
Marill's Rating: 19%
Ooph, I guessed 10. Oh well, still a crappy score. The Love Spell still can't rest easy, not with Return of FANFIC DIMENSIONS and Territory on the horizon. If Atamit couldn't beat it, I doubt Lea Halelela will so that's out of the running.
Rankings So Far:
#02 YWF: 45%
#03 Disconnected: 40%
#04 Kiss of Death, Bittersweet, Suicidal: 38%
#05 Interactions: 37%
#06 The Resurrection: 36%
#07 True Q: 35%
#08 Cause & Effect: 33%
#09 Saturday Night, Precise Timings, The Curse of Voyager: 31%
#10 Games Resistance: 29%
#11 Thrown Key Part 2: 23%
#12 F9: Control Failure: 21%
#13 Why oh Why: 20%
#14 The Atamit: 19%
#15 An Apple A Day, Heiress: 17%
#16 I Know What You've Done This Season: 16%
#17 Halloween: 15%
#18 Dimension Jump: 14%
#19 The Slayers: 12%
#20 The Love Spell: 10%
Next Time: Marill likes this soundtrack song which isn't in English, possibly in an African language, and decides to centre an episode around it being some Native American healing spell. This one's totally not racist at all. Upendi says hi.