Marill Re-Reads Territory
Long time ago a few Season Two (and Three) entries were started far in advance in some notebooks. From what I remember, this and Oasis of Abatua were written around the same time, a time when Oasis was a Season Two entry.
Territory was trash in draft form and I'm sure I knew it, but I still used it. Why? I dunno. Why is it trash. The below gif sums up the majority of the plot, which grossly hijacks the whole point of the episode.
I'm hoping it'll be better than the last trash we sorta went through. It's the last of a bad lot at least. Lets get it over with.
Harry and Tom get invited to Danny and Ian's wedding. Tom's response is very Hunters-ry
"Well Danny and I are planning to have our wedding this week," Ian replied.
"Oh, that's great. What date?" Tom asked.
"Tomorrow, fourteen hundred hours," Ian replied.
"Wow, that's short notice," Tom muttered.
Six days later would also be short notice. He should already be shocked before Ian says the date and time.
"I don't know, it's the best man's job, and I haven't got one yet," Ian replied.
Oh dear, James has be defriended (again)
Tom quickly jumps in, with Harry's encouragement, to plan the actual wedding location. It's okay, planning the bachelor party was a step too far, he knows his place.
And because Marill had recently seen the Las Vegas Friends episodes again, this episode practically writes the rest itself.
"Well me and James are her only male friends. Plus I'm friends with you, Tom, Craig and Lee," Ian replied.
"Who have you chose!" Harry asked angrily.
Woah Harry, he's not picking the chief of the gorry bodies party
"Oh, sorry, James," Ian said calmly. Harry's anger went away quickly, and he started to laugh.
Okay fine, why tell Tom and Harry before the one you want as a best man?
And why is this funny? We all know James is a party animal alcoholic
"She likes James & Craig better than me!" Harry moaned.
Wtf Harry? I can't think of one scene you've shared with Danny or Ian, let alone interacted with them
"Don't be. She's known James for eighteen years. She's known him longer than she's known me," Ian said.
He says this but is seriously thinking of adding an extra duty to the best man list.
"I was wondering, do you want to go to the Las Vegas program with me?" Craig asked.
Oh yeah, Las Vegas is Tom's latest masterpiece. Why anyone would willingly go to this with his track record, they're insane.
Lena though already has plans
"Who with?" he asked.
"James of course. What kind of question is that?" Lena replied questioningly.
"You seem to be spending a lot of time with him. Where are you really going?" Craig asked.
Obviously she's going to his bed to eat strawberries
"You're lying, you're going out with him aren't you," Craig said.
Lena shook her head in disbelief. "Don't be silly, he's going out with Jessie."
"Don't I know, she's going to get a shock soon enough," Craig said.
Craig's jealousy is annoying, but it's meant to be.
Lena stood up and she walked closer to Craig. "Can't a girl be friends with a lad without going out with him?" she asked angrily.
"Yes, but you spend more time with him than you do with me!" Craig replied.
at this point I don't blame her
"Well maybe he's more fun to be with than you are!" Lena yelled.
Craig stared at her with a shocked, yet upset look on his face. "You don't mean that."
"Yeah I do. You know what, Craig, you and I are finished!" Lena yelled back.
"What for?" Craig asked.
Wait, you're serious?????????
what for *snigger*
"Well if you're so sure that me and James are an item, what's the point," Lena replied, and she folded her arms.
"So, I was right?" Craig asked.
Craig turned to leave. He stopped at the doorway and he turned back around. "Fine, but I doubt Jessie's going to be to happy with you," Craig said in a rather upset voice.
Oh yes of course, only blame the girl no matter what. Jessie wouldn't blame her actual boyfriend if he cheated on her, she'd blame the 16 year old who he took advantage of. bleurg
Sexist Crap Count: 1
Jessie shrugged her shoulders. "Danny wants me to be one of her bridesmaids."
As usual James was taking a drink when she said that. He nearly choked on it.
"She asked you," he said in disbelief.
I'd tell this guy that I'm going to pick the Cherry Coke and he'd choke to death
"Why is that so unbelievable?" Jessie asked, and she stared at her boyfriend with killer eyes.
James got rather nervous because of the look. "I didn't say it was."
You meant it though
and we still dunno why he was shocked, cos...
Jessie took a drink from her milkshake and she instantly calmed down. "I have to bloody wear a white dress, she showed me it yesterday and it's awful."
"What's wrong with it?" James asked so he didn't say anything that would anger her again.
But...but asking that would anger her again
I'm not sure if Jessie's hatred of dresses and skirts has been mentioned or shown yet. Still, with the next line it was already decided.
"For one thing it's a dress," Jessie replied, and she laughed. "But seriously, it's rather revealing." James raised his eyebrow. "Don't get any ideas."
"I'm not like that, Jess," James muttered and he took another drink.
"Anyway I didn't mean it was revealing in the way you probably thought," Jessie said.
Really, Danny didn't give her a short, cleavage showing bridesmaid dress?
that is truly shocking
What she means is that it reveals the baby bump she probably shouldn't have yet. *checks dates* one month later? nope. Jessie's already paranoid and self conscious, she'd merely think she has one already, letting this pass.
"It doesn't matter, I'm not wearing it," Jessie replied nervously.
"Why not, Danny won't be too happy," James said.
It's like this is somebody posing as James. He should know that Danny considers Jessie her best friend, that Jessie doesn't like dresses so much that she refuses to go near them. What's next, he'll be shocked that she is looking forward to going clothes shopping for the wedding party. "What, why??"
James guesses that she means it's tight and so figure hugging, which he thinks she'll be self conscious about. Which well.. he's a little right but good god. Craig's not the only one getting dumped in this one.
"Well, you were right," Jessie replied, sounding a little guilty with her lie.
"I don't know what you're worried about then, it's not like you're fat or anything like that," James said.
he's just very, very awkward :/ not malicious, to her.
I'm sorry but this whole bit seems very "men are dumb/toohonest when their girlfriend asks if their bum is too big in this" stereotypical
Sexist Crap Count: 2
After that weirdness, Craig enters the arena to get his garbage kicked
"Don't try to act innocent, I know that you're seeing her," Craig said angrily.
Jessie and James looked at each other and they burst out laughing. Craig stared at them in disbelief.
Hahaha, I love this reaction.
"Craig, you're an idiot," Jessie replied while still laughing.
That word isn't anywhere near strong enough
"You spend an awful amount of time with her," Craig replied.
"Yeah, we're friends. Nothing wrong with that," James said.
I can't believe I'm gonna say this; in Craig's defence *Gag* James has and still is dating his best friend.
On the otherhand, piss off with that attitude Craig
"She didn't obviously. Craig, she's seventeen, I'm twenty eight. In my opinion she's still a kid, why would I go out with her when I've got a perfectly good girlfriend already," James said.
Badasses On Screen
HE'S BACK AND KICKING BOTTOM
Jessie forgets all that weird "what you be Danny's bridesmaid and what's wrong with dresses, but you're not faaaat" stuff, and is instantly chuffed with this remark.
Jessie grinned. "Yeah, Craig. Why would he want Lena, when he's got me."
Craig collapsed onto the nearest chair, and he hid his face with his hands. "What the hell have I done?"
That was easy
"So she's broken up with you, I don't blame her," Jessie said. Craig looked up at her.
"Why don't you blame her?" Craig asked.
"Well she must of come to the conclusion that you don't trust her. If James stopped trusting me, I'd dump him," she said.
Of course. My girl has some self respect, good for you
Jessie's Sin Points: -1
"Well you can't do anything if you don't trust her," Jessie replied.
Yes in full agreement. He still never considers why Lena may want to spend time with James than him, and pretty much blames her for his lack of trust. sod him
Jessie rolled her eyes. "You're one of those people who think guys and girls can't be friends with each other, aren't you?"
GET HIM JESSIE
"James and I have been friends for twenty four years," Jessie said.
"You two got together though, that's not a very good example," Craig said.
and yet they still are in this situation. Craig wants to be like them with Lena. Jessie trusted James all those years, and they ended up together. Craig does not trust Lena with other guys, they split up. It's really very bloody easy
"Craig, forget it. If you can't trust your girlfriend spending time with male friends then you shouldn't have one," Jessie said.
Jessie's Sin Points: -1
This greatness is followed by such a bizarre line, soooo bizarre for even FV I'm thinking it's a rip off or something. It is now gone and lets never speak of it again.
Following on from the almost as bizarre bit in the last one where Emma hypo'd Jessie to steal her blood, then inject herself with it... yes that was a thing that happened, you don't get 7% for nothing
Emma giggled. "Well I snuck into Sickbay yesterday and I took some of Doctor Jones' nanoprobes. I injected them into me, so I'm connected to who they belong to. I'm trying to figure out who it is."
she knows it was Jessie. DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK TO "RETURN" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"You? Don't lie. Everyone around here knows how to work a bloody hypospray. So why did you use one on me?" Jessie asked.
"Ok, if you really wanna know, I took out some of your blood," Emma said. She pulled the hypospray back out, and she waved it around. "Wanna see it?"
"I think I might keep it. Nobody would believe me if I said that I did this intentionally, so I'll just say that I stole it from the Doc and I don't know who it belongs to," Emma said.
Emma looked at the hypospray she had been keeping in her pocket. She had the strangest of urges to inject herself with it. She shrugged her shoulders, and she did so.
Love Spell didn't stand a chance in hell, did it?
If she's pretending that she doesn't know, what is she doing here
oh who cares, Emma wouldn't flipping do this. sostupid
"I have a theory that it's Jessie though," Emma said.
gee what gave that away!?!?!
"Well, Lena, you're better off without him," Kathryn said.
"Yeah, but he was a funny guy to be with. I would of stayed with him if he wasn't so damn paranoid about James," Lena said.
Poor Lena. Janeway's right, Craig can shove his insecurity up his ass
"Maybe he had a good reason too. I mean I get worried about the same thing. You do spend a lot of time with James," Kathryn said.
"Most of the time we're Games training. Besides Jessie would be acting paranoid too but she trusts James. Obviously Craig doesn't trust me," Lena said.
"You can't expect to have a good relationship with someone who doesn't trust you. You should find someone else," Kathryn said.
Agreed on most accounts
"I don't want to find someone else," Lena said.
"Then don't. If you're happy being single, then be single," Kathryn said.
Too bad the crap parents counter doesn't work like the Jessie Sins
"Thanks mum, but I think I lost Craig's friendship too," Lena muttered.
"You didn't do anything wrong, remember that," Kathryn said.
daaaaw, that's more like it Janey
Meanwhile Jessie plays hard to get with a game in the casino, James calls her bluff and suddenly Jessie needs an appointment with Gamblers Anonymous.
Meanwhile again Tani steals Phoebe's Las Vegas plot. SKIP
Elsewhere Ash Ketchum is wandering around, wondering where the Pokemon Gym is. Instead he runs into Joey's hand twin crap
FINALLY back to Lena we can continue getting quotes
"I just wanted to apologise for accusing you of seeing James," Craig replied.
"That's nice. Do you expect me to take you back now?" Lena asked sarcastically.
YOU TELL HIM LENA
"You don't get it do you? We don't just suddenly make up just because you apologised," Lena replied.
"But I thought friends forgive each other," Craig muttered.
Lena sighed. "Fine, but only because James didn't turn up again."
BAD CRAIG, VERY BAD CRAIG
AND BAD JAMES, STOP STANDING LENA UP. THIS TIME IT ISN'T A GOOD REASON
Back to Friends and Phoebe/Tani, with Lisa co-starring as the old lady. Tani runs into her weird 10 year old friend whining about his hand twin, and we return to the Lena gets guilt tripped into hanging out with her ex show.
which is also meant to be the Ross and Rachel part
Twenty minutes later, on the plane:
The plane was full of holographic passengers. Lena and Craig had to sit next to each other.
Tom has really run out of ideas, good and bad. You have to go on a plane in this Holodeck program? WHY
because the Las Vegas episode had plane scenes. ofcourse
"You're not scared of heights, are you?" Craig asked.
Lena's actually afraid of heights!
James appears in a poof of smoke to complain that only he's allowed to steal people's fears, and to cut it out. He poofs off again.
Craig imagines him poofing into the plane's engine
the Friends gag starts. If you haven't seen it, here goes. Craig randomly shouts something that makes the entire plane think Lena asked him to join the mile high club. Craig cackles about revenge being sweet and I...
wtf did Lena do? rightly dump him for accusing her of having an affair, fall for his guilt trip to go on a friend date to Vegas with him, not smack him in his stupid jealous face, be scared of heights?
At least in the Friends version Rachel does start it, but to be fair he was a huge creep before and she had all the right to make fun of him for it. So yeah Craig and Ross are pieces of s$$$ for this
Lena responds by throwing water on his pants. How Craig hasn't been garbaged yet is beyond me
Lena had fallen asleep, on Craig's shoulder. He looked down at her, he smiled evilly, and he summoned a airhostess over to him.
"Excuse me, have you got any pens?" he asked.
Oh yeah, Friends. pfffffffft
The airhostess tried to keep a straight face when Lena walked past her. Craig had drawn a moustache on her face.
LENA DID NOTHING WRONG
Back to Tani and Ash Ketchum, snore, for a moment before we return to James and Jessie starting up the Monica and Chandler part of the plot
James is also a dick and laughs at Lena when she shows up with her new mustache.
Craig remarks the pen is permanent, and I think "walk off the sodding holodeck, that'll remove it"
They shove off to prepare for their drunken wedding. The Monica/Chandler plot kicks off
"Forget that, if you win, we get married tonight," James said. Jessie stared at him, gobsmacked. Everyone else cheered.
yes this is an imposter, I knew it
We get a callback to that weird few lines I deleted for being bizarre, and I'm forced to edit. Friends continues with Jessie losing one of the dice, so she and James have to crawl on the floor to find it lying in between them, they've won so smooch.
I'll let you know when the actual original material starts. probably at "the end/to be continued"
The next scene proves me wrong
"Fine, if you like Duncan so much, you can babysit him," Meowth said, and he got away from Duncan's grasp again. "I wish I was back on my Voyager. My Jessie and James didn't have an annoying brat," Meowth said.
"Why?" Duncan asked.
"Why?" Duncan asked.
"Because," Meowth replied angrily.
"Why?" Duncan asked.
I laugh but this would be annoying in real life
More unoriginal scenes with Lena and Craig being pissed in their shared ?? hotel room. Then Jessie and James going into a clothes shop for their wedding gear. Then Lena draws on Craig's face so they can go out.
And now the moment we've all been waiting for
wedding chapel on a nearby planet:
Jessie and James walked in, with the jumpers on.
"Ok, we're here. Ready?" James asked.
Jessie looked around nervously. "No, I think I'm sobering up," she replied.
"Me too," James muttered.
The doors to the main room burst open, and Jessie & James looked to see who was coming up. They stared in shock.
"Yey, me a Mrs!" Lena yelled in a slurry voice.
Go back to Voyager's Drinking Game
Hate me later
or now, your prerogative
"Is drunken marriages a Janeway family trait?" James asked.
"Oh my god, they got married!" Emma yelled suddenly.
"How did you know?" James asked.
I didn't actually ask for original material. really pleasegod
Emma looked nervous and she smiled slightly. "I kinda nicked Jessie's nanoprobes, I can hear her thoughts," she said.
I have been wondering why draft Territory had this Emma can hear Jessie's thoughts just for that later scene that might put Atamit's strawberry one to shame. I have a theory but I dunno if I should or could share it.
It's a copy I think. What else is new?
"You two were going to get married too!" Emma said.
Jessie and James looked nervously at each other. "We were a bit high on Cherry Coke," Jessie muttered.
What else is new?
"Lena's one of Danny's bridesmaids, she's going to have a bit of a shock in the morning, and I don't mean because of the hangover," Jessie said.
what's that disgusting thing got to do with Lena being a bridesmaid, or did I misunderstand?
"Eeew," everyone but James said.
I assume James heard the bridesmaid part first and hasn't thought the same as the others, kinda like what I did.
"I think I'm going to throw up," Emma muttered.
"Ok, I didn't think it was disgusting," Jessie said.
Oh so Jessie didn't mean that. So maybe James thought whatever Jessie is?? which is???? I DON'T KNOW
IS DANNY LETTING ALL HER BRIDESMAIDS SLEEP IN HER BED/ROOM ETC, AND SHE'S IMPLYING CRAIG MIGHT BE THERE TOO WITHOUT THE GROSS IMPLICATION THE OTHERS ARE
"They just got married, I didn't mean that they were going to do anything like that. I meant she'll be just shocked about the marriage," Jessie said.
Oh god Jessie, so naive
"Er, Jess, it's tradition for the married couple to sleep with each other on the wedding night. It's bad luck if you don't," Triah said.
lets hope for bad luck in this case then
Jessie and James looked at each other briefly, and they cringed slightly.
"We didn't know that. We would have had tonnes of bad luck if we did get married," James muttered.
Why cos you didn't know, or cos you both have cooties and ran out of strawberries
I don't get this back and forth with these two after eps like YWF and beginning of Atamit happened.
"Or they might be just like Jessie and James, in other words clueless," Lilly said.
The newlyweds wake up in Craig's quarters, so my theory on wtf Jessie was talking about is out the door
"Er, Craig, what am I doing here?" she asked nervously. She quickly looked down at herself. She was still wearing the clothes from the previous night. So was Craig.
I already knew but PHEW
Baby Don't Swear etc/Witchcraft: helloooo there
"I feel better in knowing that we didn't do anything stupid," Lena said, and she headed towards the door. She didn't notice that somebody had written 'Just Married' on the back of Craig's jacket.
Territory sucks. I suck.
Danny was in the bedroom, getting changed. Jessie was sitting on the sofa with Kirsty. Kirsty had a cute little white dress on, and little white shoes on. She was grinning like a Cheshire cat and she kept clapping her hands.
Jessie wasn't too pleased though, she was wearing the white dress she didn't like. She stood up and she headed over to the mirror. Everything else seemed fine; her hair had been recently dyed brown, with blonde highlights in, it was tied up in a loose pony tail. The thing that bothered her the most was the fact that the dress was tight enough for people to see the small growth of her stomach.
but seriously, this isn't bad. Some thoughts
1) Kirsty is cute, bless
2) Oh I don't suppose Jessie's hairdo is meant to be her actresses hair at the time
3) Unless I was right about the pregnancy happening before The Atamit, that being a red flag (and I doubt/know that), this shouldn't be noticable even to a worrywart like Jessie.
Danny walked in. She did a little pose. "What do you think, Jess?" she asked happily. She had a beautiful long white dress on, with gold glittered patterns on it. Her blonde hair was slightly braided, and she had gold glitter in it.
I OBJECT, THERE'S NO GOLD. I WOULD'VE NOTICED
Danny walked over to Kirsty, and she picked her up. "Is something wrong Jess? I thought I was the one who should be nervous," Danny asked her friend as she sat down.
See, no cares and no one noticed. If Danny hasn't you're fine
Right on cue Lena rushed into the room. She had a much shorter dress on than the other two girls had, but she didn't seem to care.
"Er, sorry I'm late. Is there still time to dye my hair?" Lena asked.
It's not an episode if Lena doesn't change her hair colour
Danny laughed. "If she keeps dying her hair, it will die."
"If you must know. James and I were at that Vegas program, and we must have been far too high on Cherry Coke. We were really close to getting married in one of the chapels," Jessie replied.
Danny stared at her friend in shock. "You were going to get married the night before mine?"
I'm so glad Danny doesn't react with glee. Jessie nearly stole her thunder, that's not cool
Danny and Jessie looked towards Lena, who was standing at the doorway with her now blue hair. It seemed to turn into a lighter blue as it went down to the tips.
For those keeping track I ask you; how many colours has this girl not tried?
"I hate to tell you this Lena, but I wasn't the only one who was careless. You and Craig were drunk to the max, and you got married in the same chapel," Jessie said.
"What!" Lena and Danny exclaimed.
To be fair Lena should be told, but not here.
"No Lena, they won't. I'm going to kill you," Danny said.
"I was drunk, you can't blame me for something I did when I was drunk," Lena said.
"She's got a point," Jessie said.
"You're right, Jess. She was not in control of herself, but you were. How could you do this to me," Danny said.
James shows up way too early to pick up the bride...on purpose
"Yeah but, I just wanted to apologise for last night," James said.
"You shouldn't be apologising to me. I think both of us need to apologise to Danny," Jessie said.
I'd take a sin for this if you hadn't escalated this situation with Lena already.
"I'm sorry for last night, Dan," James said nervously.
"Great, this has been a good day so far," Danny said sarcastically. She walked away from the door as Lena ran over.
I'm real glad the usual one dimensional JJ shipper isn't accepting such piss poor apologies. kudos
"You didn't let me finish. Supposedly the chapel we went to was one of those joke chapels. That so called priest set the place up for drunks, just in case they wanted to do what you and Craig wanted to do," James said.
Courtesy of Tom I bet, the ultimate troll
Though to be fair, I doubt a holodeck Vegas wedding would be legit anyway
"Craig found out about the so called wedding himself, and he contacted the chapel to see if they could get a divorce. They told him," James replied.
Lena turned around to face James and Jessie. "I didn't think he'd do that," she said.
"I was surprised too. He said something like he wanted to at least fix one of his mistakes," James said.
fine, but Craig still ain't forgiven
he told/bragged to James this crap for a reason, it's a cry for forgive and date me pleeeeease, not something he's only done because it's the right thing.
"By the way Jess, you look nice," James said.
"Oh, er thanks," Jessie muttered. She quickly tried to cover her stomach. James didn't notice. "If we do decide to get married one day, there will be a really clear sign. Right?"
A sign, like the ones in Friends? duh
Who cares, wedding time
Harry, Craig, and a few other crewmembers were playing the wedding music. Harry had a saxophone, and Craig actually had a guitar.
hahaha why a sax
haha why Craig at all
Ian took Danny's hand and they stood in front of Doctor Jones, who was in a vicar outfit. James, Jessie, Lena and Kirsty stood at the side near Kyle, Duncan and Meowth. The two boys had cute little suits on, and Meowth had a little bow tie around his neck.
why the f£££ is Meowth invited?
Why is the Doc marrying them? Shouldn't it be the Captain?
Doctor Jones yapped on, and Danny & Ian said their vows, and their "I do's".
Kirsty gave her mother the bouquet. Danny threw the bouquet over her shoulder, and Jessie caught it by accident.
"That isn't a sign," Jessie muttered.
"If that isn't a sign, what is?" James asked. Jessie ignored him.
I'd say this isn't a Friends stolen sign, cos there was no legit wedding there, but I remember Monica catching some flowers because Phoebe spelked herself on its thorns, tossing it away.
and for god's sake James, get on your knees and get it over with
anyone who says "that's what he said" gets a slap
Everyone was dancing to the music. Craig, Harry and the others were playing the instruments, Lena was singing the song
All of them were on the stage. They were performing 'Paradise' by Kaci.
THAT'S NOT A, OR STEPS, OR POKEMON, LION KING SOUNDTRACKS
WTF IS HAPPENING
"James, do you want to get married or something?" Jessie asked.
"What made you think that?" James asked.
Because you asked her after a couple of Cherry Cokes. You weren't drunk.
"I wasn't happy about that. Look, I don't want to get married if that's not what you want," James said.
yeah, that's why you ask them. And you did, she agreed. In neither the Friends ep or this were the couple drunk.
Jessie smiled, and she reached over to hold James' hand. Suddenly the turbolift doors opened, and Doctor Jones, still in his vicar outfit, was in. It looked like the poor pair were at the alter like Danny and Ian were.
now that's a copycat in its "purest" form
The turbolift went into motion. "Look Jess, I said there would be very clear signals, those were just coincidence's."
"Yeah, you're right," Jessie muttered.
Suddenly a weird electric shock came over the two. They had to lean on the turbolift wall to regain their balance.
Oh boy here it comes, the original draft of Territory incoming. I feel dirty already
Suddenly James pushed Jessie into the turbolift wall, and started kissing her.
Thompson and O'Hara came up to the turbolift and they both put their hands on their hips.
"Do you mind, that's our makeout point!" Thompson yelled.
I saw nothing there that showed Jessie reciprocating. At least the last time he did something like this it was onto a bed, she laughed and teased him, this...hoboy.
Jessie glared at James. "Don't ever do that again, you hurt my back!" she yelled.
and it gets worse
"Sorry, I don't know what came over me," James muttered.
"At least give me a warning next time. I think I should get to Sickbay," Jessie said.
Probably bad enough if he were regular, but this guy's got super human strength. How much did he slam her against that wall?
James slowly followed her, feeling really ashamed of himself.
If this is meant to be showing and not telling, it failed, its still telling
secondly, the only clue is "electric shock" that something is wrong with at least him. If that's missed or overlooked, he does not come off well here at all. not good
The pair weren't far from Sickbay when Jessie stumbled a bit. She looked at James. "Did you have to be a bloody Slayer, I think you killed by back," she said. She leaned on the wall for support.
I think at this point you beam her to Sickbay, bloody hell
James went over to her, and he slowly picked her up. "What are you doing, people will see us."
how many times...
They reached Sickbay, and they went in. They stopped once they were inside.
"Damn, not another signal," James said.
are you serious?
are you serious?
this back injury part of the draft only happened because Chandler carries Monica into the flat for some innocent other reason I don't remember, and they both think "ohnoes it's the over the threshold sign"
f$$$me. I don't mind liberties, but Jessie's had her back done in by some overpowered meathead pushing her into a wall for a smooch
Jessie looked at the neighbouring biobed. An unknown crewmember was lying unconscious, she was shivering.
oh yeah, doc mentioned another patient after the at the alter sign
"How did you get here so quick?" James asked.
"My secret, Ensign," Doctor Jones replied
OMG WHAT'S THIS TRANSPORTER TECHNOLOGY, IS IT NEW?
Anyways Doc heals Jessie's back, and thankfully she doesn't let James off easy. she shouldn't. I gotta
Jessie's Sin Points: -1
She thought for a few seconds, and she got a disgusted look on her face.
"What's wrong?" James asked.
"That connection thing is kicking in," Jessie replied.
Oh yeah, that's a thought
Remember when I said this was drafted around the same time as Oasis? What does that and a certain other "episode" where Emma's thoughts can be heard by a girl hanging around James, have in common?
That's right. Mummy ripoffs, the Iinan Saga etc...
Something tells me that this is the source of the Lena/Morgan grossness in Resurrection, and I was lazy enough to keep it in Territory despite the huge gap between events and already having done it. That'll be why Emma has to do something so ott/ooc stupid for this to "work"
So you know what this means, don't you? YEP
Emma thought, "ooh, there's Tom. God doesn't he have a nice a**."
Heh, James better guard his ass.
At least Jessie reacts to this with disgust
"What is she thinking about?" James asked.
"She thinks Tom is cute," Jessie replied.
How nice of her to not go into detail
Jessie thought, "Emma, will you stop looking at Tom's ugly big a**, or I'll do something you won't like."
Emma thought, "like what?"
Jessie still has full control and does the next thing on purpose (sorta omgspoilers)
This kinda proves what I thought about the Morgan kissing James cos she thought he were Harry and she were Emma ?? I dunno if I shared that theory in the Re-Read, instead of only hinting at it in the Reboot.
Anyway back to Fifth Shades of Voyager
yes I know I've made that joke before
Emma thought, "hang on a mo, here comes Harry. I'd love to get a hold of them at the same time."
Chakotay's gonna arrive next, I assume
"I've got an idea to how I can get Emma back," Jessie said.
"Really, how?" James asked.
think about Annika in general? That'll subdue anyone. Still whatever Jessie does makes Emma pass out. I really hope Jessie didn't ask James to off screen her, in the usual way. The scene did end after ^^
"What happened?" Lilly asked.
"You don't want to know," Emma moaned.
I'm sure we do
"James, she's kissing him in Sickbay," Emma said.
Lilly and Lena looked at each other with bemused looks on their faces.
Jessie must have a filthy mind if that made Emma pass out
Tom accidentally overheard and he ran out of the room, nobody noticed. He eventually got to Sickbay and he rushed in. He came to a halt and he folded his arms.
Tom: I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT, FOR ALL MY LIFE
Doctor Jones was working at the console, totally unaware to what was going on. James was pinned down to the biobed, and Jessie was leaning over him, kissing him.
How the hell did the Doctor not notice this, while in the same room?????????
"Ahem, lovebirds," Tom said. Jessie and James quickly got off the biobed, and they stood about two feet away from each other. Doctor Jones turned around, all confused.
only two feet? gosh
"Nothing, just those two were making out on your biobed," Tom said with a smirk on his face.
"Oh not again. They're the second pair today," Doctor Jones muttered. He picked up a tricorder and he went over to Jessie.
okay maybe he did notice but did not care?
"Two friends that you probably don't know were doing the same thing this morning. I scanned them since they said they felt this strange electric shock earlier. Something strange is in their blood and it's making them lose control when nobody is watching them," Doctor Jones said
even though you were in the room, and if my placement of you was right, still very much in eye shot of any of the biobeds.
"So is that why we were.." Jessie asked.
"Yes. The last pair were just friends as well," Doctor Jones replied carefully.
aaw Doc, this is very nice of you
"So all you guys have to do is have somebody watching you at all times," Tom said.
"What, even at night time?" James asked.
ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT
AND OFF SCREEN
"I'll try to keep quiet," Tom said, and he headed out the room.
"That'll be the day," James said.
yeah I'm not gonna hold my breath either
All of the main cast were sitting at the main table. Several people kept glancing at Jessie and James, and then sniggering.
Yup, no surprise to anyone
"When those aliens boarded the ship and performed experiments on the crew," Triah replied.
"If it's the same aliens, then how come the only thing that's happened is drops in temperature, and erm.. " Kathryn said.
Ah good old Season One, where most things happened off screen in between Pokemon battles and mottos. So before Year of Hell and Hunters then... that means
James: shhhhhh, no one can ever know
"Making out," Tom finished. Several people laughed.
"Shut up, Tom," Jessie growled.
To be fair, why would Tom keep this a secret? He hates these two
"Well didn't Tom and B'Elanna have the making out problem in that episode?" James asked.
Tom and B'Elanna looked at each other.
"Crap, I should have known that would be mentioned," Tom said.
bwahahahaha nice one James
"True, but this is embarrassing," B'Elanna muttered.
Too bad Tom's not fussed cos they were dating anyway, ohwell
"I think, Captain, that the aliens are experimenting for a cure in something more specific this time. Last time they claimed to be experimenting for cures for everything," Doctor Jones said.
"Yes, but why did they come back to us?" Kathryn asked.
how is the more appropriate question
Lena gets the cold fever and is ushered to Sickbay. It is designated the hot room for the cold sufferers
If you don't feel cold, make sure you're with at least two other people," Kathryn said.
Okay so I assume the aliens are looking for the cure for the Love Spell, at least. can't blame them.
Anyway the plan is to do the exact same thing as before.
"It's worth a try, this episode is long enough for the first plan to work," Kathryn said.
can't argue with this flawless logic
"If you even attempt it, I will kill the test subjects," the woman said.
It's the same bloody woman too from Scientific Method. Flaming hell, if they concentrated their energies from cloaks and super fast ships, to their health service, they wouldn't need to do this s$$$
Eerie trivia: while writing this Re-Read, my sister tells me she's currently watching Scientific Method. She has no idea I'm doing this. WHAT ARE THE ODDS
In: "Doctor Jones to Bridge. All of my patients have just collapsed, they've been infected with a virus."
James and Jessie collapse off camera, only mentioned when Tom points it out. We're doooooooooooomed
Doesn't matter, the suicide sun plan works again
"Weren't you listening earlier. Tuvok was to scan the ships as they left, to find out how they graft onto Voyager. Once that was known, Tuvok was able to mount a defence so the ships couldn't graft on again," Kathryn replied.
I wasn't "listening" either, but I call bull on this
YUP, NEVER MENTIONED
Finally we're on the last scene. Man Out Of You is so close, I can almost see it
"I just hope that everyone knows it was just an experiment that made us do those things," Jessie said.
James nodded slightly. The table was silent for a few minutes. James reached over and took a hold of Jessie's hand.
Sweet but Jessie's clearly still very private about this. It is just holding hands though, hmm
Jessie noticed that he was looking rather nervous about something. "Why don't we go," he said. He stood up while he still had a hold of her hand.
Ok, at least he's trying not to do anything public. fine
"Yeah ok," Jessie said, and she stood up as well. She tried to walk away, but James didn't move. "What's wrong with you?" she asked.
so much for that
James thought, "it's now or never, lets get this over with."
I know its only his thoughts but SWOOON
He went down on his knee, with everyone still watching. "Jessie, will you marry me?"
Everyone stared in shock at the pair. No one was more shocked that Jessie herself. She looked at the camera. "Freeze frame, please?" The picture seized.
NO JESSIE DON'T, DON'T ASK TO TURN THE CAMERAS "OFF", NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MESS HALL
RIP JESSIE/'S BACK
Yes this is a cliffhanger. Stay tuned for the shortest Season Two episode, the barely worth the bother rip off of Thirty Days.
What will Jessie's answer be?
Why were we cruel enough to give you a cliffhanger?
I'm sorry, all I saw was "why were we cruel" and then my brain froze trying to think of an answer
Will Lena and Craig ever get back together?
Did Craig write this? NICE TRY KID
Does Tani actually have a twin sister called Isabelle?
What? Oh, that stupid hand twin Friends joke. I see what you did there with that name.
Was that a stupid question?
OMG THESE QUESTIONS ARE SO HARD
And will we ever see those aliens again?
Please god no
Muttered Count: 40 (1638)
Lena the Sue Count: 0 (39)
Lena (Child)Abuses Her Power: 0 (36)
Annika Dies Count: 0 (11)
James Dies Count: 0 (5)
James Kill Count: 0 (4) Jessie's back does not count
James Badasses Off Screen For Our Sins: 0 (17)
Just A Little Bit More: 1 (49)
J/C are the worst (grand)parents ever: 0 (39)
Sexist Crap Count: 2 (89)
Jessie's Sin Points: Earned 0, Lost 3 (0) Remember, she has 36 from Season One to still erase.
Marill's Playing With Her Dolls Again: 10 (75)
1) From what I remember, Territory was meant to be about completely different aliens trying to chase Voyager out of their territory, but not in a confrontational way since they were meek and afraid of Voyager. To distract them and/or put them off continuing.
The draft only had the Emma versus Jessie thought battle, and the making out, which I'm not sure was plot related in the first place.
Since the episode wasted a lot of the time with the wedding, the Friends theft, the episode was very long already and so the storyline was not only reduced, but the aliens and concept were cut completely in favour of doing Scientific Method 2 for two scenes, tops. Even though Voyager is thousands of lightyears away rom them. When Mental Illness of Season One was meant to be its replacement.
There's so much wrong with this, it's tricky to know how to mark it.
Territory no longer using the plot that give it its name (1)
Friends being completely ripped off for the vast majority, which ended up with Lena and Craig almost marrying and more whilst drunk (1)
Scientific Method aliens again despite the distance (1)
Emma's story was already a copycat I think, and since Resurrection changed things up again by nicking it, its even more absurd and pointless (1)
2) The best man conversation was stretched out and pointless.
3) Wtf is up with James being shocked that Jessie was asked to be a bridesmaid, and how does he not know Jessie hates dresses
4) The Las Vegas program is pretty much a holiday package to Vegas. Tom did absolutely nothing to this. Why is it his. It's boring and unimaginative
5) Most of the break up and aftermath are dealt with ok. Craig though is an absolute piece of s$$$ to Lena during the plane scenes, for no reason at all other than Ross does it. The thing is Ross does it because Rachel teased him about thinking she was inviting him over for strawberries. Because he was watching her window when she thought she was alone and was naked. He deserved that ridicule, but it makes sense that in his embarrassement he'd do stuff back.
Lena on the other hand has done nothing but dump him. We can all agree he deserved that. It left a bad taste in my mouth.
6) Lena gets a fear of heights out of nowhere. Though I wonder if it's more of a fear of planes.
7) Tani and Ash Ketchum are only in this to do the stupid hand twin gag that everyone hated from Friends. It could've been forgotten about completely, no harm done.
8) Why was Meowth, a talking cat that J/J just met last episode, babysitting Duncan? I didn't see Danny or Ian at this so called bachelor/ette party in Vegas.
9) I get that James would be nervous about asking Jessie to tie the knot. And I know one of the incidents is Friends ripped off. Still how he goes about it is really weird. Randomly asking her when she's gambling, pretending to sober up when she changes her mind, denies the s$$$ out of it but when signs are shown he's like "this seems like a hint", and finally tries to drag her out of the Mess Hall so he can do it in private, only for him to do it anyway in the Mess Hall. wow
10) Under the make out influence or not, James still was very rough with Jessie when he of all people should be careful, and usually is paranoid about his strength. It was all done so Jessie had an excuse to be carried over the threshold and be in Sickbay to be caught by Tom.
11) Also under the influence I guess, and not being controlled by someone elses thoughts, Jessie tries to sicken Emma by making out with James while they're telepathically linked. It's so filthy I assume it makes the definitely not prude Emma pass out.
12) The sun dive works again to thwart the aliens that shouldn't be there. Rushed ending to get to the proposal. At least that's original!?
1) Craig accuses Lena of cheating, she dumps him for not trusting her, he gets all snotty and vengeful, it backfires on him, he grovels and guilt trips, she gives in and pays the price for it later. Craig tries to nice guy fix it, they don't instantly get back together.
Yeah I might not like it, but this looks like it was done exactly right and to plan
2) The beginning of the bridesmaid scene where Jessie is fretting over the dress. I liked how that was written.
3) Danny reacts like a normal person would when their best friend tells them on the morning of her wedding that she nearly eloped the night before. One dimensional shipper Danny at the beginning and middle of the season would've been throwing a party.
Marill's Rating: 17%
Ookay then, were any of my poor quintet guesses right?
Lea Halalela: 33% (guessed 15%)
The Atamit: 19% (guessed 10%)
Return of Third Voyager: 7% (guessed 8%)
Territory: 17% (guessed 5%)
Two out of five ain't bad. I was way off on one of them though 0_0 Anyways....
Rankings So Far:
#02 YWF: 45%
#03 Disconnected: 40%
#04 Kiss of Death, Bittersweet, Suicidal: 38%
#05 Interactions: 37%
#06 The Resurrection: 36%
#07 True Q: 35%
#08 Cause & Effect, Lea Halalela: 33%
#09 Saturday Night, Precise Timings, The Curse of Voyager: 31%
#10 Games Resistance: 29%
#11 Thrown Key Part 2: 23%
#12 F9: Control Failure: 21%
#13 Why oh Why: 20%
#14 The Atamit: 19%
#15 An Apple A Day, Heiress, Territory: 17%
#16 I Know What You've Done This Season: 16%
#17 Halloween: 15%
#18 Dimension Jump: 14%
#19 The Slayers: 12%
#20 The Love Spell: 10%
#21 Return of Third Voyager: 7%
Next Time: One of Tom's episodes gets hijacked, sorta, but at least this way he keeps his Lieutenant rank. It's also the shortest S2 entry AND the eve episode of Man Out Of You, the intruige is killing me.