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Episode Synopsis
While on the way to rendezvous with Zare and Ligod's ship, the Voyager crew take part in various sports to improve team spirit.

Written
28th September, 1st, 18th & 30th October 2004

Episode Based In
June 2372 (early season 3)

The Bridge:
Tuvok walked onto the bridge, with Neelix right behind him.

"I don't think having an eating contest is a very logical solution to the problem," Tuvok said, stepping behind his station.

"Why not?" Neelix asked.

"It would only solve the morale side of it. Eating too much isn't going to reduce crew laziness," Tuvok replied.

"All right, all right. A salad eating contest?" Neelix grumbled.

"Yeah, I win!" Tom yelled out from the helm.

"Only because you cheated with that fire move," Jessie grumbled from the Engineering station.

"That's a special move, it isn't cheating," Tom grinned.

"So Tom's into the Virtual Fight final, who will be facing him?" Danny questioned like an announcer. "Janeway or Harry?"

"I refuse to take part," Kathryn grumbled.

"That's fine, except you'd have to do without the prize," Tom sneered.

"I don't care about winning material goods," Kathryn said.

"All right then, that year supply of coffee icecream is as good as mine," Tom said.

"Thanks a lot Tom," Harry groaned.

Kathryn's eyes lit up, "what are we waiting for? Let's fight!"

Harry sighed, "that means I'll probably have to try." He pressed a few buttons on his console, while Kathryn fiddled with the computer next to her chair.

Tuvok raised his eyebrow as two computer characters faced off on the viewscreen. "What is going on?"

"Go," the computer voice said. The two characters started fighting.

"Come on, come on!" Kathryn screamed.

Harry yawned, "maybe not."

Jessie glanced back at Tuvok, "we're having a tournament, the winner gets a day off tomorrow."

"I thought it was coffee icecream!" Kathryn snapped.

One character stopped dead, the other one kept kicking and punching him. The one Kathryn was obviously controlling dropped.

"Oh well, it's just you and me Tom," Harry said.

Tom snorted, "prepare to get your butt wiped Harry."

Danny giggled, "told you he needed to wear nappies."

Harry stared coldly at her, "do you kiss your mother with that dirty mouth."

"No, we're not that close. Plus I'm not in love with mine like you are," Danny replied.

"Oooh," Tom laughed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Harry grumbled.

"Why are you having a tournament?" Tuvok asked, eyebrow getting higher with each word.

"There's nothing to do obviously. Except we could go to the holodecks, but there's only two," Chakotay replied.

"Now I've just gotten a great idea about what we can do. It'll help morale, get everyone some exercise and will improve team spirit," Neelix said.

"That sounds like a really bad idea," Jessie commented.

"No, it'll be fun," Neelix said.

Later, Holodeck One:
The entire crew had all gathered into a large sport centre's racing track field. Neelix, Tuvok and Chakotay stood facing everyone.

"Welcome everyone to the Voyager Arena!" Neelix bellowed. "While the ship is going through this uninhabited area on autopilot, we'll have our first annual Sport's Week!"

"I knew this would be a bad idea," Jessie muttered.

"We're going though an uninhabited area, on auto pilot with all the crew skiving? That's just asking for trouble," Danny added on.

"Now, we were having trouble choosing a fourth team Captain, as the logical choice would have been Janeway," Chakotay said.

"But we doubted she'd make a good sport's team leader," Neelix finished off.

"Traitors," Kathryn grumbled.

"So we decided that the leader should be the winner of the Virtual Fighter Tournament," Neelix said.

Tom grinned while everyone else groaned in disappointment. "Excellent," he said as he pushed to the front to join the others.

"Now let's choose team members," Tuvok said. "Mr Neelix, you go first, then Chakotay, me and then Mr Paris."

"This'll be a surprise no doubt," Danny sarcastically said.

"Kes," Neelix said grinning.

Kes groaned, "crap!"

Chakotay sighed, "one of the Slayers would be useful for some of the events, so Zare."

Zare looked confused, "I'm only a visitor, I shouldn't even be here."

"That's a logical choice Commander. I choose Mr Taylor," Tuvok said.

"Wow, I was picked first and it wasn't for comic relief, and by Tuvok? Something's wrong," James commented.

"Well the numerous footballs and basketballs in faces did lose it's funniness after... Wait what am I saying?" Jessie muttered.

Danny shook her head, "yes, that's what I was wondering."

Tom frowned, "oh, I wanted to boss him around. Oh well, I choose B'Elanna."

"Ugh great. Thanks Tuvok," B'Elanna groaned.

Later:
Only a few crewmembers were remaining to be picked. One unknown was left, the rest were Jessie, Sid and crazy Paul Foster.

Tom's team were all girls, he had managed to get Lisa, Faye and O'Hara as well as B'Elanna. Chakotay had Harry, Ian, Thompson and Ligod. Neelix had the Doctor, Kathryn, Craig and Clive. Tuvok had Lee, Claire, Danny and the normal Foster.

"Sid," Neelix said.

Chakotay sighed, "Foster."

"Morgan," Tuvok said.

Jessie groaned as she was the only one left, "great, why am I always picked last?"

Tom smiled nervously, "oh Jess, you haven't been picked yet. Great, I choose you."

She glared at him, "why is all the last team leader to pick, the biggest jerks?"

"Well I'm sorry I'm not that runty blonde Slayer guy you're obsessed with. You can go back to following him like a little puppy dog afterwards," Tom grumbled. His eyes immediately widened, "crap, I should stop saying things out loud."

"Puppy dog?" Jessie grumbled.

"Runty?" James questioned, raising his eyebrow.

Zare sniggered from her team, "puppy dog. Couldn't put it any better myself."

Chakotay groaned, "ok, that's enough." He clapped his hands. "Ok attention everyone. Games will begin tomorrow. Today your team leader will discuss with you about the events, and well anything to do with the sport's week. Also he'll choose a first officer, so to speak and assign at least one sport to everyone."

"Commander Chakotay's team, which is called the Blue Team, will gather in Cargo Bay One. Lieutenant Paris' team, aka the Red Team will have Holodeck Two's arena main hall. Mr Neelix's team, the Green Team will use Cargo Bay Two," Tuvok said.

Neelix smiled sheepishly, "I need to keep an eye on my Leola Root crop."

"My team, the Yellow Team, will stay here," Tuvok finished off.

"Can I swap with someone? I want to be with my Laura," Thompson said.

"I would but I'd rather be in Tom's team than Zare's," Jessie commented. Zare rolled her eyes.

Everyone started to clear the room, excluding the Yellow Team.

The next day:
Some of the crew had gathered around the centre of the arena. Tom, Chakotay, Tuvok and Neelix stood in front of them all.

"Ok, a very good first round of female high jumps there. Now it's time for the second round," Tom said.

Chakotay smacked him across the head, "pack that in."

Tom rubbed his head, "ow. Round Two Girls get ready."

Lisa, Zare, Kathryn and Claire "eagerly" emerged from the group.

Kathryn took a look at her competition, "ok, all these girls are a lot younger than me and one is a Slayer."

Zare put her hands on her hips, "uh, excuse me, do you think I'm not young or something!?"

"This isn't a good start," Tom whispered to Neelix.

"Nonsense, this needs a competitive atmosphere," he grinned.

Some unknown crewmember handed Lisa the pole. She stared at it looking rather worried, "ookay, what am I supposed to do with this?"

"Come on Lis! Faye and Jess already backed out," Tom moaned.

"Um, I feel a lot braver now, thanks," Lisa sarcastically said. She held up the pole vertically, ran towards the high jump. At the last second she dropped the pole and ran off into the distance.

"Ooh, zero points," Neelix grinned.

Zare walked over to pick up the pole, "I watched the last lot do it. It can't be that hard." She ran at the high jump and did it no problem.

Chakotay clapped his hands, as did the rest of the Blue Team present. "Good work."

Tom pouting, "having a Slayer doing it, is cheating."

"No it's not, that's just discrimination," Chakotay said.

Zare walked over after picking up the pole again, "yes, and I took offense at that." She knocked Tom out with it.

Kathryn took the pole off her looking nervous. "Do it for the coffee," Neelix called out.

She suddenly looked determined, "I will." She did well until the jump. She crashed right into the bar. "Ow," came the obvious groan. With a thud she landed on the ground nearby.

"Maybe we should put the safeties on after all," Chakotay said, looking concerned.

Zare looked down at Tom, "nah, more fun this way."

Claire picked up the pole, "my turn." She ran towards the jump area, but she forgot to do the actual jump. "What the, crap!"

"Hmm, looks like a gold for the Blue Team," Chakotay smiled smugly.

"Ah but it's time for the guys," Neelix said.

Ian and Craig emerged from the group looking even more "eager" than the girls. "Where's Mr Taylor?" Tuvok asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Woof woof," Tom whispered. Everyone stared blankly. "He's probably with his bitch, you know the puppy dog comment yesterday." Everyone continued to stare blankly. "Ugh, forget it! Now where's my high jumper?"

"Er Tom, you only picked girls for your team, so you have to do all the male events," Chakotay pointed out.

"Oh crap!" Tom groaned, slapping his own forehead.

"There's a lot of that today," Faye commented.

James made his way over to the group, "sorry I'm late. I was watching the Unknowns Ice Hockey Match. Boy, it's a blood bath in there."

Meanwhile:
Clive rushed out of the changing rooms holding a hockey stick, "damn alarm clock." He entered the hockey pitch to find everyone lying on the ground. "Phew, that was a close call."

Back to the High Jump:
"So, was Jessie with you?" Tom asked, raising his eyebrow. Tuvok did the same.

"Yeah, why?" James replied.

"No reason," Tom replied, smiling cheekily at the others.

"Tom," Chakotay called in a sing song voice, handing him the pole. "You're first, entertain us."

Tom took it off him, "ok fine." He ran towards the bar, lifted himself up fine and started to throw himself towards the high bar. A ripping noise distracted him, he tried to look but ended up crashing into the bar.

"Well that was disappointing," Zare muttered.

"Nah, it was mildly entertaining after all," Chakotay said.

Tom pulled himself up, "I did get hit in the head before, you know." He pulled himself to his feet, brushing himself off. "Phew, that bloody hurt." He walked away with all eyes on the rip on the back of his trousers.

"Uh Tom," Neelix stuttered.

"Shh, just keep quiet," James whispered.

Ian picked up the pole. He took a deep breath before running. He placed the pole on the ground to jump but it just bounced back and hit him in the forehead, knocking him out cold.

Zare leaned a little close to James, "looks like you've got no competition either."

"That's good, I always skived high jump," James said.

Now it was Craig's turn. He picked up the pole nervously. "How the hell am I getting out of this?" He started to run but a girl amongst the group caught his eye. He stopped dead. "Here catch," he said to no one in particular, and threw it in a random direction. Tom screamed not very far away as Craig ran towards the group.

James groaned, "great, I have to go get it now." He headed over to Tom's now limp body. Ignoring it, he picked up the pole and headed back to the start. He went to do it, but changed his mind. "Oh screw this, I'll look like a fool." He threw it in another random direction, and walked away.

Tom lifted his head up, "oh that bloody hurt." Of course the pole hit him again, knocking him out.

"How are we going to sort this one out?" Chakotay asked.

"We can rate it on the most amusing," Neelix suggested. "That would be Ian or Tom's, or maybe Craig's."

James pouted slightly, "hey, that's not really fair."

"It is, considering that two out of three of the others did try," Chakotay said.

Tuvok raised his eyebrow, "that's so illogical."

"Um yes. Long jump?" Neelix questioned.

"Hmm," Chakotay sighed.

Later:
Tom groaned, "I wish I picked some guys for the team."

"Come on Tom! We need some entertainment!" Danny yelled out.

Tom pulled a face, "I'll give you bloody entertainment." He started running, he did the long jump normally much to everyone's disappointment.

"Next," Chakotay groaned.

Harry stepped up to the line. He breathed in before pulling a determined face. He charged forward, but tripped over his own feet, landing flat on his face. Blushing, he pulled himself back up. "Can I do that again?"

"Knock yourself out," Tom shrugged.

Harry did it again, but this time he did it right.

"Neelix," Chakotay called.

Neelix pushed through the small crowd wearing a bright green jogging suit. "Ok I'm ready." He ran the course and stopped after the sand part.

"Uh Neelix, you're disqualified," Chakotay muttered.

Neelix turned around, "why?"

"Well you went way passed the white line," Tom smirked.

Neelix blushed, "oh, I thought this was the race. Can I do it again?"

"Nope, disqualified," Chakotay replied, also smirking. He looked over to the crowd, "Lee, you're up."

Lee stepped out, "why was I volunteered for this."

"Because you're a good jumper, black guys are," Tom replied, shrugging.

Zare shook her head, "so if anyone's not you, they get insulted, discriminated against etc. How shallow are you Mister?"

Tom glared at her, "I wasn't being discriminating!"

"Yes you were," everyone muttered in unison.

"Fine," Tom groaned, folding his arms.

Tuvok raised his eyebrow, "I actually chose him because it was the most logical. Mr Foster is afraid of sand, Mr Harrison broke his leg in the hockey incident."

"Why didn't you use James, as a Slayer he's supposed to be good at athletic stuff," Tom said. Zare cleared her throat. He stared at her, "ok ok, I get the point. Jeez!"

"Actually, he probably isn't. At school he only did the sports that involved bats, balls, you know things to defend himself with against the bullies," Danny commented. She sniggered, "oh I said balls, that's a classic." Everyone groaned.

"I did it," Lee said, eyes shifting nervously.

"Uh, no you didn't," Chakotay said.

"Yeah I did it so fast, while you were guys were talking," Lee said. Everyone stared blankly at him. "Oh ok, god. I don't see why we have to do this anyway."

"It's all for the exercise," Neelix grinned.

Meanwhile, in a swimming baths simulation:
Some unknown crewmember got to the top of a diving board. He took in a deep breath before diving off it. Everyone cringed as he crashed instead of splashed.

"Ok, who reprogrammed the diving board to hover over the ground?" Thompson asked. Somebody tapped him on the shoulder, then pointed at the diving board. They watched Sid climb to the top, with a weight attached to a rope wrapped around him. "Oh god."

Back at the long jump area:
"And of course the amusing fatalities," Zare commented, glancing towards Tom.

Tom folded his arms, "hmph, charming."

"Right, we should move onto the girls," Chakotay said.

Tom turned to Faye, "go then."

Faye started shaking, while turning pale. "Um, I don't feel well and my knee hurts, oh and I have a headache." Everyone stared at her. "I'm not just making excuses. Oh all right!" She moved over to the first line, she started running but did all the wrong things but still ended up doing the jump at the end.

Tom cringed, "Faye, you did it all wrong!"

"I don't care, my part is over with," Faye cheerfully said, she walked away while still managing to blush madly.

"Zare," Chakotay called.

Zare groaned, "are you going to make me do every event?"

"No of course not, only crazy people would make Slayers take part in sports such as rugby and er, football?" Harry muttered.

"That's a point, which one's which. We've got Americans and Brits here," Faye questioned.

"When has the word rugby been used in America, yeesh," Tom groaned.

Faye rolled her eyes, "American rugby usually has more padding and everything than the British one. Right?"

Tom glanced over at Zare, she smiled sweetly. "American, definitely."

"Zare, just do the jump," Chakotay grumbled.

"Ok, but I wasn't paying attention to anyone else," Zare sighed. She made her way over to the line. She stared at the rest of the course with a frown, "um, so what exactly do you do? Jump on the lines or something?"

"Ah Chakotay, don't get the alien Slayer to do every event. She's more clueless than Faye and Neelix. It just goes to show that humans can only play human sports," Tom said. Everyone stared at him. "Ok, yeah that was discrimination. but it's true."

"Chakotay, can I take part in this rugby?" Zare asked, again smiling sweetly.

"Sure," Chakotay replied, smiling evily.

A little while later:
Most of the crew were walking around the seating area for one of the halls. The rest of the crew stood in four groups on the fake grass.

"Ok folks, it'll be Red versus Green, Blue verses Yellow. The winners of both will then take on each other!" Tom yelled.

Jessie cringed before slapping Tom across the head, "ow, don't yell in my ear."

Tom pouted, "but everyone had to hear me."

"No one should have to hear you," James muttered.

Tom narrowed his eyes, "how come I can hear you from here?"

"Well you do have really big ears," James replied with a shrug.

"No one makes fun of my ears," Tom grumbled as he turned to his team. "Ok Reds, we must beat the Greens, we need to kick some Yellow's ass."

"Why Yellow? Blue might win that one," Lisa asked.

"I want to show him up ok," Tom said with a pout. "That reminds me," he said, turning to Jessie. "When we do go against the Yellow's, remember Jessie, your job is to distract him, you know when it's his turn to bat."

Jessie raised an eyebrow, "um, you mean like..."

"Yes exactly. Let's do this!" Tom said loudly. Jessie groaned, she slapped him again.

"Why me though?" Jessie moaned. "I'm crap at distraction. Oh wait, hey!" She smacked him again.

Tom pouted again, "oh all right, I'll get Lisa to do all the men distracting. When it's your turn to bat Lisa, do something slutty when you go passed, he'll probably be a good catcher and that'll throw him off."

Lisa giggled, "this should be the best game of Rounders ever." Jessie narrowed her eyes, Lisa spotted straight away and winked at her.

Chakotay walked over in between teams Red and Green, while the other teams headed off. "Red's will bat first, Green spread out." He walked away again.

Jessie quickly walked over to Kes, "Kes, get me out of this. Give me a sick note or something. You know I should be careful."

Kes shrugged, "ok but I can't lie on it, and it has to be read by your team leader."

Jessie turned pale, "you mean Tom?" Kes nodded. "You know, the exercise will do me some good." She rushed over to join the batters queue. Kes smiled as she headed over to her spot.

Neelix glanced around at his team, "ok. I need somebody to throw the ball to the batters. Craig, you can do it."

A little while later:
Faye nervously stepped behind the line, an unknown passed her a bat. She raised it nervously as Craig got ready to throw the ball. He did, Faye swung the bat meekly but it fell right out of her hands. The ball hit the crewmember behind her.

"Faye, go quickly," Tom whispered.

"Oh right," Faye muttered. She started running, but she was forced to stop at the second point as somebody passed the ball back to Craig.

Tom sighed, "next."

Jessie went up to the line and picked up the bat. Nearby Lisa was at the third point talking to an unknown guy. "If you mess up at least two more catches, I'll give you a kiss on the cheek," she said. The guy smiled goofily and he nodded. Lisa shuddered as she turned away.

Craig threw the ball at Jessie, she hit it. Then she threw away the bat and started to run. Tom screamed, "ow, damn it!" He fell to the ground nursing a certain area. She tried not to laugh as she ran to the third point. Lisa got to the end, while Faye only got to the fourth.

"Ah ha, I got away from the creepy guy," Lisa said. The guy waved at her, still smiling goofily. She put on a fake smile and waved back.

"Oh god, soldier down," Tom squeaked from the floor.

Chakotay blew a whistle, "ok change over time!"

"But I was so close to the end," Jessie moaned.

"Yeah me too," Faye groaned. "And I hate catching."

Chakotay groaned, "tough."

Another while later:
Now the Yellow team were playing against the Blue team, with the Yellow's batting.

Harry looked determined as he prepared to throw the ball. James just stood at the line looking rather bored. Harry finally threw the ball, James hit it and it went really far. He just waited a while just to watch a few of the catchers run after it.

"Mr Taylor, would you please. You could get two or three rounders here!" Tuvok called out.

"Ok," James muttered, he just walked around the points, while the others who were there just got to the end.

"Uh, it's stuck in the tree. Surely that's a disqualification or something!" Thompson yelled from the distance.

After a few rounders, the ball was returned to Harry. He just smiled, "I can't wait until Zare starts batting, we'll get those points back."

"You should have ran," Tuvok snapped.

"So, I got about five of them, that'll help us win," James said.

"They have Zare on the team," Claire pointed out.

"Ok, I'll be a catcher or something when it's her turn," James muttered. "I don't like running at rounders, I feel like an idiot."

Tuvok raised an eyebrow, "why, I put you into the racing."

"Oh childhood trauma, and if I'm running with others I'm fine," James said.

It was Danny's turn, she picked up the bat and got ready. Harry threw the ball at her, she managed to hit it and she ran off with the bat, she ran back and put it down. She then continued. The ball stopped nearby Harry's feet.

"Harry, get it quick!" Chakotay yelled.

Harry's eyes were now wide and watering, lips trembling. He collapsed onto his knees, covering a certain area with his hands.

"Great more points, keep going Danny!" Claire yelled, while the male part of each team grew uncomfortable watching Harry.

About ten minutes later the teams had changed places, Harry was being escorted out via a stretcher, he had an ice pack where his injury was.

"Damn it, we're not doing too well," Chakotay commented. "Zare, hit it as hard as you can ok."

"Yes boss," Zare muttered sarcastically. She raised the bat as James got ready to throw it at her. He threw it, she hit it as hard as she could but he just jumped to catch it. She just managed to get to the first point before someone told her to stop. "What, I hit it hard!"

"Think of it as revenge," James commented.

"For what?" Zare grumbled, folding her arms in a huff.

Neelix blew the whistle, "all right round one is over."

"Finally, the nightmare ends," Ian sighed in relief.

"Actually not really, the winners have to play against each other," Tom said, he also had an ice pack. He turned around, "judge, who's playing?" A holographic referee walked over.

"It'll be Red V Yellow," he replied.

"Yes, team let's kick some Yellow ass," Tom said.

"Um Tom, James and Danny helped win when they were batting, and because James was doing the throwing to the batters, the Blue's didn't stand a chance," B'Elanna said.

"How did Danny help again?" Tom asked. He turned pale, "oh yeah, get a girl to do our throwing."

"Well yeah, you're the only guy," B'Elanna muttered.

Tom blushed, "that's right, any volunteers to be the thrower person?"

"I guess I could do it," B'Elanna sighed.

Tom smiled, "right thanks, now we need to figure out how to stop Mr Freak."

"Um we could first get a good thrower when he bats, and when it's our turn to bat make sure the ball goes right for him," Jessie said.

Tom stared blankly, "ok even a rookie knows that's just going to make things worse. Are you on our team or what?"

Jessie groaned, she did a fake salute, "sir, yes sir."

"She was only kidding, jeez lighten up," B'Elanna muttered.

"No she wasn't. Now Jess, when he runs do the distracting thing. Do anything just make sure it stops him," Tom said.

"That's cheating," B'Elanna said.

"No it's not when you have to suffer," Lisa muttered as she wiped her lips. "Ugh, that guy must never wash his face."

"Great, Jessie just grab him and do your thing. That's suffering," Tom said.

"My thing?" Jessie said.

"Yes, the stuff you do with him all the time," Tom said.

"Have an argument?" Jessie said, pretending to sound confused but still clenching her fists.

"No I was going to say stick your tongue down his throat, but that's easily noticed and will get you disqualified. Just smack his butt or something," Tom said.

"I'll do that," Lisa blurted out.

Jessie glared at her, "which one?"

"Both if I have to, I need that other guy off me fast," Lisa replied.

"Oh ok," Jessie said, she punched her in the face.

"Um," Tom stuttered. "Oh great, I was going to use her to distract the other guys."

"What like gay Lee, married Tuvok and weirdo Foster?" B'Elanna muttered.

"Good point," Tom nodded his head. He clicked his fingers, "we need a medic over here."

"Make that two," Jessie said, moving her glare to him.

"Woah chill," Tom stuttered, backing off.

"They usually cheat Tuvok, maybe we should," Lee said at the other side of the field.

"If they cheat they'll get disqualified, we don't need to," Tuvok said. "Mr Taylor, you do the same thing again when it's their turn to bat."

"All right, but it's not considered cheating if I accidentally throw the ball at Tom's head or something, is it?" James questioned.

Tuvok raised his eyebrow, "I'll ignore that. This time just run, I'll put some of our worst batters in front so you won't have to run alone."

"Great, thanks," James said.

"Who are our worst batters?" Claire asked.

"Foster and Williams," Tuvok replied.

"Hey," Lee moaned. "I'm great at this game." Everyone but Tuvok sniggered quietly.

A little while later the game was on. The Red's were batting.

"Ok Jess, remember what I said, this time don't throw the bat at me," Tom said.

"Ruin my fun," Jessie pouted.

Tom walked back over to the rest of the team, "fingers crossed that freak will take it easy on her."

James overheard, "hey, I heard that."

Tom turned around, "uhoh, Jess hit it hard and aim for him, forget what I said."

Jessie rolled her eyes as she picked up the bat, James watched her nervously. He prepared to throw the ball. He threw it lighter than usual, she just panicked and moved out of the way. The guy behind her caught it.

The referee groaned nearby, "let's do that again."

"That still counts, go Jess," Tom muttered.

"No it doesn't," referee said.

"Damn this is just like being at school again," Jessie said quietly to herself.

Tom smiled, "he threw it lightly, just stay calm ok."

"I'd feel better if I could throw the bat afterwards," Jessie said. She glanced back, "just kidding."

Tuvok walked over, "we should swap throwers just for this one turn."

"What, why?" James asked.

"You know why, you swap places with Williams," Tuvok replied. Lee pulled a face as he walked over to where James was. Tuvok returned to his spot. James groaned as he headed over to one of the points.

Tom groaned, "damn it. We lost our only shot."

Lee picked up the ball, he threw it at Jessie. She hit it and ran, almost forgetting to drop the bat as well. Lee caught it just when she got to James' point.

"Ok next," Tom sighed.

B'Elanna stepped up to the line. Lee glanced around nervously, "um ok, I'm doing it again." He threw the ball, she hit it and ran off. Faye walked up next, she just managed to hit the ball and ran off too.

Tom groaned, "for god's sake."

"And then he said I should smack your ass or something, then Lisa said she'd do it," Jessie was saying to an uncomfortable James. B'Elanna and Faye stood at the previous points looking not very happy.

"Uh Jess," James muttered.

"Shh," Danny shushed.

"What?" Jessie said, glancing at her then back at James.

"My team's going to hate me but you have to run," James said.

"Just run passed her," Tom grumbled.

Chakotay blew the whistle, "ok everyone stop. That's the end."

Tom groaned as he fell onto his knees, "ok if we've lost, I'm blaming it on you Jessie."

Jessie pouted, "but, you wouldn't get whole points when you continue your run later."

"B'Elanna and Faye may have got full rounders though, well done," Tom grumbled.

"I didn't know, I thought they could go passed while I'm here," Jessie said.

"Tom shut it, she had important things to tell me," James lied.

Jessie glanced at him briefly, "yes, important things."

The referee stepped forward, "Yellow wins."

"Aaagh, damn it," Tom groaned.

Chakotay clapped his hands once, "so, what's next?"

Later, Holodeck Two:
The Red and Blue team were in the middle of a rugby, or for any Americans reading football match.

Somebody passed the ball to Tom, he panicked as he saw Zare coming towards him. He threw it away, but Zare still jumped at him, knocking him to the ground.

Neelix used the whistle again, "Miss Zare, would you please stop tackling everyone."

"Why, I thought this whole thing was for fun?" Zare pouted.

"Continue," Neelix sighed. He blew the whistle.

Zare shrugged, "I love this game." She ran off.

Harry meanwhile passed the ball to Ian, he ran down the field but was pushed to the ground by B'Elanna. He quickly threw it, Ligod caught it. He smiled evily, he threw it in Jessie's direction, she stumbled backwards a little looking startled. B'Elanna waved her hand at her, she threw it at her.

"What are you doing, Jessie's on the other team," Ian said.

Ligod pretended to look shocked, "oh sorry, I forgot."

Faye stopped nearby Jessie, "are you ok?"

"Yeah, wasn't expecting it," she replied. They split up.

Zare watched Ligod watching her, she narrowed her eyes.

Harry passed him the ball. He ran down the field with it, he then threw it back the way he came, confusing everyone who saw it.

Zare watched it, she then noticed it was going towards Jessie, who wasn't really paying attention. She ran over to her as fast as she could, once she got to her she pushed her to the ground. The ball just flew passed them and crashed into the wall nearby some other people. Neelix blew the whistle again.

"Ok, they told you not to tackle anyone," Jessie said, looking more startled than before.

Zare sighed as she sat up, James rushed over to them. "That ball was going towards your head, I had to," she said.

"Thanks Zar," James said as he knelt down next to them. "Are you all right?" He helped Jessie sit up.

Zare stood up, her eyes fixed on Ligod. He was giving her a cold look. She was about to walk over when Neelix came up to them. "What on earth happened there?" he asked.

"Ligod, he threw the ball twice at her," Zare replied.

"Ligod? Why would he?" James questioned.

"I don't know," Zare muttered.

Jessie sighed, "he isn't keen on me, he was acting creepy when I last talked to him."

Tom, Chakotay and the referee walked over. "Can you get him disqualified, at the very least?" Neelix asked.

The referee shook his head, "no, it looked like an accident to me, he is new to the game."

"No, I saw him, he was watching her like he was planning murder or something," Zare said.

"I doubt throwing the ball at her would have killed her though," Chakotay said.

"Jessie, you can rest at the side if you want, I'll get someone else to play for you," Tom said.

"Yeah thanks," Jessie said.

Tom, Chakotay and Neelix headed away, the referee just shook his head. "Miss Zare, one more unnecessary tackle and you're disqualified." He walked off too.

"That wasn't unnecessary," Zare grumbled.

James helped Jessie get to her feet. "Thanks again," he said.

"No it's ok, I owe you guys one after all," Zare said.

James looked confused, "you do?"

"Well you know, that incident before we went to that planet," Zare said quietly. "I don't know why I did it, so..."

"Well at least you're admitting it now," Jessie said.

"But you're still mad at me," Zare said.

Jessie shrugged. James smiled as he guided her to the side benches. Zare went over to the huddle nearby.

Jessie glanced over at the water tank thing nearby, she shuffled over to get to it. James watched her as she filled one plastic cup, then he noticed two of Ligod's companions watching them nervously right next to the tank, they rushed off. He took the glass off of her.

"Hey, if you want a drink just ask," Jessie said.

"No, we both don't want it," James said, he dropped the contents onto the floor and he followed the guys. He picked up speed to catch up with them, he grabbed one and pushed him against the wall. "Ok, what's in it?"

"What are you talking about?" the guy against the wall stuttered, not daring to look at him directly.

"Well Ligod was intent on getting her out of the match, and then you guys are near the water. What did you do to it?" James questioned.

Meanwhile Ligod got in front of Faye and got the ball, he was about to throw it when Zare tackled him hard into the ground. Neelix blew the whistle.

"Ok, what are you up to!?" she asked angrily.

"Ow, what are you on about?" Ligod grumbled.

"Jessie, why were you trying to hurt her?" Zare asked.

"I wasn't, she wasn't doing much, I was just trying to involve her in the game," Ligod replied.

Chakotay walked over, "Zare, get off him."

"Ok ok, but Ligod's not involved in this," the guy against the wall said as Jessie walked over.

"I don't believe that," she said.

"He just mentioned to us that you should stay out of a dangerous sport like this, he doesn't want anything to turn the Slayer," the guy said.

"So, what are you up to then?" James asked.

"We're um, we think Ligod's just gotten soft on his Slayers recently. We're trying to fix everything," the other guy replied.

"So there is something in the water?" Jessie asked.

The other guy nodded, "it shouldn't affect anyone else, it's designed to target just you. It would kill you slowly."

"What are you doing?" the guy against the wall stuttered.

The other guy smiled, "sorry, gotta go." He turned around but bumped right into Zare.

"I've just been disqualified," she said sweetly, she grabbed a hold of the guy by the neck.

"Ok, you two should um, calm down," Jessie said nervously.

"Why, these two just tried to kill you," Zare said.

Tuvok stepped in between them. "There will be no more violence, Mr Taylor and I will put these two in the brig."

"Yeah ok, but we should sedate them just in case," James said. He let go of the guy, he backed off a little and punched him hard in the face. He turned to Zare, "that one too."

"I said no more violence," Tuvok said. He took a hold of the conscious one, he pulled him away after Zare let go of him. James groaned, he started dragging the other one by the arms.

"Jess, just in case, make sure no one drinks that," James said.

"Yeah ok," Jessie said, she rubbed the front of her neck. "So glad you noticed."

"So am I, I'll be back ok," James said. He continued to drag the other guy out.

Jessie sighed, "I doubt it'll hurt anyone else, just me."

Zare stared at her, "what makes you so special?"

Jessie stared back at her looking nervous, "uh, no reason." Zare continued to stare at her, looking puzzled.

Later that night
The Mess Hall:
Two pool tables had been set up in the middle of the room. At one table Tom and James were playing, of course Tom was winning. At the other table Zare was playing against Clive.

Tom walked around the table smiling smugly, he took another shot which went straight into the corner pocket. "Hmm, all I need to do is pot the black and that's game over."

"Thank god, that'll be me done for today," James commented, folding his arms.

Tuvok nearby raised his eyebrow. "Why did I choose him to play pool? I played against him before."

"Hmm, not very logical was it?" Neelix said in a teasing voice. Chakotay nearby was fuming. "One Slayer has no idea what she's doing, the other one just likes to cause casualties."

Nearby two crewmembers picked up a stretcher, Ligod was lying on it with a ball imprint on his forehead. They passed Jessie, who stopped them. "Hmm, maybe this'll help," she said as she pressed her hand against the forehead.

"Don't, he's probably already got brain damage," one crewmember moaned.

"Oh, that's what I was helping with," Jessie said sweetly, she poked Ligod in one eye. The crewmembers quickly carried him away from her. They passed Zare, she patted one crewmember hard on the arm which made him lose the grip on the stretcher.

Chakotay groaned, "would you two stop it!"

"What, I've been wanting to hurt him for months," Zare commented. She glanced at Clive, "quickly, can I have a turn?"

"No, I haven't missed yet. Just hit him with the cue," Clive replied.

"Excellent," Zare's eyes lit up. James nearby looked over with the same look. The crewmembers quickly got Ligod out of the room.

"Ah ha, I win!" Tom yelled out. "The better man won."

"I didn't get to hit Ligod with the cue, who should I hit instead," James muttered, looking at Tom.

"Ok ok, the better guy at pool won," Tom stuttered.

Zare walked over to the rest of the team Captains. She held out her broken cue, "um, I broke it."

"How did you do that, you haven't played in five minutes," Chakotay questioned.

"Oh, he won," Zare replied.

"Huh, what does that have to do with the broken cue?" Chakotay asked. Everyone looked over at where Clive was before, they looked down at the ground and found him on the floor unconscious.

"Oh god, call Sickbay again," Harry stuttered.

Much later that evening:
"No why should we do this again?" Faye groaned.

Tom raised the microphone he had as he stepped further onto the stage. "Because it's a lot of fun, that's why."

"I'd rather be in that Jacuzzi I saw," Jessie commented.

"Nah, I'd rather be here," James said.

Jessie shrugged, "safeties are on in the relaxing and changing rooms."

"Oh, but still, I'd rather be here," James said.

"What's wrong with water?" Ian asked.

"I'll answer that if you tell me what's wrong with Inspector Gadget?" James muttered.

Danny sniggered, "great name."

Ian ignored her and blushed, "he's creepy ok."

Jessie pulled a face at Danny, "one of these days I'm taping your mouth shut."

"Ok up first is Faye singing Sound of the Underground," Tom said.

Faye turned pale, "what, who did that?"

Lee sniggered, "I could have chose a worse song."

"Come on Faye, the song is easy," Tom teased.

"No it's not," Faye pouted.

"I'll do it with you if you want," Claire whispered.

"No, I didn't volunteer," Faye muttered, folding her arms.

"We'll call her up later ey? Next, I mean first up is James and Jessie, with My Prerogative," Tom said, sniggering slightly.

"Ok, who's volunteering everyone?" Jessie grumbled.

Danny tried to look innocent, failing of course, "I was going to put down a cheesy love ballad, but I'm not that cruel." Jessie elbowed her in the arm.

"Come on guys, it's the Britney version," Tom called.

"I didn't even know there was one version, let alone two," James muttered.

"This is going to be great then," Ian sarcastically said.

"They usually give you the worst. Let's get this over with," Jessie groaned. She stepped closer to James so she could whisper in his ear, "we can go to the Jacuzzi after volunteering Danny."

"Hmm, brilliant," James sarcastically muttered.

Ian nudged him with his elbow, "what's wrong with you? Jacuzzi with your girlfriend, pretty sweet if you ask me."

Luckily Danny wasn't listening, "I might sing Chewing Gum."

James and Jessie looked at her, worried. They headed for the stage anyway.

Half an hour later:
Kathryn was now on the stage swaying to U Sure Do.

"Coffee sure makes me feel really thirsty," she 'sang'. "It sure does." The music faded out. A few people clapped slowly as she got off the stage.

Tom got onto the stage with a bemused expression on his face. "Um ok, that was Janeway doing U Sure Do by Strike, with some new lyrics. Now it's time for Danny."

Danny giggled as she rushed to the stage. Tom nervously handed her the microphone. Some cheesy music started playing, she started singing along. "Ah ah, ah ah. Hey Danny."

Ian groaned, "I knew I shouldn't have let her listen to my album collection."

James, Jessie and Kes stared at him. He blushed again, "I mean my friends collection."

The next day:
A lot of the crew were gathered in one of the main holographic stadiums. The ground had painted tracks, in the centre of the track there was people throwing javelins.

"And now it's time for the second round of four hundred metres," the referee said.

B'Elanna, Jessie, Kathryn, Craig, James, Lee, Foster and Zare made their way over to the starting points.

"On your marks, get set..." Tom said nearby, holding a fake gun in the air.

"Uh, it's not marks or set," James said.

"Oh, sorry," Tom said. He failed to notice James smirking a little. "Um, on your marbles? Get shaky, go!" Everyone started running. He smiled, "I like my version."

Kathryn stopped half way, sniffing the air. "There's a coffee around here somewhere," she said. She spotted Chakotay sitting down at the side sipping on a cup. She ran over, snatched it off him and drank some of it.

"Uh that's not coffee," Chakotay stuttered.

Kathryn pulled a face, "eeew, what is this?"

"Herbal tea," Chakotay cringed.

"So who has the coffee?" Kathryn asked.

Foster meanwhile collapsed near the end, breathing heavily. Jessie had stopped nearby him. B'Elanna, James and Zare were in the lead, with Lee and Craig far behind them. They got to the end but it was very close.

"Ref?" Tom questioned, crossing his fingers.

The referee put down his advanced looking binoculars. "B'Elanna first, Zare second, James third, Lee."

"Yes I get the idea," Tom said. He grinned, "yes, we won again!" B'Elanna walked over to him.

"Don't you mean I won," she said.

"Well we've just got two more events left, I'm sure. What are they?" Harry asked.

"Three actually. Bowling, tennis and football," Tom replied. "Bowling then football, last is tennis."

"You mean soccer," Harry said.

Tom sighed, "yes."

"Great, I'm going for a break," Harry said, he walked off.

James walked over to Jessie as she got her breath back. "Hear that, we're done," he said.

Jessie's eyes lit up, "oh thank god." She put an arm around his, "let's go check out the Jacuzzi, I haven't yet." She dragged him away.

"Great, so the torture isn't over for me," he muttered.

"Ok, but can I just go?" Jessie asked sweetly. "I've had a hard couple of days."

"I wasn't going to stop you, I just don't want to go in," James replied. Jessie just grinned, she continued to drag him away with her.

Chakotay sighed as he walked over, "so where are we doing the bowling?"

The Relaxing Rooms:
James stuck his head around a doorway, he had a quick glance around before walking into the room. "No one's here."

Jessie followed him in, she rushed into a nearby stall.

"You'd think this place would be busier than this," James said.

"Maybe most of them aren't finished yet," Jessie's voice said. "Ugh, it's just like a long week of PE lessons for me, so glad it's over."

The steam room door opened. Kathryn stepped out of it only wearing a swim suit, and of course was a bit wet from the steam. "Needs more coffee," she said, which caught James' attention. He didn't dare turn in her direction. She meanwhile hadn't noticed him, she poured a flask of strong coffee into a funnel thing that was attached to the steam rooms wall. She then spotted him, "oh hi James. You should try this, it's so relaxing."

He looked nervous, "uh I'm not a big fan of steam rooms, or Jacuzzi's or any kind of water for that matter. Oh and I'm not James." He heard a snigger come from Jessie's stall.

"Don't be silly. I'd recognise that voice and that hair any day. Suit yourself though," Kathryn giggled. She went back into her coffee steam room.

Jessie stepped out from the stall wearing her own swimsuit. She headed over to the Jacuzzi and climbed in.

Harry walked in carrying a towel, he eyed James funny before glancing briefly at Jessie. "So, this is what you do in your spare time, perv on girls?" he muttered.

"Shut up Harry, he's here to smack pervs, not be one," Jessie said. "Speaking of which, you looked at me."

Harry backed off as James started smiling at him. "Why don't you smack your own pervs, which I'm not."

Jessie pouted, "it's too cold to get out again."

Harry shook his head, he went into one of the stalls. Minutes later he emerged and headed for the steam room.

"Uh I wouldn't go in there," James said.

Harry glanced at him with wide eyes, he covered up his bare chest with the towel. "Aaah, don't look at me!"

"I'm not and gladly, but don't go in there," James said, still with his back to the steam room.

"Oh you'd like that wouldn't you," Harry said, he opened the steam room door while still watching him.

James glanced back over at Jessie who was trying not to laugh. "Tell me Jess, would a girl want to look at that, let alone a straight guy?"

"Harry you need to lose some weight, guys shouldn't have those," Jessie replied.

Harry stuck his nose in the air, "I bet he's no better." He walked inside the steam room. James and Jessie heard him scream. He ran back out, "oh my god!"

"Told ya," James said. "Any guy who isn't Chakotay who sees that lose their straightness after a while. Why do you think I'm facing away from the steam room."

Jessie giggled, "that's harsh."

"Why didn't you warn me?" Harry snapped. "God, she was licking her hand, plus it stinks of coffee in there!"

"She put coffee in the water," James said.

"Oh that explains it," Harry shuddered. He made his way over to the sauna nearby.

"Maybe you should try this, it's nice plus no one else will accuse you of perving," Jessie said.

"Uh Jess, you do know who I am right," James muttered, as he walked over. "Remember I'm James, your annoying freak of a boyfriend who hates water."

"I know and yeah right," Jessie said. "Just put your feet in at least, it's like a massager. Its got to be better than those sonic showers."

"All right I'll try it," James sighed. He sat down near the edge. After removing his trainers and rolling his trouser legs up to knee level, he slowly put his feet into the water, while pulling a few faces. Jessie smiled as she moved so she could sit in between his legs, she put an arm around one.

"See, not so bad is it," she said.

"Yeah, but I'm never doing it on my own," James replied, looking uneasy still.

Danny and Ian walked in. Danny immediately started smirking. "Take it off," she called out loudly. James and Jessie glanced over at her, Ian did too with a frown on his face. "I was talking to you and James, and I was talking about tops," she whispered. Ian's frown turned into a pout. "Ok, just you."

Harry walked out of the sauna, he spotted the newcomers and covered himself again.

Meanwhile in the other relaxing rooms in Holodeck One:
Tom, Craig, Neelix, Lisa, an unknown girl and Ligod were all in the big Jacuzzi. Neelix was fast asleep, Ligod was busy reading a book while the others just sat there in silence.

"Don't touch the pan," Neelix said in his sleep. He then woke up, "oh what a dream." He looked around at everyone. "Oh, you weren't all here before. I don't suppose you want me to turn this thing on, do you?" Everyone pulled a face as they looked at the bubbling water, it wasn't long until Neelix was on his own again. "Obviously not," he said.

Holodeck Two:
Danny walked out of one of the stalls, she spotted Jessie drying her hair and a few unknown girls nearby doing the same thing. "Hey Jess," she said. The girls laughed in an annoying way and continued chatting.

"Don't you just love girly girls," Jessie said through a fake grin.

Danny walked over to her. "Just as much as I love girly boys, like Harry."

"And then he said that he'd buy me it for my birthday," one girl said. The others screamed.

"Hey Jess, I have blonde hair," Danny said, she said elbowing Jessie in the arm. She caught on, they both screamed mockingly. The girls stared at them in disgust.

James popped his head out of one of the stalls by the wall, "please tell me no-one's getting killed, unless it's Tom screaming again."

Jessie smiled, "no just some girls, you know rich type spoilt girly girls."

"Ah got ya, I'm not getting out of here in a hurry that's all," James said before disappearing again.

Danny smiled, "ah so James is in one of the sonic showers ey?"

"Uh yeah, not all guys just spray themselves after sports," Jessie muttered.

Danny smiled deviously. She tip toed her way over to the stall, she gently nudged the door making it move a little. "Score it's not locked, revenge time."

Nearby, an oblivious Jessie tied her hair into a pony tail. She jumped as yelling started coming from the stall. Danny rushed away from it blushing with a smirk on her face.

"What's going on?" Jessie asked as Danny walked in front of her.

"Just getting my revenge, people should lock their doors," Danny said, getting redder with each word.

Jessie's eyes widened, "oh my god, the shower thing, you saw him?"

"Oh yeah, I saw him all right," Danny giggled. She patted her on the arm, "you're in for a treat Jess."

James stormed out of the stall, not looking at all amused. "Danny!"

She turned around trying to look sweet, "yes?"

"What are you doing?" James asked loudly.

"Jessie asked me to check you out for her," Danny replied.

Jessie slapped her arm, "no I didn't!"

"Ok, tell me you kept your eyes up or straight ahead," James grumbled.

Danny shrugged, "what would be the point of that?"

Jessie groaned, "she's getting her own back for when you accidentally walked in on her."

"What? I didn't even see anything. I was in and out of that room so quickly, it was like a flash to me," James muttered.

Danny burst out laughing, "oh yeah Jess, you're a lucky girl." She turned around again and came face to face with a stony glare from Jessie. "Ok chill, I was joking. Obviously you didn't get it."

"I'm out of here," James grumbled as he walked off.

"You're lucky I'm finished for the day," Jessie said.

Later:
"Please," Tom said as he knelt down. "Jess please, O'Hara hurt her arm in the bowling event."

Jessie pouted, "but I was finished."

"Thanks," Tom said, handing her a tennis racket. He rushed away.

"But I didn't agree," Jessie groaned.

Danny and Kathryn were playing at a tennis court nearby. Danny missed, she groaned as Kathryn looked smug. "Ah, this is so unfair," she said.

"Next match. Jessie V Clive," the referee said.

Jessie groaned as she walked into the court, "ok Mister, let's make this quick."

Five minutes later:
Jessie threw the racket down, "I hate this game!"

"Is that because you lost?" Clive asked.

Jessie glared at him, "no because." She picked the racket back up, "let's play another game shall we." She ran around the net and started chasing him.

"All right, so that's that. We'll let the computer tell us the results when everybody meets in the main hall," Chakotay said. "Five minutes?"

"Give me ten," Jessie said as she stopped to catch her breath. She started running after Clive again.

Kathryn walked over to Chakotay, "I see she's still getting mood swings."

"I thought this was how she usually behaved," Chakotay muttered.

Ten minutes later:
The entire crew had gathered in the large hall. "So computer, who is the winner of Voyager's first Sport's Week?" Chakotay asked.

"The winner is... the Yellow team with a total of twelve wins," the computer replied.

"What? I demand a recount," Tom moaned.

"It's an advanced computer system Tom," Chakotay muttered.

"Yeah, it must do it too fast," Tom said.

Neelix put an arm around him, "don't worry Tom, there's always next year."

"Um no there isn't, I don't think any of our yearly traditions have made it into a second year," Tom said.

"Hmm you're right, but at least this last few days have given the crew some exercise. And of course learned some team work," Neelix said.

"And one nearly got murdered," Jessie grumbled.

"Don't worry Jessie, I'll make sure those two and Ligod get what they deserve when we get back," Zare said.

"Oh, you're leaving?" James questioned.

Zare nodded, "Ligod wanted to wait until the end of this sports thing."

"Are we sure that Ligod was involved though?" Danny asked.

"There's no real proof but I think he was," Zare replied. "Either way, he's getting a beating. I'd better go."

"You take care ok," James said.

Zare smiled, "you too, same to you Jessie."

"Yeah thanks," Jessie said.

"Oh and if you ever figure that Chosen mystery out, let us know somehow," Danny said.

Zare raised an eyebrow, "ok but I think you guys will be too far away by the time we do." She headed away, "bye guys."

Zare walked out of the holodeck, she frowned and glanced around as she did. She turned around to walk down the corridor, something small hit her in the back. A few seconds later she collapsed.

Ligod and his two buddy's walked over to her, Ligod was holding a rifle. "God, I was worried it wouldn't work," one of the guys said.

"Don't be stupid, it was enough to knock out a small Fardehn. Pick her up and let's go," Ligod said. The guys did as they were told, Ligod lead them down the corridor.

****THE END****

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