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Something New

Episode Synopsis
It's the week of Janeway and Chakotay's long awaited wedding, and everyone's invited including family, exes, party crasher guards, a streaker, the drink spiker, and lots of little kids running around. Chaos? You betcha.

Written
28th, 29th May & 1st June 2004

Episode Based In
March 2380

 

Voyager, the bridge:
Kathryn stepped out of her Ready Room with a big smile on her face. "Andrea, the ship is yours now for eleven days, I hope you can handle it."

"I'm sure I'll live," Andrea muttered.

"What's going on anyway? Have you found a new coffee supply somewhere?" Emma asked.

"If she did I wouldn't be leaving either," Chakotay said.

"Remember, the Lyrithiens are very sensitive to bright lights so lower the lights and..." Kathryn said.

"And keep them away from the broken old TV in the Mess Hall, I remember fine," Andrea said.

"Good," Kathryn smiled. She glanced at Chakotay, "ready to go?"

"If you are then I am," Chakotay replied.

"Well I'm kinda ready but the earlier the better," Kathryn said. She headed for the turbolift, Chakotay quickly followed her.

Bryan waited until the turbolift doors closed before speaking, "so, what do you think's going on?"

"Typical Paris, so nosey," Andrea groaned.

"Yeah like you're not wondering what this is about either," Jodie muttered.

"I am curious yes, but I'm professional about it," Andrea said. She turned to her, "can you let me know where they go, when they go?"

Jodie grinned, "I thought you'd never ask."

Earth, Lena/Sandi's flat:
Sandi grabbed a hanky from the coffee table nearby, Lena watched her with a raised eyebrow. "It's so sad."

"How, it's a good ending right?" Lena questioned.

Yasmin woke up just then, "what, I was awake I swear!"

Sandi groaned, "the series was on for ten years, it was so sad in a way when it ended."

"But it ended less than 150 years before you were born," Lena muttered.

"Yeah but it did take me ten years to watch it all in the right order," Sandi said.

Yasmin yawned, "so what happened after the brief making out?"

"Er, the final episode," Lena replied.

"Oh, doesn't matter, the series was so boring. Nobody really died," Yasmin said.

There was a knock on the door. "I'll get it," Lena said, shaking her head. She climbed off the sofa, then walked over to the door. She smiled as she opened it, "hey mum, hey dad."

"Hey Lena, is Yasmin still living with you?" Kathryn asked.

"Well obviously, Kevin kept hitting on me the freak," Yasmin muttered.

Kathryn and Chakotay walked into the flat, Lena closed the door behind them. "So, what's up?" she asked.

"Well we've got a bit of news," Kathryn replied. "The less shocking part is that we'll be spending the rest of the week in a nice place in Durham."

"That is shocking. Durham was a dump when I visited it," Sandi commented.

"That's because nobody could be bothered to fix it back up after the third world war," Chakotay said.

"Why are you going there exactly?" Lena asked.

"Well it ties in with the main news," Chakotay replied.

Yasmin stood up, "which is what?"

Chakotay put his arm around Kathryn, "we're getting married, again."

Lena stared at them in shock, "what, are you drunk?"

"Nope, not this time," Kathryn replied.

"Oh well that's great news then," Lena said.

Yasmin sat back down, "ohno, I'll probably have to wear a dress."

"Sorry honey but you will," Kathryn said.

Sandi looked confused, "so you're staying in Durham because?"

"Because there's a lovely old cathedral we want to get married in. Also there's a lovely castle nearby for the after party," Kathryn replied.

"Oh and we kind of have a place where Kathryn and obviously the bridesmaids can get ready before going to the cathedral. Since we've booked a place at Durham to stay for the week, we'll have two places," Chakotay said.

"Kind of?" Yasmin muttered.

Kathryn looked nervous, "you're the second bunch we've told and James is next."

Yasmin's eyes lit up, "ooh can I come and watch?"

Chakotay rolled his eyes, "he's not going to try and murder her again."

Yasmin pouted, "when will he ever do that again, I missed it the first time."

"So let me get this straight. We've just been told and the wedding is this weekend?" Lena questioned.

"I know what you're thinking, we haven't just been engaged for ages and not told you. We got engaged last weekend," Kathryn replied.

"Oh, I guess that's ok," Lena said.

Kathryn handed her a PADD, "we really should tell James and get it over with, here's all the times and other things you need to know."

"Mum, I'm not going to a bachelorette party. I went to Jessie's and that was a nightmare," Lena said.

"Well what do you expect, Danny planned it," Kathryn muttered.

"Oh true, who's planning yours?" Lena asked.

Kathryn sighed, "Phoebe."

Lena groaned, "I'll talk to her before deciding whether to go."

"Yeah me too," Yasmin said.

Chakotay sighed, "believe me, you don't have it as bad, I have Tom and Harry planning the bachelor party."

"Why Harry?" Lena asked, while trying to keep a straight face.

Chakotay rolled his eyes, "well if Tom plans it on his own he'll go a bit nuts, Harry's there to help him keep a level head."

"So Tom and Harry are the best men, you're going to walk down the aisle with them?" Sandi questioned.

Kathryn shook her head, "no they'll be handing us the rings at the ceremony. I have someone else in mind for the main best man."

Lena groaned, "I think Yasmin should go with you after all." Yasmin's eyes lit up again.

The Enterprise:
"I don't see what the big deal is. So Janeway and Chakotay leave the ship for a week, is it such a big deal?" Tom said nervously.

Faye looked suspicious, "you know something."

Tom glanced at her, eyes widened, "what makes you think that?"

"Because you're nervous and you don't want to join in with gossip," Faye replied.

"She's right, what's the deal?" Angela asked.

"Nothing," Tom replied, turning slightly red.

Faye grinned, "I have an idea." She left her station and headed over to Triah, who wasn't paying attention.

"What is she doing?" Tom nervously asked.

Faye whispered something in Triah's ear, she backed off quickly. Triah turned her chair around looking rather annoyed. "Tom!"

"Triah?" Tom stuttered.

Triah got off her chair and walked as fast as she could over to him. "How could you do that, it's disgusting! I demand you tell me why you hid this right now!"

Tom turned bright red, "I don't know what you mean."

"What did you tell her?" Angela asked.

Faye shrugged, "I just told her that Tom spilt food down his shirt underneath, didn't clean it and hid it under his main uniform. He'll crack."

Angela smiled, "ah, she's been a little more moody about cleanliness lately, good job."

"But but..." Tom stuttered.

"You do know what I mean, tell me now!" Triah screamed at him.

"Ok ok," Tom stuttered. "Janeway and Chakotay are getting married on Saturday. She told me, Harry and Phoebe first so we can plan bachelor and bachelorette parties."

Triah looked confused, "that's not what I was on about."

Everyone else looked rather shocked. "What? Why would they hide this from us?" Faye asked.

"I don't know, I think they wanted to surprise everyone with the parties," Tom replied. He looked up at Triah, "what were you talking about?"

"Faye told me you spilt curry sauce on your shirt, the grey bit underneath your main uniform," Triah replied.

"Oh crap, how did she know about that," Tom muttered.

Triah got mad again, "that's it, get your ass down to your quarters and clean it!"

Tom cowered, "yes ma'am." He rushed off the bridge.

Angela shook her head, "I think this is just dumb, let's inform everyone on the fleet."

Earth, Durham:
Jessie followed Richard as he headed out of the living room. "So you'll keep in touch?" he asked.

"Yeah definitely," she replied.

Richard opened the glass door that lead to the passage. "It's ok sweetheart, you get some rest, I'll let myself out the rest of the way."

"No I'm ok really, the door isn't that far away now," Jessie said.

"I know," Richard sighed. He opened the front door. "Once again, I'm sorry I didn't contact you."

Jessie rolled her eyes, "would you stop that, it wasn't your fault."

Richard smiled, "ok you take care." He stepped outside.

Jessie closed the door, she headed back into the living room. James watched her sit down on the sofa, "no arguments, nothing. Tell me your secret."

"Well Sarah upset me so he came here to comfort me. That's the secret," Jessie said.

James groaned, "great, what's up with her anyway?"

Jessie looked uncomfortable, "I wish you'd stop asking. Do you really want me to get upset again?"

"No but..." James replied.

"But nothing. Why are you asking anyway, your last meeting with your mum was good right?" Jessie said.

"I know but I've got the feeling that something's going to mess it up again," James said. There was a loud knock on the door. He got off the sofa to head towards the door, "I'll get it."

"Ok but one quick question," Jessie said quickly. James stopped and turned to her. "Vampires don't generally go out in the daylight, so why are you back so late?"

It was James' turn to look uncomfortable, "there was a, um... slight accident."

"Slight accident?" Jessie muttered.

"Basically we found a nest, several people in a vampire resistance got killed," James replied.

"Vampire resistance, that's new," Jessie commented.

"Yeah I'll tell you about it later," James said, he turned to leave the room again.

Another knock on the door was heard by the time he opened the glass door. He opened up the front door. "I hope we got the right house," Kathryn muttered to Chakotay.

"Depends, who are you looking for?" James asked sarcastically.

Kathryn and Chakotay glanced away from each other. "Oh good, it is the right house," Kathryn sighed.

"Come in," James said, stepping out of the way. "Sarah's got the coffee filter machine on, it's like she knew."

Kathryn's eyes lit up, "ooh really?" She rushed into the house.

Chakotay followed her shaking his head, "it's decaf right?"

"No," James replied as he closed the door.

"Good, she's only had time for one cup today," Chakotay sighed. He went further into the house.

"Oh god, something's up," James muttered, following Chakotay further into the house. They both got to the living room.

"Well I don't usually give coffee to strange people," Sarah muttered in Kathryn's direction.

"I'm not strange," Kathryn mumbled.

Jessie tried not to laugh, "I'm keeping quiet."

"It's ok, she is strange but we know her," James said.

"Oh, well I don't," Sarah muttered.

"She's my real mother," James said.

Sarah raised her eyebrow, "really, that explains a few things."

"Like what?" James asked.

"Oh nothing, I just remember buying a full coffee jar one morning and finding it totally empty," Sarah replied.

"Please god, don't finish that story," James muttered as he sat down.

Jessie giggled, "I think we got the basic idea anyway."

Kathryn smiled, "aaw it must have been withdrawal symptoms."

"What, was I fed on coffee granules or something?" James grumbled.

"Don't be silly, there wouldn't have been any for me then," Kathryn said.

Sarah rolled her eyes, "so who's the big guy anyway?"

"Her ex husband and current boyfriend," James replied.

Jessie sighed, "god are you two going to stay together this time? I've never heard of a worse on and off couple."

"Now that you mention it," Kathryn said quietly.

Sarah headed for the kitchen, "I think I heard the timer for the coffee machine go off. How does everyone have theirs?"

"Black," Kathryn replied quickly.

"None," Jessie muttered.

"Same here, I'm fine," Chakotay said.

Sarah glared in James' direction, "you'd better want one."

"Um yeah," James said.

Jessie shook her head, "I told you there was no point."

"What's wrong?" Kathryn asked.

Sarah sighed, "well I'm so glad we have visitors. That filter machine is full, the two of us can't drink it on our own, so there's always some we have to throw out."

"Oh no," James, Jessie and Chakotay all groaned in unison.

Kathryn's eyes widened, "you threw coffee out?"

"Um yeah, we couldn't just leave it," Sarah replied.

Kathryn marched towards the kitchen, "I will help with any leftovers from now on."

"Charming woman," Sarah muttered, following her into the kitchen.

"Yeah and she'd know about that," Jessie commented.

Chakotay sat down in a nearby chair, "so are you getting used to life here again?"

"No," Jessie replied.

"Um ok," Chakotay muttered.

"Sarah's been giving us a hard time," James said.

Chakotay nodded, "right, who's Sarah?"

"The really charming woman you just met," Jessie replied sarcastically. "She's our old foster mother."

"Oh I see. How come she's foster mum to both of you?" Chakotay asked.

"Didn't Janeway tell you at some point? After Peter Taylor got caught Sarah adopted James temporarily," Jessie replied.

"That's right," Chakotay nodded his head. "So what's the problem?"

"She saw us as brother and sister, properly," James replied.

"Ah, that's not good," Chakotay said.

Kathryn walked out of the kitchen holding two cups of coffee, "I have to get a filter machine."

Sarah entered the room with two cups of her own, she handed one to James. "You don't have to drink it that quickly."

"I know, I just wanted to try this out," Kathryn said. She sat down on the armrest of Chakotay's seat.

"Right," Sarah muttered. She headed towards the main door. "Strange woman."

"Don't think that we're not thrilled but why are you here?" Jessie asked.

Kathryn quickly sipped at her left cup. "We're here to tell you something."

"Ok then, spill it," Jessie said.

Kathryn's eyes widened, "no thank you, I plan to drink them both."

James tried to keep a straight face while Jessie just glared angrily at her. "She meant tell us."

Kathryn calmed down, "oh sorry." Chakotay tried to hide a smirk with his hand. "We've got some great news."

"Um great, what is it?" James asked.

Kathryn glanced at Chakotay briefly. "Chakotay and I, we're getting married," she said as James was about to drink some of his coffee. He just started staring blankly while slowly putting the cup down.

"Oh my god, really?" Jessie questioned.

"Yes, it's this Saturday at Durham Cathedral," Kathryn replied.

"Well that's great," Jessie said. She glanced over at James, he was still staring at nothing in particular. "Hey, are you ok?"

James slowly glanced at her, "yeah."

Kathryn smiled nervously, "I'm sorry it's so last minute, but we wanted to get married right away."

"Um ok but when, how, why, where..." James stuttered.

Jessie put a comforting hand on his shoulder, "it's ok calm down, it's good news."

Kathryn smiled, "when was last Sunday not long after you left. How, all I'll say it was very romantic. Why, because we love each other. Where, I told you, Durham cathedral."

Chakotay shook his head, "we're not expecting you to get used to this straight away. We're really hoping you both will come, and bring your kids too."

"Actually there is something we need to know very soon, it's important," Kathryn said.

"Ok, what?" James said.

"Chakotay's mother and sister will walk him down the aisle, I'll have my mother obviously but I need someone else, we need a best man. We've already got Tom and Harry planning the bachelorette and bachelor parties, but I was really hoping that you'd be the one to go down the aisle with me," Kathryn said.

"You mean, give you away?" James muttered.

"Well that's the idea yes. My father isn't, well around to do it," Kathryn replied.

"But you already gave me away at my wedding, it doesn't work," James said.

"I know but we weren't really that close back then, we're a little friendlier now and it would be kind of like you were giving me away," Kathryn said.

"I dunno, your mother should just do it," James said.

"We do need a best man," Chakotay said.

"Yeah but Ian and Danny will tell you I'm not the best," James said.

Jessie sat up, "oh why don't we make somebody carry a coffee jar, that can give her away."

Kathryn frowned, "James, what did I give you away too?"

Jessie looked far from happy, "god it was a joke." She pulled herself up and stormed out of the room.

"I'll think about it but that's it. One more insult though and I won't," James said.

Kathryn sighed, "I know I didn't mean to snap but, coffee is never giving me away, ever."

Chakotay and James stared blankly at her, then they both looked at each other. "You feel insulted?" James asked.

"Oh yeah," Chakotay replied.

Meanwhile, Voyager:
Andrea pulled herself off her chair, "helm how long until we reach our destination?"

"About twenty minutes," Bryan replied.

"Where are we going anyway?" Emma asked.

Andrea rolled her eyes, "the Lyrithien homeworld."

"Does anyone remember why?" Emma asked.

"Uh, no," Andrea muttered.

"Well it would be amazing if someone did cos Janeway just told us to visit them," Jodie said.

"This is very suspicious," Andrea said as she stood up. "Where has she been so far?"

"New Manchester, now she's nearby Durham," Jodie replied.

"So she's just visiting her kids," Bryan muttered, looking disappointed.

Andrea frowned, "if that was so, she wouldn't make us leave Earth."

Bryan shrugged, "well we are spending too much time there."

"No something just doesn't add up. There's something going on, I can feel it," Andrea said. She folded her arms, "you know like it's just on my leg or something." She looked down to find Johnathan tugging on her trouser leg.

"This should be good," Emma commented.

"Um, what do you want?" Andrea asked.

"Chakotay and Janeway are getting married this weekend," Johnathan replied.

Everyone's eyes widened in shock. "Oh god." Andrea muttered.

"They weren't going to tell you until everything was arrange... er, the plans were made final," Johnathan said.

"That's typical. We're going back," Andrea said.

Bryan turned around to stare angrily at Johnathan, "how come you know this?"

"Dad told me," Johnathan replied.

Bryan narrowed his eyes, "dad never tells me anything."

"Cos you would never know what to do with the info, see ya," Johnathan giggled, he ran off.

"I hate that kid," Bryan grumbled.

"Whatever, set a course for Earth. I'm not missing a party, unless a planet was in danger or something," Andrea said.

"Really?" everyone said.

Andrea shrugged, "depends which planet."

Bryan turned back around, "ok, setting a course."

The following night, Newcastle Quayside:
Chakotay picked up speed to catch up with Tom and Harry, both were leading a group of guys down a wide street. "Ok guys, you remembered the deal right?"

"Yeah yeah, no strippers god," Tom groaned.

"Oh and by the way, we didn't plan on telling everyone until earlier tonight," Chakotay muttered.

"Triah is really scary right now, sorry," Tom said.

"Don't be, everyone needed more time to get ready. Some people need babysitters, some people need to tell superiors they may be late the next day, you know because of hangovers," Harry commented.

"Yeah," Tom nodded his head.

Chakotay sighed, "fine. Where are we going exactly?"

"Some nice club I found, I booked it just for us tonight. We've also got a live band," Tom replied.

Harry shushed him, "Tom, you'll give it away."

Tom blushed, "oh yeah right." He and Harry picked up speed again.

"Why don't I like the sound of that?" Chakotay grumbled.

Meanwhile, in a place called Costa Coffee:
Lena and Jessie stood together in the corner, holding small colourful slushy drinks. "You know I should have planned this," Jessie said.

Lena glanced at her, "yeah, anyone else but Aunt Phoebe should have. It's going to be a long night."

Kathryn ran over to Phoebe, she hugged her tightly. "This is so nice. How did you know?"

"Well it wasn't that hard. We like coffee, so the obvious choice was a coffee shop," Phoebe replied.

"I love this city," Kathryn giggled, she ran towards the counter.

Gretchen nearby just sighed, "this may be a stupid question but does this place sell tea?"

"Supposedly," Phoebe groaned, she walked off.

Yasmin rushed over to Lena and Jessie holding a large brown slushy, "hey guys, you should try this, it's nice."

"Um ok," Lena muttered. She tried to take it away from her but she kept a tight grip of it.

"Sorry, it's harder than I thought," Yasmin said, eyes getting slightly wide. She walked away sucking on the straw.

"I'm thinking that's a coffee frappuchino," Lena said.

"Hmm yeah," Jessie nodded her head. "Well it could be worse, there could have been strippers."

Phoebe climbed onto the counter, and clapped her hands. "Ok girls listen up, I've got a great game planned out. I've got five stripped..."

Some of the girls looked rather interested, "ooh?"

"Let me finish, stripped coffee jars," Phoebe snapped.

The same girls groaned, "oh god."

"What do you expect, it's Janeway's bachelorette party," one grumbled.

"The aim of the game is to test each one and guess it's brand. We mix them up again for the next person. Whoever guesses the most correctly wins the whole lot," Phoebe said.

"Ohno, the party is getting slightly wild already," Naomi muttered sarcastically.

"Anyone want to play?" Phoebe asked. She and Kathryn put their hands up. "Oh come on, we need at least one more person."

Yasmin put down her slushy, "ooh ooh, I wanna play!" She quickly picked her slushy back up.

"Um Phoebe," Lena said.

"You want to play too?" Phoebe asked.

"No, I was thinking of picking up a CD player or something. We need music," Lena replied.

Phoebe rolled her eyes, "fine, music wasn't until later but ok."

"Oh so there is a CD player around then?" Lena questioned.

Phoebe climbed off the counter, disappeared behind it. Not long later she appeared again holding a CD player, "here."

Lena walked over to pick it up, "finally, I'll have to get some decent CDs though." She walked off with it.

"Oh there's a CD store nearby," Phoebe said.

"Great," Lena grinned. She glanced at Jessie, "wanna give me a hand?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Jessie sighed in relief. She and Lena headed out of the shop.

One girl ran up to them, "oh can you get at least one album by a boyband please?"

Lena was about to reply but Jessie just slapped the girl. She smiled innocently, "this is a bachelorette party, not a funeral honey." She stepped out, Lena followed her.        

Meanwhile:
All the guys were hanging around Danny and Ian's club, most of the unknown ones were on the dancefloor cheering on the live band, or just dancing stupidly. The live band were a bunch of girls dressed slutty.

Chakotay walked over to Tom, he was dancing slightly nearby a large speaker. "I am going to kill you. I said nothing sleazy and that includes slutty live bands."

"What, sorry Chakotay I can't hear you!" Tom yelled, he walked away.

Chakotay rolled his eyes, he headed towards the bar. Daniel, James and Neelix were sitting on the stools, while Ian and Noah were behind the bar.

"Ok hit me," Daniel muttered. Ian filled the shot glass with a strange red drink. Daniel quickly downed it, "hit me."

"I think I've lost count here," Ian said.

"Don't worry, it takes a lot to get me drunk. Hit me," Daniel said. Ian sighed as he refilled the glass. "Hit me." James nearby just rolled his eyes, Chakotay stood beside him.

"Noah, whiskey please," he ordered.

"Yes sir," Noah grinned. He headed over to the mini fridge.

"Hit me," Daniel said. James reached over and smacked him across the head, like expected he fell off the stool.

Chakotay and Ian stared at James looking amused. "Uh, no fighting in my club," Ian said, trying to keep a straight face.

"What? He was asking for it," James said, trying to look innocent.

Ian sighed, "I think I'll leave the bottle."

Noah handed Chakotay a whiskey bottle. "Thanks," he said.

"Well Chuckles, this is a good party," James said.

Chakotay sighed, "I guess so."

"You just guess so. This is nothing, don't you remember the bachelor party Ian planned for me?" James said.

Chakotay glanced at the ceiling in mid thought, a few seconds later he shuddered. "Oh yeah, I blocked that from my memory. I need more booze to block it again."

Ian groaned, "god you two are wusses."

"You're lucky you're the bar guy and kinda my friend," James muttered.

Ian grinned, "oh come on, you know what I mean."

"I know but it's not a party if I don't threaten someone," James said.

Chakotay laughed, "and hit someone."

Daniel finally climbed back onto his stool, "I think I'll start on the bigger drinks."

James glanced over at him, "I don't do that every party. I only do it when people have shots."

Daniel frowned, "oh yeah, 'hit me', hilarious."

"Ok sorry, I would never forgive myself if I'd let that one slip away," James said.

Ian sighed, "why are you three still hanging around here anyway? It's only a live band, they're not that bad."

"They're crap," Daniel commented.

Chakotay rolled his eyes, "I'm only here because I'm sure Tom's got another surprise for me, probably involving the live band."

Right on cue Tom got onto the stage once a song finished. The lead singer handed him the microphone. "Hello boys, welcome to Chakotay's bachelor party. The man himself didn't want to have strippers so we're going to have to have fun in another way."

A lot of the guys moaned in disappointment. "Oh no no, it's going to be good. We've got drinking games, more brilliant songs by the girls here and when they're done they'll be joining us on the dancefloor."

"Why does that sound suspicious to me?" James questioned, glancing in Chakotay's direction.

"Hmm, yeah," Chakotay narrowed his eyes.

"Right I'll leave you alone for another hour or so. Now it's time for a very special song, it's in honour of our best buddy Chakotay," Tom grinned. "It's a rock version, and slightly edited version of a 'brilliant' song. Enjoy!" Tom handed the microphone back to the lead singer, he jumped down from the stage.

"Oooh, oooh, ooooh," the backing singer hummed. The guitarist and drummer suddenly started playing a familiar tune.

"Ooh, akoonah matata, it's a wonderful device!" the lead singer bellowed.

"Ohno," Chakotay groaned.

James and Ian both glanced at Chakotay, trying not to laugh. Daniel just looked confused. "What the bloody hell are they singing?" he grumbled.

Chakotay rolled his eyes, "oh very funny. Hakuna matata, akoonah, very good."

The music calmed down. "When he was a young ma-an, he dissed his tribe and dreamed of the stars. Bows and arrows did not appeal, Ferengi and Cardies did instead."

"Oooh, oooh," the backing singers hummed.

"He was bold and brave, but his dream faded, the fleet life failed, and he became a rebel. Oh woah." The music picked up again. "Akoonah matata, it's a wonderful device. Akoonah matata, ain't no song and dance. It means you can look in, far deep into your mind. Yeah, let's have a problem free, vision quest. Akoonah matata."

"So is Tom still invited to your wedding?" James asked.

"Oh he is, he'll just not be alive to attend it," Chakotay grumbled.

Costa Coffee:
"Yeah I win!" Kathryn squealed.

Phoebe slammed her hand on the counter, "damn so close, I demand a recount!"

Gretchen, who was obviously the judge, "sorry, Kathryn won fair and square."

Kathryn giggled, she gathered the jars into her arms. "See you in an hour." She ran off.

Lena and Jessie returned with a couple dozen CDs in their arms, obviously Lena had the most. After dumping them on the ground nearby the CD player, Lena put one of them inside the player. Music started blasting from it.

"I think I deserve another mixed fruit frappuchino for finding that CD," Jessie muttered.

"Can you get me one too?" a familiar voice asked from behind her.

"Do I look like the waitress?" Jessie snapped as she turned around. She softened up after seeing who said it.

"Sorry I didn't mean to sound demanding," Kes said.

Lena walked over, "Kes, what are you doing here?"

"I heard there was a wedding and stuff, I thought I'd attend," Kes replied.

Kathryn stumbled over, "Kessy! Come here and give me a hug!"

"Oh I should have come an hour earlier," Kes muttered through gritted teeth. She headed over to Kathryn, she started hugging her tightly.

"Still want that fruit frappuchino?" Jessie questioned.

Kes finally was freed, "yes please."

The next day, Durham:
Jessie walked slowly into the living room looking half asleep.

James looked up at her from the sofa, "morning."

Jessie jumped a mile, now she was awake, "oh my god, don't ever do that."

"Sorry," James said.

Jessie looked at him, "wait, why are you still here? I did read that clock right, right?"

"Yeah. The new boss is quite nice, he said I could have a day off as long as I work half a weekend sometime," James replied.

"Oh good, hungover or something?" Jessie asked as she collapsed onto the sofa next to him.

"A little bit, but mum and the bridesmaids have to come here tonight. I need to find somewhere for them to sleep," James replied.

"I forgot, the rehearsal dinner is tonight isn't it?" Jessie said.

"Well tomorrow is the wedding," James said.

Jessie glanced at him slowly, "what?"

"Er you were here when we were told," James muttered.

"I thought it was Thursday, that's all," Jessie sighed.

"A little hungover yourself?" James questioned.

Jessie pulled a face, "yeah right. Even if I was allowed to drink alcohol I wouldn't have been able to have some."

"Why not?" James asked.

"Phoebe planned the bachelorette party, and it was for your mum so you can figure it out," Jessie muttered as she climbed back off the sofa.

"Oh, the only drinks were coffee?" James said.

"No, well yeah mostly, we had the party in a coffee shop in Newcastle," Jessie grumbled. She walked into the kitchen.

James laughed as he got up, "I hope somebody videotaped it." He followed her into the kitchen.

"Why, you've seen your mother high on coffee before," Jessie grumbled.

"More times than I've seen her serious, yeah I know," James said. "It's just I wish I could have been there."

"Oh I see, Chakotay's bachelor party was dull, was it?" Jessie questioned. She started looking through one of the cupboards.

"Ohno it was quite funny actually," James replied.

Jessie picked out a jar from the cupboard, "well, humour me."

"Tom and Harry hired this slutty girl band to sing a few songs. One Tom must have wrote, well parodied, called Akoonah Matata. For half an hour most of us watched Chakotay chase him around, trying to kill him," James said.

"Now that's a video camera moment," Jessie smiled, she tried to open the jar.

"Not if you're comparing it to what happened later," James said.

"Oh did he catch him?" Jessie asked.

"No, Chakotay and Tom came to a compromise. Tom had to do most of the karoake for one thing," James replied. He took the jar off her and opened it easily.

Jessie snatched it back, "thanks."

"They're not pickled onions are they?" James asked, looking disgusted.

"Yes, they're nice," Jessie innocently said.

"Sure whatever," James muttered. "Oh did I mention Neelix got thrown out of the club cos he started to strip?"

Jessie pulled a face, she put down the jar. "You're just trying to put me off the onions."

"No, not at all, he did do it," James said.

"I'm guessing that's not the video camera moment you were going to mention," Jessie grumbled.

"No definitely not," James muttered. "There were a few really, after a drinking contest Ian decided to make it karoake night."

"Oh you went to Ian's club," Jessie said.

"Yeah, you won't believe how many good songs his karoake machine has," James said. "Ok Craig opened up the 'show' with Left Outside Alone, dunno why.."

Flashback (oh come on, you know it's more fun this way):
"Oh woah, ooooh!" Craig squealed. "Oh maybe you should know, just how it feels to be left outside alone! When it's cold outside... there's no kind of atmosphere. I'm alone, more or less."

"Craig, wrong song!" Harry yelled at him.

"F*** you!" Craig snapped. "Let me fly far away from here. Fun fun fun, oh this is the wrong song." He then collapsed.

Ian walked onto the stage, "uh, let's hear it for Craig everyone." He knelt down and pushed him onto the ground. "Next we have Neelix!"

Neelix drunkenly climbed onto the stage, Ian handed him the microphone while slipping a earplug in his ear. "Hey everybody, I'm going to sing Sleazy."

"Oh god," nearly everyone groaned.

Ian nervously selected the song, he put his other earplug in. "I'm so glad this is a PG episode," he muttered.

"Ooh touch and a kiss, this is my kind of pleasure, we love the girls cos the girls have the treasure," Neelix slurrily said into the microphone.

"This is a girl's song and it's a bit... um rude, we're doomed," Chakotay muttered.

James glanced at him looking confused, he took out a earplug, "what?"

"Never mind," Chakotay rolled his eyes.

"It's kinda sleazy!" Neelix yelled out. He started to take off his jacket, "dance with me..."

Present day:
"James, unless you want me to go gay I suggest you stop telling that part," Jessie grumbled.

"Sorry," James muttered.

Flashback:
Ian walked back onto the stage, "sorry about that, thank god this is a PG episode." Everyone in the room agreed by nodding their heads or shrugging. "Next up we have Harry."

Harry walked onto the stage. "Thanks Ian. I'm going to sing a song that means a lot to me right now, ah screw that, I'm singing Jump." As soon as the music began he started jumping up and down.

"Your eyes, tell me how you want me. I can feel it in your heartbeat. I know you like what you see," Harry tried to sing. He continued to jump up and down like an idiot all the way through the verse.

"If you want more, more more! Then jump!" He suddenly jumped into the crowd, everyone got out of the way in time so he just fell onto the ground.

Ian walked back onto the stage, "uh, Harry everyone." Everyone clapped.

Present Day:
"Ok I think I get the picture," Jessie giggled.

"Well the best ones went first, well excluding Kevin," James said.

"Oh tell me what happened," Jessie said.

"No you got the picture," James said, he walked out of the room.

Jessie pouted, "that's just mean."

Later that night, Durham City:
All of the main cast, most of the guest stars and some unknown people had all gathered in a large hall inside Lumley Castle.

Harry jumped up with a glass, "ok ok attention!" He used a spoon to tap the glass hard, "I'd like to make a toast!"

Tom pulled him back down, "Harry, the party's just started. You're not drunk already are you?"

"Hey, three parties in a row. I can get drunk at two and I'd still remember one!" Harry yelled at him.

Tom looked nervous, "um yeah."

"God I'm bored, isn't there supposed to be a DJ at this thing!" Harry yelled.

Tom looked rather embarrassed, "I think that's after the wedding."

"Oh bugger," Harry grumbled. He sat down in his chair and fell asleep with his head on the table.

Tom looked around, "has someone been spiking his drinks or something?"

Johnathan climbed out from under the table, "what was that dad?"

"What are you doing under there?" Tom asked.

Johnathan tried to look innocent, "not swapping everyone's water with pure vodka that's for sure." He ran off towards his mother.

"Oh god," Tom muttered. He stood up, "trust Harry to be the only one with water... wait uhoh." He glanced over towards Annika, she obviously had water too.

"Yes I know, I thought 'what the hell, I haven't wore it in a while'," Annika giggled.

Admiral Patterson and Paris both looked uncomfortable. "So you think it's appropriate to wear a lime green catsuit at a rehearsal dinner?" Patterson asked.

"Well yes... why not!" Annika snapped. She finished off her drink. "Ooh that's the nicest water I've ever had in my life, I'm going to get more." She walked off just as Tom reached her.

"Dad, is she drunk?" he asked carefully.

"I don't know, I'm not sure how she acts when sober," Paris replied.

"I hope she is drunk, good god," Patterson muttered, he walked away.

Tom groaned, "ugh, this is not going to be good."

Not far away Jessie walked over to Kathryn and Chakotay. "Hey guys, can I ask you something?"

"Depends what it is, well obviously we won't know until you ask," Chakotay replied.

Jessie stared blankly, "ok whatever. I know a lot of the girls are bridesmaids, Duncan & Sasha go down the aisle at least, and you asked James to be best man."

"That reminds me, can you tell him that the wedding's tomorrow and I need his answer tonight," Kathryn said.

"Fine!" Jessie snapped. Chakotay and Kathryn glanced at each other nervously. She calmed down quickly, "ok I was wondering, do you have any jobs I can do?"

"Oh, you want to be part of the wedding?" Kathryn questioned.

"Well I am family aren't I? Why am I the only one who's not included?" Jessie replied.

"I'm sorry Jessie, it's not personal, it's just I didn't think you'd want to be included," Kathryn said.

"Oh, well I do so can I?" Jessie asked.

Kathryn glanced at Chakotay, "I'll tell you what, I'll have a think about it and get back to you."

"Thanks," Jessie said, she walked away.

A guy dressed up in an old fashioned suit walked up to the couple, "ma'am the banquet is ready."

"Oh good, do you have any coffee?" Kathryn asked.

"You get that at the bar," the guy replied.

"Oh why didn't you say so," Kathryn giggled. She kissed Chakotay on the cheek before rushing out of the hall.

"I'll let the guests know," Chakotay said.

Two hours later:
Music was now playing around the hall, a few people were dancing. Craig had taken DJ duty, but he wasn't really alone.

"So why did you dedicate the Red Dwarf theme tune to Lena last night?" Tom asked.

Craig glanced at him looking annoyed, "shut up or I'll tell James or maybe even Jessie that Johnathan touched their daughter's butt."

Tom's eyes widened, "okeydokey." He walked away but seconds later he came back. "Did he, cos if he did I'm still dead."

"No god, you're missing the point," Craig grumbled.

"Oh right," Tom said, he walked away again.

Meanwhile Kathryn was talking to the bar man in one of the neighbouring rooms. "That coffee is nice, you must lose a fortune considering it's an alien kind."

"I don't know ma'am, I don't buy it, I just serve it," the bar man said.

"Oh ok," Kathryn sighed.

James came over to the bar, "can I have two more glasses of coke?"

"Sure. Diet, cherry, vanilla, lemon, caffeine free or normal?" the bar guy asked.

Annika ran into the room giggling, "you can't catch me!"

Duncan ran in after her, "god you run fast for someone in heels." He looked around for something, he picked up a glass bottle and continued running after her. "Give me back my sweets cow!"

"Come and get them!" Annika giggled, she evaded him and ran out of the room.

"Um, maybe one of them could be just diet and one cherry," James muttered.

The bar man looked amused, "good idea." He quickly filled two glasses, he put a straw in each one. "Ok, blue is cherry and white is diet."

"Great thanks," James said, he picked them up and headed out of the room.

Kathryn started to follow him, "did Jessie tell..."

"Yeah, I'll get back to you. I know Annika's annoying and dies all the time but I don't want Duncan to kill her," James said.

"Hey, I'll set my dad onto you if you don't give them back! What the hell's wrong with you!" Duncan's voice screamed from the hall.

"And I can't be bothered to do it tonight," James muttered, he headed for the hall.

"Right, I'll wait here," Kathryn said.

Chakotay walked over to her with wide eyes, "hmm Duncan chasing Annika, who's wearing a lime green catsuit by the way, with a glass bottle isn't something you see everyday."

"No, I think he's actually mad and she just thinks he's playing with her," Kathryn said.

"Yeh uh, Johnathan swapped water with pure vodka. Only her and Harry, I think, had water," Chakotay said.

"That explains it," Kathryn said. She and Chakotay headed towards the hall.

Inside the hall the chase was still on. "Good god," James groaned. He handed the glasses to Jessie, "can you guard them?"

"I could handle it you know, I just don't like Annika," Jessie innocently said.

"I said can you guard them, you know look after the drinks," James muttered.

"Oh yeah sure," Jessie replied.

Annika ran passed Kes, she stopped for one second, "hey you look familiar." Duncan lunged for her but she just giggled. "Missed me hehe," she ran off again.

Duncan groaned, "that cow nicked my cherry cola bottle sweets."

Kes sighed, "yes well she tried to kill me so I'll take care of it." She rushed over to Annika.

James finally got to Duncan, "I hope you two are playing a game."

"No, she nicked my sweets," Duncan pouted. He raised the bottle he had, "do you want this?"

"Are you thick, you stole his sweets that's why he's chasing you," Kes snapped at Annika nearby.

"Nah, we're playing tag. Do you want to play?" Annika giggled.

"Ugh fine," Kes groaned. She smacked her hard in the face. "Tag I win, now give me the sweets."

Annika pouted, "you're mean." She handed over the sweets and ran off crying.

"I've always wanted to do that," Kes smiled. She walked over to Duncan and James, she handed the sweets to Duncan. "Here you go."

"Hey thanks miss," Duncan giggled, he ran off.

"Well that's more sugar he's going to have," James muttered.

"Oops, sorry," Kes said.

"Nah, it's a party why not," James said.

Kathryn came over to him, "ok can you talk to me now?"

"Oh crap, in a sec. I don't really want Duncan having extra sugar with those sweets," James replied. He rushed over to Jessie, Duncan and Sasha. "The white straw is Duncan's."

Jessie frowned, "what's the difference?"

"There's a difference, just take my word for it," James replied.

"Ok," Jessie muttered, she handed the right drinks to the two kids.

"Right now I've got something to sort out," James sighed. He went back over to Kathryn. "Ok I'll do it but I still think it's weird."

Kathryn smiled, "that's great." She hugged him.

"Um, you did hear what I fully said right?" James questioned.

"Yes it's fine," Kathryn replied as she pulled away. "Now I have a job for Jessie, can you ask her for me, Chakotay wants to dance with me to the next song."

"Um ok, what is it?" James questioned.

A little while later Craig switched on the mini microphone, "ok folks. The next request is from the groom, the song is I Have Always Loved You." Chakotay and Kathryn rushed onto the dance floor, a few couples stayed around but the single ones moved off.

"God this song's crap," Duncan muttered.

"Yep you're right there," Jessie said.

Sasha glanced at Duncan, "I just remembered, Johnathan suggested playing hide and seek, do you want to?"

"Ok why not," Duncan replied.

Jessie sighed, "fine don't ask me first."

"Can we play hide and seek mummy?" Sasha asked sweetly.

"Yes, just tell your friends that you only play in the bar room, here and the room in between," Jessie replied.

"Yey let's go," Sasha giggled. She and Duncan headed off.

James came over, "what are they up to?"

"Hide and seek," Jessie replied.

"Ok. Mum's got a job for you," James said.

"Does it involve dressing up in a dress?" Jessie asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Um, yes," James replied quietly.

Jessie glared at him, "then why come to me, get me a better job."

"I'm sorry but it's a good job and you don't even know what it is yet," James muttered. Jessie's glare continued. "I'll go talk to her again, after her dance."

"Good," Jessie smiled sweetly, she walked away.

"I don't get why I have to but never mind," James said to himself, he headed off in another direction.

Half an hour later:
The whole dancefloor quickly filled up when the song The Show started.

"Have you noticed that we're having a party at a rehearsal dinner?" Danny asked.

Tani raised her eyebrow, "no really?"

"Ok I said that wrong. This is supposed to be a rehearsal of the wedding dinner," Danny said.

"Yeah and there's always a party afterwards. We'll be coming back here for the party so we're practising," Tani said.

"Oh," Danny said. "Damn I missed out on something." She turned back to Ian and danced with him.

Lena glanced over, "missed what?"

"This, I mean Ian and I didn't have a rehearsal dinner. We figured those were just boring," Danny replied.

"Most are I think," Lena said.

"Oh well then, mine wouldn't have been," Danny said with a cheeky grin on her face. She turned back to Ian.

Lena shrugged, she turned back to Daniel. Of course they were dancing no where near as close as Danny and Ian were. The music was slowly turned up so it was full blast.

"Um red alert," Daniel muttered.

"What!" Lena yelled.

"Damn this song's gotten loud, I said red alert!" Daniel yelled back. He looked over at Craig, he just smiled evilly.

Lena frowned, she glanced around. Kathryn was staring right at her, she started to head over. "Oh crap."

"Right, we don't mention the coffee right or was that a joke?" Daniel asked.

"It wasn't a joke!" Lena replied loud enough for him to hear.

"Lena, can I ask you what you're doing with him?" Kathryn asked angrily.

"Um what mum, I can't hear you!" Lena yelled at her.

Kathryn took a hold of her arm, "come with me!"

Daniel quickly got in the way, "Janeway don't be harsh on her, it..."

"You keep the hell away from my daughter!" Kathryn snapped at him.

"Why should he!" Lena yelled at her.

"Because he, because he!" Kathryn tried to yell. She turned to Craig, "Craig turn that down a little!" He nodded, the music turned back to the original level. "Because he is what, fourteen years older than you for one thing. He murdered your brother's step mother."

"Oh mum. Fourteen years is nothing, I'm not a teenager anymore am I? Anyway the only person who should be the most bothered about this is James, and he was ok with it," Lena said.

"What! What's wrong with everyone!" Kathryn snapped.

"Nothing, he's just treating me like an adult like you should," Lena snapped back.

"He's a murderer Lena," Kathryn grumbled.

"Um can I interrupt?" Daniel asked.

"No you can't," Kathryn snapped at him.

"So? It wasn't really him was it, besides you don't judge James the same way. Or Jessie or your future husband for that matter," Lena grumbled. "Actually a lot of people here are murderers in your view right?"

"There's a difference between killing people in a war and killing people in cold blood, and there's a difference between what he did and what evil Slayers or witches do," Kathryn said.

"Oh so if there's a war going on it's ok is it?" Lena questioned.

"No it's not ok, I'm just comparing. He murdered an innocent woman, yes she was annoying but it's still wrong. Him losing his memories doesn't change what he did," Kathryn replied.

"Well I'm not going to hurt her, I can promise you that," Daniel said.

"Like he could anyway," Lena said.

"I don't care, I don't want you dating a murderer Lena," Kathryn grumbled.

"Fine but if we're doing this why don't you go and make James get a divorce while you're at it!" Lena yelled, she stormed off.

Danny looked around, "who's getting a divorce and what now?"

Ian smiled, "I think we've spent too much time in that club." She nodded in agreement.

James walked over to Jessie. She was just staring at where the argument happened before while drinking a fruity drink. "What was that about?"

"Janeway found out about Lena dating Daniel, she blew. She doesn't want him dating her cos he's a murderer," Jessie replied. She fiddled with her straw, "this is nice."

"I don't think it's nice, we've both been screamed at by her several times ourselves, remember?" James said.

Jessie glanced at him, "been standing near the speakers or something?"

"No why?" James questioned.

Jessie smiled, "I just said my drink was nice."

"Oh right," James muttered.

Jessie handed him what was left of the drink, "it's in the non alcoholic cocktails, it was named after a Disney character."

"Ok," James said before trying it. "Yeah it's good," he handed it back.

Jessie glanced at him, "well, any new jobs?"

"Oh yeah I forgot about that," James said. "I'm going to have to break it to you gently, I don't want any broken bones after all..."

"Well I'm going to make it easy for you. Does it involve a dress?" Jessie asked.

"Yes," James replied.

"That's breaking it to me gently! The last time you told me had an extra word!" Jessie snapped. James and everyone near her all cringed or cowered, take your pick. "You could have just shoved a bridesmaid dress in my face and forced me into it."

Danny chose that moment to walk passed, "hmm I'd say it was kinky but it's not really."

"Oh god Danny," Jessie groaned.

"Ok I'm sorry Jess, you just threw me off," James said.

Jessie sighed, "sorry."

"I'll talk to her again," James said.

"No don't bother. She's got bridesmaids, best man, other people who walk her and Chakotay down the aisle, ring bearer people, priest, heck she probably even organised someone to say 'I object' at the wedding. I'm sure Triah's been hired to be a crasher guard," Jessie muttered.

She and James glanced over in Triah's direction, she was glaring at several people while looking around the room. Her eyes widened suddenly, "hey be careful, you might spill that!" She ran over to Harry who had a glass which was empty. "God some people!"

"Hey, are you an angel?" Harry giggled.

Triah looked disgusted, "well now I know for sure that you're not my baby's dad. I'd never fall for that, not even drunk."

Harry grinned, "aaw." He started hugging her.

"What time is it?" Jessie asked.

James raised his arm to look at his watch, which had gotten upside down. "four, that's not right." He took it off, "oh not again, it keeps doing that!"

"That's what you get for getting one of those really old fashioned kind," Jessie said.

"Oh it's half eleven, we should get the kids home," James said.

Jessie groaned, "they're playing hide and seek still. This should be fun."

Neelix jumped on top of a nearby table, "it seems like lately! Something's coming over me baby!" He started to take off his jacket.

"Oh crap, we haven't got time!" Jessie panicked.

The next morning, James/Jessie's foster home:
One of the bedrooms was still dark. On the floor were a few sleeping bags, and of course the normal kind of bags.

James turned over in his sleeping bag, half asleep. The alarm clock on the floor loudly went off, he leaned over to switch it off but it broke. "Not again," he groaned. He opened his eyes, then quickly sat up in shock. "Lena, what are you doing here!?"

Lena woke up suddenly and screamed lightly, "god James, don't do that!"

"What are you doing? I thought you wanted the bed!" James yelled.

Jessie groaned on the other side of him, "keep it down will you, us jobless people need sleep."

Lena tried to look innocent, "well Jessie kept kicking me, it was annoying."

"Well Kes and Yasmin are here, you could have slept next to them," James grumbled.

Lena rolled her eyes, "god what's the big deal, I'm only your sister."

"I'm sorry but I wasn't expecting you to be next to me," James said as he climbed to his feet.

"Ok ok," Lena muttered. She climbed out of her own bag.

"How many times do I have to warn you before I get grouchy?" Jessie snapped, still with her eyes closed.

"Er Jess, we have to help the kids get ready too," James muttered.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Jessie muttered to herself.

"Ok but I'm not pretending I didn't hear that," James commented.

Jessie opened her eyes, "all right I'm getting up."

Half an hour later:
"But why not?" Kathryn cried.

James looked nervous, "you don't want to be hyper for your own wedding."

"Yeh for her it's like being drunk at her own," Phoebe commented.

"Just one, please," Kathryn pouted.

Phoebe groaned, "well ok, just one." She headed into the kitchen.

"Can you get me one too?" James asked.

"Fine," Phoebe groaned.

Gretchen climbed off the sofa, "we've only got an hour until we have to get to the cathedral. We all should get changed."

"But I haven't had my coffee yet," Kathryn moaned.

"Fine we'll get changed first, you and Phoebe join us upstairs when you're finished," Gretchen said. She left the room.

Duncan ran into the room holding a little black jacket, "is this a joke?"

"Um depends what you're talking about," James replied.

Duncan glanced angrily at the jacket, "this! I wouldn't be seen dead in this."

Kathryn smiled, "aaw, it's cute, what's wrong with it?"

James knelt down to have a closer look at the jacket. "I think you just answered your question."

"I have worn stupid things for weddings but this is the stupidest so far," Duncan grumbled.

"Well it could be worse," James said, trying to keep a straight face.

"How?" Duncan pouted.

"What the hell!" Jessie screamed from outside. She rushed into the room holding a little pink dress, "who gave this to my daughter!?"

Kathryn looked confused, "I did, it's cute isn't it?"

"Yes and Sasha's worn dresses before," James said carefully.

"But it's pink and it... ugh, I'm getting a white one," Jessie grumbled. She walked back out of the room.

Duncan giggled, "yeah that's worse."

"I'm going to regret this but what do I have to wear?" James asked.

Phoebe handed Kathryn a coffee, "oh you don't want to know."

"He may like it, shut up," Kathryn grumbled. She sipped her coffee, "hmm, that's better."

"Well you did replicate it last minute as you didn't know his size," Phoebe commented. She handed him a coffee too.

"What is it?" James asked.

Kathryn sighed, "I'll go and get it. I have to get ready in a second anyway." She rushed out of the room.

"It's horrible believe me, I'd go and replicate something else now," Phoebe whispered as she walked passed James. She followed her sister out of the room.

"Dad while you're at it, get me something else," Duncan said.

James stood back up, "fine." There was a loud knock on the front door, he left the room to get it.

Sasha walked into the room, "what's wrong with mum?"

Duncan tried not to laugh, "grandma got you a pink dress."

"Eew," Sasha moaned.

James came back into the room, Mark followed him in. "Why don't you just wait until the damn after party?" James muttered.

"Well I need to talk to her before it, it's urgent," Mark replied.

"Wait here, I'll go and get her," James said. He left the room again.

Sasha glanced at Duncan, "who's the old man?"

"I dunno," Duncan replied.

Mark frowned as he looked down at the kids. "Ok I'm not an old man. Who are you?"

"You first, it's our house mister," Duncan snapped.

Mark looked shocked, "um I'm Mark and you have a bad attitude towards adults."

"Who the hell is Mark?" Sasha asked.

"Watch your language," Mark grumbled.

"Ok," Sasha said. She walked over to the TV and switched it on. "Oh it's on after the break, thanks for reminding me."

"That's actually a TV show, oh well," Duncan muttered.

Kathryn and James came back into the room. "Mark this better be good, I'm getting ready for my wedding," Kathryn said.

James rushed over to Sasha, "honey, how many times do I have to tell you. That shows not suitable for kids." He picked her up.

"Oh, but it's funny," she moaned. She pointed at Mark, "he told me to watch it."

Mark rolled his eyes, "she said hell so I told her to watch her language."

"Ok stumpy, she's my kid and I don't mind her saying hell," James muttered.

Kathryn sighed, "neither did I with him until he started saying hell every other sentence."

"Did I hell," James commented. "Oh right."

Mark glanced at Kathryn, "so those two are the grandchildren, I wish I knew sooner."

"Oh god, we haven't got another granddad do we?" Duncan groaned.

"No, you can only have two," James replied.

"Thank god, he's just as annoying as the dead one," Duncan muttered as he headed out of the room.

"I wouldn't go that far," Kathryn muttered.

James nodded his head, "yeah."

Sasha pouted, "my granddad's dead?"

"Um, you've got two Sash, the one you know is ok," James quickly replied, looking nervous.

"Oh good, he keeps giving me chocolate," Sasha sighed in relief.

"Well let's just say if your other granddad was alive, he'd just make you make the chocolate," Kathryn commented.

Sasha looked confused, "huh?"

"Oh bad joke mum," James said.

Kathryn smiled uneasily, "well he would have tried to make her do something he'd consider a woman's job. Never mind." She turned to Mark, "let's talk in the passage." She and Mark headed back the way he came in.

"Ok sweetie, I'm going to replicate some new stuff for the wedding. What kind of dress do you want?" James asked.

Sasha giggled, "I want a bright green one."

"Um, why don't we browse through the database before deciding," James muttered. He headed towards the replicator on the other side of the room.

Kathryn closed the glass door in the passage, "ok what do you want to talk about?"

Mark sighed, "Kathy, I have to confess something. Your son was right about me."

"Um, you'll have to specific as he did say a lot about you," Kathryn muttered.

"Andrea was a quick replacement to get over you. Don't get me wrong, I do love her but I'll always love you more," Mark said.

Kathryn stared at him with wide eyes, "why are you telling me this?"

"I'm telling you this because I want us to be together again. You can't marry Chakotay," Mark replied.

"Ok I really do not like Andrea but I wouldn't ever forgive myself if I didn't say this. What you're asking me to do is wrong, you're married to her and you said you're in love with her," Kathryn said.

"I know I do, but I'm not as happy with her as I was with you. Please," Mark said.

Kathryn sighed, "no. I'm sorry Mark but I love Chakotay, and I don't love you anymore."

Mark shook his head, "you can't just fall out of love with anyone."

"Yes you can. If you felt this way why didn't you tell me sooner?" Kathryn asked.

"Remember when I visited your son on Voyager? We had a brief chat, that did make me think about this," Mark replied.

Kathryn groaned, "you shouldn't have listened to him about stuff like this. He doesn't understand what it's like to fall out of love with someone, he doesn't believe that can happen."

"It can't though, that's why," Mark said.

"I'm afraid it can. His experience in stuff like this is just one girl, that's why he doesn't get it. Trust me here, I don't feel the same way about you now," Kathryn sighed. "I'm marrying Chakotay today, you can't change my mind."

"But Kath we were great together. I'm not going to give up on you just because some younger looking guy swept you off your feet. He won't make you as happy as I once did," Mark said.

"He does Mark, in fact he makes me happier than you did. You can't stop me," Kathryn muttered.

"We'll see about that," Mark grumbled. He opened the front door and walked out.

Kathryn headed back into the living room. "James, can you pass Jessie a message for me?"

James glanced away from the replicator, "uh, I'm busy."

Kathryn narrowed her eyes, "what are you doing?"

"Nothing. Jess will be back probably, deliver your own message," James replied. He turned back to the replicator.

Kathryn rolled her eyes, "fine."

Lena walked into the room wearing a white bridesmaid dress, "well this is weird."

Yasmin followed her pouting her lips, she was wearing a similar dress to Lena, "I hate weddings."

Kathryn smiled, "aaw, you both look gorgeous. What a good choice of dresses."

Yasmin looked disgusted as she looked down at herself, "I look stupid."

Lena smiled cheekily, "actually you do with that hair style."

Kathryn nodded her head, "yes she's slightly right. Don't put your hair in a pony tail, just let it down."

Yasmin pouted again, "fine." She took out her bobble.

Jessie walked into the room, she eyed Lena and Yasmin. "Wow, I'm so glad I'm not a bridesmaid." The two girls stared angrily at her.

Kathryn rushed over to her, "oh Jessie, I have a job for you."

"Really? I don't have to wear a dress do I?" Jessie questioned.

Kathryn shook her head, "you can wear anything, as long as it's formal."

"Cool, what is it?" Jessie asked, grinning.

"Triah's easily distracted so I need a second guard if you like. Triah's job is to stop any crashers..." Kathryn replied.

"Yeah I'll do it," Jessie said.

"Great," Kathryn smiled.

"Why those two, can't I do that?" Yasmin moaned.

"I chose them because they're easily irritated recently," Kathryn whispered to her.

Jessie didn't hear her, she smiled sweetly as she walked away.

"I'll be upstairs, I need to get changed now," Kathryn said. She headed for the door, "James can you come with me for a second?"

"Why, I thought you were going to get changed?" James asked, he put Sasha back down onto the ground.

"I am, I just need to talk to you first," Kathryn replied. She left the room. James frowned as he followed her.

Sasha walked up to Jessie holding a new dress, "mummy, what do you think?"

"Uh it's ok, it's a dress so I can't really judge fairly. Why don't you go and put it on," Jessie replied.

"Okay," Sasha said. She ran out of the room.

Duncan meanwhile stared at the new outfit he had, "it's still horrible."

"It's a suit Duncan, they're not meant to be for kids," Jessie commented.

"Then why do I have to wear one?" Duncan moaned.

Lena shrugged, "cos you and Sasha are the ones who go down the aisle first. Everyone who does that has to be dressed to look cute."

"How is this cute?" Duncan snapped. He headed out of the room muttering under his breath.

Meanwhile:
Kathryn and James were in mid conversation as they entered one of the bedrooms.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think he'd listen to me," James said.

"It really shouldn't bother me. Jessie and Triah will stop him easily if he tries anything," Kathryn said.

"True, but if I were you I'd be alert at all times. Take it from someone who nearly had his wedding ruined," James said.

"Good idea, I'll do that. Maybe another coffee would help," Kathryn said, smiling innocently.

"That's not a good idea," James muttered.

A brief flash of light lit up the room for a second. "Well maybe fifty sixth time's the charm," Kiara muttered as she looked around the room.

Kathryn and James stared at her in shock. "Kiara, what are you doing here?" James asked.

Kiara turned to them, "yey I got it right. I'm here for the wedding of course."

"You're not going to blow anything up while you're here, are you?" James asked carefully.

"No. Unless someone gets me really mad, or something. And I mean really," Kiara replied.

Kathryn smiled, "well in that case, it's great to see you again." She rushed over to hug her.

"So are you back for good or..." James questioned.

"Oh no, I'm nowhere near ready to come back for good yet. I do prefer it here so I'm working my ass off, don't worry about that," Kiara replied.

"What about Lena? I don't think she'd be able to handle you leaving a second time," James said.

Kiara looked uncomfortable, "yeah well, I haven't really planned this out. I just wanted to come to the wedding."

The door opened, Lena walked in. "Ok guys, do you think I should do something new with my hair or not..." She then spotted Kiara. "Oh my god."

Kiara looked nervous, "hi Lena."

"When did you get back?" Lena asked.

"Just now," Kiara replied.

"Kiara, I just wondered, do you want to be a bridesmaid?" Kathryn asked.

"Sure why not," Kiara replied.

Later, Durham Cathedral:
Most of the main cast, and regulars were sitting or standing around. A priest was standing at the front waiting around. Jessie and Triah were standing near the main doorway on guard.

B'Elanna, Craig, Emma, Danny, Ian, Daniel, Tani, Kevin, Lilly, Faye, Bryan, Nikki and Noah were on one side of the room, obviously on the groom's side.

Doctor Jones, Annika (wearing a bright white catsuit), Jodie, Zare, Lee, Sandi, Naomi, Neelix, Richard, Angela, Admiral Patterson, Admiral Paris and Admiral Picard were on the opposite side which had to be the bride's side.

An elderly woman walked into the church, "hello young ladies."

"Hello, bride or groom?" Triah asked.

"Bride," the woman replied.

"Oh me too, are you friend or relative?" Jessie asked.

Triah sighed, "uh Jess." Jessie shushed her.

"I'm her Aunt Martha," the woman replied.

"Oh, well I am your niece's daughter in law," Jessie said.

Martha smiled, "oh you're Jessie, yes I heard about you. My goodness you're getting big, is your due date soon?"

"No, two months," Jessie replied.

Triah pouted, "I'm due soon."

"Oh well it was nice to meet you," Martha said.

"Yes you too," Jessie said sweetly. She started to hug her.

Triah rolled her eyes, "ugh I'm so glad I'm passed the emotional stage." She started pouting again, "can I join in?"

"Yeah sure," Jessie replied. Triah joined in the hug.

James walked into the cathedral, he gave the three women a strange look. "Um, get a room?"

Jessie pulled away from Martha and Triah, "oh hello Jamesy." She started to hug him instead.

"Ok so much for being over that stage," James muttered.

Triah pulled away from Martha, "thanks I needed that." A younger woman came in. "Bride or groom?"

"She's my daughter so bride," Martha replied.

"You guys will have to take your seats soon. I came here to tell everyone that they're coming in five minutes," James said.

"Ok, we got here just in time," Martha smiled. She headed over to the seats.

The new arrival was in mid thought, "you're the best man right?"

"Um yeah," James replied.

"Oh yes he is," Jessie giggled as she stroked his arm.

"That's not what she meant Jess," James muttered.

The woman looked rather amused, "it's James right?"

"Yeah, have we met before? I know I just met your mum last night but that's it," James replied.

"Oh yeah we met a few times. I helped your mother look after you when you were little. You and my kids used to play together," the woman said.

"Where are they?" Jessie asked.

The woman shrugged, "beats me, they got here first. Oh I'm Leanne by the way."

"Oh, I'm Jessie, you know..." Jessie said.

"Yeah I do know, you're his wife, I know, I can tell," Leanne said. "Well I guess some things never change."

"What do you mean?" James asked.

"Well I was there when you were in the hospital after you were born. Everyone thought you were adorable, and a lot of different girl nurses and doctors liked to check up on you. You were a hit among the female staff, obviously nothing's changed," Leanne said, giggling slightly. She followed her mother to the seats.

James glanced at Jessie, she was still holding his arm. "I knew it, you were one of those cute babies," she giggled. "Hmm, I need the names of those doctors and nurses, I'm going to kill them."

"Jess, do me a favour," James said.

"Ok," Jessie said.

"Please decide which mood you want to be in and stick with it, please," James said, he headed back out.

"What does he mean by that?" Jessie asked in Triah's direction.

She shrugged, "well first you were emotional, next you were hyper and flirty, next just hyper, you were angry and now you're hyper again."

"Ok, like you're any better," Jessie grumbled.

"And angry again," Triah commented.

"Sure whatever," Jessie said.

Meanwhile:
Mark was quickly heading towards the cathedral, Andrea was right behind him. "I don't get what this is about, what's the big rush?" she asked.

"I told you last night," Mark muttered.

"I don't believe it for a second," Andrea snapped.

"I have to stop the wedding," Mark said. He stormed into the cathedral.

Meanwhile again:
In: "Paris to Crasher Guards."

"Cool," Triah giggled, she took a commbadge out and tapped it. "Crasher Guard One here."

In: "Mark has entered the building, repeat Mark has entered the building."

"Let's go," Jessie said. She and Triah rushed out of the room. They passed a few unknown people, one of them was drunk.

"You're not supposed to drink until after the ceremony," one guy said.

"Who cares, no one will notice," the drunk guy grumbled. He dropped a bottle onto the floor, it smashed and the stuff inside stained the carpet.

Triah gasped, "oh god." She rushed over to clean it up.

Jessie groaned, "fine I'll do it myself." She continued on but didn't have to walk too far, Mark was just around the corner. "What are you doing?"

"I'm here to stop the wedding, what do you think!" Mark snapped at her.

Andrea rushed up to him when he stopped, "I really don't understand why."

"I'm sorry but you're not ruining anyone's wedding, not on my shift," Jessie said.

"I have to stop the wedding and I'm not going to be stopped by a little girl," Mark grumbled.

Andrea's eyes widened, "um you don't want to piss this one off."

Jessie had narrowed her eyes, "he already has."

"Listen sweetheart, she can't marry Chakotay. If you don't get out of my way I'll..." Mark snapped.

"Or you'll what?" Jessie grumbled. She stepped closer to him. "I can kill you just using one fist, so don't tempt me old man. If you want to stop the wedding, fine, you come through me first and believe me, you won't survive. Of course if I am merciful you will survive, you'll just wish you hadn't."

"I just want to point out Marky, if you had married Janeway this girl would have been your daughter in law," Andrea whispered to him.

Mark's eyes widened, "oh, I'm sorry we'll go."

Jessie's face softened up, "but you're not supposed to give up yet." Mark and Andrea turned around, they went back the way they came. "Janeway's hair is tied up again, you know you want to make fun of that." They both walked faster, Jessie followed them.

Five minutes later:
The music started so everyone sat down in their seats. Duncan, Sasha, Johnathan, Kirsty and Kyle all started to walk down the aisle. Of course a few people were going, "aaaw."

"Who said that, I'm going to smack them," Duncan grumbled quietly. Tom and Harry started to come down the aisle not far behind them.

"I think one was Tom," Kirsty lied. They all reached the end of the aisle. Duncan kicked Tom in the leg once he'd caught up.

"Ow, Duncan, that wasn't very nice," Tom moaned.

"Shh," Harry shushed him. He moved over to stand on the opposite side to him.

Chakotay arrived, he started to walk down the aisle with his sister Taiya and his mother. Once they'd gotten to the end, his mother kissed him on the cheek. "Congratulations," she said. She went to sit down in the front row, the side where the kids and Tom were.

"More like, it's about time big guy," Taiya giggled. She sat down next to her mother. Chakotay shook his head.

Kathryn came into the room, she had James and Gretchen on both sides of her. Lena, Yasmin, Phoebe, Kes and Kiara were following her, all in bridesmaid dresses.

Once they reached the end, the bridesmaids and James all went to stand on Harry's side. Gretchen kissed her daughter on the forehead. "Make sure you throw the bouquet to Phoebe," she whispered.

"Ok mum, I'll try," Kathryn whispered. She stood opposite Chakotay.

Gretchen sat down on the other side of the first row. Triah quickly sat down in the nearest row, Jessie walked to the front the long way. She stood next to James.

"Dearly beloved, we are all gathered here today to witness Kathryn Janeway and Chakotay being joined together in holy matrimony. If anyone here feels that these two should not be wed, please speak now or forever hold your peace."

Richard jumped onto his feet looking slightly drunk, he was of course holding what looked like a glass of water. "I object! I'm in love with Janeway!"

James and Jessie glanced at each other, eyes wide in horror. "Oh god, Jess," James muttered.

"I'm on it," Jessie grumbled. She headed over to his row, "daddy get here."

"Hello sweetie," Richard laughed. "Want some water?"

"No, sit down and shut up!" Jessie snapped. She snatched the water off of him.

Johnathan just giggled, Tom looked down at him not looking too happy.

Duncan looked disgusted, "ok, that was disturbing."

The priest sighed, "anyone else?"

Doctor Jones climbed onto his feet, also looking drunk. "I object cos I feel like it!" B'Elanna leaned over and fiddled with his emitter, he turned back to normal instantly. "I'm sorry about that, dunno what came over me."

"Very well, let's continue. Let's move to the vows," the priest said.

Kathryn and Chakotay said their vows, after Chakotay finished they leaned in to kiss each other.

"Um, that's at the end," the priest butted in. They both separated again. "Kathryn Janeway, do you take Chakotay to be your lawful wedded husband? To..."

"Yes yes I do," Kathryn quickly replied.

"Ok. Chakotay do you take Kathryn Janeway to be your lawful wedded wife?" the priest questioned.

"I do," Chakotay replied.

Tom stepped forward to hand him the ring, Harry did the same for Kathryn. They put the wedding rings onto each others fingers.

"By the power bested in me by a lot of people, yes the writer is clueless there, I now pronounce you husband and wife," the priest said. He smiled, "you may kiss the bride." Kathryn and Chakotay put their arms around each other, and kissed. Mostly everybody cheered and or clapped.

Kathryn turned around, she threw the bouquet over her shoulder. Most of the girls lunged for it, Phoebe looked like she was going to catch it but Annika pushed her out of the way and caught it.

"Yes, I win, ooh pretty flowers," Annika giggled. All the other girls groaned in disappointment.

"I don't think we'll see another wedding anytime soon," James said.

"Maybe that's for the best," Yasmin groaned as she looked down at her dress.

Later, Lumley Castle:
The party was once again going on in the same place as the previous night.

"My god woman, what are you wearing?" Naomi snapped as she walked over to Annika.

Annika frowned, "what do you mean?"

"That, why are you wearing that fashion disaster? My god, it's so horrible and it's white and it's bright and it's..." Naomi ranted on, she fainted.

"Aaaw, someone had too much to drink," Annika giggled. She walked away.

Kes nearby sighed, "well I think I'd better go. Neelix looks like he's going to try streaking again."

Kathryn, Chakotay, Kiara and Lena glanced over at Neelix, he was trying to climb onto a table.

"Oh don't bother. Jessie!" Kathryn yelled.

Jessie rushed over, "what what?"

"Can you throw Neelix out?" Kathryn asked.

"With pleasure," Jessie grinned. She headed over to Neelix, she took a hold of his arm and dragged him over to an open window. She pushed him out of it.

"Uh... I didn't mean literally," Kathryn muttered.

Jessie tried to look innocent, "it'll teach him a lesson."

"I'll get Doctor Jones," Chakotay said. He walked away.

"Actually I'd better go too. The sooner I get back the sooner I finish training," Kiara said.

Lena glanced at her, "do you know when you'll finish that?"

"I don't know, Q says I am slow at learning most of his lessons," Kiara replied.

"Oh," Lena said.

"It's ok, I may be able to sneak away from him further into my training. I'll come and visit then," Kiara smiled.

"Good, make sure you learn that one quickly," Lena said.

"Will do," Kiara said. She and Lena hugged.

Nearby Tom and B'Elanna were telling off Johnathan. "It's not funny Johnathan," Tom snapped.

"Er yes it is," Johnathan giggled.

"Well you got admit it is," Tom said to B'Elanna, she glared at him.

"Ok it may have been funny but it was wrong. I want you to apologise to Harry and Richard," B'Elanna said.

"What about Annika?" Tom questioned.

"What about her?" B'Elanna grumbled.

Tom shrugged, "forget it."

 

****THE END****

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