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Episode Synopsis
During a reunion with the FVDA crew, both ships are attacked by a ship from the twenty ninth century. The battle sends Voyager accidentally back to the twenty first century.

Written
9th - 11th & 16th April 2005
Parts 3/4
24th April, 1st, 3rd, 18th, 19th May, 4th & 21st June 2005

Episode Based In
April 2005 / July 2372 (early season 3)

 

Voyager
The Bridge:
Everyone there were in their usual places, well except Tuvok who was still at the Engineering station.

"How long is it going to take to repair that hole?" Kathryn asked.

Chakotay shrugged, "I'd say another few days. It's not top priority at the moment."

"It's the bridge, it so should be," Kathryn said. "Oh well, I'll just have to drink all my coffee out here," she said as she sipped on a big cup of coffee.

"Captain, the FDA ship has just uncloaked," Harry said.

Kathryn groaned, "whatever, main viewer."

The FDA ship appeared on the viewscreen looking badly damaged, and floating around like it was adrift.

Chakotay stood up, "what happened to it?"

"I don't know, it looks like alien phaser burns on the hull. I don't recognise the type though," Harry replied.

"You know what we have to do," Chakotay said, glancing at Kathryn.

"What, finish it off?" Kathryn questioned.

"No, rescue any survivors. They helped us out with the memory problem," Chakotay replied.

"No one's forgetting that they probably lied about who did it in the first place," Tom said. "Right?"

"No, but I doubt it was them, they gave us the cure didn't they?" Kathryn muttered. "Fine, rescue them this once. But get security to guard Sickbay."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," Chakotay said. "Tuvok, see to it. Harry, beam them aboard in about five minutes."

Harry nodded his head, "um aye sir."

Sickbay:
"What's the matter with you? You know what kind of morons I have on my crew," Damien snapped at the Doctor.

"Every life is important. Further more I didn't actually do the transporting. I wish everyone would realise that," he muttered.

"Ha right, important? These guys should have been dead centuries ago. Who cares?" Damien said.

"And whose fault is it that they're annoying you now?" the Doctor asked smugly. Damien narrowed his eyes.

Kathryn and Chakotay walked into the room. "Obviously the others were killed during whatever happened," Chakotay was saying.

"What's that?" Damien questioned as he glanced at them.

"We only managed to beam seven of you, I'm sure there would have been more. Are all seven accounted for?" Chakotay asked.

"Unfortunately," Damien grumbled, he quickly passed a stony glare to the Doctor. "The most damaged part of the ship was on the cleaner's quarters deck. I only have one cleaner now."

"Finally, we can now go to the public toilets instead of sneaking into the one in Damien's office," Gareth whispered. Johnny Junior groaned, he elbowed him hard.

"You're welcome, really," Chakotay muttered.

"Ahem, well you're welcome to prepare for trouble," Johnny said. He glared at the others. Myleene jumped up to stand next to him.

"Uh and you should thank us for making it double," she said. The new version of the TR music quickly started and then sped up to catch up.

"To protect the universe from randy, perverted celebrity managers," Johnny said. An older guy nearby rolled his eyes.

"To perfect our ship by buying some more bandages," Myleene said, shrugging.

"I knew I forgot to buy something last week," Justin muttered.

"To pretend to..." Johnny said slowly, while trying to think.

"Ok enough!" Damien snapped. The music stopped abruptly. "This is way too old."

"Remind me again why we saved these guys," Kathryn whispered to Chakotay.

"Strangely I've just forgotten," he said.

Damien shook his head and stepped forward, "you know it's not too late to send them all back."

"I wouldn't recommend it. Everyone of them was suffering from radiation poisoning," the Doctor said.

"Your point being?" Damien commented.

"What happened?" Kathryn asked.

"I don't know. These aliens just attacked us, I've never seen them before," Damien replied.

"Yeah, we were in the middle of setting up the tra..." Justin said. Damien quickly smacked him, then smiled at the command team.

"Setting up a what?" Kathryn questioned.

"Oh a track. He's trying to do music again, with a dog or something," Damien replied. "The attack was a relief actually."

"It's Snoop Dog," Justin muttered, pouting.

"I was hoping he forgot," Damien said.

"Hey that's probably why we were attacked," Johnny Junior said.

In: "Tuvok to Janeway, please report to the bridge."

"On my way," Kathryn said with a smirk on her face. She left the room.

The lights dimmed, the siren and the red lights started to flash. "Oh great, they're back. My ship better not be in more danger, it's a good ship," Damien said.

Chakotay rolled his eyes, "I know where you're going with this. Just find yourself a good window somewhere, two Security guys will take you." He followed Kathryn out.

The Bridge:
Kathryn and Chakotay stepped out of the turbolift. "Report," she said.

"There's a temporal rift forming next to the FDA ship," Harry replied.

"Not again," Chakotay groaned.

"There's a ship approaching from it," Harry said with a yawn. Everyone else braced themselves, well not really. "Federation, why is it always Federation?"

"Hail it," Kathryn ordered.

"Temporal anomaly, it's Federation, it's not hailable," Chakotay muttered.

Harry frowned, "there's an energy build up." The bridge lit up, then everything shook violently.

"What the?" Kathryn said. A smashing sound startled everyone, everyone looked towards the source. As soon as they did, everyone but Kathryn were fearing for their lives. "My big cup of coffee!" she screamed.

Jessie chose that moment to walk onto the bridge, she almost ran into Chakotay and Kathryn. The bridge lit up and shook again. "What's going on this time?"

"My cup of coffee," Kathryn cried. She turned to Jessie. "I blame this on you."

"Me? I just walked in," Jessie said.

"All right fine, next time I'll blame you," Kathryn grumbled. "Damien, where is that asshole, I'll kill him!"

Chakotay put a hand on her arm, "calm down Kathryn, you can kill him after we get blown up."

A minute or two earlier
Deck Two:
James stepped out of the turbolift, he bumped straight into Damien, who was watching out of the big window.

"Hey, how did you get here?" James asked.

"The guys guarding Sickbay were too busy gambling to notice," Damien replied.

"They weren't gambling with rations, were they?" James questioned.

"Nope, hyposprays," Damien replied.

"Yeah thought so. Most of the unknowns prefer suicide to being stupidly killed off instead of regulars or main guys," James said.

"Suicide ey," Damien said with an evil smile on his face. "I was always good with the gambling."

"Hey, be my guest," James muttered.

Damien glared at him, "no, kill my crew and make it look like suicide. I've been planning to ditch them for months. They think I'm just messing around with you guys, you know with that memory thing."

"That was you?" James said. He frowned, "why did I sound surprised?"

"Because it was a brilliant plan of mine to lower my crew's guard. Even an imbecile like you can understand that, right?" Damien replied.

"You know, you're this close to getting a broken face," James muttered.

Damien didn't seem bothered, "you're not unproving my point. Only stupid people would use violence or sarcasm as a retort."

"And only stupid people would piss me off," James grumbled, clenching his fists.

"Jeez, take a pill," Damien said. He smiled evily, "I could win you a hypospray of your own, if you want."

The ship shook again. They both glanced out of the window and saw the FDA ship in pieces.

"Oh crap," they both muttered. "Seventy years of you guys." They both glanced at each other with raised eyebrows.

The Bridge:
"And then we tranpublicfy the phasers to a spectalathon setting," Harry was busy rambling on.

"Harry I have no idea what you just said, but just do it. I can't have my precious coffee, er ship destroyed," Kathryn said.

"Ohno, we can't have that," Jessie commented.

"I take it that coffee cravings gone, huh," Chakotay said quietly.

Kathryn's stare turned even colder, she slapped both of them at the same time. "No one insults or steals my coffee," she said.

"I didn't do either," Chakotay muttered.

Kathryn rolled her eyes, "ok I undo the slap, god." She glanced away from him just to get a similar slap from Jessie. "Hey!"

"Don't ever touch me again, stupid coffee bitch," she grumbled. The glare on her face even managed to out match Kathryn's. "Do you understand me?" She walked off towards the Engineering station, "stupid f***** Chakotay loving whore."

Tom looked rather worried, "great work Captain."

"What the hell are you doing at my station you Vulcan tosser?" Jessie snapped at Tuvok.

Harry looked uneasy, "it seems to have worked by the way. The ship's hailing."

"Suddenly he or she's talkative. On screen," Kathryn said as she headed for the centre of the bridge. Chakotay did the same while watching Jessie.

A human guy appeared on the screen. "I am Captain Braxton of the Federation Timeship Aeon."

"Big f***** deal," Jessie grumbled.

Kathryn sighed, "she'll be moving onto another mood soon enough, hopefully."

"Um, ok. I'm from twenty ninth century Earth, I'm here to avert a disaster in my century that destroys the entire solar system," Braxton said.

"Well that made more sense than Harry's crap before," Jessie commented. Harry tried not to pout, but failed miserably.

"Anyway, your ship was in the debris. My mission is your destruction. You must not resist," Braxton said.

"I really don't think we would have been able to effect your century, and.." Kathryn said.

"Oh so you're here to save your own ass, well I hope one member of your family is on this ship so you won't bloody exist," Jessie grumbled.

"Now that's a paradox," Tom commented.

"And by the way, you're too fat ok. I figured by the twenty ninth century they'd have cured that, I guess you just like being fat. Oh and you're ugly and stupid," Jessie continued to ramble. Everyone on the bridge was getting more nervous with every word. "Oh and if you're Starfleet, wouldn't destroying this ship mess up the timeline?"

Braxton started sniffling, "I'm big boned ok, and destroying Voyager would not mess up the timeline. On the contrary..."

"So what's your excuse for the other ship being blown up huh? And explain to me why killing us all wouldn't effect anything. Time crap only happens because prats like you keep coming back in time to mess around in the first place. So get a life you fat..." Jessie grumbled.

"Jessie, breathe between each insult," Tom said, trying not to laugh.

Braxton started crying, the viewscreen changed back to the rift view.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner," Tom laughed.

"What are you laughing at Tom? The size of the nose on your face, the pretty colours on your console, or the fact that you have hands?" Jessie asked.

Tom started pouting, "I was cheering you on, you're mean."

Harry was now a lot paler than usual, "I think she's making up for lost time. I haven't seen her lose her rag for a while."

"Aaw, what's wrong Harry? Do you need your nappies changing again?" Jessie asked. "Go on Janeway."

Kathryn was busy fuming, Chakotay held her back. "Ok Jess, you've got to calm down."

"I didn't give you permission to call me that. Don't you have to hit on me a lot to get that permission, isn't that right Janeway?" Jessie said.

"Maybe we should get sedatives," Chakotay whispered. "We should've guessed that a girl like Jessie would be dangerous during mood swings."

"Oh my god, are you two whispering flirts to each other again? I'd say get a room but I doubt that Harry's techno crap will last anymore than ten seconds, and it probably takes Chakotay eleven," Jessie commented.

"Ok, is there anyone on the bridge she hasn't insulted?" Tom asked.

"Oh you can talk with all that mush about James about two months ago, and all your bigger mush afterwards!" Kathryn snapped back.

"He's firing again. Thank god," Harry sighed in relief.

"Oh Janeway, you had a chance to make fun of James the same way she did to Chakotay," Tom moaned.

Jessie rolled her eyes, "for god's sake Tom, if you love James so much, why don't you go to a screwy alternate reality where he's gay and get off with him." Tom started sniffling.

Right on cue James and Damien came onto the bridge. "Do absolutely anything and I'll break something."

"Ok, can I breathe?" Damien muttered.

"No," James replied. The ship started shaking again.

Harry groaned, "um, suggestions?"

"James, will you..." Tom said.

"Sorry Tom, you haven't dimension jumped yet," Jessie muttered.

Tom glared at her, "I was going to say, muzzle your woman, please!"

"Ok I don't know where to begin with that," James said. "Oh I do, what?"

"Fine, I'll do it myself," Harry muttered to himself. He started keying in something.

Kathryn shook her head, "she's trying for bitch of the year. As Tom said, we have a winner. Right Jessie?"

Jessie glanced at her with a confused look on her face, "what?" She giggled, "you're crazy Janeway." She walked over to stand near James.

Kathryn sighed in relief, "finally."

Damien made his way over to Harry, James shook his head and followed him, of course Jessie followed too. "What are you doing?" Damien asked.

Harry glanced at him, "re-modulating the thingmatron."

"You fool, that'll just delay him. Just transport some of the content from the kitchen into a torpedo. Rig it to explode next to the other ship. Not one ship will be able to live through that," Damien said.

"That's the stupidest plan I've ever heard," Kathryn muttered.

"Since about five episodes ago, right Kathryn," Chakotay commented.

Kathryn started blushing, "fine, do it."

"Fine, beaming all the Leola root into a torpedo. Ok explain to me how I do that," Harry said.

"Oh fine," Damien grumbled. He pushed Harry away and started working on the station himself.

On the viewscreen lots of Leola roots dematerialised surrounding the time ship.

"Brilliant," Kathryn sarcastically said. She pulled out a contract, "how many seasons do I have left of this ridiculous series?" Her eyes widened, "damn it!"

"I wasn't finished yet anyway," Damien muttered. "Tactical, fire phasers at the Leola root."

"Captain?" Tuvok said.

Kathryn threw her hands into the air, not literally, "why do I have to make all the decisions around here? What's the point."

Chakotay shook his head, "just do it."

"Firing," Tuvok said.

The blast threw the time ship backwards, it disappeared into the rift.

"Oh, so that's what Leola root is for," Harry said.

Damien nodded, "yep, one species uses it to fuel their explosives."

The ship started shaking again. "Oh crap, we're being pulled into the rift," Tom said.

"Uh, why?" Chakotay questioned.

"Beats me, Harry's the geek," Tom replied.

A while light blinded them for a few seconds as they hit the rift. Once it had lifted, the crew looked around confused.

"Rift's gone," Harry muttered.

Tom started blushing, "oops, my elbow was resting on one of the increase speed buttons, sorry." Everyone glared at him. He quickly glanced back to the front of the room to avoid them.

"We need to figure out where we are. Harry?" Kathryn sighed.

"Captain, Earth," Tom said.

"For god's sake Tom, knowing you it'll be a planet that looks like it," Chakotay grumbled.

"No, it isn't. Look," Tom said, pointing at the screen. Everyone glanced at the viewscreen, most of them widened their eyes.

"This is not good," Jessie said.

"Hail Starfleet Command," Kathryn ordered.

"Why, we went through a tem..." James started to say.

"Yes ma'am," Harry giddily said.

Damien shook his head, "I can't believe you guys used to thwart my attempts to kill you or whatever. You're all, more or less so stupid."

"We're getting different kinds of signals, it's EM," Harry frowned. "Not subspace."

"Lets hear it," Kathryn ordered.

The room was overwhelmed by the sound of mixed radio stations, people talking and modems connecting. Faintly in the background you could hear some guy mumbling about a candy shop, or something to some repetitive 'music'. Harry quickly fiddled with the controls to switch it off.

"I think the question is not where are we, but when," Kathryn said.

"Really?" Tom sarcastically said.

"Well Harry?" Kathryn said, eyeing Tom.

"Um, we're in the twenty first century ma'am," Harry replied nervously.

"Oh god, please tell me it isn't First Contact, again," Chakotay groaned.

"No, 2005," Harry said.

"Ooh, does this mean we can get a better copy of the dubbed Pokémon specials? The computer only has crappy ones," Jessie asked. Everyone stared at her funny. "No, it hasn't been dubbed yet. Oh well."

"There was only two good ones anyway," James said quietly to her.

Kathryn shook it off, "ookay, think people. We're stuck in 2005, that time ship got pulled through so is that here?"

"Can I just point out that Earth has satellites in orbit in this century, we need to stay clear of them," Tom said.

"Noted, you sort that out," Kathryn muttered. "Well?"

"Yes ma'am. There's a subspace signature in San Francisco, America," Harry replied. "It's scattered throughout though."

Chakotay sighed, "if we want to avoid being noticed by the locals, I wouldn't advice one small team looking around the whole area for hours."

"Smaller teams, less time, good idea," Kathryn said. "Four teams of three or four should do it."

Damien cleared his throat, "can I be in one?"

Kathryn laughed, "ha yeah right. A good chance to pick up more celebrities, Damien?"

"Hey, I asked didn't I?" Damien said. "And no, I've got enough losers already. Hmm, maybe I can send them back."

"Don't even dare, you could tamper with the timeline," Kathryn snapped.

"Right, and about twelve of you guys wandering around with tricorders wouldn't," Damien muttered.

"You're not going and that's final. Remember who's side you're on now," Chakotay said.

Damien rolled his eyes, "that doesn't mean I take orders from the psycho woman."

"Yeah, nobody takes orders from Jessie," Tom sniggered.

Jessie glanced over at him, "what, huh?"

Tom smiled sweetly, "oh nothing."

"Ok that's enough. Tuvok, you're in command. Chakotay, Tom, James and I uh..." Kathryn said. She glanced around the room, Harry smiled eagerly and pointed at himself. Then she spotted Jessie fiddling with James' sleeve. "Jessie, as long as her and James are apart."

Jessie pouted, "but why?"

"Yeah why? She calmed down when he came in," Tom questioned.

"Convenience," Kathryn quickly replied. She tapped her commbadge, "Janeway to Torres, report to transporter room one."

"We still need six more," Chakotay pointed out.

"Oh fine, Harry you're in command, Tuvok join us," Kathryn said.

"Is that wise, he's only an ensign," Tom muttered.

"I think we all know who has the most command experience on this ship once you guys are gone," Damien smugly said.

"Fine, you and Harry work together, but remember Harry is still in charge," Kathryn said.

Chakotay sighed, "five more."

"Then you pick the rest, god," Kathryn grumbled. She headed towards the turbolift. Everyone picked, excluding Chakotay followed her.

"First, I need to get more known people to the bridge," he sighed.

Transporter Room One:
B'Elanna strolled in and joined the rest of the awayteam. She eyed Tom funny, "why is he coming?"

"Expert on the century we're in," Kathryn shrugged.

"Actually that's twentieth century," Tom said.

Kathryn glared in his direction, "first you bring us here, now this!"

Tom cowered, "it's only five years into the twenty first, we'll be fine."

Chakotay walked in. Claire, Lee, Faye, Lisa and Craig followed him. "There, twelve."

"Finally, lets make this quicker. Two teams go to the second room, two others will stay here," Kathryn said.

"We haven't even picked team leaders," Chakotay commented.

Kathryn groaned, "easy, that's me, you, Tuvok and..." She looked around, "oh great, Tom's the highest rank."

"Actually," both Craig and B'Elanna cut in.

"He's a bridge officer, Craig you're too young and... when did you get promoted?" Kathryn asked.

Chakotay groaned, "Claire, Jessie, you're with me. B'Elanna and Craig are with Tuvok, if that helps with the seniority problem. Faye and Lisa with the Captain."

"What, that leaves me with James," Tom moaned.

"And me," Lee said.

"I can already tell this'll be a lot of fun," James said.

Earth, San Francisco:
Chakotay, Jessie and Claire stepped out of an alley, they were quickly blinded by the sunlight.

"Great, do you know what this looks like?" Jessie said.

"No, what?" Chakotay questioned.

"Guy, two girls, alley," Jessie replied. She walked away looking disgusted. Claire quickly followed her.

Chakotay groaned, "this should be interesting."

Meanwhile:
Kathryn, Faye and Lisa stepped out of a more rundown alley, and into an even more run down old looking street. It was creepily quiet, nobody was around and the whole place looked like everyone had left in a hurry.

"This isn't San Francisco," Kathryn stuttered. She pulled out a tricorder.

"Well at least we don't have to worry about fitting in," Faye cheerfully said. She took off a jacket she had on, "boy it's hot here though."

Lisa did the same, "oh yeah, where on earth are we?"

Kathryn was turning a little paler, "on the island of Cyprus."

"What's the problem? We can have a mini holiday," Faye said.

"We're in the early twenty first century, in the Turk side of Nicosia," Kathryn stuttered.

"And?" Lisa muttered.

"Nobody is allowed in the Turk controlled area, trespassers are usually shot," Kathryn replied. Faye turned pale too.

"Well we might get lucky, I'm sure sometime in this century they give the land back," Lisa said. They jumped at the sound of yelling. A gun shot was heard, a small hole appeared in front of them at the same time.

"Us lucky, never," Kathryn said.

A few Turkish guys surrounded them, pointing guns at them. They spoke, but the girls could not understand them.

"Um, translators are not working," Kathryn whispered.

"Then why are you whispering?" Lisa asked.

"They might know English, we don't know their language," Kathryn replied.

The guys continued yelling in their direction.

"Um, we're screwed, I hoped I wouldn't die like this," Faye stuttered.

Another guy pushed passed two of the others, he stopped in front of them. He yelled something at the others, they all lowered their rifles. Instead they all went forward to grab the team.

"Uh, suggestions?" Faye stuttered.

"Let them, it's better than being shot," Kathryn replied. "Hopefully Voyager will get us out when we're alone."

"If..." Faye muttered.

Meanwhile again:
B'Elanna, Tuvok and Craig also stepped out of an alley. They entered a busy street, nearby one of many stone bridges crossing a river. They looked around all confused. B'Elanna quickly lowered the cap she had on a little to hide her forehead ridges.

"Well, America's nice," Craig commented.

"No, I don't think this is," B'Elanna said as she eyed a building on the other side of the river. Tuvok and Craig looked around to look at what she was looking at. Just across the river was Notre Dame.

"Well, maybe Tom should've swapped with you anyway. We're in Paris," Craig said.

"Hmm yeah," B'Elanna sighed.

Tuvok turned back to the alley, he tapped his commbadge, "Tuvok to Voyager." No answer.

B'Elanna turned back too, "Tuvok?"

He turned back, "we appear to have lost communication with Voyager."

Craig's eyes lit up, "do you know what this means?"

Tuvok and B'Elanna glanced at him. "No," B'Elanna replied.

"Well we replicated money, we're a little drive away from Disney Land," Craig said.

"Oh good god," B'Elanna groaned while Tuvok raised an eyebrow.

Last meanwhile for a.. um, while:
A few girl's screams echoed around a long corridor, startling everyone walking through it. A few girls ran out of one of the doors, two were just laughing while the others looked freaked out.

"What, what's wrong?" one guy asked a girl.

"These guys stepped out of the stalls," she replied.

"In the girls toilets?" the guy said with a smirk.

Tom stuck his head out of the door, he blushed madly as he went back in. He tried to close the door but struggled to move it just an inch. Suddenly it slammed closed. Tom glanced at James nearby, "uh thanks."

"Whatever, but I don't know why I did it. The longer we're in here..." he said.

Lee started fidgeting, "yeah I'm with you, and I think there's girls still in the other stalls."

James smiled, "I've got an idea."

Tom looked nervous, "I don't like that smile, what are you planning?"

James pulled the door back open and grabbed a hold of Tom's arm, "just go with the flow." He pushed him out of the room, he fell to the floor. "Tom, that wasn't funny!" he yelled as he stepped out.

Lee shrugged, he slowly did the same. "Yeah, that was..." He noticed a lot of people smirking at them.

Tom looked confused, "I didn't do anything."

"What was it, did you put vodka in again or did you just..." James said.

Tom caught on, he quickly got back up, "guys lighten up, this is a stag night right?"

Lee glanced at his watch, "isn't it suppose to be day here?"

"It's the only way I could get you to see girls," Tom said nervously as he glanced around at the audience.

James groaned, "how we managed to get in there without the girls noticing is beyond me."

"An artist doesn't uh... give away his secrets, wait is that a chef?" Tom muttered. Lee and James stared blankly at him. "Come on you pansies, you can get your own back later." He rushed down the corridor.

"Ookay, sorry about that," James muttered as he started to follow. Lee did the same. "Sorry, that was the best I could come up with."

"It was ok, I guess," Lee stuttered. "Very embarrassing."

"Look on the bright side, all of these people will be dead when we get back, so we'll never see them again," James said quietly. They both bumped into Tom who had stopped at the doorway at the end of the corridor. "Tom, what are you doing?"

"Well one, we're indoors and two, I don't recognise the building," Tom replied.

"Well duh, it probably was pulled down long before we came about," Lee commented.

James looked around with wide eyes, "oh I recognise it." The others glanced at him. "This is the old Metro Centre."

"A shopping centre obviously," Tom muttered, eyeing the stores Game and Burger King. "I still don't recognise it."

"That's probably cos we're not in San Francisco," James said.

Tom frowned, "well, where are we?"

"Welcome to my neighbourhood, well more or less," James replied.

Two girls walked passed them, giggling between them. Lee glanced at his companions, "can we leave this uh spot?"

"We really should, we need a quiet place to contact Voyager," James said.

"Well tell me wise one, where is a quiet place?" Tom asked.

Voyager:
"I don't understand it," Harry muttered.

"Come on science boy. What do you think you've been eating the last few years?" Damien said.

"Well it would explain my stomach bugs," Harry sheepishly said.

Danny and Ian stepped out of the turbolift. "Reporting for duty," Danny said. She eyed Harry, then Damien. "Ok, where's the bosses?"

"You're looking at him," both Harry and Damien replied, they glared at each other.

"Great, we're so screwed," Ian muttered.

In: "Transporter room to Bridge."

Harry tapped his commbadge, "Bridge here."

"As I'm stuck on this ship, don't I get one of those?" Damien asked.

"Shush," Harry muttered. "What is it?"

In: "The strangest thing happened. I thought it was just an error on my part, but it happened to the other transporter officer too."

Harry frowned as he moved away from his station, "what did?"

In: "Well Janeway's team got sent to one of the Greek islands instead of America."

"How funny, I doubt they'd have a Costa Coffee place in sight in this day and age," Damien sneered.

In: "Not in the Turkish side of Cyprus no, I know my history."

Harry looked rather pale, "oh god, get them back."

In: "Don't you think we tried? Something's blocking the signal, and guess what?"

"What, another team joined them?" Danny said.

In: "Not exactly, the other two teams got sent elsewhere. Paris' team was sent to the UK, and Tuvok's to Paris."

"Shouldn't it have been the other way round, that would have been funny to say," Danny giggled.

In: "Again something blocked the signals."

"Well at the moment I think the Captain's team is our top priority," Harry said.

Damien nodded, "agreed, I want to get down there to watch Janeway get shot by Turks, oh fun."

Harry stared blankly at him, "you're sick."

"Well duh, ex villain, I'm evil," Damien muttered.

"So remind me again why Janeway told you to help me command?" Harry grumbled.

"Can we transport down to help her?" Ian asked.

"I doubt it, we'll just end up elsewhere too," Harry replied.

"I find it weird that something blocked a transporter signal, and instead of destroying it, they sent it to another destination. It doesn't sound random to me," Damien said.

"You think Braxton is trying to stop us interfering?" Harry questioned.

"It's a good idea. But what I don't get either is why send Tuvok and Tom to neutral countries, and Janeway to a ghost town guarded by people named after a bird you eat at Christmas," Damien replied.

Danny sniggered, "I always wondered why they called the country Turkey."

"We're in the twenty first century remember, the other teams could be in danger too. They could have sent Tom's team to a gang's hideout, uh the prime ministers office or in a jail cell. Tuvok's, well same," Harry said.

"So, what do we do?" Danny asked.

Harry keyed in a few commands, "they haven't contacted us about this yet, so this is a long shot." He shook his head, "nope, same signal is blocking communications."

"Here's a thought, scan for lifesigns in the supposed ghost town. Then we'll know if the team are ok," Ian said.

Harry nodded, "right, but for all we know they could be Turkish."

Damien fiddled with the station, "there are more than three in the empty half of Nicosia, the other place is empty."

"That could mean..." Harry stuttered.

"A lot. One, they appeared in the other city and got shot. Two, they're in the other half and are getting ambushed, or already have," Danny said. "Or they were shot there already."

"There is one thing we can do," Damien said.

Harry glanced at him, "as long as it doesn't involve violence, or anything that'll..."

"Or effect the timeline, whatever Kim," Damien groaned. "Something's obviously happened to Janeway, or going to, so we already have big time. The Turks might think of this as an act of aggression and declare war. Or they might just find commbadges and tricorders, that's enough to screw things up."

"That's why we can't do anything more," Harry muttered. "What is the plan anyway?"

Cyprus, inside a small prison:
Kathryn, Faye and Lisa were all in two cells, Kathryn on her own and the other two sharing one.

"You don't think they'll execute us, do you?" Lisa asked.

Faye shuddered, "I dunno, we're in the twenty first century but these guys. Maybe they still believe in the death penalty."

"America even still do it, but only for extreme cases," Kathryn said.

"It was an accident, can't we just tell them that. Surely one person knows English," Lisa said.

"Oh yeah, how would you tell them Lis? Hey mister, we accidentally beamed here from our ship from the future. We just wanted to find a ship that can go back and forth in time," Faye sarcastically said. "Actually that's kinda good, you won't be executed, you'll be thrown in a loony bin."

"I'm sure we still could have gotten in here accidentally," Lisa muttered.

"Not really, it's not easy for common people to get in," Kathryn said.

"Oh I got it," Lisa said. "I flirt with a guard, sneakily get the keys out, and when's he gone. Well you know the rest."

Kathryn frowned, "I doubt that's a good idea."

"It's brilliant," Lisa said. She walked over to the bars, she cleared her throat to get the guard's attention. He glanced briefly at her. "Hey um, come here handsome," she said, beckoning her finger.

"Oh god," Faye groaned. "Slut alert."

Lisa glanced back at her with a glare, "you're lucky you have me here at all, be thankful." She glanced back to find the guy really close to the bars. She jumped a little, "oh, that works. Anyway, are these the ones who are pervs and everything?"

"I don't know, but I think that their women are suppose to be all shy, sweet and have hidden faces," Kathryn said, folding her arms.

"What does that mean?" Lisa said while smiling sweetly at the guy.

"It means that sluts in their country probably get burned at the stake," Faye said, sniggering a little.

Lisa's eyes widened, "ok screw that plan." She backed away.

"I think that's an exaggeration," Kathryn muttered.

Faye shrugged, "you never know."

San Francisco:
"Anything?" Chakotay questioned as Claire made her way over to him.

"Yeah, I got half of that beach in my shoes," she moaned. She took off one of her shoes.

"No, I meant..." Chakotay muttered.

"I know," Claire groaned. She emptied the sand from the shoe, then put it back on. "I didn't find anything."

"No need to worry," a familiar voice said. Chakotay and Claire glanced at the source. "I found it, I think."

"You think?" Chakotay said.

Jessie shrugged, "just wait and see, you won't believe it until you see it."

Meanwhile, the UK:
James, Tom and Lee were sitting at a table in Burger King, a rather empty one as well.

"I don't get it, something's blocking communication," Tom muttered. He took off his commbadge.

"It's probably the same thing that dragged us here," James said.

Lee glanced around at the only occupied table, his eyes lit up as he eyed a girl's bag. "Oh there's a Debenhams here?"

"Yes, I'm sure that they're the ones responsible," James said.

"Really," Lee said as he glanced back. "Then I'll be rather bold and check it out."

"You mean you'll be a little gay," James muttered.

"What, Debenhams is not gay," Lee grumbled.

"No, but the urge to shop for clothes right now is," James said.

Tom developed a smirk on his face, "I quite agree."

"Somebody must have brought us here though. I'm sure of it," James said.

Tom frowned, "how can you be so sure?"

"Well we're dealing with a guy from the twenty ninth century, right? We don't know what he's capable of," James replied.

Tom sighed, "fine, so he's probably sent us here to get us out of the way, and blocked our commbadges. If you're right, we should find an alternate means of communications."

"Where? The mobile store?" James muttered.

Tom's eyebrows both raised, "hmm, interesting. Tell me." He tried to do an English accent, "mob-eyel what?"

James rolled his eyes, "uh typical Americans, they always make us all sound like posh gits."

Tom shrugged, "oh come on, tell me."

"Doesn't matter, it's just technology that's outdated like everything else," James said. "Ok, what I suggested, sarcastically might I add, was a mob-ill phone store," he said.

"Don't mock me, I do the mocking," Tom muttered. "You British make it sound stupid, kinda like the word futile."

"Just remember where your language came from, get it right someday soon," James snapped. He shook it off, "just remember, as soon as we're in a quieter place I'll do what I usually do after you mock me."

Tom shrugged. "Fine. Mobile phone," he said, mobile was pronounced the way James did the second time. "Is that British for cell phone?"

"Great, we're getting somewhere. Next lets sort out the alphabet, the letter Z does not sound like the letter C, it rhymes with said," James said.

Tom frowned at him, "that's stupid, it's like a word, not a letter."

James shook his head, "oh forget it, we're getting nowhere."

"Not really, we could re-configure the cell. Braxton might think it's just a normal phone signal," Tom said.

"All right fine, I hope one of us replicated some money before leaving," James said.

Tom smiled as he pulled out a wallet, "I sure did."

"Just remember, you're in England so you can't say cell. And you can't insult the people who work in the store," James muttered.

Tom rolled his eyes, again he spoke in a posh English accent, "I will try."

"And please don't do that," James groaned as he covered his face with his hand. "I don't talk like that."

"Ok ok, sorry, I'd try Geordie but my main English sounds better," Tom said. He frowned, "wait, hasn't Lee been a little quiet?" He and James both glanced at Lee's seat, which was now empty.

"Oh great, he must have gone shopping after all," James said. "Oh and before I forget, you're near Newcastle so avoid insulting everybody."

"Uh why?" Tom frowned.

"Back in this century Newcastle people were known to be, how can I put it, a little rough," James said.

"We don't know that for sure," Tom said as he put his wallet back. He glanced at him, "but we do know people like you can come from it at the very least."

"I didn't come from Newcastle, I lived in a town further south from it," James said.

Tom turned a little pale, "ok, so there's rougher people than you then. No insults then."

Another table nearby got taken up by three men, Tom and James failed to notice. The men watched them for a short while. "Well?" one said quietly.

"Yes, that's him," another one replied.

The third one nodded, "when they're alone."

Tom and James got up off their chairs. "Well lets go do some, uh more manly shopping," Tom said with a smirk. He walked towards the exit.

"You do realise that girls love their means of communication, don't you?" James said as he followed him.

"All right, we'll go to a bar afterwards. Happy?" Tom muttered. They started heading back the way they came, making their way through the heaving crowds. Neither of them noticed the three men were not far behind them.

San Francisco:
Jessie stopped next to a table outside a café, Claire and Chakotay stopped behind her. "There's one bit of the signal," she said, pointing towards an old homeless man.

"What, him?" Claire questioned.

"Oh yeah, I followed him around for a bit to make sure. The tricorder seemed insistent it was him," Jessie replied.

Chakotay shrugged, "fine, lets talk to him shall we." He continued walking towards the direction of the homeless man, who had a shopping trolley with him. He began pushing it away. The girls glanced at each other before following them both.

Chakotay stayed about five metres behind the homeless guy with the trolley, as he headed down an alley way. The man turned the corner and went out of sight. Chakotay stopped to allow the girls to catch up with him.

"Great, we do look like nimphos," Claire said with a smirk, glancing at Jessie.

"Told you. In and out of alley's with the pervy older man," she said with a smirk.

Chakotay stopped and turned around with an insulted look on his face. "I'm not pervy, and second I doubt people would have noticed us going and coming from alleys."

"Just kidding," Claire said.

"Yeah," Jessie said, she pointed ahead of her, "we're losing our old man."

Chakotay shook his head as he turned back around. He turned the corner, the girls picked up speed to catch up with him. The homeless man stopped dead in his tracks, he turned around. "Who the hell are you?" He grabbed a hold of the trolley, "no, it's my stuff."

"What kind of loser would want that crap?" Jessie commented.

Chakotay sighed, stepping forward. "It's all right, we just want to ask you some questions."

"No no, no more questions!" the homeless man snapped. He abandoned his trolley as he started wandering aimlessly around the area. "No more surveys. Damn social workers coming around all the time," he muttered as he headed back over to them.

"For a homeless guy he sure is, you know fat," Jessie whispered to Chakotay. He shook his head.

The homeless man pointed a finger at them, "you, you've insulted me like that before."

"I doubt that, maybe a lookalike relative did," Jessie said.

The guy's eyes widened as he stepped closer to the team. "Oh, you're that abusive girl from Voyager," he snarled.

"Abusive, that's a first," Jessie said.

"This is all your fault," the homeless guy grumbled. Chakotay quickly took something out of his jacket, it looked like a commbadge. "What are you doing!"

"Captain Braxton," Chakotay said.

"I told you to turn off that deflector pulse but you wouldn't listen to me. Voyager, fools," the homeless guy snapped.

"What happened to you, does razors not exist in this century?" Jessie asked.

Chakotay ignored her, "the last time we saw you..."

Braxton snatched the commbadge back off him, "I was a younger man, confident in my mission." He marched off towards an old car with graffiti on it. The team slowly followed him. "You wouldn't listen to me, no you were too concerned about yourselves."

"Well you were trying to re-write five hundred years of history, that's if we actually got back," Claire commented.

"I was trying to save billions of lives. A chain reaction that started with Voyager!" Braxton snapped, slamming his fist on the roof of the car.

"How long have you been here?" Chakotay asked.

"Too long, thirty years too long," Braxton replied.

"We just got here though, why?" Jessie asked.

Braxton shrugged, "pure chance. When you knocked my navigation system off course, who knows where we would have ended up." He stuck his head through the window muttering to himself. "Who's been in here, who's took my pencils?"

Jessie and Claire glanced at each other, trying not to laugh. Chakotay raised an eyebrow as he made his way over to the car.

"Ugh, there's always something missing," Braxton muttered. "Greedy people!"

Chakotay leaned on the opposite window, "Captain, we want to help you. You'll have to give us more information though. You said that Voyager causes the explosion."

Braxton stared at him, "no. Yes, no." He pulled himself out of the car. "That's paradoxes you see. A leads to C, then C leads to A."

"Told you he was stupid," Jessie commented.

Braxton shook his head, "juvenile minds." He grabbed a piece of chalk from the car then walked over to the wall. "How can I make you understand, huh?" He drew an A on the wall, "A, there's an explosion in the twenty ninth century. A piece of Voyager's hull is found, I go back in time to destroy you."

"And the 'brilliantly stupid idea' award goes to," Jessie commented.

Braxton ignored her as he drew a B next to the A, "B, you try to stop me. You destabilise my equipment and I end up back in the late twentieth century."

Next he drew a C, "C, somebody in this century steals my ship and launches it. They go into my time, and once there they make one critical mistake. This takes us all the way back to A." He drew a line connecting C to A. "Boom, there's an explosion in the twenty ninth century. The cycle of causality is complete."

"How do you even know that your ship was even around, let alone cause it?" Claire asked.

"Ah, I've been spending thirty years trying to answer that very question," Braxton said. He picked up some old folded up light brown paper, he unfolded them and placed them on top of the trolley. "When the explosion first happened, my sensors picked up a whole variety of chronometric data."

Everyone gathered around. "The pulse was highly chaotic, at first I thought it was a warp core implosion. Then I find the debris from Voyager and my theory seemed to be confirmed, it was you."

"Yeah but how could we do that kind of damage, and what's your ship got to do with this?" Chakotay questioned.

"It's really obvious, if lame brain here hadn't of came back to zap us, we wouldn't have a problem," Jessie replied.

Braxton stared at her, "is she always so..."

"Yes," Chakotay and Claire replied in unison.

"Hey, you don't even know what he was going to say," Jessie grumbled.

"Anyway somebody here stole my timeship. Then it started to dawn on me, if my timeship was flown into the twenty ninth century without collaborating the temporal matrix correctly, it could cause the kind of explosion I witnessed," Braxton said.

"So it wasn't Voyager?" Claire questioned.

"No," Braxton shook his head. "No no, my ship causes the catastrophe."

"I have a question," Jessie said. Braxton folded his arms with a sigh. "No insults this time, promise. Starfleet have always been strict with rules and their prime directive, so why would they have developed time travel, and make ships designed just for it? Everyone knows that stuff only happens when some nameless idiot jumps right into something before actually thinking about it."

"She has a point," Chakotay muttered.

"I mean, they make a big deal out of cloaking devices and quadrant expanding in our century. Who's great idea was to have timeships?" Jessie said.

"That would take too long to get into," Braxton said.

"What I want to know is who was crafty enough to steal a timeship under it's pilot's nose," Claire said.

Braxton growled, "Silverman. Anthoney Silverman, he used to manage a computer company named Pirix."

He turned around to pick up an old newspaper, he opened it up and put it on top of the other lot of paper. "When I crash landed in 1975 I made an emergency beam out," Braxton said, pointing at a small picture of a dark haired man. "But he found my ship before I did. I've been following this corrupt little man ever since, tracking his movements. But he's become too powerful, I can't get close to him."

"Pirix, that sounds familiar," Chakotay muttered to himself.

"Of course you can't achieve anything in this wretched century or the last. Nobody here listens," Braxton grumbled. "Did you know that once they put me into a mental institution, and filled me with primitive pharmaceuticals."

"You didn't tell them about starships and time paradoxes did you," Jessie asked with a frown on her face.

Chakotay shook his head, "maybe we can find Silverman and your ship, and get us back to where we belong."

"Oh I wouldn't do that if I were you," Braxton said.

"Well it's better than asking people around here to help us," Jessie muttered.

"Haven't you been listening, A leads to B..." Braxton said.

"Yes we heard you. Why can't we at least try?" Chakotay asked.

"Because somehow you're involved in the disaster, that's why I found a piece of your hull in the disaster. You will be destroyed as well," Braxton replied.

"So, you don't know why that happens. Maybe we listened to you last time," Claire said.

Jessie rolled her eyes, "yeah, as if. Tell me Brax, did you steal that ship? Cos if you didn't, how old was the guy or girl who employed you to pilot a timeship? One, two?" Braxton burst out crying again.

Claire tried not to laugh, "is this what you were talking about?" Chakotay nodded his head with a smirk.

"I mean what kind of moron would tell everyone that he's from the future, and expect to be taken seriously. Come on, you'd think that the first thing they'd teach you is to blend in, un-noticed so you won't contaminate anything. God," Jessie muttered.

"Jessie, I think he's already learned his lesson," Chakotay calmly said.

"Yeah I'm sure, he could at least get a job. He stinks, and that look is so..." Jessie said. The sound of a police siren stopped her. Everyone glanced behind them and saw a police car pulling in. A guy climbed out of it.

"Careful, don't insult the cop, we don't have time to break you out of jail," Claire whispered. Jessie pulled a confused face.

"What are you talking about?" she asked calmly.

Chakotay sighed, "finally."

"Hey Captain," the cop said.

Braxton tried to stop sniffling, and wipe away the tears. He folded his arms.

"I heard you've been putting up signs everywhere again," the cop said.

"Me, oh no, I'd never do that," Braxton muttered.

"Well why don't you come down to the station and we'll talk about it," the cop said.

"Stay right where you are!" Braxton snapped. "Quasi-Cardassian totalitarians."

"What?" Jessie whispered to the others. Claire shrugged.

"Now calm down, we're not here to hurt you or anything. We just want to talk about those signs," the cop said.

"Tell them," Braxton said to the team. "Tell them I'm from the future." Chakotay sighed, he glanced at the two girls. "They came from the future too."

"Um right?" the cop said.

"Yes, they came from a starship," Braxton said.

Jessie rolled her eyes. "Told you, he's a thief or was promoted by a baby," she whispered.

"Tell them," Braxton said.

Claire looked worried, "um dad, I don't like it here."

Chakotay frowned at her, then glanced at Jessie who was trying not to laugh. "Yes daddy, this isn't the way to that cafe."

"Oh you're lost?" the cop questioned.

Braxton was now fuming, "traitors!" He ran off, pushing the cop out of the way as he ran out of the alleyway. The cop ran after him while the driver of the car put the car into reverse.

"Ok Claire maybe, but Jessie?" Chakotay muttered.

"Oh come on, I'm a twenty two year old who looks nineteen so I'm told, and you're forty odd. It works," Jessie said.

"It's better than the cops thinking you were some pimp," Claire said.

Chakotay groaned, "fine." He picked up the newspaper, "we've got a ship thief to find, and I'm not talking about Braxton."

Operations Officer Log Supplemental: Our four teams are still on the surface, and we've been unable to reach them. Right now our only advantage to the situation here on Voyager, is the subspace signatures on the surface.

The Bridge:
"Well?" Harry questioned, heading over to opps.

Damien just responded by rolling his eyes.

"Oh come on, we're all trapped here. I thought you were suppose to be on our side," Harry muttered.

"You said in your log that you're the Operations officer. I'm a feared moron celebrity leader," Damien said. He cringed, "I mean a feared evil leader, we're in the wrong positions."

Harry tried to keep a straight face, "this isn't your ship though. Just tell me..."

"No, there are no more subspace signatures. Something is obviously blocking the awayteam's commbadges," Damien said. He shook his head, "did I mention the word obviously."

"Yes you did," Harry replied.

"Good, moron," Damien muttered.

"I wanted you to try and find out the exact locations," Harry said.

"And then what, write a message, drop the PADD out of an airlock, and just hope it lands in the right place?" Damien said.

"Maybe a bit of paper would be safer, but harder to control," Ian said from the Engineering Station.

"Brilliant, it would burn up in the atmosphere," Damien said smugly, folding his arms.

"So would the PADD," Harry said in an even smugger tone of voice.

"Oh your god," Damien groaned with another roll of the eyes. "That suggestion was sarcastic. My point was that there's no point in us looking as the teams down there won't get the message."

"But if we find the exact co-ordinates of them we'll be able to do something. The teams were sent down to get those co-ordinates," Harry said.

Damien groaned, "fine, whatever. I'll humour you." He continued working at the station, he raised an eyebrow. "Huh."

"Huh? What's that?" Harry asked.

"There's only one in San Francisco. Do you even know how to work this thing?" Damien replied.

Harry frowned, "yes I do, they were all there before. Where are they now?"

"What do you know, I was right," Damien smugly said.

Harry started tapping his foot impatiently, "what?"

"Of course that's not a surprise," Damien said to himself with a smile.

"You know we could write the message on you and drop you out of the airlock," Harry said.

"I'd like to see you try, you pansy," Damien muttered. "About 50% of the signal that's not in San Francisco is now in England. 30% France. 20% Cyprus."

"There was only one on that ship, so what's going after the teams?" Harry questioned as he glanced around. "Are you sure that's just not their commbadges?"

"Very, unless you beamed more people to join Tom and co," Damien replied.

"Here's a theory, you know they could be pieces of the timeship like we originally thought," Danny said from the helm.

Harry sighed, "yes but how did the pieces get to the other places so quickly?"

"Well duh, we have transporters so you'd figure they'd have some in the twenty ninth century," Damien replied. "Nim rod."

"Nim rod? What's that?" Harry asked with wide eyes.

"Sorry Dan but why would the pieces follow the teams?" Ian asked.

"Perhaps it's just a coincidence. We know Tuvok's team went to Paris in France, but where about's in the UK is Tom's?" Harry said.

"Obviously a place that isn't written in big bold writing on the map of it's country," Damien muttered. "Paris would be right, London would be and the dumb ass transporter guy or girl would only be able to remember that from Geography. So there probably no where near there."

"That narrows it down," Danny muttered.

Ian tried to keep a straight face, "or the capitals of Scotland, Wales or Ireland, right Damien? Maybe Birmingham too."

"I wasn't going to be lame and name all of them, it was an example," Damien said, rolling his eyes again.

"Get the transporter officers to send their data to opps, we need to know where they are," Harry said. "If they are anywhere near the subspace signatures, we'll need to find a way to contact them as well."

"Well subspace number three is in the Nicosia city, but in the lively part. Subspace number two is in Paris," Damien said. "And subspace one is somewhere near Newcastle."

"Would that be in big bold writing too? I'm sure it would be," Ian said.

Harry shook his head, "just leave it Ian. We need a way to contact all of the teams and fast, it's our top priority."

"Whatever happened to localising the signals from here?" Damien asked.

"Three out of four teams are local, one maybe preoccupied though. Just get Tom's team's location," Harry replied. "If you're as smart as you think you are, you'll help us think of a way to contact them."

 

**** TO BE CONTINUED ****

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