Marill Re-Reads "The Slayers" Part 1

I needed this to be my first full re-read after months of severe anxiety like I needed severe anxiety. I probably do need a hole in the head, any offers?

I'll try to be brief before we dive in; The Slayers is unfortunately a very important Season Two entry, but despite that and its basic premise being half decent, I decided to go back into old habits to write it. Yes, it's a rip off, ala Holo Q and Disconnected. Guess which one this episode's rip off style is closer to.

Since I'm dreading this one, you probably already guessed it. It's time to dive into Holo Q 2; Pokémon Strikes Back. Okay that title's parodying the wrong movie, but the actual title just doesn't fit as well. Let's yawn do this.

Warning, there will likely be spoilers as I won't be able to resist blabbing about the setting and its villains.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Five large Liger ships flew into orbit of a large beautiful green planet. The light from the nearest sun shone upon it and reflected a beautiful green light onto the ships.

A pale yellow anomaly opened nearby the planet. Two small alien ships flew out of it, followed by what looked like two Species 8472 ships. The five Liger ships flew towards the newcomer ships. One 8472 ships fired a beam onto one of the Liger ships, destroying it easily. The two alien ships flew past the Liger convoy and flew into orbit of the planet.

Within only five minutes all the Liger ships had been destroyed. The 8472 ships flew into the planet's orbit. The other alien ships flew to the surface.

Well we're off to a good start. I'm already wanting to post something spoilery.

Spoilers for Season Four Finale; yes seriously. Keep scrolling if you haven't read; I did not remember the 8472 alliance happening so soon. Honestly, that's a bit embarrassing. It doesn't help that I don't have a clue why they need 8472 here, cos as far as I remember from this story, this is a run of a mill full scale planet attack. The Ligers having ships in orbit shouldn't be an obstacle for them.

Spoilers END

A man in his early forty's was sitting on a bed, with a five year old girl sitting next to him. The man was showing a large book to the girl.

"Do you think you'll ever find them, daddy?" the girl asked.

"Well it has been my life's work, so I hope so," the man replied.

Haha, oh boy. Okay. Guys, meet Ragha... or something like that. Another Kidz Trek refugee, only he didn't have a five year old daughter. He did have plenty of neices and nephews though, ahem.

He turned the page, it showed a picture of a strange creature. "This is Inti," the man said.

"It looks strong, just like you daddy," the girl said.

It doesn't take long for The Slayers to piss me off with its unneeded ripoffyness.

"Ragha, I have found the legendary cave, you have to come and see this," the man on the screen said.

YES I GOT THE SPELLING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY

"This looks like the Softmicron shrine," Ragha said as he walked towards a stone wall. He shone the torch at the wall. Strange symbols had been calved onto it. Ragha put his computer in front of the wall, and he worked on it. Pictures of the wall appeared on it as he worked.

:) Oh that didn't take long. I thought we wouldn't get a name till Part 2. Ah Softmicron. *cracks knuckles* The name's a constant regret for me, as I'm sure you'll understand if you know the series. If you don't, it's just a species of the day/episode, why else would I give it a stupid name?

hahaha oh, if only

Anyway it doesn't take a genius as to what the name is a parody of. Why I chose it for this species? I imagine if I wrote The Slayers in this decade they'd be Macapples. Ok no, maybe not. The simple, not very spoilery answer is I wanted a name that was technology oriented, AND extremely ruthless in its desire to be the one with the most power and influence. So yeah, I missed out on these guys being named the Eyefones. Shame.

"I wonder if we'll see any," the other man muttered.

"I'd doubt we'd be that lucky," Ragha said.

I was gonna ask why these guys are so interested in seeing these Softmicron, or why/how they even know of them at all, then I remember. This is the opening to Spell of the Unown. Carry on.

 Inside there were tiles, with the strange symbols on them. He picked up a few.

A few creatures that looked exactly like the symbols appeared, and they surrounded Ragha

Haha, it quite literally IS The Spell of the Unown. The creatures described are Unown. Spoilers for Season Three Episode 13+ Unless they're actually Softmicron who've been kipping in the box, posing as tiles. For once I'm rooting for them. That's so rude.

He felt a strange tingling sensation coming over him, then he disappeared in a flash of light.

The other man turned to look where Ragha had been, he saw nothing, but the open box and Ragha's computer.

Wow, how blind and I assume deaf is this guy? And very vague spoilery, why would the aliens do this? Any of it. I doubt the episode explains it, as I'm sure the Pokémon reason doesn't fit. Not that I remember. Who cares zzz

Anyways the blind guy tells Ragha's kid "hey sup, your dad ditched me again. At least he took his laptop with him," as he hides an obvious lump in his jacket. "Toodles!" he runs off, leaving a 5 year old alone in a mansion. You know what, I'm glad that guy disappeared. Second worst dad ever!

Later the kid for some reason has the box of alien tiles, the previous scene didn't mention them at all. Since they're Unown tiles, which are shaped like letters, she spells out mum, dad, me, cherry coke, slut, and then cries. This summons the creatures from earlier, and the girl thinks its these Softmicron dudes her dad's obsessed about and so grabs a chainsaw from under her pillow to get her revenge.

Ok sorry.... It's just better to write this than copy rip off rubbish.

"Softmicron. I'm gonna f$$$ you up!" the girl growled as she revved the kid size chainsaw.

I lied, I'm not sorry.

The floating letters shivvered. "Oh s$$$, time for plan B," one shaped like a S said.

A B shaped creature floated up to it and bopped it on its I assume head. "Yeah cos that joke never gets old."

"I'm serious dude," S stuttered before he was cut in half, "gah!"

"Oh come on, it took me ages to get promoted from D," C whined as the two bits of S floated near it.

All right, all right. Doing this I'm creating more work for myself. Lets see what's really going on. I guarantee it's nowhere near as interesting.

The rest of the tiles started to glow as well. The tiles turned into crystal, and the rest of the room shone brightly as the floor and the walls also turned to crystal.

The two men came into the room and they gaped in horror at what had happened to the room. Suddenly the doors slammed shut as crystal took over the door.

Talia heard something behind her. She turned to see what it was. A creature that looked like the Inti in the book appeared.

Yeah, I'll be talking about all this bull later. It annoys me greatly. Now you know why I was telling a much better story.

Talia remembered what her father said and she smiled.

"Daddy, is that you?" she asked.

yeah

yeah

I bet you miss chainsaw Talia now. God she was a badass

"If that is what you wish," Inti replied

Oh really? I wish for this storyline to go back to its bare basics and be original so everything it introduces doesn't have to be "retconned" later to avoid the s$$$ I ripped off here.

*waits*

All the servants ran out of the building. They watched as the building turned to crystal right before their eyes. They were forced to run when the ground around the building turned to crystal as well.

FU INTI, I ALWAYS LIKED SWEETCOON MORE ANYWAY

*cough*

Lets see what Voyager's up to, shall we. Hopefully something not annoying

Voyager
Holodeck One:
PokéBall were once again performing an

That was too much to ask for, wasn't it

I'll leave you in suspence as to what they were performing. Keyword here is were. I've removed that sucker, COS I CAN AND THERE WERE NO LYRICS AND S$$$

It's no use, cos Tom decides to pick a fight about their predictable song choices. God damn it Tom, the wound is still fresh

"Do you guys perform any of your own songs?" Tom asked.

"What's wrong with Aqua, jerk?" Morgan asked angrily.

I'm not ready to answer that yet Morgan. Tom though, high five??? Except for the Chain Reaction performance last episode, he's damn right. I have Pokémon soundtracks you know, and I definitely had one Steps album you lazy kids get off my 2001 lawn

"Nothing, it's just Aqua only had twenty four songs, you'll run out," Tom replied.

Oh ffs, I need to figure out how to handle this. OH I KNOW

"Nothing, it's just (censored) only had twenty four songs, you'll run out," Tom replied.

Flawless victory

Works even more knowing that again this was 2001, it's 2018 now and so that number's incorrect. mwahahahaha

Can we please change the subject. Chainsaw Talia and the talking alphabet had cheered me up, don't ruin it

"Plus most bands come up with their own songs," B'Elanna said.

"Correction, they probably had thirty six songs, but they just didn't release their third album," Morgan said.

pffthahahaha

I'm laughing at something else, don't mind me

"He's talking crap. Chain Reaction was a Steps song, well sorta. And She's A Barbie Girl was our song," Craig said.

OH YOU.

I'M MISSING SPELL OF THE UNOWN HERE, CAN WE PLEASE MOVE ON

"And another thing. That last performance was crap. Jessie looked half asleep, Craig was like a statue throughout the whole thing, Morgan's voice was too squeaky, and James was just a prat like usual," Tom said.

"Squeaky!" Morgan screeched.

Don't worry Morgan, you're no longer squeaky ;) Just a bit blurry (and no one gets the context, lawl, seriously move on from this scene)

Wow Tom, calling James a prat. That's creative

"I can't help it, if I was half sleep. If you didn't make us babysit Duncan all the time I'd be fine," Jessie pouted.

God, it's been a while

Jessie's Sin Points: +1

I wanted a change of subject and I get a sin slap in the face. I'm really disliking this episode so far.

"That's crap talk, B'Elanna. Everytime I come to pick up Duncan, she and James are always asleep on the sofa," Tom said as he folded his arms.

Jessie and James turned red and sulked.

Now we're talking! Tell us more

"Duncan must of tired them out then, and plus nobody can sleep well on a sofa, I should know," Morgan pointed out.

Um. okay? you go girl?

whut

"What did he say?" Morgan asked.

"I think he said, typical the cow always sticks up for those two parasites," B'Elanna said

Ok, I'm wondering if Tom's sensitive on this music subject too. He did bring it up. If so, I FEEL YA TOMMY. Then again, James hasn't done anything wrong here so... boo!

And the scene ends with Tom being chased by two Slayers and a Jessie. RIP Tom

The next morning
The Mess Hall:
Danny walked through the doors. She picked up a tray from the galley, she looked around. She spotted Jessie on her own at a table. Danny walked over to the table and she sat opposite Jessie.

Wait, I thought this scene took place in one of their quarters. Regardless, I'm prepared for an awkward conversation. It's bound to be better than the rest I've read so far.

Oh god, to be fair, The Spell of the Unown scenes weren't written half bad. Some detail went into it. And that's all the compliments it's getting.

"I'm not tired, I'm hungry," Danny replied. She looked at Jessie briefly and she looked back at her 'food'. "But you look tired, were you on the night shift too?" Danny asked.

"No, I went to bed early last night, which is strange," Jessie replied.

No it's not strange, I'm always tired

"Well I'm not as tired after waking up on the sofa, than I am now. You would think I'd sleep better in my own bed," Jessie replied as she took a drink of Cherry Coke.

Oh lordie, are we really doing this? I'm already appreciating the True Q's opening/sequel to this and I haven't even read it in years, just basing it on a memory. At least now I know why my memory has a Danny and Jessie chat in both Slayers and True Q. It wasn't one or the other. It's both.

"Everytime me and James babysit Duncan, we, er, I fall asleep on the sofa," Jessie replied.

Come on Danny, jump on this. Anyone can jump to conclusions, and Jessie even gave you a hesitant "we, er, I". shedoesn't.

When does Danny start seeing everything as rude? True Q if my memory serves, lol. bored

"Then that explains it. You can't sleep cos you're lonely, and you miss the company," Danny said.

"That doesn't make any sense, what so ever," Jessie said.

That's it. I'm going back to rebooting The Love Spell. At least the original Love Spell had a point to its mess. What has this got to do ANYTHING?

WE GET IT, JESSIE SLEEPS BETTER WITH JAMES ON A SOFA THAN ALONE IN BED. GEE IT'S A MYSTERY AS TO WHY GOSH

I MISS SOFTMICRON VERSUS TALIA WITH CHAINSAW GRUDGE MATCH. "YOU VANISHED MY DADDY, PREPARE TO DIE"

"It does. Correct me if I'm wrong, but when your mother adopted James when his father went, well nuts, you two had to share a bed for about, er, nine years," Danny said.

LOL

How did that detail slip my mind?

They shared a room when they were kids, yeah. maybe once a bed, prequel ep It's Your Duty referenced it. Good god. Man hating foster mum let her kid foster daughter share a bed with a boy? hahahaha

You're really really stretching this.

"Let me finish. For about eleven years you've been sleeping on your own, right?" Danny asked.

"Yeah, mostly," Jessie replied.

Oh ffs. In the olden day prequel plans, did Danny not know about the first relationship? Or are we just denially retconning it?

I got a better question. WHY DO WE GIVE A CRAP ABOUT JESSIE'S SLEEPING HABITS. It's just a ploy to hint... something about James/Jessie. They're already together, why are we playing this game? Have we forgotten already?

"Well then, my theory is that you miss his company," Danny said. She ate some more food. Jessie looked at her like she was waiting for Danny to say more.

"Is that it? I would of thought you'd have a disgusting remark," Jessie asked.

"I've ran out. I said em all when I found about him living in the same house as you when we were in Comprehensive school," Danny replied.

LIAR

I'VE GOT THE PREQUEL RECEIPTS TO PROVE IT

yeahyeah fine, that's cheating. this scene is so pointless

"Move in with James," Danny said. Jessie stared at her funny.

"I already live with him, idiot," Jessie said.

This is the point? We've only had one full episode of them together, and they spent half of it melting into mummy goo. A bit soon, no?

"Come on Jess, rumour has it that you two are seeing each other," Danny mumbled with her mouth full.

Oh so she does/did know about the first one? Okay. soconfused/bored

"Emma? How the hell does she... oh yeah, she was connected with Morgan in the movie and she knows," Jessie muttered.

please don't remind me

"It'll make the moving in with him thing a lot easier, Jess," Danny muttered.

"I don't care, you're suggesting moving in with him like fiancee's," Jessie said.

It's been like... I dunno, a month!

"Yeah but that's you and Ian. Plus Ian proposed to you, I somehow doubt that James would," Jessie said. Danny laughed.

"I could imagine it now. He'd probably stutter with the whole thing. The entire sentence will take five minutes for him to say, when it should take five seconds," Danny giggled.

"At least he wouldn't propose when we're both about to die in a battle with Borg," Jessie growled.

"Good thing too, he'd never get to finish," Danny giggled. Jessie groaned.

SERIOUSLY, ONE MONTH

RUN JAMES RUN

(I know, it's Danny not Jessie, but still)

and oh poor James, leave him alone Danny. And Jessie OHSNAP

The scene ends with a reminder about Jessie's twin and the forced engagement with him, just so you know James isn't a proposer. No, I dunno why this is here either. It's foreshadowing squat. TOO SOON

To make this episode even better, we cut to the Dellia to check on Lilly. but at least it should be plot related, small mercies

Lilly was still asleep in her bed when the door chimed. She didn't even stir. The door opened and a figure walked in, the light from the corridor shone into the room. Lilly pulled the cover over her head. The figure pulled the cover off her head, and he/she shook her arm.

Ok once again I'm giving The Slayers (similar) credit here. It's trying to describe stuff, set the scene. And I quite like the exchange here.

"Hey, Lil!" the figure yelled. Lilly woke up suddenly.

"What the hell are you doing here, James?" she exclaimed. Her brother just grinned.

"It's 0800, weren't you due on the bridge at 0730?" Johnstone asked.

"Crap, I've slept in," Lilly said and she sat up. Johnstone just laughed.

"It's not like you to sleep in," he said.

"Oh shut up, and can I have some privacy?" Lilly asked.

"Meh, I'm only your brother geez," Johnstone muttered in response,

Why?

1) We dunno who it is until Lilly speaks his name, and of course since it's Third of James and she'd not call him by their surname, we gotta have to wonder which James is this for all of 1 second. Then we get the "her brother" line after. It's like past me conspired to piss current me off.

2) THE TIMES ARE RIGHT. IT'S A MIRACLE

3) Just A Little Bit More: 1

4) Ok I'm mostly messing about here, but seriously I liked it. It's a simple scene with the two siblings acting like siblings, which has when attempted so far felt forced and unlike them. Kidz Trek Lilly and Dave/Lister are pretty much this.

Also Third of James isn't being that insufferable for once.

not yet anyway. The last line is probably more of a tease than a legitimate complaint

Plot starts to finally occur as big bro mentions a Liger colony nearby.

"Yeah, that used to be dumpy planet our Uncle used to take us to. You'll be surprised at what it's like now. It's like a holiday hot spot," Johnstone said. Lilly walked out, brushing her hair.

Yeah can I remind you "Johnstone". This is a different dimension. And if I recall correctly since FV messed with the time periods KT used and how big of a gap there's between humans, and again the dimensions malarky (thank god I've simplified this since for the reboot), it's been a few centuries. Of course it's bloody different, especially in a dimension that didn't have the Ligers until very recently......

Once more I'm confusing myself over the timeline and order of events revolving around the Ligers, Seventh Voyager, Damien, Sixes... The whole F9/Lilly's ship being in stasis, but her brother showing up in a modern/present day Dellia still baffles me. I hate past me.

aaaah forget it. Until I see otherwise this planet isn't Liger, it's a holiday spot because another species got to it before they did because Ligers aren't native to this dimension.

"And Uncle Ragha is on that planet," Johnstone replied.

"How come?" Lilly asked.

The fact that she's asking how a Liger character is on this planet backs me up. sshhhhh it's not that she's asking how he is also alive like her brother after so many centuries,shhhhh

"I thought you knew, he was lucky enough to get into a stasis unit on Venus," Johnstone replied.

DAMN IT THIRD... YOU RUINED MY ILLUSION

So, I assume this is the bulls$$$ excuse for Johnstone being around too? Are you telling me everyone on Venus took a nap? I get the F9 crew doing it but an entire planet, which I should remind or tell you is a colonised planet with a cloak that makes it still look Venusy to Earth. They were already hiding.

"I would of thought he'd be too drunk to get into one," Lilly muttered.

Oh yeah, I forgot Ragha was an alcoholic. That information's only funny when I tell you what his character was, other than that, in KT. I doubt he is here because of Talia, ahemspoilers.

"Ok, this is all hard to believe. S'Tarui a holiday hot spot, a sober Uncle Ragha. What's next? Emma becoming a pacifist, Craig becoming gay," Lilly muttered. Johnstone laughed.

"I don't know about this Craig, but I know what you said about Emma will never happen," Johnstone said as they both went into the turbolift.

"Well stranger things have happened. I never thought Jessie would go off makeup. I didn't think Morgan would go out with Craig even once. I didn't think Janeway & Chakotay would be drunk enough to get married," Lilly said.

"Well then, there's hope for Emma yet," Johnstone muttered.

"I hope she doesn't become a pacifist, everybody likes her the way she is," Lilly said. They both walked onto the Bridge.

So much, so little can be bothered but I do love complaining

Why is this planet being a hotspot so shocking? You haven't said anything about the Liger version for us to compare. Was it a Demon class, or a planet full of flowers that sing Justin Timberlake songs *shudders* ohgods.

We also don't know anything about Ragha other than he likes to leave his daughter alone in a mansion, the same daughter who confuses her dad for a big fire lion/dog thing. She's clearly not old enough for that s$$$

The Craig gay comment again, nice. Then the utter screech of the backpeddling over Emma. Still a bit nervous past me about pissing real people off?

"They're holding a main character, er I mean senior staff meeting. Janeway invited us," Carly replied.

Hush Carly, your days of being a MC died in the 90's

"Yeah, even these writers know when to stop the cast list from growing," Johnstone said.

"I find that hard to believe," Emma said.

OH SNAP

"Well, Togepi's Voyager series is worse. How many new characters has she got?" Lilly asked.

"About twenty," Emma replied.

EXCUSE ME

How is that still there?????????

FU PAST MARILL YOU BLOODY HYPOCRITE. HAVEN'T YOU LEARNED ANYTHING? DON'T SLAG OFF OTHER FRIEND'S WORK, OR RATHER DON'T THROW STONES YOU NINNY

*deleted*

Meeting time, and btw we're halfway through part 1. As per FV tradition, part 2 will very likely be twice the size *checks* ok not twice, but definitely bigger.

Anyways the meeting barely gets started when Faye interrupts with a distress call.

"Okay, that was a quick meeting," Morgan muttered. Everyone stood up and they all headed out. Tom, Harry, Tuvok, Kathryn, Chakotay, Morgan, Jessie, James & Craig assumed their usual positions. Everyone else just stood around somewhere.

So what are Morgan, James and Craig's usual positions? Remind me. James hasn't been chained to Jessie's station for about ten episodes.

In: "This is the Dellia Z4 calling all ships in the area. S'Tarui has been attacked by 4 alien ships, a strange anomaly has overtaken the planet. We need assistance."

OHNOES, SO MUCH FOR THE BEACH HOLIDAY

And yes, the Ligers don't have any other ships. Just Dellia Z's (and F9), it's easy to keep track of, honest

"Put the planet on screen," Kathryn commanded.

The viewscreen changed view, it showed a large purple sphere, and the two 8472 ships surrounding it. An anomaly had opened nearby, and more 8472 ships were coming out of it.

And suddenly everyone goes on a toilet break. totally unrelated

"What the hell is that?" Chakotay asked.

"It's a Games Sphere," Morgan replied. Everyone but Tani looked at her with confused expressions on their faces.

Why confused, the Borg have cubes and spheres, why can't the Games do the same? It's just those darn trendy Tolg trying to break the mould.

"You'll be detected if you are not cloaked. We'll put a cloak beam onto you," the Liger on the ship said.

Wow, something useful for once.

"A what?" Kathryn asked as the viewscreen turned back to show the Games Sphere.

Ok it's a wee bit bigger and a different shape, but the clue is sorta in the name and you've been in a couple of cubes

Sorry, I'll stop needlessly picking. Besides it's Morgan's time to shine!

Morgan: OH BOY, EXPOSITION *DROOLS*

"It's like a Game Cube, but much worse. They cover entire planets. They automatically tap into one person's dreams and fantasies, and change the planet into that person's fantasy. The only way to get rid of these kind of games is to either get the person out of the fantasy, or defeat them in a Games Match of their choice," Morgan replied.

Oh darn, so much for a globalised Pokémon tournament.

(I wouldn't rule that out yet)

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE

"That's not it. It's nearly impossible to get the person or user out of their own fantasy's. It's like leaving a perfect life. Of course the user can make themselves as strong as they want, so beating them at any Games Match is extremely difficult," Tani said.

HEY TANI, GET YOUR OWN GIMMICK. EXPOSITIONING IS MORGAN'S THING

Tani: *oogles James*

SOMETHING ELSE YOU PERVERT

BUT WAIT AGAIN, THERE'S STILL MORE AND ITS THE KICKER to my face cos this episode wasn't meant to rip off the plot of Pokémon 3. But anyway, lets have Morgan explain

"Yeah, only chosen slayers have a chance at winning the game. And there's only two in existence," Morgan said.

Oh shucks

"Chosen slayers, isn't that the same as natural born ones?" Tom asked.

Wait, was Tom around for any of these conversations (shush you in the back whispering prequels, HUSH)

Last time on Marill Re-Reads "Resistance"

"I have no idea, no human would be able to break these bones just by punching them," the Doctor replied.

"I knew it, James isn't human," Tom said.

intruige!

"The only humans who could do this kind of damage are natural born or Chosen Games Slayers," Morgan muttered.

"What the hell is a Games Slayer?" Tom asked.

"Oh for heaven's sake, I'm not going through that again," Morgan moaned.

And now the conclusion

Yes, and he's heard of Chosens too but didn't get any explanation AND didn't really act like he didn't know anything. Though it's reminiscent of James' earlier "WTF IS A GAMES SLAYER" in Season One's edits to get around prequel retcons.

"No. Chosen Slayers are much stronger

Ok but what if the user wishes themselves to be stronger than a Chosen? HUH? WELL, I'M WAITING

. Also if they're experienced enough they can manipulate the Game anyway they can," Morgan replied.

I dunno if this is the episode to get into this tidbit. Probably

"This is beginning to sound like the Matrix," Craig muttered.

"Well it's a similar concept, the Game itself uses the planet as the battlefield," Tani said.

HEY, no. NO. I designed the sphere idea. FU

"So the only way to win this game is to find the chosen slayers?" Kathryn asked.

"Yeah, but it's like looking for a certain piece of dust in an assembly hall," Tani replied.

ok?

"It's a tiny bit easier than that. According to my Games Watcher, the Chosen Slayers are born within the same species, yet a lot more powerful than their own race," Morgan said.

YEAH THAT HELPS MORGAN

AND I KINDA GATHERED THAT STRONGER PART FROM WHAT YOU SAID EARLIER

"If we send all of our slayers into the Game, they might all have a chance at winning," Kathryn said.

OH JOY, WE'RE CALLING POKEMON TRAINERS SLAYERS AGAIN

KILLME

"But mum, the chosen slayers would have a difficult time winning this game. A run of a mill Slayer will have no chance," Morgan said.

Tom: but my Chikorita's totally bitching, it knows Razor Leaf

"But you and James are Natural Born Ones, that might help things," Kathryn said.

I mentioned my dislike of the name Trainee Slayers, and now I'm gonna whinge about the Natural[Born One]s (please hurry up and call them Naturals).

First you have the volunteers. People who wanna help out in Games and stuff. Sure some could specialise in Pokémon battles, and others could do physical training for the Hunts. Of course they don't have a natural ability for it, but they can train to do the job. They'll eventually not need to train, so always calling them Trainee Slayers is bad and you should feel bad. Calling them Slayers is also a stretch, and a bit confusing when Marill references them. Which brings me to...

The Natural born ones etc... I think all that's been revealed so far is that these kind are abnormaly strong.

Then we get to the Chosens. Only two "in existence." Stronger than the Naturals and can meddle with the Games, or something... and yeah it probably isn't too soon to moan about that earlier manipulate comment. Not at the mo though.

And lets not get into the The Love Spell's convoluted Kes speech to Morgan and her telepathy, lets just not. yet.

So yeah, I have no issue at all with the Chosens as the name fits. They've been chosen over the other Naturals to be best of the best. I've typed my preference for calling volunteers simply volunteers, not Slayers. This way you don't have to separate the Naturals from the pack by calling them Naturally gifted at birth kind, they can just be called Slayers.

If this lore wasn't all over the series, I'd change the Slayer hierachy from this;

Chosen Slayers > Natural Born Slayers > Trainee Slayers/Pokémon trainers lol

Chosen Slayers > Slayers > Volunteer fighters or players *shrug* or just Volunteers

Then we lose all this confusion. It's simple. People play the games to help out, but there are strong people out there call Slayers that have the gift to do it. Then there are the granddaddies of them all, the Chosen Two, stronger than the rest.

Isn't that easier than all the twaddle earlier?

And while we're still on the subject... I'll repeat the quote

"But you and James are Natural Born Ones, that might help things," Kathryn said.

Shady Watcher in Games Resistance told them this totally new info, despite Morgan knowing perfectly well that they were at least before catching Game Cube amnesia.

So?

He earlier said that he sensed no Slayers at all. This guy is shady as f$$$, why take his word for it? No one on the bridge humours them being Chosen? They have no other Slayers to compare to, so they can't have any idea either way

justsayingnotspoiling, just pointing out bad writing

"Yeah, but who says it'll be easy. This is a two parter after all," Morgan said.

"Which'll probably end up longer than the movie," Tom sniggered. A brick appeared out of nowhere and hit Tom on the head.

hurrrrrr

he's probably right, but the question is, will it beat its score? probablynot

"Are you sure you can transport us into the Game?" Tani asked.

"Yeah," Morgan replied.

"If that is the case, can we beam back out if something happens?" James asked.

"Conveniently for the plot, no," Morgan replied. She looked at James and she groaned. "Why the hell have you got Duncan with you?" she asked.

PLOT CONVENIENCE, TIMES 2

Come on Morgan, explaining why you can't beam back should be easy to do without fourth walling. If you could transport people out, then the sphere loses a lot of its impact

Which reminds me, did they ever say what the consequences are for leaving a sphere around? No one asked how it wins. hmmmmmmmmmm

Anyway lets return to the other plot convenience. Bryan, Duncan's not really brother, was supposed to collect him from daddy after his 5 second babysitting session, or probably while Tom was levelling up his Chikorita to 14 or 16 so it can evolve before the mission.

But of course you can't count on kids who look like adults

"For god's sake, just leave Duncan here," Morgan said angrily.

James put Duncan on the ground nearby the door. "Now, you just stay here," he said. Duncan just giggled at him.

LOL

this kid's five months old

get your a-game together Dunc, Bryan was saying full sentences after two episodes. pfft, I'm sure you can handle a simple command.

"Do you really think he'll do as you say. Tom can't even control him," Harry said. To his surprise Duncan sat where he was told to. "Bloody hell, how did you do that?" Harry asked.

He's five months old. Can he even crawl?

James of course claims ignorance and they leave.

And I forgot to take notes on who the team of ahem Slayers are for this mission. Obviously you got the real kind, Morgan and James. Lets see who else.

Morgan, Tani, James, Jessie, Craig, Triah, Faye & Harry dematerialised in the middle of a field. Not far away was the mansion, that had been turned into crystal.

Wtf Faye? HA

She's essentially me, so whut? I suppose I do like battling Pokémon

As you've probably tried to erase from your memory, Harry and Triah were the Holo Q teammembers gifted with a frog and some evolved from a halfegg bird thing. Craig had an Onix because he's Brock.

Yeah Jessie was also a Holo Q'er but I'd have expected her to be in the Game if she wasn't anyway. Then again, she's been very very tame this season.

Then we have Tani, who I remember sucking at simple Pokémon matches in Games Resistance. This'll end well.

"I don't know. It might be the Game adjusting the planet to suit the user's fantasies," Morgan replied.

"So the user likes crystal," Harry muttered.

Now see, this changing the planet explanation suits the original idea for the sphere nicely. Probably the only saving grace, but the rest will be straight rip off of the movie.

The awayteam heard what sounded like the transporter. They all turned around to see Duncan.

I remembered this of course but I must.............

HOW

"Duncan, I told you to stay where you were put," James said.

FIVE. MONTHS. OLD!!!!!!!!

I know, I know. This is Fifth Voyager. Kids age rapidly but clearly I was trying to keep Duncan a baby longer than poor Bryan. He doesn't talk, only laughs and I don't think has been seen crawling. He's the most realistic baby in the series so far. If we forget the wall punching in Precise, ahem. So yeah, this is jarring.

BUT WHO CARES, THE MOVIE NEEDS ANOTHER KID FOR THE RIP OFF PLOT

kinda... you'll see

I do find it funny though that at first you think Duncan's only listening to James cos duh he knows he's his dad, and won't listen to Tom cos he isn't. But nope, wrong. He pretty much followed him. Which I guess is more cute than funny.

Jessie picked Duncan up.

"Well he's just like his father, he can't stay still for a second," she said, she briefly looked James' way.

*melts*

"Yup, he's just like Tom," Triah said. Jessie laughed quietly, and she looked back at James.

OH.... TRIAH, ACCIDENTAL SNAP

and oh Harry's dumb to have missed this little exchange and not get suspicious over it. Though I have a funny feeling revolving around this that I'll be eating my words

Inti and Talia were sitting on Talia's bed watching a computer screen. It showed the awayteam.

"Daddy, I want a mummy," Talia said. Inti stood up.

"If that is what you wish," Inti said.

Um, that giant dog thing can fit on a kid's bed???

Is this the detail I'm taking from this?

Other than "oh here comes the ripoff plot"

"Can he walk yet?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, do you really think Tom's son would not know how to walk," Triah said.

He said walk, not talk Triah

"Good point. Anyway I was thinking we could get a few of our Game Creatures out to walk with Duncan, and guard him when we encounter sprites," Harry said.

FU HARRY

So here we go, we're in Pokémon World now as the Frog, Chikorita (damn it Tom, you had one job. Why is it not evolved yet!!!), and pure water Marill, none of that fairy bulls4$$, joins the team.

"Yeah, I was a Slayer on Betazed for two years," Faye said.

Of course, she's the one with the Marill.

Jessie put Duncan down. Morgan, Faye and Harry told the three Creatures what to do, and they all looked at Duncan briefly then nodded.

oh lordie, I just remembered the "twist" in part 2 and I'm sniggering. movingon, totally unrelated

"Wait a second, what's that?" James asked. Everyone looked at what he was looking at. They all saw Inti coming towards it.

towards what?

"I have no idea," Morgan replied. Inti stopped in front of them all. It looked around and he kept his stare on Jessie.

"You will do," he said. Suddenly he fired a strange beam from his mouth at the away team. They all dived out of the way to escape the blast, a cloud of smoke surrounded everybody. Inti walked up to Jessie. He looked at her, then his eyes turned red. He picked up Jessie without any resistance from her.

Oh god, here we go. I wonder if the next part's been edited. If not, lets remember what gems this season has given us and wonder how we got here

The smoke cleared, and everyone saw what was happening. James stood up and he threw out two Creature Balls as far as he could. Victreebell and Arbok came out. They saw what was going on, and they attacked Inti. It fired another blast at the two, it easily knocked them unconscious, then it ran off. James recalled Victreebell and Arbok, and he ran after Inti. Morgan followed, Craig followed as well.

yeah it's not edited, that much anyway

well

at least he ran for Inti himself eventually. Probably would've done better if he did that first. Not a good idea to set Arbok and especially Victreebell onto an Entei... Inti... Yeah why he's the only Poké with a fake name, best not to ask that one. heh. I have a good idea why. awkward

moving on

Inti noticed the three running after them. He fired another mouth beam, and he ran faster. Morgan eventually managed to catch up with James, and she held him back. Craig caught up and he helped her.

hahaha oh Craig. Good thing you were there, cheers!!!!!2144

"You can't follow that thing, it could kill you!" Morgan yelled.

"Morgan, let me go!" James screamed back at her. The others caught up.

Remember when James got away from Morgan doing this exact same thing roughly two episodes ago? In a similar circumstance too? Yep. Obviously Craig was the Chosen all along

"Just don't do anything stupid," Morgan said. She let go of him, so did Craig.

And then James runs off.

Ok he doesn't, maybe. but dunno what'd stop him

"Mummy?" Talia said quietly. Jessie woke up and she looked at Talia. "Mummy, it's me Talia, don't you remember?" Talia asked. Jessie picked Talia up and she put her on her knee. Talia hugged her. "I'm so glad you're back," Talia said and she started crying. Inti smiled at them both. "Thank you, daddy," Talia said quietly.

How old's this kid again? And since this is a virtual environment, how come Inti didn't spring up her "real" mum? HUH, YEAH THE SLAYERS, EXPLAIN THAT

"Inti, it's a legendary Games Creature. The Game must of created it as part of the user's fantasy," Morgan said.

This is all Ragha's fault you know. If he had only read Talia an actual kids book like James and the Giant Peach, none of this would've happened.

James: Yeah no thanks!

"But who is the user, and where is he or she?" Craig asked. Morgan worked on the computer and a picture of Talia came up.

"A little girl called Talia Nystral, she's the daughter of Ragha Nystral. He recently disappeared when he was researching the Softmicron," Morgan said.

So erm, the computer in City Hall knew this? Haha try pulling another one. I'm gonna assume the Game is ok with them knowing this info since it probably thinks the Game's not winnable

Also the surname backs up my theory that Ragha's erm job title in FV is different to Kidz Trek. He'd be a Liger/Johnstone otherwise.

"A kid's fantasy world can't be a good thing," Harry said.

"Yeah, it will be even more difficult to get her out of her fantasy world, than it would be to get an adult out of theirs," Tani said.

Not just any kid. A very accomodating/dumb kid who is ok with a giant dog with a weird mask as a face and a random woman as her parents.

"It doesn't matter, she can do what ever she wants as long as she's the user," Morgan said.

"Do you have any idea why this kid would want Jessie?" James asked.

Yes The Slayers, why???? If I remember Spell of the Unown, the kid's mum died a while back, so I assume Inti could create any woman, claim she's Talia's mum and she'd buy it. Going to the trouble to kidnap someone and brainwash them, nyeh. He only does it cos Entei can't do that?? can he, I do remember him making Pokémon out of thin "air"/crystal.

Also the fact he kidnaps Jessie of all people, in front of Morgan and James, tickles me. I mean true, they didn't stop it but way to motivate the Slayers to win the Game, Inti. Good job.

Meanwhile more Pokemon 3 Spell of the Unown happens

The bulldozer thing smashed through the crystal fields, and it continued towards the mansion.

Meanwhile in the mansion:
Talia was watching what was happening on the computer screen.

"Go away, leave us alone!" she screamed angrily. She stamped her foot on the ground in rage.

Back outside:
The crystal rebuilt itself, it hit the bulldozer and crushed it.

RIP bulldozer driver :(

"Guys, we're getting a message from the mansion," Tani said. Everyone came back over to the computer and looked on as Tani opened up the message. Talia was on the screen.

"Go away. Me, my mummy and daddy want to be alone. So just leave us alone!" she yelled.

I do prefer the chainsaw weilder Talia, but who wouldn't?

"But I thought you said that her dad had disappeared," James said.

"I did, maybe she wished that her parents were there, so it happened," Morgan said.

Well gee, so that is a possibility and yet, still kidnapped Jessie. Oh Inti, you're just bored and hoping to pick a fight, aren't you?

"I think we should go to that mansion," James said.

"That's crazy. We can't get past the crystal wave that's turning everything into crystal," Craig said.

How DO they get by this erm... crystal wave? I haven't been paying attention at all. The bulldozer was fine until Talia had a tantrum.

"How will we die? We can't die in a Game," Tani asked.

"This is no ordinary Game. Even if we escape the crystal wave, we'll starve to death. The Sphere is blocking out the sun. If this planet has replicators they will run out of power eventually," Morgan replied.

It would've been nice if that important detail was "shown" in a description of the planet. You know like, it's dark or the sky is the same colour as the sphere. At least we know the consequences of a Sphere, win it or everyone pretty much dies slowly. nice

"Well I'm going to that mansion to get Jessie back, I'll go on my own if I have to," James said.

but..but this wave thingy *shrug*

"Why are you acting so brave all of a sudden?" Harry asked.

Harry has been asleep since episode 2 hasn't he? Most of the cast have forgotten the JAMES IS A PANSY rubbish now.

but then there's this 

"Nothing can be more scary than losing Jessie," James replied. Tani just groaned and she rolled her eyes.

Everyone should groan at that line

I'm sure Craig used a similar line actually............. *checks*

"Nothing can be more scary than Morgan disappearing, I'll be fine," Craig said.

WOAH

Damn it James, what the hell. You're better than this

"You're not going on your own anyway. I'm coming with, Jessie's my friend, plus we all came here to fight this game anyway," Morgan said.

"You're not leaving me behind," Craig said.

So the team split up. Harry wants to check out the gorry bulldozer body but can't admit it, and Triah never really does anything so why break that habit. Tani probaby sulks in a corner.

I'm assuming, since Triah says we'll stay behind after Faye volunteers too, so...

Meanwhile I feel like I'm forgetting something

In: "Tom, can you explain how Duncan is in the Game Sphere?"

Oh yeah, Duncan's there. I assume he stays with Triah and co. This isn't Season One or Mirror Universes

"Well he must be clever to activate the transporter. Plus why the transporter room?" Bryan asked.

Clever? Sure. Also learned to not only walk/crawl, but climb onto a station much bigger than him.

If this isn't a clue he's James' son, I dunno what is. This kid's an off screen badass

Anyway that's the cliffhanger, only we already know Duncan went into the Game sooooo...

What did Inti do to Jessie?

Well this is episode 12, one season ago a flying chicken thing picked her up and randomly took her for a ride. It's obviously a "yearly" tradition.

How will Morgan, James, Faye & Craig get to the mansion?

Hang on, let me get my dvd and get back to you

How will the awayteam win the game?

I'm sure Talia's waiting for the perfect moment to chainsaw that stupid mask off Inti's face.

The answers to all of these questions will be revealed next time on Fifth Voyager.

Well apart from the one we already know, I BLOODY HOPE SO

>> Page 2 time >>

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Counter Results So Far:

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