Marill Re-Reads "The Curse of Voyager"

Years ago Marill liked The Mummy 1999, so naturally she had to steal it for a Kidz Trek plot. At the time it didn't have a sequel, so she decided to come up with one. Here enter The Curse of Verinia, the episode/chapter of Kidz Trek: The Voyager Home. Sometime after Marill "cleverly" decided to novelise her The Mummy ripoffs in a series of books that'd follow the finished novella Tragedy and some other I can't recall that had been started. The first titled The Corpse and its sequel The Curse of Voyager.

Enough of the third person talk, I got as far as halfway on The Corpse before I gave up on the series and moved on eventually to Fifth Voyager. The Curse of was unofficially, unknown to me should've been called The Curse of Unfinished Book Series's. Corpse and Curse were drafted into Season Two's lineup. I'm not sure when Kiss of Death reared its head.

Sometime in 2001 I got my much wanted sequel, The Mummy Returns. By this time I was hoping to subsitute my worst English coursework with a short story, and I had chosen The Corpse. Only The Corpse was the Fifth Voyager version, so the work I had already done for it had to be done again from scratch. I'm not sure when I did this because my memory's fuzzy, but it couldn't have been any later than May 2001, which would mean some of it was written in the Season One era.

I didn't finish it, I wasn't even close. The Corpse was dumped for a Kidz Trek: The Future chapter made up on the fly and yet I somehow still passed? I've always assumed it was inspite of that, or I would've gotten a B or more if I hadn't done that.

Nowadays, or rather August 2001 days, The Corpse became The Resurrection, was finished and released as a movie-fic event. The Mummy Returns sequel meanwhile was also drafted in, previously called The Reincarnation so the pair would fit together. Kiss of Death and The Curse of Voyager were not changed to suit the naming pattern.

Unlike Resurrection, Curse of Voyager remained true to its roots. Except for the cursing its series to never be fini... *looks at reboot section* ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, shhhhh. No no FV is technically finished, so yeah it didn't curse FV too. The episode followed the main plot and some of the "twists" of the Kidz Trek version, and since I cannot remember the Voyager version other than when it's based and who the characters involved, I'll assume that was the same too.

Unfortunately Curse was stuck in a very weird season that liked to waste its time on really weird shipping and characters acting badly. The Curse of Voyager would've been a regular one parter without that, but now it's a two parter disguised as a one, at the time being the longest episode released (I say second, as I count The Resurrection as an episode). Only slightly shorter than the "movie". Yep. Still and yet still a one parter.

So now it's time to read through it and hope it isn't as bad as some of the last episodes I've read. Though I have spotted a pattern of "1 good then 1 bad" from Kiss of Death onwards, so if that's the case I'm due a good one. Lets do this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope you guys are(n't) keeping track of all my character memes, cos I've made a handy list for newbies I have a feeling is going to be super handy in this re-read. Trust me.

Janeway/Chakotay: Worst parents eva
Harry: GORRY BODIES
Tuvok: TUVOK IS AWESOME, LEAVE HIM ALONE
Lena (previously known as Morgan): The Child Abusing Edgelord, previously known as The Expositioning Super Sue.
James: The absolutely drop dead beautiful Garbage Taker, Offscreeninator or the Immortal ladykiller - for once not literally (unless this is a Season One cast off, then he's What Button Is This Divvy)
Craig: No names yet (I'm open to any suggestions), but his main character description is huffy jealous, overcompensating example of toxic masculinity, aka the perver of a 15/16 now 17 year old girl who thankfully isn't really a teenaged/future version of a kid he babysat.
Jessie: The Denial I WAS LOVE SPELLED Queen, previously known as holy s$$$ Jessie is angry, every man for themselves!!! and MY MAKEUP
Tom:
The Doctor: blackmails people into harvesting their organs in the guise of organ transplants. Collects flesh eating bugs which I'm sure is unrelated.
Annika (previously known as Seven): Dies a lot for luls but currently awol, but since this episode is (spoilers) the one that tries to or does kill everyone, I expect a cameo.
Tani: creepy stalker and sexual harrasser of James
Danny:

And everyone else...........

AND finally SPOILERS for this episode

Iinan: Loves himself, and why wouldn't he, he looks like James. Generic bad guy. Likes to say things are strong.
Unu: Crazy girlfriend of Iinan made to seem like the sidekick but it is actually more in depth than Iinan by a massive stretch with her backstory and characterisation. See above. Doesn't like heavy things.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Doctor walked into his office, he then walked into the lab. After pressing some buttons on the station, the Doctor walked up to the wall console then opened a small door. He took out a small grey container. The Doctor then closed the door and he walked back into the main part of Sickbay, without even taking his eyes off the container. Lena strode in as the Doctor put the container onto the console he stopped at.

"I hope you'll give me more information today, my little friend," the Doctor said. Lena burst out laughing.

Oh god, is this what really happened with James' lung? I knew it. Called it.

But who cares about that, Lena wants the Doc to dye her hair. Yeah I dunno either

"It's meant to look 'all over the place', and having an unnatural hair colour is, how can I put it? Yeah, it stands out from the crowd, gets you noticed," Lena said.

"With purple dye in your hair it would be no surprise that everyone noticed you," the Doctor muttered.

Lena mentions her actress gave her the idea and I'm honestly at a loss. Meh. Purple sounds nice. I've tried it, it doesn't last. Doc asks why she wants to change

"It's kinda Morgan's hair," Lena replied.

"Ohno, not this again," the Doctor muttered.

Oh yeah, not this annoying your life is a lie, you're not meant to exist, malarky again. Sheesh, get out of here you big whiner

"Why do you say Morgan like the name belongs to somebody else?" the Doctor asked.

"In a way it does, Doccy. Mum told me I should make a fresh start," Lena replied.

Why does this feel like it really was written after True Q's last scene, when apparently it wasn't, while Halloween was like some bad Season One knock off?

"If I started some counselling sessions for any member of the crew would you come?" the Doctor asked.

"Even if I had a problem I wouldn't come to you. No offense Doc, but I think you're the one who needs help, not me. I wasn't the one who was talking to a container," Lena replied.

OH GOD, HE'S EXPANDING HIS ORGAN STEALING EMPIRE, NO ONE FALL FOR IT

Meanwhile all is right in the world, James and Craig have I assume made up and are chatting as if Resurrection never happened.

"Somehow, I don't think that'll work," James muttered.

"Why's that? Explain it to me Genius, you know all the answers," Craig said as he folded his arms across his chest.

Well you see, first you got to wait for the cameraman to focus on someone else. It doesn't work if the camera is on you or the guy you want to hit, or the mystery is gone.

"Firstly it's the oldest trick in the book, she'll not fall for it. Secondly, if Lena liked you in the way that you like her, then she would of told either Jessie or me, or maybe if she was still friends with Tani she would tell her," James said.

oh. I like my interpretation better.

Still, not sure if he has a point here. Some people might tell their friends about their crush, but Lena is not like most/some people. Plus she and Jessie sometimes hang out, you know how denialy Jessie is, Lena may have learned that from her.

"That's what you think, Lena's a very secretive person. Also most girls hide their crushes from even their own friends. Did Jessie ever tell you if she had a crush on anybody?" Craig asked.

I SAID IT BETTER CRAIG but thank you for proving my point

and for making it super awkward with that question, bwahahahaha

"Er... I can't remember," James replied.

pfftsnigger

"She hasn't has she, that proves my point," Craig said.

This guy is fearless. Lucky for him the example doesn't involve a third party

"Fine, do what you want. Don't listen to me, you've never had a girlfriend in your life yet you seem to know how to get one," James said.

OH SNAP SON

JAMES THE GARBAGE TAKER IS BACK, HURRAY

Someone get that Craig to Sickbay, burn heals stat, before he gets all bitter and defensive

"Oh yeah. You can talk. That Simon guy in Resistance told me that you went out with Jessie years ago. That's quite sad since you've only had one girlfriend in your miserable twenty eight years of existence," Craig said.

oops too late

And hohohoho, wow Craig. Your defense is OH YEAH, WELL YOU HAD 1 MORE GIRLFRIEND THAN MY ZERO TOTAL, YOU SADDO. Oh you crack me up, you

Why would he ask James for advice on how to date Lena if he thinks he doesn't have enough experience? Clearly he did before he got burned, haha

"One's better than none," James muttered. Craig stood up and he put his hands on his hips. He immediately put one down

Hahaha, I'm enjoying this so far. It won't last, I remember how the rest of this storyline goes.

I know some might think I should be telling James off here and defending Craig, mainly cos James' "haha you dateless wonder" is ooc and very toxic, but while I agree on the latter, the former nope. Looks like Craig asked for James' opinion on his pick up lines, or from what I get from the dialogue, his pick up trick to get Lena to date him. Yep. James told him it was tired and he's wasting his time, plus Lena is impulsive enough to have told someone by now if she liked him. Craig gets all defensive, and smugly tries to tell him his opinion is rubbish as if he's an expert. James reminds him he's the opposite of one, epic'lly to shut him down, making Craig get all huffpuff you saddo with your score of 1 woman, as if it's something to be ashamed of. Only then James says that "one better than none" line, after Craig pretty much tantrums the whole scene. Call me biased, you maybe right even though I do like Craig's development so :P, but I'm on James' side still. He's perfectly in character. FOR ONCE

"I'm not going to take this abuse from you. I'm leaving," Craig said angrily and he stormed off. On the way out he passed Tom and Harry.

They both walked over to James.

"Okay, what did you say?" Tom asked.

I obviously called him a divvy, so he's ran away to cry it off I imagine

"I was just telling him the truth," James replied.

"Yeah, the truth nearly always hurts more than lies," Harry said.

Um, why does this feel like a foreshadow? Double checking Slayers to see if he did ever find something out. Nah I dont think so and not doing that to myself

"You're right. Let me demonstrate. You're a stupid girly haired freak, who couldn't get off with a girl even if they were hypnotised," Tom said.

Harry started crying and he ran towards the door.

See, now that's toxic. Poor Harry

"Er, Harry, I was insulting James, not you," Tom said. Harry came back, his face was bright red.

"Oh yeah, of course," he stuttered.

James stood up. "Strange, I thought he was talking about himself," he said, and he walked towards the door.

Okay, now that's something I'd argue about James saying. Still, I'm okay with it, these days he mirrors the insults back as the person who uses it must think it's insulting and will not appreciate it thrown back at them. For example Reboot Test of Time has the two teens calling James a gay boy or something, and he responds with you wish.

"Hey, I can't get off with a girl coz I'm married, you dimwit!" Tom yelled.

As always, works like a charm

"That's probably a good point, but you do need help. You still haven't recovered from the 'True Q' episode," Kathryn said.

"I'm fine, I don't need help. If I want to dye my hair purple then I should be allowed too, it doesn't mean I'm nuts," Lena said.

I told you to memorise that character list, didn't I. Here comes the worst parents ever example. Ohnoes you haven't recovered from that life changing reveal 2 episodes ago, get to therapy you stupid girl, oh and purple hair *shreak*

"It's not just that. I mean Tani told me that you said to her that she fell out with Morgan, not you. You say your old name like if it was somebody else's name," Kathryn said.

Yeah, there's a good reason or hundred for that Janeway. Try listening to her and not brushing her off to therapy. And jesus, this implies Lena tried to make up with Tani as a way to cope. That's a little heartbreaking

"Lena, do you want my help or not?" Kathryn asked.

"No, not really," Lena replied.

Kathryn groaned again. "Well at least let me explain what I meant by making a fresh start."

Lena folded her arms across her chest. "Fine, knock yourself out," she said.

Oh lordie, this is going to be painful. Lets see what Janeway/2001 Marill thinks is a fresh start after the revelation that your memories are fake, they are fabricated/meshed with your daughter's, oh yeah you have a daughter out of nowhere she's not really your past self, and ps you weren't supposed to exist.

"I meant forget about what happened, do new things, get yourself a boyfriend, make up with Tani, give up alcohol," Kathryn said.

OHMYword

1) F$$$ OFF

2) Doesn't dying your hair count as new things? Gotta take it slow

3) Oh yeah, that's just what the girl with buckets of trauma who hasn't figured out who she is yet needs. A relationship.

4) SHE TRIED TO DO THAT YOU $%£^&$%&*$^ £%&^$^£&$^&

5) The only semi good one, but even then I'd suggest cutting back a little, not cold turkey

"I've done, or tried to do most of those anyway," Lena muttered.

"I know, my point is you've been trying too hard, and you've been confusing people as you do it," Kathryn said.

Um excuse me, back peddling doesn't actually make you go backwards you know, you just stop and fall off. At least I do

"Listen, if I never mention the name Morgan again, and get a bloody boyfriend, will that shut you up?" Lena asked.

Ohno Lena, if I were you, I'd go with the new things or alcohol one

Craig's Quarters:
Craig opened his door to see Lena.

SERIOUSLY, GIVE UP THE BOOZE, CHERRY COKE'S BETTER

Poor James is going to get a lot of smug told you so's from Craig, ain't he? ugh, dunno if I can stand it

"Can I just use your replicator, I need a few things, and I haven't got any rations left," Lena asked.

"Sure," Craig replied. He stepped to the side to let Lena in. The door closed swiftly after her. She then walked over to his replicator.

"I was thinking, do you want to go to the Holodeck tonight, I know this really cool program," Lena asked.

Or you could try not being abusive towards Kiara. That's a new thing

"Lisa asked me out," Craig replied.

WHO?

Okay I know the answer but, bwahhahahahaha, what was that previous scene about if Craig already has dinner plans with Lisa? If he's telling the truth, wtf. If he's lying then, uh, why? She's already there, asking him out. What more does he wa...don't answer that.

"A girl asked you out!" she yelled.

"Yeah, don't act so surprised. You're a girl and you just asked me out before," Craig said.

"I thought you liked me better than her anyway. It's just a little game I found in the ship's database," Lena said.

Wow, learn those defensive strategies from Jessie did ya? Oh god, I just remembered something else about this storyline and any sympathy I have for Lena, even just the smidge, runs off towards James so he'll take it out. iknownotfunny

"Sorry Lena, I've been rejected by you and other girls too many times. This is one of the very rare times where a girl actually asks me out, I'm not missing out," Craig said.

Oh erm super awkward

"If she was the ugliest, and the most evil girl in the universe would you still be willing to go out with her?" Lena asked.

This is Craig. Duh, of course he would. and that's at least half shallow Lena, yikes

"I dunno, anyway Lisa's far from that description," Craig replied.

"Fine, do what the hell you want. I just wanted a friend to come with me to check out this program. But if you've got more important things to do I understand. I'll ask someone who's most likely to say yes," Lena said.

I dunno if you're keeping count, but that's the third time someone's say do what you want.

And lol, after the previous scene we know what Lena's intentions were here, but cue the defensive I just wanted to hang out with a friend, and when that doesn't work, she brings her winning card to the table. This oughta be good

"Tani isn't my friend anymore. Besides you said it yourself, I was asking you out, so I may as well find another guy to go with. So I'll ask James," Lena said and she stormed out. She thought, "that should get him to Jealous Level Fifteen."

Craig thought, "Crap! I couldn't of picked a worse time."

Oh this is so much to unpack, it's so bloody delicious and bad for me

"Yeah, it sounds a little suspicious," Lena muttered.

"Suspicious, why's that?" James asked in a nervous tone of voice.

Oh James, don't choose that side. Both are bad, but you don't wanna be on the fakes a date to make a girl jealous even after she asks him out side. Still far more bitter than the only dating someone to make her mum happy one.

"I don't know what you're talking about, I only found out a few seconds ago," James said.

"She's right, you act like you know something," Jessie said.

"Maybe Lisa told him that she was going to stand him up," Lena said.

I wouldn't ask Lena to run my detective agency, sheesh. It's clear that James knows something because he talked to Craig, goodlord

"Fine, I know one thing, Lisa's not going to stand him up," James said.

"And why do you think that?" Jessie asked.

"Er, I have a hutch," James replied.

Jessie:
*the face of someone who's about to burn their own quarters down*

Oh, I so remember going through this one years ago during my earlier reboots which was just fixing supposables and exclaimed abuse. I saw this, fixed it, read ahead, scrolled back and fixed it back while sniggering. I figured this was Season Two, way too early for my "they walked in on a hideous site" self mocking my own typos jokes.

Lena gave him a puzzled look. She quickly had a look at James' back, Jessie gave her a strange glare.

Yeah Jessie, I'd glare too. Wtf James is thinking hiding rabbits on his back. That's one sure fine way to end up in the doghouse and cut off for a month

and giggle at Lena misunderstanding as well, pffthaha

"Not hunch, a hutch," James said.

"A rabbit hutch? What's that got to do with Lisa and Craig?" Lena asked.

*struggles to keep straight face in public place*

"When somebody has a hutch about something they have this strange feeling that, you know, something is definitely going to happen, even though there's no evidence that it will happen," James said.

"That's a stupid word," Lena muttered.

"To be honest, I was pretty sure it was hunch," Jessie said.

bwahahaha, finally thanks Jessie. I love it though. James gets the wrong word, Lena also gets the word wrong thinking a hutch=hump, then wonders about rabbits, Jessie rethinks her friends and boyfriend choices, James doesn't notice his mistake and digs deeper, until Jessie tosses him a rope to hang himself with. For once, the dialogue is pretty good. Digging it

"I know it's hard to believe, Lena, but Craig may have a girlfriend," James said.

"Heh, yeah right. Most of the entire main cast will be killed off in this episode, and Harry and Evil C have a fight over Emma," Lena muttered.

Welp, we don't need to read it now. Thanks. What's next, Cause and Effect. Okay, I guess.

"I don't know what you're problem is Lena, it's not like you fancy him," James said.

"That's a funny one," Lena muttered.

yes haha, it's no I got a hutch that I got a hutch on my back, someone make sure the rabbit doesn't get out of the hunch, but it'll do

"Lena loves Craig, Lena loves Craig," Jessie chanted.

Jessie's Sin Points: +1

Hypocrite Jessie to Sickbay please

"Tom is over there you know, I can easily let the truth about Duncan slip out," Lena said.

"You're no fun," Jessie muttered.

How many episodes do I have to wait until they take this Duncan thing seriously? Three? Alrighty *grins and bears*

She headed towards the turbolift. The doors opened, and Kathryn stepped out. Jessie went into the turbolift. Lena watched as Kathryn headed straight into her Ready Room.

"Damn, I think you and Jess were right," Lena muttered.

No they can't both be right. A hunch is a feeling, a hutch is somewhere rabbits sleep.

"About Craig, it's the only reason I can think of, other than I'm obsessed," Lena replied.

"Maybe you are obsessed," James said.

um WTF

Is she... bwahahahahahaha

Okay, lets take this as it is. I'm intruiged that she waits for Jessie to sod off before talking about this. I mean yeah James and Lena tended to bond, badly, over their teasing the other over their ships, but I didn't see her opening up to him about this so easily. I guess like she said earlier, she has no one else :(

"So, can you do me a big favour?" Lena asked.

"Depends, what is it?" James replied.

"Spy on Craig's 'date'," Lena said.

Um hahahaha. I suppose James was born for this moment. He's the stealth king

"No way, I'm not doing it. You fancy him, you do it," James said.

"I'll look stupid," Lena moaned.

"So will I," James said.

Now don't get me wrong, the dialogue's improved and I'm liking it, but this is a long episode which is already 1/4 of the way through. Is there an actual curse or are we already looking at it, the curse of the shipping love triangles?

"You should be used to it by now," Lena said.

"For that, I'm not helping you," James said.

and yet still *snigger* If I hadn't spoilered something and the age difference (AU dimension or otherwise), then I'd ship these two over Lena/Craig. Sorry. Better chemistry, suck it, you know it. Love them, always will... except when they're ooc and Lena's being child abusy of course.

"If you're going to be there, why do I have to be there?" James asked.

"I just said, it'll make us look less stupid," Lena replied.

"Why do I have to do it, though?" James asked.

"Because you're gullible," Lena replied.

"No, I'm not," James muttered.

"Really, whatever you say. Just help me. Friends help each other," Lena said.

"Fine, but if the unthinkable happens then don't blame me when I lose my dinner," James said.

"I told you, you were gullible.

Ha, I saw it coming and yet you still got played, chump

and wait, what is the unthinkable, how far are they going to go on their spying here? o_0

 "I told you, you were gullible. Besides, it's Lisa, what's the worse that could happen. It's not like she's going to kiss him or something," Lena said.

"You don't know Lisa well, do you?" James asked.

Uhoh, got my Sexist Count on standby.

"She's one of those quiet sluts. She looks shy and innocent, but believe me, she's not," James replied.

Sexist Crap Count: 1

UM

Be glad your OOC count is gone James, cos JESUS CHRIST.

Yeah, Curse you got him right with his earlier dialogue, but you're going too far. dial it back

 "But it's Craig," Lena said.

"Yeah, I know he's not the most popular guy on the ship, but in Lisa's point of view, he's just another customer of hers," James said.

Sexist Crap Count: 11

GOOD LORD, NOW SHE'S AN ACTUAL LITERAL "SLUT" NOW. GEE JAMES, MAYBE YOU DESERVE TO HAVE A HUTCH ON YOUR BACK WITH RABBITS INSIDE, THEN JESSIE WON'T GO NEAR YOU. ENJOY YOUR LONELY NIGHTS SUCKER

"Er, Craig wouldn't do anything though," Lena muttered.

"Really? This is his first real date, his first real girlfriend... well I can't say it might be his first real kiss, cos he's already had a one off with a girl called Morgan, whoever she is," James said.

"You're really asking for a slap," Lena growled.

DO IT

god damn, I'm still laughing though. The episode is or was trying to get him right, but ffs, those Lisa lines are just so, eew, no.

"I don't remember asking for a slap," James said in a confused tone of voice.

"Don't be a dope," Lena muttered.

"I take it you're jealous of this Morgan person then," James said. Lena passed him an icy deathglare, he didn't notice. "Whatever you do, don't get into a fight with her, she's a Slayer, so she'll probably kick the crap out of you," James said. At this point he notices the deathglare.

Remove the Lisa's easy/slut/prostitute lines, and the weird present tense shift, and I'll be more than happy with this scene as is without a rebooty edit. Sigh

"Speaking of kicking the crap out of, you're really p****ng me off," Lena said, almost like a growl.

"I was only joking, you said it yourself, you're not Morgan," James said.

"Yeah, but what you don't know is that I'm getting that kinda crap off everybody else, not to mention the slut remarks. The last thing I want is a friend p****ng me off like that," Lena said.

Oh, it's no longer funny. Damn :(

Kathryn emerged from her Ready Room, she stopped and watched Lena and James.

"All right, I'll stop," James said.

atta boy, now there is another word you need to add onto that. begins with s, and not the usual s as we've abused that enough

and lol, Janeway skunk eye, gonna enjoy this

"Can't we find a better place to meet?" James asked.

"There's nothing wrong with my meeting place," Lena growled.

"Oh yes there is," Kathryn said. Lena jumped slightly and she turned around.

Well you did tell her to get a boyfriend Janeway. This is on you. bwahahahhahahaha

"Out of all the lads on this ship, you chose him," Kathryn said and she folded her arms.

EPIC foreshadowing, and such a step up from Halloween, can't stop smirking

"I told her to maybe find a boyfriend, as one of the things she could do to make a fresh start," Kathryn said.

"Mum, don't be stupid," Lena said.

"So why are you meeting him outside your quarters?" Kathryn asked.

Yeah telling the truth isn't going to help. "We're gonna spy on Craig's date, mum."
Janeway:

 "That makes me feel a lot better," Kathryn said as Tom walked over, with a smirk on his face.

"Oh so you can get off with girls," Tom said sarcastically.

EEEW LENA'S 17, JAMES ISN'T! HE'S CLOSER TO 30 THAN 20

BAD TOM, BAD

AND HE SAYS THIS IN FRONT OF JANEWAY AND LIVES. WTF

"Oh for god's sake, I'll tell you why we're meeting," Lena said.

"Do you really want to do that?" James asked.

"We're just going to plan our next prank on the Doc, so don't tell anyone, or it'll spoil it," Lena said.

OH, clever girl. That's believable ish

"Ooh, can I help?" Tom asked.

"No!" Lena and James said in unison.

Ok that didn't last long, this isn't suspicious at all

"Captain, a Borg ship is right in front of us," he said.

"Tom, how come you didn't see it?" Chakotay asked.

Well, I was more interested in the 17 year old and 28 year old hooking up possibility. Who wouldn't be

"Yep, getting ready for Plan Z," Chakotay said.

"Plan Z, we never use it, to be honest I've never heard of it," Kathryn said.

Does it involve tricorders, oh oh, please be sending more janeway posters onboard. wait tho, Borg, after Thrown Key. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"I say we beam Annika over there," Chakotay said.

"Then we blow the ship up!" Lena yelled.

I knew it, I bloody knew it. Hellyeahs

"I've just detected bugs over there, millions of them. There's a good chance that they're killer bugs," Chakotay said.

Just A Little Bit More: 1

"Eew, bugs," Tom said quietly, and he shuddered.

lolforeshadowing

"Since when is their a point to anything in Fifth Voyager?" Chakotay asked.

"Now that would be a good point, if we were not in Fifth Voyager," Kathryn replied.

"Now I'm confused," Harry muttered.

ME TOO HARRY

"Captain, the Commander was correct. The ship is infested with bugs. If my sensors are working, they are Sbaracs," Tuvok said.

"All right, Chakotay, it's your idea, so you can do the honours," Kathryn said. Chakotay nodded and he sat back in his chair. He fiddled with the console at his right side.

Ah finally, I can bring an old counter out of retirement then. *blows off dust*

Annika suddenly dematerialised in a dark corridor. She looked around, with a confused expression on her face.

"What the....?" she muttered.

She was interrupted by that very familiar sound of Sbaracs running. Then she saw a swarm of them heading toward her. She screamed and she tried to run away in the opposite direction. The Sbaracs caught up and they had their lunch.

One Sbarac thought, "eew, there's not much meat on this thing."

Only a few Sbaracs ate, most ran off.

Annika Dies Count: 1

YES, FINALLY, NOW I CAN LIVE MY LIFE AGAIN

"From the inside. It would seem that the circuitry and everything has been eaten away," Harry replied.

"So the Sbaracs probably ate all the drones, but what ate the technology?" Chakotay asked.

"Sbaracs," Lena replied.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't the Sbaracs just eat flesh?" Tom asked.

"They do, but I heard that Sbaracs absorb electricity from wires and circuits," Lena replied.

Um, and how do you know this, I don't remember this detail in Resurrection or kiss of death. I'll check you know, don't think I won't "Morgan"

"I hated them when I was a kid. When I was five a bug crawled up into my bed, and I woke up with it on my face. I got over the fear, until I saw those damn Sbaracs in 'Kiss of Death'," Tom replied.

lolforeshadowingagain

"Captain, I'm detecting a Human lifesign," Harry said.

"But there were no lifesigns before," Kathryn said.

"Some sort of energy field keeps blocking his lifesigns. We won't be able to beam him onto the ship," Harry said.

I know your game Harry, you just wanna go over there and take pictures of the gorry corpses

"Tom, Lena I want you to go with the Doctor & Kiara," Chakotay said.

AGAIN I ASK, WHY DON'T I HAVE A J/C ARE THE WORST PARENTS EVER COUNTER

because I'm too lazy to go back through all the re-reads and check, duh

Lena's an ex borg fine, but she's 17. I can kinda guess why she's going despite there being better options, but KIARA WTF

"Why me?" Tom asked in a nervous voice.

"I suppose to toughen you up," James replied.

um, I beg your pardon

"My dad used to beat me when I was three, to try and toughen me up. So I suppose going on a ship with bugs on it, is pretty mild compared to that," James replied.

I said, I beg your pardon

Do we really need this occasional reminder so people don't forget in *counts* 14 episodes time. Ok it's a long way away but why is this relevant here, in this one, True Q had a reminder only 2 episodes ago anyway.

And seriously, WHAT? If that did actually make any kind of sense, it doesn't, it is still really warped of you to say this. Go to your corner

"They're flesh eating bugs, you dimwit! I, personally would prefer to be beaten off my dad at three than be eaten by those bugs," Tom said.

To be honest, me too, but that could be my arachnophobia talking

James really, stop being ooc randomly. This still isn't Season One

James tapped his commbadge. "Neelix, you said you wanted some chicken, there's one on the Bridge. And it's a big one too."

DON'T MAKE ME BRING BACK THE OOC COUNTER MISTER

Okay seriously, I said earlier I was fine with his "I thought you were talking about yourself" comeback earlier because Tom pretty much tried to insult him badly and so give him the rubber/glue snark. That's fine, that's James. But what the f$$$ is this. Tom didn't do anything, unless this is payback for the "get off with" line he pointed toward Lena. James saying that he's been picked to face his fears and toughen him up, comparing it to his dad's abuse of him, then calling him a chicken cos he won't, it'd be like me going up to somebody, grabbing them and smooching them, all while grabbing their butt. This is more ooc than his crap in Halloween, and it's only equally as annoying because the episode has proved to be trying with him while Halloween was spitting on his development. gah

"Okay, where's the chicken?" he asked. Harry pointed his finger at James.

"Hey! If you knew what I was going to do tonight you wouldn't be calling me a chicken," James pouted.

Well can't say you didn't deserve that you divvy

"Stop being a coward, you're making James look like James Bond," Lena said.

Tani: drools at the thought

Can we please drop the James is a coward angle. I don't care if he had that chicken joke earlier.

Lena, Kiara & the Doctor walked over to the corpse. Lena shuddered like she usually did. The corpse's skin had melted away.

"Oh, now who's a coward," Tom muttered.

"I'm not scared, I just shudder when I see dead people," Lena said.

Ok so yeah, daddy dearest sent his 5 year old who looks 15, and 17 year old with a death phobia (and likely a Borg one too) to a Borg ship infested with flesh eating buys, with the guy who is afraid of them and another who'd prefer to collect them.

Meanwhile Harry is very upset at being left out

"Yeah right, did they have a pet Sbarac that got loose from it's leash?" Lena said sarcastically.

"Well you explain how the Sbaracs got aboard the ship?" the Doctor said.

"Maybe the ship stopped by Thairo. These, er people, have had most of their implants taken out. They must of been the resistance, so they might of beamed down to the surface. And one idiot might of beamed a few aboard to study them," Lena said.

Hmmmmm, intruige. Stand down the Janeway posters men, it's not necessary

"Strange, there's now three lifesigns. Human, Ktarian, and Bajoran," the Doctor replied.

I KNEW IT, SESKA AND NAOMI WERE WORKING TOGETHER TO DESTROY VOYAGER, AND THEY HAVE RESURRECTED THAT DUDE WHO NEELIX KILLED. WE'RE DOOMED, DOOMED I SAY

Anyway the two senior officers team up, leaving the two kids who hate each other alone. This'll end well

 Lena and Kiara stopped when reached three closed regeneration units.

"This is where the lifesigns are coming from. I think these are Borg Stasis units but most of the components are really strange," Lena said.

She moved her hand towards the unit but a Borg forcefield forced her hand back. "That's strange, I thought I would of been able to get my hand through," Lena said.

Though they're getting along, so what do I know. these kids are more professional than the actual crew. what a twist

"Borg forcefields are generated by the drones. The three ex drones in the stasis units will power the forcefield," Lena replied.

Huh, what an interesting made up fact.

"We can't beam them all at once with that forcefield around the stasis units. Beaming one out will weaken the forcefield, we'll be able to beam the others out then," Lena said.

"Then do it then," Kiara said.

"You don't tell me what to do," Lena growled.

so much for getting along

Tom pointed at the panel. The Doctor looked inside the panel. "Tom, it's dead," he said. He pulled out his medical tricorder and he scanned it. "It had an overdose of electricity, the power in the node was too intense," the Doctor said.

Tom sighed and he walked back towards the panel.

"I think I should take it back onto the ship to study it," the Doctor said.

I think you should shove it up your butt doc, as long as you remember to take it out before you beam back. Sheesh, haven't you seen any episodes like this before?

In: "We have the Human in Sickbay."

Lena and Kiara heard consoles beeping over the commlink.

In: "We're picking up trans-warp signatures, we're beaming you out of there."

Sorry Seska and Naomi. Not today, mwahahahahahaha

Anyway plot over, lets get back to love triangles and spy games

"How long are they going out?" James asked.

"I dunno, if I knew I would just spy on them at the beginning and end of the date, not the whole thing," Lena replied as she put more blonde streaks in her hair, in front of the mirror.

Oh yeah, I almost quoted the bit about Janeway commenting that she had streaks in her hair, and her remarking that she didn't want to wait for her purple dye job. So erm, yeah. Here, why is she trying so badly to stand out. Unless it's invisible dye, this is the last thing you should do

"You know I do have more better things to do than spy on Craig scoring," James said.

Meanwhile Lena continues to chuck colours in her hair. Yawn, who cares

"I think someone's following us," Lisa replied. Craig looked behind him and he turned back around.

"I don't see anyone," Craig said.

DAMN IT LENA, WHAT DID I TELL YOU

"Well rumour has it that Lena and James were planning on spying on us," Lisa said.

"That's good isn't it," Craig said quietly as they both stopped outside Craig's quarters.

"Yeah, I suppose. But I have a plan," Lisa said.

What's this I smell, a twist?

Hmmmmm? I had forgotten this little nugget. Lets continue

 Lena and James looked around the corner. Lena stepped back, but James didn't.

"James!" Lena whispered angrily, and she pulled him back. "Do you want them to see you," Lena whispered.

Bitch please, James has been sneaking up on people unawares and off screening fools since before you were born. he knows what he's doing

"Yeah, that'll be get her to jealous level five," Lisa said.

"What did she say?" Lena asked quietly.

"I dunno," James muttered.

Why on earth is Lisa saying similar lines to Lena earlier?

"We can't get any closer, unless we want to be seen," James said.

Speak for Lena, dear. You could probably walts right up to them, eavesdrop and as long as you don't announce your presence, they won't know a god damn thing and neither will we

Lena and James stared in shock as Lisa kissed Craig briefly. She then walked away. Craig went into his quarters.

Then again don't listen to me, or you would've been far too close to the action. nm

"This drone seems to have full Borg implants. This is strange because the drones on the ship have had most of their implants removed. That's why we thought that the ship was a resistance ship," the Doctor said.

Um what, I'm confused

"You're on the Federation Starship Voyager, I'm Captain Janeway," Kathryn said.

"We demand that you return this drone to the Borg," the drone said.

"We can't, you're vessel is badly damaged, and we can't risk our ship to return you to the Borg," Chakotay said.

"Release this drone, this vessel is in danger," the drone said.

QUICK, SHOW HIM THE POSTER, THE QUEEN MIGHT STILL BE WATCHING

"You boarded our ship, you've infected this ship. Let me go! Please let me go!" the drone exclaimed.

God damn it Doctor, I warned you. whatachump

"Meh, he just panicked. It's common for a drone to panic once released from the collective. Usually they believe that something is going to happen to them," the Doctor said.

Just gonna post this infamous and very appropriate video game quote in here: MEH, MEH, MEH

Wow, so moving

"When the new Borg Queen took over, the Borg developed new and better ways to destroy severed drones because of the resistance. I believe that they drive them to insanity so that the drone would destroy itself," the Doctor said.

o_0 *suspicious*

"Er... interruption please?" the Doctor muttered.

"Ok, that's strange," Lena muttered. Everyone looked her way.

"What is it?" the Doctor asked.

Someone really oughta have a root around his database. this guy's a little off, and maybe search under his desk for all the looted organs

"I think, no I am sensing another presence," Lena muttered. Kiara rolled her eyes.

"What do you mean?" Kathryn asked.

"It feels like there's somebody else in the room," Lena replied.

James: 'sup

Everyone: GAH

Lena: hey, why weren't you that sneaky earlier?

James: *already gone*

Everyone: WTF??

Lena, Emma, Tani, Evil C and Jessie were sitting at one of the large tables in the centre of the room.

Why? Lena and Tani aren't friends anymore. Jessie wouldn't want to sit with Tani. Actually, who out of that lot would? Are Emma and Jessie/Lena friends?

"I wonder why nobody believes me. It's not that ridiculous, I am telepathic after all," Lena said.

"Yeah, isn't Harry cute," Emma muttered as she stared at Harry.

pfftsnigger

I'm (not)sorry but apart from a few ickle issues, I'm enjoying Curse so far.

"Emma, is that all you ever think about?" Jessie asked.

"No, I think Tom and Chakotay are cute too," Emma replied. Everyone rolled their eyes in unison.

He saw the drone there, standing next to Kiara. He had less implants than he did earlier.

"We have determined what probably happened on the Borg ship," Kiara said. The drone turned to face Chakotay.

Um. I know the actual answer, which is related to Curse's past history, but why the hell is Kiara around the separated Borg drone who in the last scene got violent? I suppose Chakotay walks in and doesn't act surprised cos he told her to interrogate him, or else no supper.

Anyway EXPOSITION PARAGRAPH TIME

Lena: NOOOO WAIT FOR ME

"Well, our ship was heading for the planet you know as Thairo. A Maji fleet stopped us when we were in orbit. We managed to negotiate with them, so we could get supplies. A storm pulled the small sphere down, it crashed near a city called Naptwo. The sphere managed to get repaired and we left orbit a day later. A few hours later in the middle of transwarp, our ship started having technical problems. Also most of our people were disappearing by the minute," the drone said.

WHAT KINDA "SUPPLIES" DOES THAIRO HAVE THAT MAKES EVERYONE LOSE ALL REASON AND BARGE INTO THE MAJI TERRITORY, RISKING UNLEASHING A CURSE. REALLY???

But other than that, yeah ok. Convenient but ok.

"The Sbaracs weren't the only ones that boarded our ship. Drones kept acting differently. We found out what was wrong, a spirit had come aboard and were taking over crewmembers," the drone said.

Ah possession episodes are da best, right up there with one off romance episodes.

What? I've done that joke before? aaaw

Wait, haven't we done the ghosts possess people story before? Several times infact *cough* and will continue to do so. omgspoilers

"Just in curiosity, I checked out the database that has information on Thairo's history. Supposedly one of the passages in the Book of the Living casts this curse which makes the victims' bodies disintegrate, but leave their soul's intact," Kiara said.

When did they do that? Was it before or after the Thairo visit, and filed under The Doctor's Exposition Notes?

This series really struggles to replace Seven/Annika as thee original know-it-all.

"The passage that Lena read out in 'The Resurrection' was the wrong one. 

Well well, what a leap. Why? Two words. Spirits and Disconnected. Both starring dead people possessing people to do their bidding. I mean sure the bug thing is new but still

Anyway I interrupted, lets get back to Kiara stealing another trait of Lena's, which I'm sure will help with her identity crisis

The one she was suppose to read was the one that destroys both the body's and souls of the victims. She read out the one I mentioned," Kiara replied.

"Judging by the way the possessed crewmembers were acting, I think they were possessed by either this Iinan or Unu I heard about," the drone said.

Oh well, if drones start going around hitting on each other with the same "you're strong" chat up line, you gotta assume the worst.

Chakotay tapped his commbadge. "Chakotay to Bridge, Red Alert," he said. Over the intercom, they could hear the Red Alert siren coming on.

DRAMATIC IMAGINARY TRAILER MOMENT

I think it's more worrying that Sickbay's Red Alert klaxon isn't working, personally.

In: "I'll contact the Dellia, they maybe able to help."

"Good idea, Chakotay out," Chakotay said.

Janeway: Voyager to the Dellia Sues. Halp, our Sue mucked up, she's not been so super sue since her plot twist the other week. Get your sue selves over here.

Dellia crew: *dons superhero costumes as the blue alert lights flash*

"There's no way that the Sbaracs could of gotten in the sphere, even if it had crashed. The curse actually brings them into existence. Probably as soon as Iinan and or Unu had come aboard the ship the Sbaracs appeared," Kiara said.

HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS? SHE'S POSSESSED, GET HER

"You don't think that because Iinan and Unu are onboard, the Sbaracs will be too," Chakotay said.

Tom: welp, I'm going on vacation to the Sue Fleet. Later suckers

"They would probably appear on the most vital deck, first. I must warn you though. Iinan and Unu started possessing people as soon as we left orbit of the planet," the drone said.

Objection! Why? Maybe once or twice at first, until they realised there was nothing for them there. It's not like the Borg knew where Voyager was. Hmm

"They probably want their own body's back I suppose. They can still revive them. They'll probably try to capture their reincarnations so that they can do just that," Kiara replied.

No problem, it's not like the Doctor has a weird habit of keeping body parts, including dusted remains in his icky lab.

"I want you and the drone to go to Deck 11, that should be the most vital deck. I want a transporter lock on you at all times" Chakotay said.

Hang on, let me read this again.

Chakotay sends his grandaughter to the deck that's more likely to be inhabited by flesh eating bugs, with the previously aggressive ex-Borg drone. And I thought Mirror Universes' baby swap was the lowest moment.

Okay that's it. That bloody does it!

J/C are the worst (grand)parents ever: 1

I'll work the rest out much later when I can be bothered. And spoiler alert, they'll both be battling it out with a certain other bad parent in a one off contest in a much later Season Two episode. If you know the series, you know who I'm talking about.

"His name is Terry," Kiara said.

"Whatever," Chakotay muttered and he walked out.

*twitch*

At least Kiara cares enough to name the guest star before they both go to their certain doom

"Why are you here, I thought you always hang around with Kiara," Tom asked.

"Kiara's with that Terry guy," Bryan replied.

OH HELL NO, NOT MORE LOVE TRIANGLE SHIPPING

"I dunno. Well I don't like him, he seems really... mature. In other words boring," Bryan replied.

Probably because he's very likely a grown up and Kiara isn't. Can I eew yet?

"He's about 18 and he's more mature than me, Harry, Craig and James put together," Tom replied.

All he did was exposition. Lena must be the most mature person ever

"That's the oldest trick there is," Jessie muttered.

"Yeah, but it usually works. Speaking of which, has she said anything yet?" Craig asked.

I dunno if you remember, but moments before Chakotay ordered his four year old granddaughter into bug valley, he called for Red Alert. Yeah. Yeah. I nearly forgot too.

We're halfway btw, and the crew only think they have a problem.

"Nope, but I have," Jessie replied.

"Really, and what did you say?" Craig asked.

"I said you were a little a**hole," Jessie replied.

Jessie's Sin Points: -1

Bwahahaha, high five for that one Jess

"We knew that Lena was spying on us, so Lisa thought that if she did that it would make her more jealous," Craig replied.

"God, Lisa must be brave, or sad, or both," Jessie said.

MEAN but funny

Jessie's Sin Points: -1

"I keep sensing a presence," Lena replied. Craig looked at her strangely.

"It might be us, you twit," he said.

OH MY GOD, WE GOT A REAL BADASS OVER HERE

You know what we haven't had in a while, an off-screen moment.

"Excuse me!" Lena snapped. Everyone stared at her. "You have some nerve talking to me like that!" she yelled, and stormed back towards the turbolift.

SIGH

Once again, Lena reacts as she should and isn't to blame, but everyone looks at her as if she's not. STARE AT CRAIG

She stopped at the door, then walked back the way she came, took a tight hold of James' arm, and dragged him towards the turbolift.

"Hmm, since when has James become Lena's pet dog?" Jessie asked.

DAMN, JESSIE IS ON FIRE

Jessie's Sin Points: -1

"I don't know, don't you even care?" Craig replied.

"No, why should I?" Jessie asked without looking up from the console.

IS THIS THE EPISODE THE COUNTER GETS ZERO'D, TUNE IN NEXT TIME

Jessie's Sin Points: -10

Unlike you, she trusts the person she fancies, so sod off you insecure prick

"I know why you should... Jessie," Craig said in a strange way.

I said, sod off

"Great, who told you," Jessie muttered.

"I figured it out for myself," Craig replied.

Oh. OH. Wait, Craig doesn't know that James and Jessie have been together since Resurrection? So Jessie asking why should she care about Lena dragging James off wasn't a "no cos he's not gonna cheat on me" moment but another denialy moment. Sigh

Jessie's Sin Points: +10, previous minus revoked.

SORRY

"That's nice, you know the drill. Don't tell anyone," Jessie said.

"I won't, if you do something for me," Craig said.

Oh Craig, why haven't you been garbaged yet?

"What is it?" Jessie asked.

"I need you to help me find something," Craig replied. Jessie looked up at him.

"What do you need to find?" she asked. Craig just smiled.

Damn it Jessie, you worked so hard for those minus sins. SIGH. KICK HIM, DON'T LET HIM BLACKMAIL YOU

Jessie's Sin Points: +1

And um wait, was I wrong about that whole bit twice? My head hurts.

Kiara and Terry came out of the turbolift. Terry had even less Borg implants than before.

So, are they falling off while he walks or something?

He even grows one of his arms back in that little gap

Anyways Kiara and Terry chat, and it's not that interesting cos it's likely novel/KT Curse's dialogue.

The familiar sound of Sbaracs came quietly from the turbolift.

"Maybe, not everything is over," Terry muttered.

WAIT, HANG ON, WE ALREADY HAVE A DESCRIPTION WE CAN USE

The sound grew closer as the lift came back to a stop on their deck.

"Kiara, run now!" Terry yelled.

Kiara just stared at the door, suddenly it opened. Millions of Sbaracs ran out of the lift. Both Kiara and Terry ran for their lives.

HAHAHAHA

They took the turbolift, that's so cute

They both eventually reached Engineering with several other frightened crewmembers. Kiara waited at the door as one crewmember came around the corner.

Oh it was nice knowing you Ensign Eatmeh

The Sbaracs were too quick and the crewman was knocked onto the floor. In a matter of seconds he was covered in the bugs.

"Kiara, it's too late, seal the door!" Terry yelled. He was right, the bugs cleared and all that was left of the crewmember was charred flesh, torn clothes, and even bones.

Poor Ensign Eatmeh, he died as he lived; very briefly getting eaten by a plot device

A crewman opened a console and it erupted thousands of Sbaracs. A few seconds later there wasn't much left of the crewman.

OHNOES NOT LIEUTENANT OOPS AMDED, I LOVED THAT GUY

So, everyone else transports out before they become thirds. A few unknowns live to get eaten another scene.

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