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Q and the Grey
Two Q's appear on Voyager, both on a quest to get the human woman of their dreams.
20th March, 28th April, 7th, 11th & 17th May 2005
Scene Written (True
20th October 2001
July 2372 (early season 3)
Kathryn sat down behind her desk, "we'll be the third Starfleet ship to see one."
Chakotay smiled as he sat down opposite her. "So where will you be?"
"The bridge, I hear the Mess Hall is going to be packed," Kathryn replied. The door chimed. "Come in."
Tuvok walked through the main door, then over to the desk. "Captain, a crewmember is neglecting the replicator ration system."
Kathryn frowned, "what? How, who?"
"Whoever it is has covered his or her tracks," Tuvok replied as he handed a PADD to her. "They've somehow managed to replicate something that costs months worth of replicator rations."
"Well he or she isn't much of a thief, they've programmed it to start payment at the beginning of August," Kathryn said.
"That isn't the point Captain, that object would have took a lot of power to replicate," Chakotay said.
"That is not all. Another unknown crewmember has been replicating a lot, but paying for it straight away," Tuvok said.
"That scoundrel," Chakotay said with a smirk.
Tuvok raised an eyebrow, "all of which cost a lot, not as much as the other item however but all together it's close."
"Which crewmember would have enough to do that?" Chakotay asked.
Kathryn's face turned a shade paler, "it's all right Tuvok, I'll handle it."
"Yes Captain," Tuvok said with a nod, he stepped back out.
"What is it?" Chakotay asked.
Kathryn sighed, "there is only a few crewmembers who could have been saving rations. But out of all of those people, only one could have hacked into the system."
"We don't know that this is the same person," Chakotay said.
"Oh it is the same person," Kathryn sighed. "Think about it, what on earth would a common crewmember replicate that would cost months of rations?"
"Jewelry?" Chakotay meekly replied with a shrug.
Kathryn turned another shade paler, "what? No no, don't give me that idea."
Chakotay looked confused, "ok then what?"
"The culprit would have to be good at hacking, either been saving rations or was too busy being in a coma to use up two months of rations," Kathryn muttered.
"Oh right, James," Chakotay said. He pulled a face, "what does he want jewelry for?" Kathryn started glaring at him. "Oh I see, baby coming etc, good time for a proposal."
"Don't ever say that!" Kathryn snapped.
"Ok, if that's not what you were thinking then what?" Chakotay questioned. He frowned, "how come we were still paying him while he was in a coma?" Kathryn just sighed.
The door chimed. "Come in," James said as he entered the living room.
Kathryn stepped inside, "you didn't report to duty today."
"Uh, yes I did. I work here, you didn't know that?" James said.
Kathryn raised an eyebrow, then she looked around the room. "You don't look sick or anything."
"That's cos I'm not," James said.
Kathryn folded her arms, "what are you doing?"
"I'm uh, just..." James said. He glanced at the pile of bags in the corner of the room, next to the door he stepped out of. "Sorting stuff out."
"Oh, I take it Jessie's moving back in," Kathryn said.
"Yeah, she and Danny had a fight supposedly," James said. He turned back towards the room he came out of, "I'll be right back."
Kathryn frowned, "fine." She walked over to the bags. She tried to pick one up but it was too heavy, instead she dragged it across to the other side of the room. The doors to the other room opened. Her eyes widened as she looked inside, "oh..."
"What are you doing?" James asked. He rushed towards her.
Kathryn turned around, he took a hold of her arm and pulled her out of the doorway. "That doesn't look like Jessie's room or yours."
"Look it's just, I'm moving things around, I'm experimenting," James said, moving his hand away.
"It looks to me like a baby's room," Kathryn said.
"Yeah well, we'll need one eventually," James muttered.
"So where's Jessie staying then?" Kathryn asked, putting one hand on her hip.
James smiled nervously, "she's um, we're..."
"Oh I see, you two moved in together right?" Kathryn uncomfortably said.
"Yeah she's still moving in, I asked her, it made sense," James said.
"I suppose it does," Kathryn sighed as she turned away from him. "You're in love with her, there's a baby coming, you do already live together," she muttered to herself. She turned back to face him with a weak smile on her face, "congratulations then."
"Thanks," James said. He picked the bag she was holding like it was nothing. "I'm just moving my things, or getting rid of them to make room for her stuff. You can see that it's a lot."
Kathryn's smile turned into a smirk, "yes, what is in those bags?"
"Beats me. It could be shoes, clothes, make up," James replied.
"Isn't that a bit annoying, all this. Sometimes some people..." Kathryn said.
"No," James said with a shrug. "Actually I like that about her, it's..." He frowned, "wait, why did you ask that?"
"Well sometimes moving in together properly isn't a good idea if there's something about her you can't stand or..." Kathryn said.
"I don't believe this," James muttered. "For the first time in my life I'm actually happy, and after the incident I figured I never would be again."
"I'm sorry, I'm just worried. You should be careful, I know you love her but you don't know how she feels," Kathryn said.
"So what? I know she doesn't," James muttered.
"A baby is not a good enough reason to move in with someone like this. If she doesn't feel the same way it's going to be rougher for her. Maybe finding out before going any further would be the best idea, the best way to do that is to tell her," Kathryn said.
"I can't, that'll scare her off," James said, shaking his head. "Jess and I we're good together, no not good, great. I didn't ask her to live with me properly just because of the baby."
"No I know that. If you tell her maybe then she'll tell you where she's at," Kathryn said.
"Maybe, but I don't want to hear it," James said.
"You can't be expecting her to say she doesn't like you or something. Even I don't think she's that bad. The way she talks about you, acts around you, how protective she can be, the fact that she forgave you and wanted you back so quickly after what happened. There's definitely something there," Kathryn said.
"Ok you're the last one I thought I'd get relationship advice from. It's not like I'm going to ask her to marry me, or raise five kids in a semi with two dogs. We don't need to both be in love do we? I'm lucky to have what I have already, and that she likes me at all," James muttered.
Kathryn frowned, "ok ok, I'm sorry. I just thought, you've been replicating a lot of expensive stuff so I figured."
"That I was going to propose or something?" James questioned with a smirk on his face. "No, there's no point is there? And I have paid for everything normally so you can't get on my back for that. I just got a crib, and other stuff for the baby. There's nothing wrong with that right?"
"No, somebody hacked in and got something for free, but it looks like they'll pay for it at a later time," Kathryn replied.
"Oh, I didn't do that, I had plenty of rations anyway," James said.
"Right well, I'm sorry about..." Kathryn sighed.
"No it's nothing, I understand why you thought that's what I was up to," James said. "Ok I'd better finish off here before she comes back."
Kathryn smiled, "it's going to be ok you know."
"I know, I told you I'm happy, everything's good," James said, he smiled.
"Trust me, it's better than you think," Kathryn said as she headed for the door.
the Mess Hall:
"You're seriously telling me that you're not mad at him," Ian said.
Jessie rolled her eyes, "yep."
"And you want to live with him properly, as in sleeping with him every night, literally?" Ian said.
"Yep," Jessie groaned.
"And Danny's upset because?" Ian questioned.
"Cos she's a meddler, a bitch and she's just as anti-James as you," Jessie replied.
"There's a good reason for that, besides she's been more supportive than I expected," Ian said.
"Right supportive," Jessie laughed. "You guys used to be his friends, and now after a drunken mistake you ditch him. Remind me to hate you next time you call me baby and nearly slap my ass while you're drunk, cos it's really the exact same thing."
"Jess, you're just forgiving because of this baby and you've always been a little too obsessed with him," Ian said.
"Obsessed, wow you really don't get it," Jessie muttered. "Tell you what, you can continue judging me and annoying me with stupid similar questions when you feel about a girl, the same way I do about him."
"Do you love him?" Ian asked uncomfortably.
"As a friend I do, probably," Jessie replied. "Oh you know how I stand with that stuff, I've no idea what it's like to love someone, or be loved by someone so I don't know. People say that if you don't know then you mustn't, but for me it's unsure."
"Jess it's simple," Ian said.
"For you maybe," Jessie muttered.
Meanwhile on a table on the other side of the room, Tom and Harry were having a coffee break. Tom just tapped his commbadge, "we're on our way now."
Harry's eyes lit up, "I've wanted to see a supernova since I was little."
"Well it'll be interesting to see but it's not something I've wanted to see for years," Tom said.
"Yeah yeah," Harry smiled.
Tom shook his head as he climbed out of his chair. "It's not, I wanted to do more interesting things since I was a kid."
"Oh come on, it's once every century," Harry said as he got up. He followed Tom towards the door just as a lot of crewmembers starting coming in through both doors. "See, look how many people are coming to see this." He stopped next to Jessie and Ian's table. "Are you guys going to watch here or the bridge?"
Ian looked around the room, "it shouldn't be as packed on the bridge, right?"
"Senior officers only," Harry replied. He and Tom left the room.
"I'm there," Ian said as he got up, so did Jessie. "You coming?"
"Hmm, getting to see something explode. I think I'll give it a miss this time," Jessie replied.
"Yeah but a supernova isn't something you see every day," Ian said.
"No thanks, I do have a life you know," Jessie muttered as she walked out of the room.
Ian pouted, "oh great, she's in the insulting mood again." He slowly did the same.
Kathryn handed a small cardboard bucket to Chakotay, "popcorn?"
"It's coffee flavoured isn't it?" he questioned.
"Of course not!" Kathryn snapped. "I'm not that obsessed you know."
"All right, I apologise," Chakotay said.
"Thank you," Kathryn said.
Tom and Harry stepped out of the turbolift, followed by the Doctor, Neelix and Kes. Chakotay stood up, "you're just in time. Harry, quickly put it on screen."
Harry smiled, "yes sir." He rushed over to his station and started working at it. The viewscreen changed to show a close up of a star. "Ten seconds."
Kathryn stood up, she held out a roll of mints to Chakotay. "Mint?"
"It isn't coffee is it?" Chakotay asked carefully. The glare on her face answered his question. "No thanks."
"Guys," Tom said, pointing at the viewscreen. Everyone glanced at it just in time to see the supernova, the entire bridge burst into applause.
"Wow!" Neelix exclaimed. "That was, wow!" He turned to Tuvok, "wow, what did you think Mr Vulcan?"
Tuvok raised an eyebrow, "your inarticulate expressions of awe are notwithstanding." Everyone groaned. "It was a fascinating spectacle."
Kathryn turned around, "congratulations everyone, only two crews in the history of Starfleet have witnessed a supernova explosion."
"And none any closer than we were," Harry grinned. "We've just got a new record."
"Wow, how were we closer than the Enterprise D?" Tom asked. Harry shrugged.
"Thanks for allowing us to watch the nova here Captain, the Mess Hall still stinks of that liver and vegetable soup," Kes said.
Neelix pouted, "well Jessie liked it."
Kes sighed, "hmm, wonder why."
"Remember Kes, anyone can stargaze on the bridge, even a hologram with a portable emitter. But the real action will always be in Sickbay," the Doctor said with a smile. He headed back to the turbolift ignoring the clueless look on most of the bridge's faces.
"You know that is twenty ninth century technology, we can take it off him," Tom commented.
Kathryn smiled, "no that's not necessary." She glanced towards the Engineering station, where B'Elanna had sat herself. "Well?"
Chakotay frowned, "what is it?"
"Oh, just something I'm working on," Kathryn replied while rubbing her shoulders. "Harry, can you help B'Elanna with it?"
"Yes Captain," Harry replied.
"Captain you haven't slept in days, maybe you should get some rest. Harry and B'Elanna will handle that thing you're working on. The rest of us will keep the bridge in check," Chakotay said.
Kathryn smiled as she shook her head. "Fine, you win. I'll see you at 0800." She headed for the turbolift.
Jessie walked into the living room, she sighed as she dumped her jacket on the chair. She made her way over to where the bags once were, but not there now. "Um, James? Where's my..."
James stepped out of the door nearby, "Jess, you're back."
"Yep, where's my bags?" Jessie asked.
"Oh right, don't be mad at me," James said, he took a hold of her arm. "Can I show you something first." He led her to the door.
"I'm kinda worried now at the mad at me part, you didn't set fire to them did you?" Jessie questioned.
"No nothing like that," James replied. They stepped into the room, Jessie's eyes lit up as she looked around.
"My god, you cleaned the floor," she said.
"Yeah," James said as he walked to the cupboard. Jessie followed him while looking around. He beckoned his head towards the cupboard. "Go on."
"Ok, is my bags in there or did you..." Jessie said as she opened it. "Oh."
"I know you have a lot of clothes and you like to organise them, and I didn't know how much space you'd need," James said.
"So where is all your stuff?" Jessie questioned, she looked over towards the bed. All her bags were standing beside them. "Where did all your stuff go?"
"I didn't have much in the first place, and I got rid of some stuff. It's your room now so I had to sort it out for you," James muttered. "I was going to put away everything but you'd of killed me for sure."
Jessie smiled as she placed a hand on his arm, "what are you like, you didn't have to." She knelt down next to the bags and started to open one. "Did you watch the supernova?"
"What supernova?" James questioned.
Jessie dragged one of the bags onto the bed. "You didn't know about it? I thought everybody did."
"Well somehow I'll find the will to live on," James said, heading back towards the door. "Before you start there, there's something else I want to show you." He stepped out. Jessie frowned and followed him.
Kathryn stepped into her quarters, her eyes widened as she stared in front of her. Her sofa had been replaced with a big bed, covered in red satin sheets. The lights were dimmed, candles standing next to the bed just managed to light the room.
She tapped her commbadge as she slowly walked in further, "Janeway to Security, intruder alert."
Q stepped into sight from the door of the bedroom. "There's no need to call room service Kathy, I already ordered."
Kathryn groaned into her hand, "oh god. Janeway to Security, intruder alert!"
Q strolled over to the bed, he picked up a glass of wine that was standing next to the bed. "Don't bother, I've taken the proverbial phone off the hook. After all, we don't want any interruptions."
"What are you doing here?" Kathryn asked.
Q raised the glass, "to us."
"Us, when has there ever been an us?" Kathryn grumbled.
"The night is young, and the sheets are satin," Q said as he rested a hand on the bed.
"I want you out, but first get rid of all this," Kathryn said.
"I have no intention of getting between those Starfleet-issue sheets. They give me a terrible rash," Q muttered with a pout.
"Since you won't be getting in the bed, I wouldn't worry about it," Kathryn said as she turned and walked away.
"Oh, Kathy, don't be such a prude," Q purred as he made his way over. She turned around just in time to get his arm around her waist. "Admit it, it has been a while."
"And it'll probably be a while longer, now get out," Kathryn snapped. She tried to pull herself away but Q pulled her right back.
"So tense. Why don't you slip into something more comfortable," Q said, loosening his grip on her.
Kathryn's uniform disappeared and she was now in a pink satin night gown. She looked down at herself and sighed. "If you think that this puerile attempt at seduction is going to work, you're even more self-deluded than I thought," she snarled. She turned away from him. He grabbed her arm, he pulled her around so she was hovering over the bed and he may as well have been lying over her.
"Oh, I see, you think interested in some tawdry one-night stand. That's because I haven't told you why I'm here yet," Q said. "Of all the females of all the species in all the galaxies.. I have chosen you to be the mother of my child."
Kathryn's mouth dropped in shock.
James and Jessie were now inside Jessie's old bedroom. Now it had a crib nearby the window, which was half filled with cuddly toys and there was a row of two shelves, which also had toys sitting on them.
"Well? It's not finished but what do you think?" James asked, looking really nervous.
Jessie went over to the crib, she leaned over to pick up one of the bears. "It's great, but..."
"I know, there was nowhere to put your old bed. I didn't even know what you wanted doing with it," James said.
"I'll transport it to the cargo bay replicator, I might get lots of rations for it," Jessie said. She turned to him, "that's not what I meant though. You managed to replicate a lot of cuddly toys."
"Um it's not like I can't touch them or anything Jess," James said.
Jessie smiled cheekily, "I know you can."
James shook his head and raised an eyebrow, "all right, I gotta go. Tuvok wants me to work night shift as I skived today."
"You skive most of the time anyway," Jessie said.
"I know, but I shouldn't try telling him," James said. He turned to leave the room.
Jessie turned back to the crib, she put down the bear and picked up a different toy.
Kathryn was now lying on the bed, with Q over her. She pushed him away enough to climb away from him, and off the bed. She rushed over towards her bedroom. Q sighed and sat down on the bed instead.
"I know that you're probably asking yourself, 'Why would a brilliant, handsome, dashingly omnipotent being like Q want to mate with a scrawny little bipedal specimen like me?"
"Let me guess, no-one else in the universe will have you!" Janeway called from her room.
Q made his way over to the bedroom doorway. "Nonsense. I could have chosen a Klingon Targ, a Romulan empress, a Cyrillian microbe."
Kathryn appeared at the doorway, "really? I beat out a single-celled organism? How flattering." She tried to re-enter the living room, but Q blocked her by putting his hand on the other side of the doorway.
"It's an overwhelming honour isn't it?" he said. "I can't get you out of my mind. You're confident, passionate, beautiful.."
"Really disgusted and totally uninterested," Kathryn said. She ducked so she could go under his arm and get away. He quickly followed her. She stood behind her desk, he sat down on it.
"Kathy, you can't leave. My cosmic clock is ticking. Besides you have no idea what you're missing. Foreplay with a Q can last for decades," he said.
"Sorry, but I'm busy for the next sixty or seventy years," Kathryn said as she sat down.
"Oh, I see, this is one of those silly human rituals. You're playing hard to get," Q said.
"As far as you're concerned, Q, I'm impossible to get," Kathryn said.
Q's face lit up, "goody, a challenge. This is going to be fun." He clicked his fingers and disappeared in the usual flash of light. The room turned back to normal.
Kathryn worked at her computer, "Janeway to the bridge."
In: "Chakotay here."
"I've just had a visit from Q," Kathryn said.
In: "Q? What did he want?"
"Let's just say he had a personal request," Kathryn replied.
"I have a feeling he'll be back, alert me if he does. Janeway out," Kathryn said. She buried her face in her hands.
Jessie turned over in the bed, she opened her eyes and sat up slightly. She pulled herself out of the bed and made her way over to the door, it opened. Her eyes widened as she looked around the room. The entire living room was lit up by a few hundred candles standing everywhere. She made her way to the centre of the room.
"What the?" Jessie muttered. "Computer, is there anyone else in my quarters?"
"Negative," the computer responded.
"Um check again," Jessie said.
Somebody walked up behind her. "Hey," a familiar voice said.
Jessie groaned, "no no." She turned around to come face to face with a familiar Q.
"Oh wow, I've forgotten how beautiful you are," he said.
"What are you doing here?" Jessie asked. "And what's with the candles?"
"Don't you think it's romantic?" Nutty Q asked. He tried to slip an arm around her, she slapped it away.
"No, what do you, I mean why did you..." Jessie stuttered in a high pitched voice.
"Shush my beloved," Nutty Q whispered as he stepped closer. "There's something I have to tell you."
"Ok," Jessie said, looking uncomfortable.
Q took a hold of her hand with both of his. "I can't stop thinking about you. You are funny, sweet, strong and how could I forget your beauty."
"You said you did," Jessie said.
"No I meant you're more beautiful than I remember," Nutty Q said.
"Um whatever," Jessie muttered, she pulled herself away and eyed some of the candles. "Can you please stop, fire hazard."
"Fine," Nutty Q sighed. With a quick wave of a hand the candles disappeared, and a bunch of roses appeared in his other hand. "Here, these are for you."
Jessie took them off him looking disgusted, "flowers? I'm not a flower person." She tossed them over her shoulder.
"Aaaw, I missed you," Nutty Q said with a grin. He quickly lunged forward and hugged her tightly.
"The feeling's not mutual," Jessie grumbled as she tried to get away.
"Your hair smells nice," Nutty Q sighed.
Jessie pulled a face. Nutty Q pulled a different kind of face and loosened his grip, Jessie quickly rushed away from him.
"And you still kick as hard as you used to," he said in a squeakier voice.
"I've been practising," Jessie muttered. "Now can you go?"
"No, I still haven't told you what I want to tell you," Nutty Q replied.
"Well unless it's about you leaving me alone forever or you dying, I don't wanna hear it," Jessie said.
"Oh you're so funny," Nutty Q laughed. He walked closer to her and took a hold of her hand again. "I just want you to know that I've fallen in love with you."
Jessie glanced around looking uncomfortable. "As a friend?"
"No my sweet, and that's not all," Nutty Q said. "You are the most beautiful creature that has ever existed, I'm an omnipotent Q. It would be a waste not to."
"I'm sorry, omnipotent or impotent?" Jessie muttered with a worried expression on her face. "Wait waste not to, what?"
"Our DNA together would create a creature that every being will be jealous of," Nutty Q said.
Jessie's eyes widened, "oh no, no DNA mixing."
"Why not?" Nutty Q asked.
"Because you're creeping me out, and I don't like you. I thought I've made that clear," Jessie replied.
Nutty Q started pouting, "how am I creeping you out? Surely a girl like you has many men queuing up."
"Huh, no and I..." Jessie stuttered.
"A girl like you deserves to be paired with the best, it's called natural selection," Nutty Q said.
Jessie backed off a metre or two, "no it's not. Q's are immortal, they don't need to uh, breed. And don't you have less powers than other Q's?"
"Oh, I'm hurt," Nutty Q muttered.
"Uh huh, does that mean you're going now?" Jessie asked.
"Ohno, you don't just split up because of a fight. I'll be right back sweetheart," Nutty Q replied. He disappeared with a wave of a hand.
Jessie sighed in relief, "finally." She turned to go back to the bedroom.
the FVDA's quarters:
Damien marched into the room muttering to himself. He dumped a PADD onto the table. "Fools, don't they know anything?"
In the bathroom the oldest member of the FVA, Tim was busy opening the Mracle Hide Your Wrinkles cream. He looked a lot worse than he usually did until he started putting it on. It made him look twenty years younger, but he now looked the way he usually looks.
"Ah, I remember in my day they didn't have miracle cream," he said, looking in awe at the mirror. He then overheard Damien talking to himself, instead of leaving he decided to press his ear against the door. Yes he also has Miracle Hearing Cream too.
Damien picked up a remote and switched on a medium flatscreen TV they had in the corner. "Computer interface with the TV's DVD player with the database. Show me a list of movies with a villain that has stupid minions, is misunderstood and turns good."
A massive list of movie titles appeared on the TV screen.
"Ok computer, play Pokémon the First Movie," Damien said.
The computer responded, "acknowledged, do you want to skip the mini movie before it?"
"No, leave it," Damien replied.
long minutes later:
Damien was staring at the screen looking slightly brain dead. "What...was... that?"
Finally the movie started. He started taking notes as soon as the villain, Mewtwo came on the screen. "Mmm hmm. Cloned, nope. Mistreated, oh yes. Made a slave, yes damn Brannon and Rick."
He stared in awe when Giovanni appeared on the screen, "oh wow, I like that guys style, well except for the orange suit eugh. Team Rocket ey. Computer is the guy in the suit the main villain?"
"Negative," the computer responded. "He did match one of the details you entered; incapable minions."
"Hmm ok," Damien sighed. He continued taking notes.
Meanwhile Tim moved away from the door looking confused. "What is he up to?"
Damien was now really enjoying the movie, he was sitting on the edge of his seat and was doing some arm gestures. "Wow, this Mewtwo rules. The idiots will definitely fall for this."
Meanwhile Tim had fallen asleep against the door, snoring quietly.
"Wow that was good. Computer show me the series this movie is based on, only if it does show that boss guy and his minions," Damien ordered. "If it doesn't then show me that ReBoot movie you had in the list."
The computer responded, "acknowledged."
"Stand by, I need the toilet," Damien muttered as he got up. He stopped nearby the bathroom door. "Hmm I wonder if Mewtwo was cloned in a way so he didn't need it. That would be cool." He pressed the button next to the door, Tim fell to the ground as the door opened. "None of his minions were as bad as this, and they were mindless animals," he grumbled as he stepped into the bathroom.
Jessie was fast asleep in the bed when a flash of light lit up the room. Nutty Q appeared next to the bed, he tilted his head to the side.
"How is this woman still single?" he asked, placing a hand across his mouth.
Jessie groaned as she rolled onto her side. The sheet slid off her shoulder so he could see she was sleeping in a jacket that obviously wasn't hers.
"Hmm," Nutty Q sighed. His eyes narrowed as he eyed the jacket, then he looked around the room. "Computer, whose quarters are these?"
The computer responded, "James Taylor-Stuarts and Jessie Rex-Annet's." Her voice made Jessie turn onto her back, and her eyes twitch a little.
"What, so what's she..." Nutty Q stuttered. He spotted the empty bags next to the bed, "is this?"
"What the?" Jessie muttered, sitting up slightly. She then spotted Nutty Q standing nearby, she sat up right and closed the jacket she had on. "Q, what are you doing here, again!?"
"Ohno no, I don't owe you anything. You are the one who owe's me answers!" Nutty Q snapped.
"Uh, what do you mean? You're the one who's watched me sleeping, twice," Jessie grumbled.
Nutty Q narrowed his eyes again, "why didn't you tell me you were already with somebody else."
"What makes you think I am?" Jessie asked.
"Your bags are lying around here, this kinda looks like a guy's room and the jacket you have on is guyish, and doesn't fit," Nutty Q replied.
"All right fine, but I didn't have to tell you," Jessie said. She smiled slyly, "so does this mean you won't pursue me now?"
Nutty Q folded his arms, "I've been researching human mating rituals, you being with someone doesn't mean it's too late."
Jessie rolled her eyes, "oh my god, it is."
"Really? I highly doubt the freak is marriage material, besides he'll be dead in no time at all," Nutty Q said.
Jessie pulled herself off the bed, she turned back to him. "You really do have a way with the ladies, don't you?"
"Why yes I think I do," Nutty Q said smugly.
"Q's obviously have no clue what sarcasm is," Jessie shook her head.
The doors opened, the two glanced in it's direction. "What's going on?" James asked as he stepped inside. "Q, what are you doing here?"
Nutty Q's eyes narrowed yet again, "you." He marched over to him. "You lying scum, you told me you didn't like her."
"Um when did I say that, and you still haven't answered my question," James said.
"No you said you had no intention of going for it with her. I respected you for that as let's face it, you're way out of her league," Nutty Q said.
James pulled a face as he moved a little to the left so he could see Jessie. She shrugged her shoulders, "he's just playing around, you know like most of the guys in our class did. You know, pretending to want me."
James closed his eyes and groaned, "Jess, most of them weren't playing around."
Nutty Q turned around with a look of horror on his face. "Playing around, I'm dead serious."
"Well that's too bad," James muttered.
"You, how could you? She should be with the best, and you're not it," Nutty Q said.
"And you think you are? You're the weakest Q there is," James said.
"Fine but you are only human," Nutty Q snapped.
Jessie put one hand on her hip, "oh I see, I'm only human too."
"Yes but you're the best of the lot of them, way too good to be human," Nutty Q said.
"Ok but James isn't exactly a run of the mill human, so doesn't that mean..." Jessie said.
"Oh right, he is born with extra strength just because he happened to be born on a certain day. Yes that makes him worthy," Nutty Q muttered.
"I doubt that's how it works," Jessie groaned.
"Ok that's enough," James muttered. He turned back to Nutty Q, "FYI Q, I never said I wasn't interested in her. We were already together when you and I met anyway."
Nutty Q gasped, "is this true?"
"Yep," Jessie replied.
"No matter, this isn't over. Jessie is my one true love, and I'll make her mine. I won't let some lying scum of a human stand in my way," Nutty Q grumbled. He disappeared.
"Well that's just great," Jessie sighed.
James made his way over to her. "That was interesting."
"For you maybe, but it's just been one disturbing night," Jessie muttered.
"Sorry it's just he said I was scum, and I held back and everything," James said.
Jessie smiled, "he's just jealous of you."
"It's too early in the morning to make jokes Jess," James said with a smirk on his face.
"He's going to come back, what on earth are we going to do?" Jessie asked as she sat down on the bed.
James sat down beside her, he slipped an arm around her. "He's done this before, by tomorrow he'll be gone."
"Or maybe he'll swap me for someone else," Jessie said with a smile.
"That'll be more proof that he's mad," James said. Jessie shook her head before resting it on his shoulder, he rested his own head on hers.
Kathryn yawned into her hand, while the other hand steadily held a coffee cup. The door chimed. "Come in," she yawned.
Chakotay strolled inside, he stopped in front of her desk. "I've got all the data from the supernova," he said, handing over a PADD. She took it off him.
Kathryn kept her focus on the PADD she had already. In the corner of her eye she noticed Chakotay was still standing where he was before. She finally glanced at him, "is there something else?"
"Have you had anymore visits from Q?" he asked.
"No, there was just one," Kathryn replied.
"What exactly did he want? You said it was a personal request," Chakotay questioned.
Kathryn sighed as she put down the PADD. "He wants to mate with me."
Chakotay's face turned a shade paler, his eyes moved to the right as he tilted his head down. "I see."
"Of course it's out of the question. He obviously has some sort of hidden agenda, it won't be long until he gives it up," Kathryn said.
Chakotay's shoulders raised, eyes rolled a little. "Perhaps."
Kathryn looked up at him with concern in her eyes. She pulled herself out of the chair, placed a hand on the desk while resting the other one on his shoulder. "Oh Chakotay."
"I know I don't have any right to feel this way, but this bothers the hell out of me," Chakotay muttered quietly.
"I do believe you're jealous," a familiar voice said. Kathryn turned her head to the left, Chakotay to the right. "Why didn't you tell me there was another man," Q growled.
Kathryn backed away from Chakotay and the desk, both of them turned to face Q.
"There isn't, I'm just not interested in you," Kathryn said icily.
Chakotay smiled slightly and took one step forward, "any questions?"
"Yes I have one. Would you be capable of raising a child, Chuckles?" Q questioned.
"Q," Kathryn said in a warning tone of voice.
"I don't think you would, the way you've treated Kathy's is proof enough," Q said.
Kathryn and Chakotay glanced at each other with wide eyes. Kathryn quickly shook it off as she looked back at Q. "And I have no doubt in my mind that you'd be an excellent father," Kathryn sarcastically said. She walked around her desk and made her way out of the room.
Chakotay stared at Q with a smirk on his face. He turned to follow her. Q remained where he was, managing to fume slightly.
Damien stepped out of the bathroom only to come face to face with Tim, stopping him in his tracks. "I wasn't in there that long," he snapped.
"I know what you're up to Damien. I overheard everything," Tim said coldly.
Damien's eyes shifted nervously, "what are you talking about?"
"I know all of your plans, and I'm going to share them with the rest of our crew," Tim said. "Unless you convince me otherwise."
Damien raised an eyebrow, "ok then, don't tell them what you think you know."
"That's not what I meant," Tim said.
"What, do you want money?" Damien asked, smirking.
"You know what I want," Tim replied.
"I'm hoping I don't," Damien muttered, looking disgusted.
Tim smiled, "Johnny burned the contract, I need a new..."
"I'd rather go to a strip club that has clones of Neelix working there, than do that," Damien grumbled.
"Ok fine, I'll uh tell the crew what I know," Tim said.
"Which is what exactly?" Damien asked.
"That you were um, up to something," Tim replied nervously.
Damien rolled his eyes as he walked around him.
James stepped out of the turbolift looking slightly annoyed. "I have to do everything myself," he muttered.
Half way down the corridor Nutty Q appeared right in front of him.
"What do you want now?" James groaned.
"I challenge you," Nutty Q snarled. He raised a white glove and slapped him with it, "to a duel."
He stared at him with wide eyes. "My god, is this why you're known as Nutty Q?"
"Yes, I'm nuts about that woman, I bet you can't say the same," Nutty Q replied.
James shook his head, "no I meant that you're just crazy."
Nutty Q backed off a few steps, a gun appeared in both of his hands. "The winner will get Jessie."
"Look she doesn't like you. Even if you did win it wouldn't make a difference," James muttered.
Nutty Q smiled smugly, "are you afraid to lose." He held out one of the guns. "This is a human ritual, surely you will know it."
"Ok one, it's not a ritual, two I doubt this has been done in centuries," James said. "And it doesn't matter."
Nutty Q shoved the gun into his hands. "First one to draw wins."
"All right, I'll humour you," James groaned. "Wait, how do we know who's the winner?"
"The loser will of gotten shot, obviously," Nutty Q said.
"Oh I see, you just want to kill me. If you win, I'm dead. If I win then nothing's changed," James said.
"Nonsense, I am no killer. I'll just shoot an arm or something," Nutty Q said.
"Ookay," James muttered.
Nutty Q turned away and walked down the corridor. He stopped about six metres down.
James sighed as he placed one hand on his hip. "Wouldn't it be easier to face off?"
"Oh right," Nutty Q muttered. He turned around while putting his gun into a gun pocket by his waist.
James put his behind his back and folded his arms. "Mine better not be blank."
"Cheat, me? Never, it isn't an honourable way. I want to do this properly," Nutty Q gasped.
"All right," James said. They stood in silence and still. Nutty Q grabbed his gun first, James a second later. They both aimed and fired. A clang of metal sounded, two bullets fell to the ground.
"What, how did you do that?" Nutty Q stuttered.
"I had a little target practise with these recently," James said as he re-folded his arms.
"No need for smugness, that makes it a tie," Nutty Q grumbled before disappearing.
Kathryn was busy working on another cup of coffee, reading the PADD Chakotay had given her.
In: "Bridge to Captain."
Kathryn tapped her commbadge, "yes?"
In: "You'd better come see this Captain."
Kathryn sighed as she stood up.
"Careful not to touch anything," Chakotay said as he circled the now rose filled bridge.
"Ow," Tom grunted, jumping out of his chair.
"What did I just say," Chakotay smirked.
"No, I was sitting on some and I moved," Tom muttered while rubbing his butt.
Kathryn stepped out of her Ready Room, her eyes went wide. "What on earth!"
"They just appeared," Chakotay muttered.
Kathryn slowly made her way to the centre of the bridge. "Great, Q?"
Q appeared in front of her. "What do you think my darling? I think it brings that touch of colour this room desperately needs."
"Q, this is a bridge, get rid of them," Kathryn grumbled.
Q's face fell, "don't tell me you're a blue kind of girl." He clicked his fingers, all of the roses changed from red to blue. "What about white?"
"Q!" Kathryn snapped, using her infamous death glare on him.
"But girls love flowers," Q said with a pout. "Oh fine," he clicked his fingers again, the bridge turned back to normal and he disappeared.
Kathryn relaxed her shoulders and sighed, "has he been appearing anywhere else Commander?"
Chakotay was about to answer when Jessie stepped out of the turbolift, pursued by Nutty Q. "Eeew no, turbolifts are not aphrodisiac nests or whatever you called it, and again no!"
"But those other inferior humans act like that it is," Nutty Q said.
Jessie turned around to point a finger in his face, "listen mister, if you try to kiss me again you won't be able to mate at all. And don't say you're Q, you don't have one."
"I do in this form, remember I can be anything for you," Nutty Q said. He took a hold of her finger, he quickly kissed it briefly.
"Eeew stop that!" Jessie snapped, she stormed away. Nutty Q was in pursuit again.
"That one's dicing with death," Tom commented.
"Just tell me what you want me to be, and I'll be. I'd do anything for you my love," Nutty Q sighed.
"Fine ok, I want you to be gone," Jessie grumbled.
"Sure beautiful," Nutty Q said. He disappeared again. She sighed in relief but he reappeared very quickly. "I'm sorry my sweet, I missed you."
"Look accept the fact that I'll never like you," Jessie muttered. "I'm with James, we're happy and it's serious, he is the only one for me," she whispered.
"But I can give you anything you desire, that would make you happy. I could make a gorgeous creature like yourself immortal, it would be a waste otherwise," Nutty Q said.
"I already have everything I want at this point, please just leave me alone," Jessie muttered.
"All right," Nutty Q shrugged his shoulders. "I'll see you later. I miss you already." He finally left.
"Wow, it must be Q mating season," Tom commented.
Kathryn turned to him, again using her death glare.
Nutty Q appeared behind Q, he rolled his eyes and turned to him. "Why must you always try to butt in with everything I do?" Nutty Q grumbled.
"Because everything you do causes chaos," Q replied. He folded his arms, "what do you think you're doing anyway. Don't you remember what happened the last time you tried this?"
"What are you talking about, I wouldn't," Nutty Q stuttered, eyes shifting nervously.
"You're pursuing a girl exactly like you did before," Q said.
"That is ridiculous," Nutty Q gasped.
"No it's not, you are following a girl. Who is it?" Q asked.
"If you're so all knowing then you should be able to tell me," Nutty Q replied.
Q shook his head, "you'd think you would have learned from your earlier mistake."
"I have, and how is this different from what you're doing with Janeway?" Nutty Q muttered.
"I could give you a list," Q grumbled.
"No, I don't see why my baby can't be the one. You can't stand the fact that my DNA could save the Q continuum," Nutty Q said.
"How is that fact? It is only fact if the sentence made sense and it was true. Yours and hers would only cause chaos," Q said.
"I realise I made the wrong choice now, why do you think I'm here," Nutty Q said, eyes shifting nervously.
"Ah, we're getting somewhere, unlike somebody," Q said smugly.
Nutty Q folded his arms and narrowed his eyes. "And you think you are with that Captain? I must admit, watching you for the last few hours has been amusing."
"I could say the same," Q said.
"You don't even know who I'm in love with, so ha! You haven't seen a thing," Nutty Q said.
"I don't need to," Q muttered. "You do remember what you have to do when all of this is sorted, don't you?"
"Get all my powers back?" Nutty Q questioned.
Q laughed, "you wish." His face turned serious, "you've got to sort out your mess."
Nutty Q folded his arms, "all right fine, but I do have more important matters to take care of first."
"What, getting rejected?" Q sniggered.
"Well you're doing enough of that for the two of us," Nutty Q said smugly.
"Such maturity. No wonder you keep getting rejected by humans," Q said.
Nutty Q narrowed his eyes, "you know I'm going to win her heart eventually." Q continued sniggering. "If I do you're going to be so sorry."
"Why would I?" Q questioned.
"Cos if I win, I'm going to choose your girl to be the carrier," Nutty Q replied.
"You can't do that," Q muttered.
"Why not? It stays in the family then," Nutty Q said, smiling evily.
"What am I worried about? You won't ever win," Q said, rolling his eyes. "Fine it's a deal, but if I win your girl is the carrier."
"Yes, deal," Nutty Q said.
Q sighed, "great, now who is she?"
Nutty Q smiled and sighed, "she's the most gorgeous creature in the cosmos. It's a shame she's human." He started to get tears in his eyes, "in about eighty years or so, she'll be gone."
"I don't think this'll work if you're trying to get the same woman I am," Q said.
Nutty Q shook it off, he put both hands on his hips. "No, Jessie is far superior to your coffee obsessed Captain."
"In your inferior opinion, Kath..." Q said. He raised his eyebrow, "wait, Jessie who?"
"It's either Rex or Annet, maybe both," Nutty Q replied.
Q groaned, "well our deal's off."
"Why, you're scared I'm going to win or are you forfeiting all together?" Nutty Q asked.
"You should, not me," Q muttered.
"What, why? Oh you know she's with the freakazoid, don't worry about him," Nutty Q said.
"I won't, but you should be. Maybe you should have tried this a few months ago," Q said.
"Why exactly?" Nutty Q questioned.
"Because what you're trying to do with her, he's already beaten you to it," Q said. "And in the other reality he managed it about three times, I doubt this reality will be any different."
Nutty Q stared at him with wide eyes, "but, but, you're just trying to put me off. I don't believe you." He disappeared leaving the other Q to smile smugly, but it didn't last long.
"Oh great, who's going to be the carrier now," he muttered.
"I don't know. He tried to hit on me before, but he gave up quickly," Jessie said.
Kathryn shook her head, then covered her face with her hands. "A different Q paid me a visit as well. It can't be a coincidence."
Jessie frowned as she sat down opposite her. "You think they're up to something?"
Kathryn folded her arms on the desk, "I do now."
"Since yesterday, well this morning technically?" Jessie questioned.
"Yes last night," Kathryn replied. She keyed in a few commands on her computer.
"It's just so typical. The first person to say they loved me had to be him, and he probably was lying," Jessie muttered to herself.
"Shush, I'm going to send a message to the crew," Kathryn snapped.
"I'm sorry," Jessie sarcastically said with a raised eyebrow.
Kathryn cleared her throat, she pressed one more button. "Janeway to all hands. Last night we had a visit by two Q's. If you encounter either of them, do anything you can to find out what they're up to. Janeway out."
She fiddled with the computer again, "Captains Log Supple..." She pressed another button and turned her attention back to Jessie. "What did you say before?"
"Um, I'm sorry in a sarcastic tone," Jessie replied.
"No, before that," Kathryn said. "That Q said he loved you?"
"Yeah, I'm still clinging to the hope that he was lying," Jessie replied.
"You said that he was the first person," Kathryn muttered.
"Uh huh, what's the problem?" Jessie questioned.
"It sounded to me like you had something else to say," Kathryn replied.
"Doesn't matter, you told me to be quiet," Jessie said as she got back up. "I'd better find James just in case, Q probably sees him as a rival now."
"Yes, that's probably a good idea," Kathryn said.
Jessie turned to leave. Kathryn turned back to her computer.
The Mess Hall:
Tom and Harry were busy working on a couple of PADDs while sitting at a table.
Tom sipped at his coffee, "you know, we need a better place to do these."
"You're complaining already, you've only been doing this for a minute," Harry said, raising an eyebrow.
"What can I say, I'd rather be at the helm all day," Tom muttered while rubbing his left shoulder.
Q appeared beside their table, making them jump and spill their coffee a little. He sat down in the chair in between them. "Hi guys, can I join you?"
"Um yeah I guess," Tom muttered.
Q grabbed Harry's cup of coffee and drank some of it. He pulled a face as he put it back down. "Seriously, how can you people drink this stuff?"
"No wonder you're having problems with the Captain," Harry said with a smirk.
Tom smiled, "ok Q, what do you want?"
"Well I was wondering if you guys know the deal with your Captain. I've done everything for this woman," Q replied.
"I doubt that, what have you done?" Tom asked.
"Let's see, I've tried filling the bridge with roses, writing Vogon love sonnets, serenading her in her bath," Q replied.
"Uh huh, you should have tried filling the bridge with coffee," Tom commented.
"I did fill her bath with warm coffee, and I promised an infinite supply," Q said. "But no matter what lengths I go through to win her heart, she rejects me. Me, how is that possible? Come on guys, you should know all the reasons for rejection."
Tom and Harry glanced at each other, not looking very happy. "I'll have you know we're..." Tom said, sniggering a little. "Sorry I'm, very popular with some of the girls around here."
"I didn't come here to see a comic, I want the news," Q said.
Tom pouted, Harry shook his head. "Have you ever thought that she just doesn't like you."
"No," Q replied sarcastically.
"All right. We know about your little visits on the Enterprise. We know your little visits usually turn out to be more than meet the eye, so..." Tom said.
Q climbed out of his chair, "thanks guys." He walked away, leaving the two staring blankly at where he once sat. He made his way over to the kitchen. "You, kitchen rodent."
Neelix turned to him looking insulted, "the name is Neelix."
"Whatever, get me one of those coffee's," Q said.
"No, not until I know why you're bothering the Captain," Neelix muttered.
"Captain Janeway. Now that's a subject I wanted to discuss," Q cheerfully said. "Tell me, what are some of her favorite things? Chocolate truffles? Stuffed animals? Erotic art?"
"You can't bribe Captain Janeway!" Neelix snapped.
"Oh no? Isn't that what you do," Q said.
"What are you talking about?" Neelix grumbled.
"I understand that you acquire things for her. Create little interesting diversions. Prepare little tasty treats. After all, why else would she be so fond of your fur-lined face," Q said. He reached over and plucked a hair from his face.
"You want to know why Captain Janeway likes me, well I'll tell you," Neelix muttered angrily. "I'm respectful, loyal, and most of all sincere. And those are qualities someone like you could never hope to possess." He stormed further into the kitchen.
Q turned around with a devious smile on his face.
Jessie stepped out of the turbolift and made her way down the corridor. She turned to the corner only to find Nutty Q standing there, like he was waiting for her.
"Q not again, I told you to leave me alone," she groaned.
"A little annoying birdy told me something about you, but it's not true is it?" he said.
"What was it?" Jessie asked with a sigh.
Nutty Q quickly put an arm around her to pull her closer, he placed his right hand just below her stomach.
She pushed him away. "What are you doing!?"
His face was now as pale as the walls, his right hand shook as he stared at where it was before. "Oh my god it is."
"Ok I've had enough of this. You don't just assume that a girl you like will like you back, you can't just..." Jessie grumbled.
"It's true, he's already..." Q stuttered, interrupting her. He finally made eye contact with her. "You've already mated, with him."
"I wish you'd stop speaking like that too, humans don't talk like that," Jessie muttered. She glanced around to see if anyone was around, there wasn't. "And yes I have."
"And to think I helped him," Nutty Q grumbled. Colour was now returning to his face. "How could he do this to me, he knew I liked you. He now claims you were already together, I don't think so, unless he lied to me. He doesn't deserve you," he muttered, face now a deep pink colour. "I'll see to this." He disappeared.
"Oh great," Jessie groaned. She continued down the corridor, quicker than she was walking before.
Tuvok walked in with his arms behind his back. James looked up from his desk, he gave him a quick roll of the eyes before turning back to the computer.
"It's not my fault they don't listen to me, so don't even bother," he muttered.
"I am aware of the situation. I've already talked to the team," Tuvok said.
"And?" James questioned.
"They said they wouldn't take orders from you, and that a lot of teams feel the same," Tuvok replied.
James shrugged, "I expected that."
"It is under control however," Tuvok said.
"Good, I don't like having to break up cat fights," James said.
Tuvok raised an eyebrow, "indeed, where is the report for that incident?"
James handed him one of the PADDs on the desk. Tuvok's eyebrow went higher as he read it. "What? I haven't had time to write a good one, have I? Most of the stuff that's happened, I've had to deal with."
"Very well," Tuvok said, handing the PADD back. "Please send the reports once you've finished them." He turned to leave.
"Aye aye sir," James muttered as he turned back to the computer.
A brief flash of light made him glance away again though. Nutty Q was standing in front of the desk, face now red, his arms folded.
"I haven't got time for another challenge, go away," James said.
"How could you, don't you have any respect," Nutty Q snapped.
"What are you talking about?" James asked, not sounding at all bothered.
Nutty Q slammed his hands down onto the desk, "Jessie. She is a wonderful girl, guys like you she should just spit on and look at in disgust. What did you do, is it mind control or a spell?"
"I didn't and wouldn't do anything to her," James said.
"Oh, I beg to differ," Nutty Q grumbled. "You obviously don't care about her, if you did you wouldn't have just mindlessly mated with her."
"No offense, but isn't that what you're trying to do?" James muttered.
"At least I know where I stand with her, I'm just worthy, only just," Nutty Q said.
"No you're not, and it doesn't work like that," James said. He pulled himself to his feet. "You're seriously telling me you think you have a chance with her. She can't stand the sight of you, can't you see that?"
"That's because you've done something to her!" Nutty Q snapped. "Also you've infected her. I love that girl and I won't let you get away with it."
"You say that like she's got an illness, she doesn't," James muttered.
"She kinda does. That thing inside her is half you, and that to me is an illness," Nutty Q said.
James just shook his head, "you really can't stand it, can you? It wouldn't matter if she was pregnant or not. It wouldn't matter if she was single and I wasn't around. You never had a chance in hell. You being a Q doesn't mean you're instantly good enough for her."
"I had to try didn't I, besides you're wrong. You managed, how hard can it be?" Nutty Q muttered.
"Now you're insulting her, now I'm convinced that it's true love," James muttered.
Nutty Q straightened up, "I wasn't."
"You basically said that she's easy," James said.
Nutty Q's eyes narrowed, "you tricked me into saying that."
"My god," James muttered to himself, turning away.
"I would never have a bad thing to say about her. I was just joking," Nutty Q stuttered.
"Didn't sound like you were," James said.
"I know what you're doing," Nutty Q said. He leaned on the desk again. "You're just trying to get me mad."
"That's what you were doing to me, right?" James said.
"You had no right!" Nutty Q snapped. "We're meant to be, I love her and she's just been brainwashed by you."
James shook his head as he made his way around the table. "Look, just because you love her doesn't mean you're in with her. Trust me on this."
"Right," Nutty Q laughed. "You Slayers are incapable of loving anyone, that's the whole point. Don't give me that."
"Ok you saw her from a distance and decided you liked her, that's not love, that's called a crush," James muttered.
"You can't start telling me what I'm feeling!" Nutty Q bellowed.
"I know what you're feeling all right, I had one too many crushes in my teens, that's all it is," James said. "I've loved her for years, way before you even knew she existed. So cut the jealous heartbroken rejection crap, and get over yourself."
"This is not a crush. If you loved her you would get that," Nutty Q muttered.
"For crying out loud. You barely know her so how can you love her as much as you claim?" James said.
"Hmm sounds like someone didn't fall for her charm at first sight. Somebody had to work hard to like her," Nutty Q said smugly.
"Don't be stupid. Now get out of here before you get hurt," James muttered.
Nutty Q smiled, eyebrow raised slightly. "Ouch, I got a nerve."
"Do you have a death wish or something?" James asked.
"I cannot die remember freak," Nutty Q said.
"You're calling me a freak? You're a Q, but you can get hurt and can't do as much as the others," James said.
"You know what I still can do. One little snap of the fingers will make that virus inside of Jessie, disappear in an instant," Nutty Q said.
The door opened, Jessie rushed in just in time to witness Nutty Q receive a hard punch in the face. He fell backwards onto the ground, but didn't move afterwards.
"Oh for god's sake," she groaned as she made her way over. "You didn't need to do that."
"I really did, you haven't listened to him for the last five minutes," James said.
"So is that your answer to everything now? Something annoys you, you hit it," Jessie questioned.
"No but... I had to, he said..." James stuttered.
"I don't care what he said, I've probably heard it already," Jessie snapped. "Yeah I don't like him, but you shouldn't have hit him."
"I didn't just hit him when he started annoying me, it wasn't like I just.." James said.
"That's not the point is it? I thought you'd trust me enough to not get jealous or angry with somebody who likes me," Jessie said.
"Ok, what about Zare?" James asked.
"What about her? When she kissed you I didn't go off and have a fight with her," Jessie muttered. "Q's not a threat to us, same with Zare. At least with her I admitted how I felt about it all."
"Jess, I haven't. Zare wasn't really trying, he is," James said.
"So? Don't you trust me, haven't I proved to you enough that I want to be with you. Some annoying Q that likes me doesn't change a bloody thing," Jessie grumbled.
"I know that but he isn't giving up so easily, I had..." James said.
"You're totally missing my point. Maybe you should come back to me when you get it," Jessie muttered. She turned back and walked out.
Nutty Q sat up, "hmm, trouble in paradise ey?" He disappeared.
The Ready Room:
Kathryn was sitting behind her desk, drinking coffee. The door chimed.
"Come in," Kathryn said.
Jessie stormed into the room. "Captain, can I kill that damn Q?" she asked angrily.
"Which Q?" Kathryn asked.
"Well the one that's been stalking me all day," Jessie replied.
"Oh I see, I'm having similar problems with another Q. I know how you feel," Kathryn said.
"Really? Has that Q been following you around every second of the day?" Jessie asked.
"Not every second," Kathryn replied.
"And, has he picked at least two fights with Chakotay?" Jessie asked.
"He did have a brief run in with him this morning," Kathryn replied.
"Did it include punches?" Jessie asked.
"No. But if you think about it, Chakotay is just a friend of mine, I'm not pregnant with his child. Maybe that Q who's following you thinks that he's comp..." Kathryn replied.
"I've guessed that already," Jessie muttered. "It's just James, he's jealous and he shouldn't be."
"I doubt he can help that, and I can't really blame him," Kathryn said. She climbed out of her chair, then made her way over to the sofa.
"But he doesn't need to fight with Q. I can't stand that guy, he has nothing to worry about. He knows better than anyone that 99% of guys, I wouldn't even look at twice. The other 0 point something would be lucky to get a meh out of me," Jessie said. "He's really the only one that I've liked, at the very least."
"Jessie, Chakotay told me about an incident on the bridge about a month ago," Kathryn said as she sat down. "You were obviously jealous of that Zare girl, and were arguing like crazy."
"Don't remind me about that!" Jessie yelled.
"Calm down, yelling at me isn't going to get you anywhere. Maybe if you ignore that Q, he'll leave you alone," Kathryn said calmly.
"Try telling that to James," Jessie muttered.
"I think only you can tell him that," Kathryn said.
"He wouldn't listen to me. Q must have really got to him," Jessie said.
"I'll tell you what, I'll talk to the other Q for you. He might be able to persuade him to leave you alone," Kathryn said.
"He'd better, or I'll hurt him a few more times myself," Jessie said. She walked out.
Kathryn shook her head before taking a sip of her coffee. She heard what sounded like a muffled moan come from her desk. She gently put down her coffee and made her way back over to the desk. Underneath the desk lay an adorable brown Labrador puppy.
Kathryn gasped as her face lit up, she knelt down to gather the puppy into her arms. Her face quickly stiffened, "this isn't going to work Q."
"How could you ignore that face," Q, who was now sitting on the side of her desk, said softly.
"He's adorable," Kathryn muttered, handing over the puppy to him. "But this has to stop, and that's the same with your friend."
"Please, accept him as a small token of my affection," Q said.
"No," Kathryn said.
Q glanced down at the puppy in his arms, he was looking at him. "Suit yourself. Can we talk? Just talk." He walked over to sit down on the sofa. Kathryn raised a finger before making her way over.
"I'm afraid that I haven't been sincere," he said as she sat down. She turned her head towards him, surprised. "When you first asked why I wanted to have a child with you, I made jokes, bragged about my prowess, engaged in sexual innuendo. I was using all that to cover up my true feelings."
"And I suppose you're going to share your true feelings with me now," Kathryn said.
Q turned his head to her, "I'm lonely."
"Lonely?" she repeated, even more surprised than before.
James had sat back down behind the desk, staring at nothing in particular like he was thinking. Nutty Q reappeared, further away from the desk than the last time.
"Are you happy now?" James asked without even looking at him.
"Kind of. I didn't want to see her mad, and don't say that like it was my fault," Nutty Q said.
"I didn't mean it to sound like that," James said. He finally turned his head to look at him, "what do you want now?"
"We still have this matter to resolve," Nutty Q replied.
"Thanks, but I think it looks better if I talk to her on my own," James said.
"Oh funny," Nutty Q sarcastically muttered.
"What's your challenge this time, a coin toss?" James questioned.
"Personally, I don't know what she sees in you," Nutty Q muttered.
"Just answer the question," James said.
"You made me think of something. While you're around, I have no chance. So let's settle this like human men used to," Nutty Q said.
"You've already done the gun one," James said.
"I know. I challenge you to a fight to the death," Nutty Q said.
James tried not to laugh, "right, I don't know where to start on that one."
"You can start by facing me instead of joking around like a coward," Nutty Q grumbled.
James' face quickly stiffened. "Why would I ever be afraid of you?"
"One, I'm more powerful than you'll ever be," Nutty Q said. "Two if you lose, which you will, I get Jessie."
"You really won't. She'll probably hate you more than she does now," James said.
"Wow, you're full of yourself aren't you?" Nutty Q said.
"No, I just know Jessie. Something else I know is that you're immortal, that's not really fair," James said.
"Fine," Nutty Q groaned. Two swords appeared, one in each hand. "I've always wanted to try these out. Anyway the winner is the one who's in a killing position."
"That kinda beats the idea but whatever," James said as he made his way around the desk again.
Nutty Q handed him the sword that was in his left hand. "Enough games, I'm going to prove my love to her and she's going to be mine."
James stared at him blankly. Just as Q raised the sword he had, James used his to knock it clean out of his hand with just one gentle nudge.
"What are you doing?" he asked. James just smiled at him in a way that creeped him out, he walked right passed him and stepped out of the room. "But, we didn't, that didn't count!"
Everything was calm and eerily peaceful on the bridge.
"Anybody fearing the worst?" Tom broke the silence.
Harry glanced around, his nervous gaze stopped on Jessie who was standing at the console behind the command chairs. "Think she'll blow or something?"
Tom nodded his head, "she'll crack any minute now."
"What are you two girls mumbling about?" Jessie grumbled without looking up from the console.
"Um, no girls are talking, it's just us," Harry said.
Tom groaned into his hand, "ugh Harry, don't give her more ammo."
The turbolift doors opened, James stepped out and made his way over to Jessie.
"Any second he's going to get his head bitten off," Tom said quietly.
"Hey," James said.
Jessie glanced at him briefly, "hey."
"Look um, I just came to apologise," James said. "You were right. He wasn't worth it and there really was no reason for me to be acting like that. So I'm sorry."
Jessie smiled as she turned to him, "you are forgiven. It didn't take you long to get what I meant."
"No, in a way I already knew he was no threat to us. I should have kept my temper. So, are we ok?" James questioned, raising his shoulders.
"Of course we are," Jessie replied. She placed a hand on his shoulder, he relaxed them as she did. "It's too bad we're on the bridge, I so want to kiss as we made up."
"Not a problem," James said. He glanced around to see who was around, his attention focused on the viewscreen. "My god, is that a video of B'Elanna showering on the viewscreen?" Everyone's heads turned to the viewscreen, Tom's went the fastest of course.
James and Jessie quickly shared a kiss while everyone was looking at the screen.
Tom cringed. "Ah whiplash," he groaned. "Hey, there's no video."
Tuvok's eyebrow raised, "why do you keep doing that?"
James turned to him, "I've got a better one, why did you even look?"
"Never mind," Tuvok replied.
"Commander," Harry called from opps.
Chakotay looked over, "what is it?"
"You're not going to believe this. Two stars are going to go supernova. We're way too close to avoid them," Harry replied.
Chakotay climbed out of his chair, he tapped his commbadge. "Bridge to Janeway."
In: "Go ahead."
"You'd better come to the bridge Captain," Chakotay said.
In: "I'll be right there."
Kathryn stepped onto the bridge, followed by the usual Q and a tall woman with red hair. "Report."
"Two stars in the area are about to go supernova," Chakotay said.
"Can't we just jump to warp to escape them?" Tom asked.
"No time, if we try we'll still be caught in the blast," Harry replied.
"If we move to the co-ordinates I've sent to the helm, we would be less affected by any debris," James said, working on the console Jessie was at. Q made his way over to watch what he was doing.
"Got them, setting a course," Tom said.
"Something's not right about all of this," Kathryn muttered to herself. She started to make her way over to where Jessie, James and Q were. "A star going supernova is an event that occurs once every century in this galaxy. We're about to witness our third in the space of two days, in the same area. Why do I think that you had something to do with this." Q sighed and looked away.
"She may be a member of an intellectually challenged species, but she's right. Your irresponsible behavior is continuing to have cosmic consequences," the red headed woman said.
"Would you stop overreacting," Q snapped at her. "Always nagging, now you see why I left her."
"Are you causing these supernova's?" Kathryn asked.
"Well not exactly," Q replied.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Kathryn asked.
"Twenty seconds until they both go nova," Harry said just as Nutty Q appeared nearby him.
"Great timing guys," he muttered. "Jessie, I have a wonderful idea my dear."
"Oh for god's sake," Jessie muttered.
Kathryn walked around her and James, Q turned to face her. "Will you do something Q!"
"Well if you insist," he said with a smile. He raised his hand to click his fingers.
"Ah you copycat," Nutty Q grumbled. He quickly clicked his, he and Jessie disappeared. Kathryn and the other Q disappeared right afterwards.
The red headed woman looked in the direction they once were in shock. "That two timing toad," she grumbled. She clicked her fingers and also disappeared.
"Ten seconds," Harry said.
Chakotay walked over to helm, and held onto one of the stations. "Bridge to all hands, brace for impact." Seconds later the ship was tossed aside, console exploded.
Kathryn reappeared wearing an eighteenth or nineteenth century dress, her hair all tied up. She looked around her new surroundings; an old fashioned but posh looking and large sitting room. "Q? Where have..."
"What the? Why am I wearing this thing!?" Jessie screeched from nearby. She was also wearing an old fashioned dress, her hair was still down but was curly. "What's going on?"
"I don't know," Kathryn replied. She marched over to one of the tall doorways, then tried to open them but they wouldn't budge. The other doors burst open, Q and Nutty Q both emerged wearing uniforms.
"You can't impregnate a girl who's already with child, I see no point in this," Q was muttering.
"You never listen to me, do you?" Nutty Q grumbled. He turned to his left only to get a hard punch in the face by Jessie, he of course fell to the ground.
"Why did you bring me here you creep, look at me. I look like a clown!" she yelled at him.
Q shook his head as he looked Kathryn's way. "I haven't got time for your little fantasies, return us to Voyager," Kathryn said.
"This is no fantasy, you're in the Q continuum now," Q said. He took off the hat he had on as he made his way over to the fireplace.
Nutty Q got his bearings back and pulled himself back up, "well I think you look even more beautiful."
Kathryn ignored him, "the continuum?"
"I don't care where I am, take me back now," Jessie snapped.
"Can't, it's not possible," Nutty Q said.
"Enough," Kathryn hissed in Q's direction. "All I care about is the well being of my ship and crew."
"Well I'm sure your first officer, Chuckles is it? I'm sure he's got everything under control for the moment," Q said.
"I'd like to see that for myself, if you don't mind," Kathryn said.
Nutty Q turned to her, "like I said, we really can't send you back."
"And why not?" Jessie asked. "Can't you at least give me back the clothes I had on before?"
"It's really complicated, and no," Nutty Q replied meekly.
"You shouldn't have brought her here Q, it's not safe. Is that your solution?" Q muttered in his direction.
Nutty Q's mouth dropped open, "how dare you accuse me of that."
"Then why bring her here?" Q asked.
Kathryn rolled her eyes, she walked closer to him. "Tell us what's going on."
"I'll do better than that, I'll show you," Q said. He made his way over to the large window, then opened the shutters. Everyone gathered around.
On the other side of the window it was mostly black, the only light was a few fires in the distance and brief flashes of light. The silence between them allowed them to hear guns firing.
"The Continuum is burning, the Q are in the middle of a civil war," Q said.
Jessie looked confused, while Kathryn watched the battle outside. "What's the point of that, Q's can't die or anything, and they can have what they want right?" Jessie said.
"I told you it was complicated," Nutty Q said.
"Start explaining," Kathryn said.
"Do you remember our friend Quinn?" Q questioned.
"No," Kathryn replied.
"Oh right, he was just referred to as Q2," Q said.
Nutty Q rolled his eyes, "oh great, he just loves to tell the story of how he lead us all into a freedom war."
"I seem to remember a certain someone telling the same version, with you in instead of me," Q said.
"Freedom war?" Jessie said.
Q was about to say something but Nutty Q butted in, "he made this big thing about Q's being restricted from any freedoms. A lot of us followed him, thinking it was all for the best. But now look at the state of the continuum, and you've already seen what it's doing to the universe."
Kathryn turned her head towards him, "the supernova's."
"They're actually galactic crossfire," Q said.
"Again I ask, what's the point in firing at each other?" Jessie muttered.
"There isn't, this war is pointless," Nutty Q said.
"It maybe terrible but it presents a wonderful opportunity," Q said.
"How is anything about a war wonderful?" Kathryn asked him.
"War is an engine of change, it could pave the way for a greater Q society. Your own civil war brought an end to slavery and oppression," Q replied.
"That civil war was fought at a time before humans had learned to solve their disputes without bloodshed. Surely the Q can find a non violent way to solve a conflict," Kathryn said.
Q's face lit up slightly, "that's where you come in."
"And not me," Jessie muttered in Nutty Q's direction, he pouted.
"What do either of us have to do with any of this, Q?" Kathryn asked.
"I want you to help me transform the Q, like that civil war transformed a nation," Q replied.
"By mating with you?" Kathryn said, even more confused than before.
"I know, it's brilliant isn't it," Q said.
"Thanks, it was a good idea," Nutty Q said.
Q shook his head, "it wasn't yours."
"I don't see how a baby would end a war between a race of omnipotent beings," Kathryn said.
"Simple. Mating would create a new breed of Q. Combine the omnipotence of the Q with the best humanity has to offer," Q said.
Jessie struggled to keep a straight face, "her, really? No offense but she'd start a war over coffee, and she loses her temper a lot."
Nutty Q smiled, "I agree. Her offspring could be very violent. Surely you'd know that already Q."
Q stared at him with narrowed eyes, "I'm sure it was the father's sides that did that."
Kathryn looked confused again, "father's, what are you talking about? And Jessie, you're one to talk."
Something hit the window and exploded, sending glass everywhere. Q pushed Kathryn to the ground and he went with her. Nutty Q grabbed a hold of Jessie, they ended up in the corner of the room.
Q lifted himself up, "well what's it going to be?" He grunted in pain, then collapsed on to his side. Kathryn sat up to look over him. They both spotted a bloody wound on his right arm.
"You're bleeding," she gasped.
Everyone ducked as more bullets were shot into the room.
The bridge was in tatters; almost everyone were lying on the ground, consoles continually sparked or exploded and most of the lights were out.
Chakotay pulled himself to his feet, "damage report."
"Shields are down, minor damage on all decks. Warp is down," Harry said. "We're sixteen billion kilometres from our previous location."
"So much for avoiding debris," Tom muttered, glancing behind him.
"Actually we didn't hit any, we were lucky," Harry said.
"You're welcome really," James muttered.
Chakotay meanwhile had spotted the red head was still around. She pulled herself up and made her way towards the turbolift near Harry. Chakotay quickly marched over to catch up with her. James stepped in her way and took a hold of her arm, Chakotay stopped nearby.
"Get your little pet Slayer boy off me or I will hurl this ship and everything on it into the Thorinian Ice Age," she snapped.
"I don't think you can," Chakotay commented. He nodded at James, he let her go.
"Pet Slayer?" he muttered.
She shook her head while stepping away from them. "Don't be ridiculous." She clicked her fingers, but nothing happened.
"Obviously somehow you've lost your powers, if you had them you wouldn't still be here and you wouldn't have that scratch on your forehead. Now start talking or I'll get our 'little pet Slayer boy' to hurl your ass into the brig," Chakotay muttered.
Tom tried not to laugh, "oh Chakotay, you're walking on hot coal barefooted there."
"And holding a leaking petrol can in his hands," James grumbled.
The female Q sighed and rolled her eyes.
in the Continuum:
The two Q's, Jessie and Kathryn were now taking cover behind a large sofa. Kathryn was using ripped off bits of her dress to put pressure on the bleeding. Nutty Q occasionally fired his own gun at the hole in the window.
"I didn't know a Q could be injured," Kathryn said.
"Like I said, this is only a representation on what is happening," Q said.
"Here's a lesson to you guys then, no representing. What's the right word?" Jessie said.
"I can assure you, those are not mere lead charges being fired at us," Q said.
"Then what, are they some sort of Q weapons?" Kathryn questioned.
"You'd be surprised at the ingenuity of an immortal being bent on destroying another," Q replied.
Everyone heard a voice outside telling the others to hold their fire. Everyone but Q peered over or around the sofa, Nutty Q seemed to recognise the voice and hid again. The voice said, "you're surrounded Q, surrender now, we'll be merciful."
Kathryn turned back to Q, "call a truce, talk to them. Maybe you can resolve this peacefully."
"Put your hands up Q's!" the voice demanded.
Q took out his own gun and pulled himself up slowly. He staggered across the room, leaned on the wall beside the window and peered out of it. "I'll never surrender, you know that!" he yelled as began firing at them.
"Resume fire," the voice commanded. Again the bullets started flying.
Nutty Q pulled Jessie out of sight, she didn't look happy afterwards.
"Q, take the other window. You two there's a rifle on the wall, one of you take it," Q ordered.
"I like it here," Nutty Q said, smiling briefly at Jessie who just rolled her eyes.
Kathryn looked over the sofa, "this is your fight Q, not ours."
"Really? If their weapons can make me bleed, imagine what they'll do to you," Q said. What looked like a grenade was tossed in, it exploded nearby Q knocking him to the ground.
"Jessie go, Q help me out," Kathryn said before rushing over to take a hold of Q by the arms. Nutty Q sighed, he rushed over to get his legs. Jessie meanwhile had gotten to the door, she waited by it until they had dragged Q out.
in what looked like a large camp:
Kathryn was tending to Q's bullet wound nearby a camp fire. Jessie was sitting on the other side, Nutty Q kept edging closer every now and then. Kathryn and Q were busy discussing the situation.
"So, did you think I fought bravely or what?" Nutty Q questioned, smiling.
Jessie glanced at him, "yeah sure, if bravely means hiding your head and firing at the window without looking. And then panicking over my shadow on the way here."
Nutty Q pouted, "I thought it was somebody elses."
"I hope you're happy. If a bullet hits me and I die, I'm haunting you," Jessie muttered.
"Do not worry my sweet, I won't let anything happen to you," Nutty Q sighed.
"God, if me being pregnant and in a serious relationship doesn't put you off, what will?" Jessie grumbled.
"I understand now, but it doesn't mean that I can't still love you and protect you from harm," Nutty Q said.
Jessie shook her head, "so you do love me, and that wasn't just some chat up line for your little 'breed a new Q' plan?"
"Ohno, I chose you because I had fallen for you," Nutty Q replied.
Jessie sighed, "that's great, just great." She stood up.
"Where are you going?" Nutty Q asked.
"For a walk around the camp," Jessie replied. "Alone," she said before walking away. Nutty Q sighed.
Kathryn meanwhile was nearly at a loss with Q. "But I don't love you, Q."
"Yes but what does that have to do with it?" Q stuttered.
"Everything, it's the foundation of a family. I couldn't have a child with someone I didn't love," Kathryn replied.
"But what about that blonde kid?" Q asked.
"All right, another child," Kathryn groaned. "I mean he's proof enough that parents have to be in love, care about and trust each other. Because I had him after a drunken one night stand, he was torn between two parents and that wasn't good for him. Giving him up was the hardest thing I had to do in my life, and I couldn't do it again."
"You wouldn't have to give it up, I mean who else would raise the little tike?" Q questioned.
"Oh I see, I'd have to do all the work," Kathryn replied. "You know, you and James' father have something in common."
"You're comparing me to a violent and twisted human male?" Q said in disgust.
"Doesn't matter Q. You already have a candidate and it's not me, you'll have to figure out the rest yourself," Kathryn said. She climbed onto her feet after ripping off a bit of the white on the dress. "Now I'm going to the enemy camp and show this flag so they know you're willing to talk about a cease fire."
"Kathy, don't be a hero," Q muttered.
"I'm going Q. If I were you, I'd get thinking about your part," Kathryn said. She walked away.
On the edge of the camp she found Jessie standing, facing the forest. "Where are you going?" she asked.
"Enemy camp, it's time the fighting stopped," Kathryn replied.
"Won't they shoot at you?" Jessie questioned.
Kathryn raised the white 'flag', "not when I have this. If this is a representation of the civil war then they should know what it means."
"All right, can I come?" Jessie asked.
"Is Q still bothering you?" Kathryn asked.
Jessie nodded, "yeah, so can I?"
"Fine, but be careful," Kathryn replied. They both made their way into the blackness of the forest.
Everyone present were at their usual spots; Tom at the helm, Tuvok at Tactical, Harry at opps, and Chakotay nearby the command chairs. The female Q was sitting in the Captains chair like she owned the place. James was again at the console behind her.
"You, helm boy!" the female Q barked in Tom's direction. Tom looked up with an insulted expression on his face, Harry and James meanwhile developed smirks on their faces. The Q in charge told him where to take the ship, he turned to Chakotay looking for confirmation.
Chakotay nodded his head. Harry's smirk quickly faded as he read the readings on his station. "Commander, that course leads directly into a supernova."
"What?" Chakotay grumbled, lowering the PADD he was working on. He turned to Q2.
She raised her shoulders, "you said you wanted to get into the continuum."
"Yes but in one piece," Chakotay muttered.
"Try to wrap your minuscule little minds around this," Q2 muttered, pulling herself out of the chair. She made her way over to Chakotay. "These supernova's are caused by the war in the continuum. Each time a star goes nova all the matter left behind is sucked into the continuum."
"So Voyager will be pulled in too?" Chakotay questioned.
"If we time it perfectly, or else the explosion will turn you all into micro fragments," Q2 replied, smiling smugly for some reason.
"Commander, close proximity to a star going super nova will cause damage to Voyager, if or not we time it perfectly," Tuvok pointed out.
Q2 sighed, "you're so negative."
"He does have a point," Chakotay said.
Q2 rolled her eyes, "humanoids, Q to Engineering."
In: "Go ahead Q."
Q2 proceeded to send B'Elanna a lot more technobabble.
"Helm boy. What's that about?" Tom muttered.
"You work at the helm and as far as we know you're a guy," Harry replied with a smirk.
"Yeah relax, she didn't insult you," James said.
"Try not to take it too personally, she probably only called you little cos she's a giant," Harry said.
Q2 finished her technobabble, Chakotay looked lost for words. "Did that make any sense at all to you B'Elanna."
In: "I think so."
"Comforting," Tom said quietly. "We're thirteen seconds away, we can still change course."
"No maintain course," Chakotay ordered.
Kathryn and Jessie were lead into a small tent by some soldiers. One went inside first to notify the general, he left as they walked inside.
"Ah Captain Janeway I presume," General Q said, standing up. "It's good to finally meet you madam, please sit down."
Kathryn raised her hand and shook her head. Jessie shrugged, she sat down instead and rested a hand on her stomach.
General Q sighed, "I hear you entered our camp unarmed."
"That's right," Kathryn said.
"The Continuum is a dangerous place for all of us now, let alone two human females. I admire your bravery," General Q said.
"I've come to present an offer of truce from Q," Kathryn said.
"With all due respect madam, the time for negotiating has passed," General Q said.
"But do you agree the fighting has to stop?" Kathryn asked.
"Most certainly. This is why we intend to end it in the most expedient way possible," General Q replied.
"I'm relieved to hear you say that," Kathryn said as she sat down beside Jessie. "May I ask how?"
"Well it's simple really. As Q's the leader of this so called freedom faction, we will have to execute him," General Q replied.
"With all due respect sir, there are many dark chapters in our history where neighbours were pitted against each other. Q has an idea that'll bring about a new era of Q, I suggest you listen to what he has to say," Kathryn said.
"I'd be eternally in your debt if you tell me where to find him," General Q said.
"I won't help you do that," Kathryn muttered.
"No, I didn't think you would," General Q said with a smile.
The tent door opened, a soldier pushed Q inside. "Ok this isn't going well," Jessie commented, looking uncomfortable.
"Wait, he isn't interested in fighting anymore, let him go," Kathryn said.
"She's right, I had a change of heart," Q said.
"Grovel all you want Q, I've been waiting for this for an eternity," General Q said. He turned to the soldier. "Put them all in chains."
"Hey what for?" Jessie said.
Kathryn got onto her feet, "what are you charging us with?"
"Collaborating with the enemy. That crime's punishable by death," General Q replied.
"But I only wanted to go for a walk," Jessie muttered as she stood up. More soldiers came in and started attaching chains to them. "Seriously, you're going to execute a pregnant woman?"
General Q didn't answer, he sat back down at his desk.
"Ok that's two people I'm haunting now," Jessie said as she was dragged out of the tent.
Kathryn shook her head as she was too.
little while later:
The three prisoners were sitting inside another tent, hands chained together.
"I can't believe it, why do they want to kill us?" Jessie questioned.
"I don't get it either," Kathryn replied quietly, passing Q a quick stare.
Jessie shook her head as she rested one arm on her knees, and her chin on the arm. "I can't believe this is happening."
Kathryn turned to her, "it's going to be ok."
"No it's not, in a few minutes we're going to get executed," Jessie snapped. She glanced over at Q, "I thought you guys were supposed to be advanced, no advanced race has the death penalty."
"Jessie, try to stay calm," Kathryn gently said.
"How can I? My baby's going to die just because of some uptight Q," Jessie muttered.
Kathryn closed her eyes, "I know. I should have made you stay behind, I'm sorry."
"No it's my fault, I just wanted to get away from that loved up Q," Jessie said. "You know I've been waiting all my life for somebody to love me, it's typical that it would be some annoying guy who barely even knows me."
"What are you talking about? Surely your parents and family loved you," Kathryn said.
"My dad nicked off before I was born, my mother did a dip to see which of the twins she'd keep and it didn't land on me. My sister, when I did see her she was more worried about herself to notice I was even there," Jessie muttered. "Then there's my foster family. Ali was more of a friend than anything else, my other sisters I barely knew and mum, she couldn't wait to get rid of me."
"Oh," Kathryn sighed.
"And now I've got this baby who hopefully would have loved me, but knowing me I probably wouldn't feel the same," Jessie said.
"Of course you would," Kathryn said.
"How can you be so sure about that?" Jessie questioned. "I can't even figure out my feelings for James. Everyone keeps saying that if you don't know if you are, then you won't be in love. They're probably right but I don't get it, I'm crazy about him but yet I still haven't figured out what love is. Now I'll never will."
Kathryn sighed, "I don't thi..."
"It's probably for the best you know, I'm probably too cold hearted and dead inside to be capable of it," Jessie said.
"You're not, Jessie," Kathryn said. "If you didn't care, or are incapable of loving somebody you wouldn't be scared right now."
"Right, how do you know that I'm not just worried about my own life," Jessie questioned.
"Because I know you're not, and so do you. I understand why you don't understand it, but I promise you, it'll come to you," Kathryn replied.
"It won't, cos we're going to die," Jessie said.
Right on cue the door opened, several soldiers walked in. They guided the prisoners out into the dim sunlight. They passed the General and a couple of soldiers preparing rifles. The soldiers unchained them, forced their arms behind them to go around separate trees, then were chained up again.
"Do you have any last words?" General Q asked.
"Yeah I do. You're all stupid assholes with your stupid guns, that are over compensating for something I think," Jessie muttered. Kathryn looked on, worried. "I hope you guys can die in this war, that way I'll be able to get back at you in hell." She glanced in the direction of General Q, "and you, stop looking and acting like you've got a tree wedged up your ass, what a b***ard."
"Are you quite finished yet?" he asked.
"No but whatever, I can't delay your little thrill for the day," Jessie muttered in response.
"All right, Cap..." General Q said.
"Stupid fat General, he has to kill innocent ish women that are carrying babies, and you called us a savaged race," Jessie continued to mutter.
"Captain," General Q repeated.
"I would but she's basically took what I wanted to say, but I wanted to say it in a nicer way. Ok um, don't do this. Don't continue using violence to resolve your differences," Kathryn said.
"Q would you like to add anything to that?" General Q questioned.
Q turned his attention to Kathryn, "today I sacrifice my existence for the principles of freedom and individuality that I've fought for so long. But these women are innocent, and what's more one saved my life. And she tried to save us from each other. Kill me if you must, but let them go."
"Very touching speech Q, but as usual, your rhetoric fails to compensate for your irresponsibility," General Q said. He walked away. The men with the rifles stood in a line, they got ready to fire.
Kathryn heard some whispering come from Jessie's direction, she turned her head around to look at her. "Aim for the head, aim for the neck, just don't aim there," she was whispering. Kathryn stared at her with wide eyes before turning her head back.
"I'm sorry," Q whispered to her.
"I know," Kathryn whispered back.
"Fire!" General Q bellowed. Guns started firing.
Q groaned, "I'm hit!"
Kathryn looked down at herself, at Jessie and then over to Q.
"I'm dying," Q groaned.
"What the?" Jessie said, all confused.
Kathryn raised an eyebrow at Q, "Q, they're not firing at us." All three glanced to the right, all of the men with rifles were firing at something in the distance, and dodging shots.
Not that far away, Chakotay and Tuvok were firing guns at the Q's, of course they were wearing blue uniforms. Not far behind them Faye was hiding behind a tree freaking out.
"Oh my god, it's a nightmare," she whimpered, looking down at the dress she had on.
Tom and Harry, also wearing uniforms, kept moving from tree to tree, firing small guns. "So glad I had practise recently," Tom said to Harry. He shook his head as he ducked behind a tree.
"Tom look," Harry said, smirking. He beckoned his head towards B'Elanna in one of those dresses, beating the snot out of a Q.
"Ugh, I can barely move in this thing," she grunted before pushing the Q's head into a tree. She turned around just in time to see Neelix whiz passed wearing only the uniform pants. Lots of Q's and Voyager crewmembers screamed in the distance.
Moving on. James was using the rifle he had to beat any Q's that came by. The female Q stood nearby a tree watching him with a raised eyebrow.
One Q pointed a gun at him, he ducked and used the rifle to trip the Q over.
"Hmm, omnipotent my ass," he commented.
Chakotay lowered the rifle he had as he spotted Kathryn, Jessie and Q. He looked over to where James was. "James, they're down there!" he yelled, pointing the rifle in their direction.
He looked towards where he was pointing, "ok, ready?" He rushed off towards them, Q2 ran after him but the dress made it difficult to go fast.
"Q for the last time, you didn't get hit," Kathryn grumbled in Q's direction.
Jessie was looking around, ignoring them. She then spotted James and Q2 heading their way. Her face lit up, "James."
"What?" Kathryn said, turning her head. Q's face also lit up when he spotted who was coming.
They both finally got to them. Q2 stood in front of Q, and folded her arms in a sign of protest. James went around the tree to get the chains off Jessie, he moved back around. She threw her arms around him, and buried her head in his shoulder.
"Oh my darling I knew you'd come for me," Q said. "Aren't you going to untie me?"
"How will I know you won't just go off with the first bipedal female that catches your eye?" Q2 replied harshly.
James and Jessie separated a little. "Are you ok?" he asked as he pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear.
"No I wasn't, I'm ok now," Jessie replied. She caressed his cheek with her right hand, "I'm still wearing a dress though." He smiled then kissed her forehead.
"I hate to interrupt but, can I be unchained too?" Kathryn said impatiently.
"Oh right," James said, he quickly went over to unchain her. Q2 was now unchaining Q, while he talked about his plan.
Tom walked over to the group with General Q. "Captain, what should we do with him?"
"Shoot him, see how he likes it," Jessie replied.
James glanced briefly at her, then the General. "He was the one?"
"He ordered it yeah," Jessie replied.
"Oh, then let me be alone with him for five minutes, it's all I ask," James grumbled. He made his way over, holding the rifle tighter than before. Kathryn and Jessie quickly took a hold of each of his arms to hold him back.
"If I were you Captain, I'd tame your Slayer before he does any damage," General Q muttered.
The two Q's finished their discussion, they made their way over to the group. "Q and I have a plan to end the war, call off your troops," Q2 said.
"Do as she says and I'll call my people off," Kathryn said.
"They may by humanoids but they're using our weapons," Q2 said.
General Q sighed, he turned away. "Cease fire," he bellowed.
"Tell our people to stop shooting," Kathryn said to Tom. He nodded and walked away.
"Well my darling, how do you think we should do this historic act of procreation?" Q questioned.
"I've thought of nothing else since you suggested it," Q2 replied. She whispered a few things in his ear, he blushed and laughed.
Kathryn turned her head away to the left. Jessie giggled as James put an arm around her waist, and continually kissed her on the face.
Kathryn didn't know where to look now, one side there was those two and on the other side of her were the Q's.
"Oh I love it when you talk dirty," Q said. Q2 smiled cheekily.
"So do you think you can get that uniform in another colour?" Jessie asked, glancing briefly at Kathryn with a glint in her eye.
"What really? Please tell me you're joking," James replied, looking worried. His expression quickly changed again as he started playing with a lock of her hair, "do you think you can..."
"No, no dresses, ever," Jessie blurted out.
James smirked, "no, get your hair actually done like this."
Kathryn shuddered and walked away. She failed to hear Jessie whispering, "I just mentioned the uniform to freak her out, don't worry."
"Kathy, don't you want to watch?" Q asked.
"No I really don't want to watch them," Kathryn replied in disgust. She continued to walk away, muttering to herself.
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